Bella Masen: The Epitome of Classy
by taylorishotterthanrob
Summary: Two years after The June Cleaver Experience, Edward and Bella take on two new cases. Marriage and Children. Oh and there's also the fact that Edward has taken on the job of protecting a beautiful millionaire with a price on his head. 2nd in The BM Trilogy
1. Chapter 1

_**Welcome to Bella Masen: The Epitome of Classy! I had actually planned to update over my Thanksgiving break but I guess that didn't work out… awkward.**_

_**I would like to thank all of my reviewers from the last chapter of Bella Swan: The June Cleaver Experience! We got so many that I was almost in tears… much love to you all that reviewed and alerted and what not.**_

_**So here's a little background information. After the small break away I felt as though I had lost my funny. Then during my break I thought I had found it. **_

_**False Alarm.**_

_**Yeah so I actually did find my funny at last weekend… I hope you feel I found it again as well. Leave me a review!**_

_**The update schedule for this story will be much like the first one, just so you know.**_

_**Yes… so WARNING if you don't like lemons *clears throat* Get the fuck out! Haha I'm kidding. I kid. Get over it. Yeah but I starred the section right before and right after the lemon**_

_**Standard Disclaimer Applies**_

…_**TEC…**_

_**2 years later**_

"Night, Honey." I said kissed Seth's cheek after tucking him in, he smiled sleepily at me before drifting off to sleep. I brushed my hand over his soft hair before leaving the room. Edward passed me in the hall as we switched rooms and I pecked his lips earning a sexy ass grin from him. He went into Seth's room and I headed into Ellie's, as we did every night.

"Hi, gorgeous." I said as I took a seat next to her on the bed and pulled her little body under my arm. She pressed her face into the side of my breast and I kissed the top of her head. She was seven now and came up to my waist. Her curly copper hair had gotten much longer since Forks and she her two front teeth were missing so now she had that adorable lisp when she was calling Alice a whore.

_Too cute._

"Hi, Mommy._" _She greeted sleepily, her large green eyes blinked rapidly as she attempted to stay awake.

"Don't stay up on account of me, Pumpkin." I said as I moved away from her. I tucked her blanket in around her and kissed her cheek three times.

"I love you, Mommy."

"I love you too, Honey. Goodnight." I said before turning on her lava lamp and leaving the room. Once I got to the master bedroom I was met with the sight of Edward grumbling and looking as gorgeous as ever.

"What's up, Baby?" I asked before hopping into the bed behind him and picking up the book I had started the night before, it rested open on my lap as I waited for him to speak.

"Fucking assholes. I had that case in the bag and what does Newton do? Goes in and takes it right from under me." He sat on the bed and I got on my knees behind him, and rubbed his shoulders.

"I'm sure they'll put you back on the case, Baby." He shot me a skeptical look over his shoulder and I slapped his back.

"Don't look at me like that. I know you're upset but I didn't do anything to you, so don't come being a jackass to me." I said as I pulled away from him, sitting back on my heels.

"Are you on your period?"

"It depends." He looked over his shoulder again.

"Depends on if there's a reenactment of the red sea in your pants?"

"No- a reenactment of the red sea? That makes no sense."

"That's why I didn't major in English." I shook my head, there really wasn't any making sense with him.

"Regardless. Don't be a dick to me because of Newton."

"I know. I'm sorry, I just-" He pulled off his other shoe and threw it across the room. "Fuck." His hands slipped into his hair. "That fucking case could have been a big step in my career… it was just… taken." He said hanging his head, I slipped my arms around his waist and laid a kiss on his neck.

"The fucking Clearwater-Black case trials put Newton in the lead… That and the fact that he's probably fucking the chief." I thought over his words for a second before smacking the back of his head.

"Watch the way you talk about my father." I jokingly growled, he rubbed his hand over the spot I hit and I wrapped my legs around him from the back. "I have confidence in you, baby. Everything will work out." I rested my head on his back.

"Maybe… if I could get in with the chiefs daughter he'd trust me with the case."

"I doubt he'd appreciate you trying to get it in with me, then telling him about it… That could get awkward." I mumbled. He chuckled slightly before turning and pulling me into his lap. He turned me so that I straddled him and rocked his hips against me, kissing down my neck. I leaned away from him slightly, pecking his lips once more he attempted to deepen the kiss and I pushed him away.

"Edward… come on, I'm tired." He sighed and let me go before silently leaving the bed and stripping as he walked to the master bathroom. I groaned and picked up the discarded book.

******************************************************************************…TEC…**********************************************************************************

I closed my eyes as he dropped his pants, trying to restrain myself. I reopened them when I thought he had closed the door, but I was so wrong. He left the door open just enough so that I could see his naked form moving around. He opened the shower door and stepped in. The shower door was clear so when he closed it but it didn't really block anything. He squirted some soap into his hand before using that same hand to rub his length.

I rubbed my thighs together and begged myself to have some restraint but as I watched him through the door my pussy started throbbing. I slipped a hand between my legs and twirled my fingers over my clit, trying to relieve a bit of pressure before he came back. But my three fingers over the fabric on my pants weren't doing much and I gave up. Tossing my book aside and peeling my clothes off.

When I walked into the bathroom as naked as the day I was born Edwards eyes met mine and he smirked at me, wordlessly opening the door for me.

_Such a gentleman._

I managed to kick the bathroom door closed before I stepped into the hot spray with Edward. He pulled my wet body to his own and placed kisses down my neck. I pressed my breasts against his chest, rubbing my hard peaks against him. He stopped ravaging my neck to sink to his knees.

"Spread your legs, beautiful." He groaned huskily. I did as he asked and he ran his nose down my hip bone before reaching the apex of my thighs. His right hand trailed its way up my leg and his left squeezed and kneaded my ass. When his hand reached my knee he pushed it up over his shoulder and shoved two fingers in my throbbing heat. I tossed my head back and it hit the wall with a loud thump. Neither of us paid attention though, due to Edward being in the midst of suckling on my clit, while he fucked me with his fingers.

"What the fuck?" I groaned as his fingers slipped out of me. I was quickly satisfied though when the glorious tongue that was massaging my clit moved down and was thrusted into my tight pussy. His hand came up and he rubbed my clit furiously as his tongue slipped in and out of me at an alarmingly fast rate. He rocked his hips so that his dick hit my leg.

"Cum for me, Baby." He ordered, his eyes met mine as he went back to tongue fucking me. The sight alone would have me cumming for the rest of my life.

My legs started to shake and I swear I went blind. My orgasm rocked through me and every fucking drop of my cum was lapped up by Edward.

"Yes, Baby." I moaned as I rocked against his face. He moved my leg off of his shoulder and gently bumped my knee so that it buckled and I slid down the shower wall. He wrapped my legs around his waist, still on his knees, and thrusted into me in one swift movement.

"Feels so fucking good." He moaned as he pounded into me. I was so fucking euphoric that my head lolled onto his shoulder as he fucked the shit out of me. His hand snaked down and he rubbed my clit like his life depended on it. His mouth met mine and our tongues mingled and teased each other as he brought me closer to cumming. I could taste myself on his tongue but it only drove me to bounce harder on that glorious cock of his. I reached between us and massaged his balls as they slapped against me.

"Oh _FUCK_!" I called out as he thrust into me harder and more sporadically as I could tell he was close to cumming himself. My body shuddered again as I came. My orgasm sparked his own release as my pussy milked his thick cock.

His head rested in the crook of my neck as he went flaccid inside of me. I ran my fingers through his hair as we sat in the bottom of the shower together.

"I love you." I whispered, he nodded and kissed my shoulder before pulling out of me and standing up shakily. He extended a hand to me and helped me up. We both quickly showered and stepped out from under the progressively freezing water as fast as possible.

**********************************************************************************…TEC…*****************************************************************************

"Tired my ass." He smirked as he wrapped a towel around his waist.

"I can be tired and fuck you at the same time." I rolled my eyes and he tossed me a towel.

"I'll remember that you said that." He said as he pulled me to his chest. I pecked his lips before pushing away from him. A soft squealing noise came from our bedroom.

"Did you here that?" I asked, he shook his head and I cupped my hand over his mouth when he went to speak. He licked my hand and I didn't even flinch. That tongue had been almost everywhere on my body. Why the fuck would I care about my hand?

"Seth?" I whispered. Edward gave me a look and shrugged. I went to the bedside and picked up the baby monitor.

I was met with static before, "Ma…Ma… Mama…" He cried, tears sprung to my eyes as our second child said his first words. I slipped a robe on over my towel and darted next door where our eleven year old month son sat. He was playing with a stuffed animal as he… _sang_? I checked for any signs of tears and saw none. He was just as tone deaf as I was. I picked his little body up and cradled him to my chest. Edward sauntered in a few seconds later still running a towel through his hair. He had slipped into some low slung pajama pants and looked too good in them.

"Da-da-da…" Seth sung as he saw Edward enter the room. A tear slipped from my eye as he spoke. Edward how ever looked unfazed.

"Do you _hear _him?" I asked excitedly. "He's talking! Aren't you my smart little boy?" He grinned his little toothless grin and giggled at me as I blew raspberries on his stomach. His green eyes glinted with happiness when I did this.

"My handsome little boy." I cooed as I peppered his face with kisses. I looked over my shoulder at Edward who just watched us as if this shit happened every day.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked him, I let Seth wriggle around as I held him to my chest.

"Nothing." He truly looked like he didn't have a care in the world. I guess he had already experienced the first word thing with Ellie, but I felt like it should have been amazing no matter how many times you saw it.

"He's talking, Edward!" I squealed, Alice style.

"I know... He's been doing that since Sunday." He said as he sat in the rocking chair.

"Mama!" Seth squealed again. I smiled down at him despite his idiot father and kissed his cheek.

Today was Thursday… _night_.

"What?" I asked, hoping I had heard him wrong.

"He's been talking since Sunday." He repeated.

_Like a jackass._

My eyes widened. And I grinded my teeth together.

"_What_!" I shrieked.

"It's no big deal." He attempted to soothe. I grabbed the baby powder off of the changing table and threw it at his head, not knowing it was open. I was slightly off and it his him in the chest and exploded up into his face.

"What the fuck, Bella?" He cried.

"What the fuck me? What the fuck you, Edward!" I yelled. Seth started screaming from the loudness.

"I'm sorry, honey." I whispered to him before kissing his soft brown hair. I hummed to him and he started crying louder.

_Hey… I said I was tone deaf._

"Since fucking Sunday?" I whisper yelled, Edward nodded and brushed the baby powder from his eyes.

"Yeah, you and Alice were at lunch and he said my name." He whispered eyeing Seth's squirming body.

"Why did you think it'd be a good idea to keep this from me?" I hissed softly, Seth's eyes started to droop and I kissed him once more before laying him in the crib.

I strode out of the room as quickly as possible heading down to the living room, so that Ellie and Seth wouldn't wake up.

"Alright, Baby. Well I'm gonna' go to bed." Edward said as he leaned over the banister above me. The living room ceiling was twenty something feet tall and the second floor was visible, a banister sectioning off the hallway.

"The hell you are." I growled. He hung his head and turned and made his way to the steps. When he finally reached the first floor I had to stop myself from tackling him.

"Why the fuck-" I grabbed his hand and toted him toward the kitchen, which was farthest from the kids rooms. "I would have liked to have known that my baby said his first words." I complained. Edward bit the inside of his cheek.

"I'm sorry, Honey. I didn't want to disrupt you… and the game was on." My jaw tensed and I crossed my arms tightly over my chest. He came up to me and wrapped his arms around me, cupping my ass, before he dragged me towards his body.

"You are a jackass." I grumbled as he tilted my head up to look him in the eye. "I fucking hate you." His green eyes were smoldering and he pushed his lips on mine, making me melt in his embrace.

"No you don't." He whispered against my lips. I shoved his chest hard and slipped out of his arms.

"Well…I'm really pissed off." I said bluntly as I went to the linen closet. I pulled out our old duvet and a pillow, before pushing the items into his arms. "Couch."

"Come on, Baby. I have work tomorrow." He whined before wrapping his arms around me. I shrugged him off.

"So?"

"You don't want me dying because I have a crick in my neck and I can't see an armed man behind me." I rolled my eyes.

"Well if you end up getting shot, you probably shouldn't wait for four days to tell someone about it. They could miss something important." I deadpanned.

"Baby…"

"Goodnight, Edward." I turned on my heel before starting up the steps.

…TEC…

_**I sincerely hope you laughed and/or enjoyed**_

_**Leave me a note**_

_**I didn't cockblock either! Ahh the benefits of being married.**_

_**Also! After attending a class about the signs of an unhealthy relationship I came back and looked at this….**_

…_**Shame…**_

_**(P.s. Unhealthy relationships are just that, and they aren't a laughing matter so if you are, or you know someone in an abusive relationship physically or mentally GET HELP)**_

_**Yes, but their relationship is love filled and that's just kind of how our Bella is. Please don't flame. It isn't pleasant to read and discourages my writing process. I have also gotten a review from a reader (last story) that said some of Bella's actions weren't believable. Welp… to that I say this is fiction. This is my story. My version of Bella is out of the box. **_

_**Let me know if I found my funny or not because I would hate for anyone to be tortured of boredom while reading.**_

_**Continue or just leave it?**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks to everyone who alerted and reviewed! I appreciate them **_**TONS!**_

**Special thanks to kembie, Yummy dummy, Twifan1986, bearygirl,****luv2dance,****immortalwizardpirateelf,****dowlingnana (I'm not sure if I'll be finishing Locked Up… Due to a loss of interest. But I'll see what I can do), DenisseSchmidt, cait, Melnaugh, LastRedAppleStanding and****naturallyclutzy93.**

**You're words mean SO MUCH to me… you don't even understand….**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies **

…**TEC…**

"Mommy, come on. I _need_ ice cream." I rolled my eyes as I wiped off Seth's face. "Mommy! I am shaking harder than a crackhead on lent. I need it." She clutched my waist and looked up at me.

"If you keep eating like this you won't be able to fit through the door, Honey."

"We can remodel." She said like it was the simplest thing in the world.

"No." I kissed her forehead and the phone rang. She gave me Puppy dog eyes and held onto my waist as we shuffled towards the phone.

"Stop,"

"Ice cream."

"No." She let go of me and walked away but she had that same smile Edward gets when he's up to something stupid.

"Hello?" I asked yanking the phone off of the hook.

"Hi, Baby." Edward's voice greeted happily, I ran my hand through my messy hair and jumped up to sit on the counter.

"What's up?" I asked.

"Drop the kids off at Alice's at around four will you?"

"Why…?"

"Dinner."

"I was going to make dinner." He gagged on the other end of the phone and there was a laugh behind him, alerting me of Jaspers presence. "Don't make me castrate you, jackass." Jasper laughed harder and I rolled my eyes.

"How about you let me take you out? It can be like a date night."

"How about you come home and have dinner with all of us. We haven't all sat down together in a week." I cradled the phone between my shoulder and my ear.

"Because I have good news and it deserves to be celebrated."

"Until you hear what it is!" Jasper piped up, a thump sound and Jasper whined, "Hey, man!"

"Edward…"

"Please, Baby? It'll make up for Sunday."

"You taking me to a restaurant will _not_ make up for me missing my baby's first words."

"Ooh… you fucked up." Jasper alerted in the background.

"I said I was sorry honey. He'll have more firsts." I frowned as I looked at Seth, who was blowing spit bubbles at Ellie, she shot a glance over her shoulder at me and gave me a sneer, before turning back to Seth.

"Whatever. I'll drop the kids off. Where do you want me to meet you?" I conceded, I couldn't practically here him beaming on the other end of the phone as he rattled off the restaurant name.

"I love you, honey." He finished.

"I love you too. Bye."

"Bye." I clicked the end button on the phone and hung it back up before walking over to Seth and Ellie. When I went to clean Seth's face I noticed something.

'_Ice Cream_' was written across his forehead in a red marker.

_Thank god for my detective skills… I could have missed that one._

He smiled toothlessly at me and my eyes widened.

"You and your father will be the death of me." I groaned at Ellie as I grabbed her hand and led her to the steps. "Fifteen minutes." She frowned at me before sitting down and I went to go wipe Seth off. "Aww honey," I cooed as I wiped his forehead.

"_Hello_ my loves!" Alice's voice rang out, "…And Ellie." I rolled my eyes.

"Where is my little housewife?" She called, her heels clunked on the hardwood floors as she skipped around. I put Seth on my hip and met her in the door way of my kitchen. "Would you like to make me a sandwich?"

"That's why I don't voluntarily open the door for you, bitch." I looked over toward the stairs to see if Ellie had heard, she was leaning around the banister with her eyebrows raised and her hand out.

"Hey, I only speak the truth." I defended. Ellie shrugged and nodded before lowering her hand.

"I'm not going to be a 'housewife' for much longer… I'm going to go back to work… when I can." I defended. I didn't lie, at some point I would return. I was slightly reluctant to go back though. It would take me awhile to get into the swing of things. But I could do it.

_I'm Bella fucking Masen. _

_Sounded cooler when it was Swan…_

"You've been able to go back since before this one was born." She jerked a thumb at Seth

"Oh yeah, sorry I didn't want to attempt to kick ass while being five months pregnant. I'm going to go back…" I trailed off.

"Wow Bella, kind of early for him to be tatt-ing up wouldn't you say?" Alice asked as she ran her hand over Seth's forehead. He giggled as if he understood Alice and I chuckled with him.

"You're so damn domestic…" Alice said as she dropped her purse in my foyer and walked off. I stared at the coach knock off, before kicking it into the open closet door.

_The fuck?_

"Would you recommend that I work prostitution busts instead?" She rolled her eyes.

"You could pull it off. You got all curvy from having _chirens'_… Makes me want to have kids… Except for the whole delivery thing… I could kill you for having me in there for that…" She shuddered. She sat at the kitchen table and laid her head in her arms.

"Well you get to practice tonight, having kids." I mumbled. Her head shot up.

"What?"

"Edwards taking me to dinner, to celebrate something." Her head dropped to the table again.

"Bella, I've never had to care for a newborn before…"

"He's almost one, Alice." I said, Seth looked appropriately put out and I handed him to Alice. "Just don't press here." I pointed at his soft spots, "Support him here," I pointed at his butt to head, "And you'll be fine. Oh and feed them. _Both _of them. Don't forget about Ellie."

"Glad that you told me to feed them. I would have completely forgotten." She deadpanned.

"Ellie your time is up, pumpkin." I called, she squealed and ran into the kitchen.

"Whatever," Alice replied to my earlier comments. "Oh! I forgot to tell you! I found this movie and I swear this woman looks just like you." She produced a movie case from her purse and pointed at the cover, which showed a group of women lined up together, looking perfect.

_The Stepford Wives_

She pointed at one of the women, "Her. Oh… wait… no it was her." She pointed at another nameless face. "Or her. Hell all of them." She grinned cheekily at me before doubling over with laughter. I rolled my eyes.

"What's wrong with being… _domestic_?"

"Oh nothing… apart from the fact that you suck now." I kicked her under the table.

"I'm just kidding, Bell. I love you!" She apologized in her own way before kissing my cheek. Ellie crawled into my lap and I kissed her cheek.

"Aunt Alice, you look pretty today." She complemented, she sent me a look over her shoulder before whispering.

"Daddy said to kill her with kindness. She hasn't dropped yet though." A knock on the side door sounded and Ellie sprang up to answer it.

"Emmy!" She squealed then next thing I know she was lifted about six feet in the air.

"What's up, kid?" He asked happily before laying a kiss on her cheek. She and Emmett were closer that two humping pencils… minus the humping… She really bonded with him after Edward and I got married.

"Emmett what are you doin' here?" I said as I stood and kissed his cheek.

"You're bum husband sent me over to make sure one of them doesn't end up sleeping in the gutter." He said pointing at Alice and Ellie who were glaring at each other. I invited him to sit at the table before taking Seth from Alice.

"So what are you lovely ladies doing on this fine evening?"

"Alice was just reminding me of how much I suck." I grumbled.

"Suck what?" Emmett said squinting at me.

_Dumbass_.

"At life." Alice answered.

"Dick." I hissed sarcastically at the same time.

"Oh please, Belly here? Sucking? You're kidding. She's fucking awesome. She can take any asshole down in a minute." He said before reaching into his pocket and handing Ellie a wad of bills. "Alice meet the _shit_." He said pointing to her and then me.

"I don't know if I want to be called shit… That's not really a _compliment_ in my book."

"Oh please." Alice rolled her eyes, I glared at her.

"You wanna' see?" Emmett stood from his chair and made a big show of holding out his hand for me to take. And after passing Seth to Ellie I took it.

"I wanna' see!" Ellie squealed. "Hurt Alice first." Alice glared at her and followed Emmett and I into the living room. We stood in the middle of the room and Emmett grabbed me around my waist and neck. My foot hit the arch of his and he slightly hunched over, I elbowed him in the side and grabbed him around the neck before flipping him to the ground.

He landed with an 'oomph', "Sorry Em."

Ellie was screaming and cheering, "Yay! Her next!" She said as she pushed Alice up to me.

"Pick on someone your own size." Alice grumbled before backing up. She gently dropped Seth into his play pen and he frowned at her.

_Well that would make two of my kids that don't like her._

"So what's this big news Edward wants to tell me about?" I asked as I helped Emmett get back to his feet.

"He got a case and a promotion."

"What's the case about?"

"Edward and you would have to house someone who is being tracked down. It's a lot similar to what you two did in Forks except they'll be staying with you."

"And he took it?"

"Newton wanted it… But Edward was a persistent little fuck. I didn't want to give it to him you know… because of the new kid…" He jerked a thumb at Seth, "but he wanted it, so…" He shrugged.

_I was going to kick his ass._

"Just Edward?" If they brought that whore of his partner into my house I would be hanging dicks from my mantle.

"And, if need be, you too." I lifted an eyebrow. "Speaking of you helping out, when do you think you'll be rejoining?"

"I don't know, Em." I mumbled before picking up a discarded toy out of the floor and straightening up the couch.

"I never thought I would see the day when my hard ass little Bell would settle down." Emmett said as he watched me work.

"I've been settled down for two _years_ now Emmett. Where have you been?"

"You know what I mean… Leaving the life of a hard ass agent behind." I shrugged.

"I'm going to come back, despite what you two think; I'll be back with my fellow prostitutes in no time."

_That didn't come out right…_

Alice snickered into her hand and I through a teething ring at her, "Umm…" Emmett scratched his head.

"You know what I meant." I said mocking his earlier words. "I'll talk to Edward about it."

"You, my friend, are a fail to womankind." She said shaking her head. "He didn't talk to you about taking the case!" She raged, attempting to add fuel to the small flame.

"Well. This involves more than Edward, I'd have to take Seth to day care and whatnot." I mumbled, inwardly snorting at my dumbass excuse.

"Hell, I wouldn't have to ask Jasper to go back to work."

"You don't have kids."

"Grow some balls, Bella."

"Grow a brain, Alice."

"You can't grow a brain, smartness."

"Oh but you can grow balls?" I cocked my head to the side.

"Hey. There's surgery for that."

"One surgery between the two of us is enough."

"Ellie, you wanna' get ice cream?" Emmett asked offering her his hand, sensing the oncoming inappropriateness.

"Yes!" She squealed.

"No." I said sternly.

"Yeah Mommy, I think you should go back to work." She said heatedly before stomping out of the room.

"I don't want to go through the training again." I reluctantly replied.

_That shit was hard._

"What if I could get you just a refresher course. It'd be shorter. Come on… We need someone to hold down the office. I miss having you there to shut everyone up. The only chick there is Denali and she's so busy hoe'ing her way through the office that she doesn't really focus on _us men._"

"Sounds like she's focusing on you _men_, to me_._" Alice snipped from the couch.

"Hey, I won't go back to play 'Mommy' to you asses."

"Not _Mommy_, Bell. More like high school bully." He rubbed my shoulder like that shit was supposed to make me feel better.

"I can do that without being actually on the force again." I rolled my eyes.

"Emmett, how would I look if I randomly show up a year and a half after the completion of my probation and try to look like a hard ass when they all probably think I used my connections to get my badge back. No one will respect me if they think I had my Daddy and brother to get me back into the office."

"You will scare them no matter what they think." Emmett grabbed my hands and looked into my eyes, "You're a bitch. Connections or not." I narrowed my eyes at him.

"I hope you were referring to Charlie when you said Daddy."

_Only Alice._

"Of course I was. Edwards only Daddy in the bedroom." I said to Alice, she winked back at me.

"He's Daddy out here too." Ellie pitched in from behind the couch where Emmett and I sat.

"Oh shit!" I screamed, Emmett leaned forward and cradled his head.

"I think I'm going to be sick."

"You owe me a dollar."

"You owe for high blood pressure medication."

"What's that?"

"Don't worry about it."

"Are you doing dope, Mommy?"

Emmett hunched over in laughter and I gave her an exasperated look, "Only Aunt Alice does dope, Pumpkin. We've been over this." Ellie nodded and Alice looked appropriately offended.

"_Anyway_," Emmett sobered up, "The guys have respect for you anyway. How do you not respect a mother?"

"That's a bunch of shit. They will tip toe around me, like they did when I first joined. That's not respect."

"Hey, as long as they don't fuck with you."

"They wouldn't. Not with my brother, husband and father standing over my shoulder."

"Bella, the majority of them know that you can handle yourself. Edward working there won't make them consider you a soft ass."

"Ellie, wanna play hide and seek with me?" Alice asked as she watched Emmett hand her a dollar. Preparing to walk into my home was like preparing yourself to walk into a strip club.

"So that you can make me hide for an hour while you 'count'?" Ellie air quoted, giving her a dead look.

"Yes."

"Why would I do that?" She rolled her eyes.

"If you hide in the closet in your basement, I'll give you a dollar." Alice offered.

_Only the best Aunt would offer a deal like that._

"If I want a dollar I'll just wait another minute for one of you to cuss." She said in a 'duh' tone. Alice's jaw clenched.

"I don't know, Emmett…"

"How about you sit in for the meeting that clears Edward's case? It'll give you some time to get comfortable with the guys… and Tanya."

"Not Tanya. I would rip that bitches extensions out." I growled, before handing Ellie a dollar.

"Told you." She waved a stack of ones at Alice and rolled her eyes.

"Just come in tomorrow. Give Alice the kids and come in with Edward, the briefing is at nine." Emmett said like it was the simplest thing in the world.

"I don't know, Em."

"Just give it a shot." He pleaded.

"I think you should go, Mommy."

"Hey, if Ellie thinks it's the right thing. It's the right thing to do." Emmett said holding up his hands, "Come on."

"Ellie also thinks that aspiring to be a stripper is a good idea." Alice muttered from behind her magazine.

"Don't get me and your mother confused, Aunty Alice." Ellie smiled angelically at her.

"Don't you want to know about what's going to go on in your own home for the next few months?" Emmett asked.

"Of course I do." He gave me a look that clearly said 'then you know what to do'. "Alright fine. But if I end up beating the living fuck out of any of your jackass coworkers. It's going to be me and you Emmett."

He nodded eagerly .

"You know what pisses me off? Animals that talk… like on tv. I mean _what the fuck?_ Talk about not possible."

Ellie cocked her head and looked up at her, "Were you dropped on your head as a baby?"

…**TEC..**

**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**

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	3. Chapter 3

_**Thanks for all of your wonderful reviews! Much love to you all!**_

_**Thanks to:**____**Yummy dummy, Twifan1986, Juanita, dowlingnana, DenisseSchmidt, melissamary55, bearygirl, immortalwizardpirateelf –fan, luv2dance, kembie, vampirelove11 and Inserthilariousnamehere. Muchos Gracias!**_

_**Note: If the little chapter breaks say …TSC… As opposed to …TEC… please tell me. I originally named this Bella Swan: The Stepford Wife Contingency… But… um… I really thought that sucked… and I realized she was married so Swan didn't make sense… but yeah I'll try to change those…**_

_**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**_

…TEC…

"You ready, Bella?" Edward called as he slammed the front door. I laid Seth down and kissed his forehead gently smiling as he flipped over in his crib. "Baby where are you?" He called. I walked out of Seth's room and leaned over the banister.

"Hi, honey." I greeted sweetly. His mouth dropped open and his green eyes glinted with a hint of annoyance.

"What are you wearing?" He asked.

"A robe and you?" I smiled at him and he checked his watch.

"Hurry up and get dressed, Baby. Where are Emmett and Alice?"

"I sent them home."

"Why are you being difficult?" He asked, settling his hands on his hips.

"Why are you being an ass?" I countered. He shook his head and headed towards the steps I looked toward Ellie's room to see her standing in the doorway with her hand out. I went to her and gently pushed her back before closing the door, her hand was out the entire time. I pulled a dollar from my pocket and slid it under the door. I stocked up on one's earlier knowing that I would need it for this moment.

"What?" He asked from the top of the steps.

"I heard about your 'good news'. Are you really going to bring that shit into my home?"

"Our home? Yes." My eye twitched. I swear at some point I am going to conjure up a little shoulder buddy who can't talk me through Edward Masen speak.

_Como se llama… Como se llama... esta bonito… un cuchillo…_

_That's Spanish… and It didn't even fucking make sense!_

_I disagree._

_What's it mean then?_

_What is the name ... What is the name ... This beautiful ... a knife ..._

_No fucking sense…_

_Great I couldn't even make sense of my own fucking thoughts._

_It sounded good though, it rhymed._

"Baby, this could be good for all of us though! We could have more income, just for one person to live here for a while? Come on." He grabbed my hand and I shook my head.

"Edward. If someone comes to take him out do you think they'll have any qualms about taking one of the kids out?" He pulled me into him and hugged me tightly.

"That won't happen." I pushed him away.

"You don't know that."

"Please?" His eyes went from pleading to smoldering in about .03 seconds. "I'll sex you up," He said huskily.

"I don't know you like that." I said taking a note from Ellie.

"Come on, Baby…" I turned to go into our room and Edward followed me, once the bedroom door was shut he grabbed me around the waist pulling me firmly to his chest. "You're so sexy," he moaned in my ear as he undid the tie of my robe, slipping his large hands up my stomach to grope at my breasts.

"Edward, No." I said attempting to control my breathing. He rolled my nipples between his fingers and took the tip of my ear into his mouth.

"I love you." My head fell back against his shoulder and my pussy clenched.

_Must fight… the power… of sexy... husband…_

"If you don't stop touching me, I am going to break your fingers." His hand slipped down my chest and into my panties cupping my wet sex.

"Is it a man or a woman? The person st-statying here?"

"A man."

"Good. Because once I kill you, I'll need a new baby daddy." I said pulling his hand away from my heat.

"Bella…" he groaned, he checked his watch again and I sat on the bed, brushing my hair.

"It's my dick in a box!" Ellie sang from her room. Edward pinched the bridge of his nose before marching out of the room. I followed after him and heard his quiet mumbles and her giggling.

"That's not a bad word, silly."

"It is for you." He disagreed. He held her hands and she smiled sweetly up at him.

"Okay, sorry."

"You're fine." He grumbled, "Goodnight, honey. I love you." He said kissing her temple three times. She hugged his neck before lying down.

"Where did you even hear something like that, Ellie?" She shrugged and pointed at me.

"I didn't say it!" I argued.

"You were watching it." She crossed her arms over her chest and gave me a smug smile. Edward shot me a smile over his shoulder with a raised eyebrow.

"It was Saturday Night Live. Pervert." I rolled my eyes and heard him laugh as I left the room.

I sat down and picked up Edwards briefcase. Popping it open I reached in and pulled out a manila folder much like the one that contained Leah and Jacobs case two years ago. Written in the top left corner in pink pen was:

_**Tanya Denali**_

_**555-2868**_

With a tacky ass red kiss over the black writing.

_That cunt has been all over my fucking husband since we moved here._

I rolled my eyes and carefully opened the folder, making sure nothing fell out. Clipped to the top of the stack of papers was the picture of a handsome man with brown hair and a cute smile. He was almost Edward status. It was an over the shoulder picture that made me smile just looking at it. I unclipped the photo setting it on the bed next to me.

Volturi, Alec

Age: 25

Sex: Male

It said that he was the son of Aro Volturi. And heir to the Volturi fortune, which his father was murdered for only months prior.

_And he was going to be moving in with us in… how long?_

It wasn't wrong for me to be looking forward to having another piece of eye candy around the house… I am married after all. I can be professional. He was younger than me anyway… I mean a few years isn't all that much younger… The bedroom door open and I slammed the file shut. Why? I'm not sure. I wasn't technically doing anything wrong. Edward didn't even notice. He had his phone to his ear as he cancelled the dinner reservations.

His eyes met mine after I reopened the folder, scanning over his records, looking for any illegal activity on Alec's part.

"What are you doing?" He asked.

"Scouting out my new husband." Edward rolled his eyes and I sent him the bitch brow. "No, but seriously, he's being hunted?"

"Second richest man in the U.S." He nodded and I looked at his picture again. Next thing I know it was plucked from my hands.

"What are you doing?"

"This is confedential information." He didn't even take into account that all he was holding was Alec's picture. The open folder was still in my lap.

"So you don't care about my reading over this?" I gestured to the file in my lap and he shook his head slipping Alec's photo onto the dresser.

"Confedential, psh…" I rolled my eyes and closed the boy's file. "You know at some point he is going to be _living_ with us right?"

"I do."

"So… I'll be seeing him a lot."

"But you won't be molesting _him_."

"What?" I laughed.

"I know why you want this picture…. Infedelity is never the answer." He muttured sitting on the bed by my feet.

"Is that so?" I asked getting on my knees behind him and dangling the folder with Tanya's information on it, in front of his face.

"Come on again with this?" He said in exasperation. I smiled behind his back and wiggled the folder again. "She knows I'm not a blonde kind of guy." I chuckled and kissed his cheek.

"I prefer red-heads."

"Yeah, and I keep telling Jessy, that I'm into younger men." I spoke of the older gentleman that lived next door to us. "_Twenty-five_ is around the right age." I said in mock seriousness. Edward rolled his eyes and I pecked his lips.

"Is he going to be here for Thanksgiving?" It was next week after all.

"Yeah, he's actually going to be here on Monday." I pulled away from him.

"Well this is kind of short notice."

"Yeah we've been trying to decide who's going to house him since September."

"And I'm _just now_ hearing about it."

"That would appear to be correct."

"You're lucky theres no baby powder around, jackass."

"Love you too, honey."

I had never wished I could be fluent in Spanish more than I did in that moment. I would have loved to have cussed him out in _Espanol._ I slapped his back gently before burrowing under the covers. A while later the bed shifted and Edward spooned me.

"You wanna'-?" he grinded his hips on my ass and I kicked him.

"Guess that's a no."

…TEC…

"I think you should invite her." Edward said as we all worked to clean up the mess that was Ellie's room.

"She was funny, Mommy. We wouldn't even have to give her a room. She looked fine in the bathtub." Ellie… helped?

"I don't know if I want that kind of stress,I already have to cook for nine."

Edward counted on his fingers, "Me, you, Ellie, Seth- who doesn't even count-, Emmett, Rose," Rosalie was our ballistics specialist, she and Emmett officially met at the Hunter trial, where she testified against James and what she found in Leah's house after Jacobs kidnapping. She and Emmett had gotten married shortly after Seth was born and she was a bitch.

But then again, so am I.

We were as tight as the fiber in my diet.

"Alice-"

"Everytime… Why don't you people understand? I don't _like_ her." I shot her a look and Edward kept counting.

"Jasper, Charlie, and Alec. That's ten, Baby."

_Whoops forgot about Alec._

"Whatever, that's still a shit load of people. And add one more?"

"Just give her a call, she might not want to come." Edward passed the home phone to me and I frowned at him. I dialed Renee and held the phone to my ear.

"Hello?" She picked up on the third ring and her voice sounded crystal clear, no smokers cough or rasping or anything. She sounded much better than she had back in Forks.

"Mom?"

"Who Is this?" My cheeks heated up at the dumb question I had a bit of a short fuse when it came to her.

"Oh I'm sorry I wasn't aware that you had more than one daughter."

"Bella?"

"Yeah!" I said with fake enthusiasm.

"Hi, honey! How are you?"

"Fine, you sound good."

"Thanks… yeah I decided to stop smoking. I was beginning to sound like a chain-smoker." She giggled. It wasn't funny though…

_Because she was a chain-smoker._

"Mhmm… well what are you doing for Thanksgiving?"

"Coming down to see you, silly." I curled a lip and looked at Edward, who was tickling Ellie.

"Oh really?"

"Yep, Emmett said that I could come… I wasn't aware that you didn't know."

"Oh yeah, no… I knew." I lied. Emmett and I were going to have to play doctor later. Amputation clinic style.

"Well I'm excited to see everyone. How are Ellie and Edward?" I was beginning to wonder if she even knew of Seth… It'd be really awkward if I had forgoten to mention him.

"They're great, and so is Seth." I nodded throwing that out there. I winced as I was met with silence.

"Sorry, honey. I got distracted. Yeah he's going to be one soon, right?" I let out a relieved sigh.

"Yes, on Thanksgiving. He's getting so big, Mom."

Edwards eyes widened and he almost let Ellie hit the ground, he was tossing her in the air.

"Hey!" She squealed at the close call. "Eyes over here, buddy." She pointed to her eyes.

Renee babbled away through the phone and I covered the speaker, "You forgot didn't you?" He blushed and I through a flip flop at him.

"You two need to get cleaning." I ordered, Edward put Ellie on her feet before the both took off. "Damnit." I blew the hair out of my face and settled on listening to Renee again.

"Got married a few weeks ago…" She said slowly. I kept quiet and hoped that she would continue her thought."But it was just at the court house… And our neighbor…"

I ran a hand through my hair and palmed my face. "Congratulations?" I could practically hear her beaming through the phone.

"Thanks, honey. I met your obstetrician the other day. Nice woman."

"You met Esme? Why were you-"

_At the OB/GYN?_

"in Forks?" I asked.

"I came down to see you all. You moved…" I nodded.

"Yeah, I'm back in Portland now." I said awkwardly. I looked up to see Seth clumsily crawling towards me. "Hi, Honey," I cooed when he smiled and crawled up into my lap. "How'd you get out of your crib?"

"Dada…" He said adorably his little cheeks rising into a grin when I tapped his nose.

"Is that Seth?" Mom asked over the phone, she started to aww when he started calling my name.

"Yeah, apparently he's been talking for almost a week now."

"Isn't that precious? I remember when you said your first words… It's a magical moment isn't it?" She rubbed it in.

"Wouldn't know. I wasn't here and Edward was too busy watching football to call."

_Yeah still pissed about that one._

"Oh, I'm sorry honey." Seth tugged at my hair and twirled it around his fingers looking fascinated by the knotted mess he was creating.

"It's fine, as long as he's talking. Right pumpkin?" Renee giggled over the phone and Seth blew spit bubbles at me. I nodded and my eyes drifted to the clock on Ellie's nightstand.

"Mom, I have to go. But I'll talk to you later, okay?"

"Alright, bye honey."

"Bye." I clicked the phone off and darted towards my bedroom and then into the bathroom, stripping quickly and hopping into the shower.

"Bella?" Edward asked as he peered in at me washing my hair at super speed. "Where's the fire?"

"Don't worry about it." I said distractedly as I rinsed and washed the rest of my body.

"Baby, I have a meeting at nine… It's eight thirty. Can I join you?"

"Nope, I'll be out in a second."

"I just need to take a shower," He whined. I turned off the faucet and pulled my towel from over the door wrapping it around myself before stepping out. "What's your rush?" He asked as he caught me when I slid on my way out of the shower.

"I need to get ready for the briefing too, Edward." I said before rolling my eyes.

"What?"

"I need to-"

"Bella, you're not going to the briefing." He said squinting at me before chuckling.

I mirrored his expression, "Yes I am. It's my house he's staying in too." I said before patting his cheek.

"You can't just invite yourself to confidential meetings, Baby." He said to my back as I plugged in my blow dryer. I glared at my reflection in the large mirror, his words instantly pissing me off.

"I didn't just _invite myself_, Honey." I said through my teeth. "Emmett _asked _me to come. Thank you very much." He raised his hands in an 'I surrender' pose before turning the shower on.

"Just don't slow me down." He said while he stripped, my eye twitched and I ignored him as I blew out my hair. I hurried through my normal routine, rushing to get dressed in a pair of black slacks and a light blue, collared, button up. I twirled my hair up into a bun and slid on my aviators and heels.

Edward stepped out of the bathroom, leaning against the doorway while he buttoned up his cufflinks. "Look at my little cop." He smirked.

"Don't patronize me." I said sternly, "Ellie get ready to go to Alice's." I yelled to her, her groan could have been heard down the street. I hurriedly grabbed up Seth and changed his diaper before grabbing a diaper bag and heading down toward the car. Edward met me in the car and strapped both Seth and Ellie into their car seats. He looked stressed and ran his hands through his hair while he drove.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." He groaned as we pulled up to the Whitlock residence, Alice met us outside and collected the kids.

Edward was still tense as he sped to the station, "Seriously, what's up with you?" I asked putting my hand over his on the gear shift.

"We're going to be late…" He diverted.

"That's not it."

"I don't know, Baby. It's just going to be weird having you there. You know what I mean?" His eyes searched mine for a quick second before settling back on the road.

"Don't cry, Bella." I furrowed my brow.

_The hell?_

_I'm not a crier._

"I wasn't going to cry. If anything it should be weird for me having _you_ there. You, my friend, are the rookie. I'm an old timer." I said rolling my eyes. He huffed and stepped out of the car. He walked behind me on the way into the building.

"Come up here." I said slowing my walk. "Why are you walking behind me?"

_What? Was he ashamed of me or something?_

"Your ass looks amazing in those pants. You shouldn't have worn them, Baby… The guys-" He whined.

"If you don't shut up. These guys _know_ me. There is _no _way they'd stare at my ass. Calm yourself." I said with an eye roll. We both walked through the automatic doors and were greeted by Newton.

"Masen." He nodded tersely at Edward and then squinted at me, "Swan? What are you doing here?"

"Does it matter?" I asked cocking my head to the side. I never could stand him; there was always that one jackass in the office who got to touchy feely with the new girl. Every fucking time, it was Mike.

"Aren't you on probation or something?"

"Don't you have work to do or something?" I heard a strained groan and looked up at Edward, whose jaw was ticking.

"Don't be like that, Swan." He said holding his arms open, I brushed past him, grabbing onto Edwards hand.

"Need Mommy's help with the case, Masen? Cause you know I'm fully available to take the case, if you can't handle it." Newton shit talked, Edwards hand pulled out of mine and he spun on Mike.

"Newton don't forget who the fuck you're talking to because my wife is here, dick." Edward growled, Newton's eyes narrowed and he sat back down into a rolling chair that I hadn't even noticed before sliding back into his office.

"Swan!" A happy voice called, I looked over to Crowley who was visible through the glass windows, he swiftly glided around his and his partner's desk coming to stand in front of Edward and me. "Where you been?" He asked throwing his arm over my shoulder in a half hug. He had always been the older brother I had never had... If you skipped Emmett.

"Around. How about you, Crowely? How's the wife?" I asked, his lip curled slightly and I dropped it.

"She's fine. How about you? Heard you settled down with this ass." He joked before throwing a play punch at Edwards shoulder, Edward just smiled and threw one back.

"Yeah, hey, I have to go but we'll catch up later, okay?" He nodded before turning to his partner who was holding out a file for him. I got other various waves and greetings on the way to the conference room but had to ignore them seeing as it was nine thirty.

"Where the hell is Masen?" My father's voice growled, Edward groaned and I yanked open the door.

"Right here." I said before pulling out a chair and sitting, Edward sat next to me before apologizing for our lateness.

"No problem, Bro. We know how slow Bella is." Emmett said, before leaning back in his chair.

"Alright, since you two are so late we've missed our briefing time, I have to move onto the larger meeting with all of the people involved."

"How many are involved?" Edward bit his lip at my questioned and my eyes narrowed at Emmett.

"Not many, just about three extra people and the team. So that Alec has someone with him at all time."

"Who-" Emmett stood as did Charlie and they walked out in the middle of my question. "The fuck?" Edward stood and waited for me to stand before heading to the larger conference room, that was next to my old office, and Edward's new one.

_Apparently not everyone ran on Bella Standard Time._

We sat down in between Mike and Tanya.

"So Masen… The chief told us some interesting news earlier, when you were playing house this morning." Mike leaned across me and I growled.

"Newton, if you don't back the fuck up I'll be using your balls as my nightlight."

"Well look at Mommy here. Even your threats have become more PG." He smirked, I threw my elbow into his side and he bent over almost falling into my lap.

"I said back up. And call me Mommy, one more _time_." Edwards hand came to rest on my knee, in an attempt to calm me.

"Swan. Who would have thought you'd be back?" Tanya said from around Edward. I shrugged at her. "You look… okay. For two kids and all."

"And you still look just as plastic as the last time I saw you." She smiled and I was surprised her plastic ass face didn't break with the effort.

"Yep, well I get a good work out thanks to my partner here." She smiled as she laid a hand on Edwards shoulder.

Edwards hand tightened on my knee. "I'm sure."

_Bitch._

Emmett started up the meeting and all of our focus was focused on him as he went in depth about the upcoming case.

"You know, Swan I never thought you'd settle with a guy like Masen." Mike whispered in my ear while Em spoke, my eyes darted towards Edward who obviously hadn't heard any of what Mike said.

"Why's that?" I whispered back, I don't know why I engaged myself in conversations with this dumbass.

"Well… you could have had all this." He gestured down his body, "Yet you went and got knocked up by him."

"I see what your confusion is, Mike. You see… I never wanted _any_ of _that_." I said disgustedly gesturing to... all of _that._

"Mhm, that's what you say now that it's too late," He said stretching out and laying his arm on the back of my chair. My eyes widened, and I kicked him minutely. I looked to Edward who was looking over his file now, and whispering to Tanya. Mikes thumb rubbed along the back of my neck and he scooted his chair closer to mine.

"Well… As a wise man once said… Never say never." he whispered his mouth nearing my ear. I rested my hand on the back of his head tangling my fingers in his hair before yanking roughly on the blonde strands, pulling his face away from mine and causing a loud whimper to emit from his slimy mouth.

"Justin Bieber also said 'Imma tell you one time'," _Hey… Ellie was a belieber_. "Fucker. I _told_ you to back up." I growled, I looked up to see that the meeting had been stopped and all eyes were on me and Mike.

"Oh that's awkward." I whispered to myself. Edwards hand tightened on my knee, before sliding up about mid-thigh and Emmett winked at me from across the room; he murmured to Dad "She's back."

"I'm sorry. Continue." I said before nodding at him. Emmett started talking again and I rested my hand over Edwards, listening intently for the remainder of the meeting. When the meeting was adjourned I stood with Edward before looking around the room at all of the different faces. There was the usual team as well as three agents. This consisted of Tanya, Mike and Tyler. They would be the ones taking the shifts, which meant hanging around the house at night and when Edward wasn't at home.

_Please don't let me have to kill one of the jackasses._

…TEC…

_**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**_

_**Hey… This one was twice as long as previous chapters… you want to leave a review for that right?**_

_**Of course you do!**_

_**Leave me some reviews? They make my day and inspire me to get back into the groove of writing (or attempting to write) comedy after my rough week…**_

_**Lets try to get to forty-five? It's not a huge leap… but for some reason FF won't show my correct amount of reviews. *Grits teeth***_

_**In case you didn't realize, which I wouldn't have expected you to, Tanya's phone number was 555-2( c)8(u)6(n)8(t) haha I'm clever ;)**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Thanks to: Kgunter34, Yummy dummy, totes. mah. gotes, kembie, kelliekinz, cait, Twifan1986, dowlingnana, Mrz. JasperHale4Ever, DenisseSchmidt and Melnaugh.**_

_**It's great to see my old reviewers back! It makes my day to see all of your reviews in my inbox… seriously!**_

_**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**_

…TEC…

I groaned loudly before tossing in bed. I huffed before sitting up and glancing over at the clock.

_3:04_

_Motherfuck._

I looked over at Edwards sleeping face and pressed a kiss to his cheek before standing from the bed.

"Baby? Where you goin'?" Edward asked lifting his head sleepily.

"I don't know… maybe the kitchen?" He shook his head and sat up long enough to grab my wrist and pull me into bed with him.

"No…" He whined before attempting to pin me down next to him.

"Edward." I laughed softly as I wrestled with his arm. His arm tightened and he pulled me against his bare chest before tangling his legs with mine.

"_Wha_?" He slurred.

"Are you sleepy or drunk?" He grumbled in my ear in response and I struggled half-heartedly, reveling in the warm weight of is arm and the solid wall that was his chest.

"Go back to sleep, Honey."

"You."

"What?"

"Not without you… Shh…" He kissed my mouth before tucking me back into his chest and letting out a deep breath.

"You're too cute…" I mumbled against his chest.

"Baby, I'm not cute. I'm a man." He said as his hand snaked up my stomach and groped my chest.

"You're right. Not cute at all." I huffed before pushing his hand off of my breast; he squeezed it once more before releasing me. "Almost barbaric." I nuzzled into my neck and I patted his hair down.

"I love you." He murmured against my neck.

"I love you too."

"Since were both awake…" He slid his hand into my pants and cupped me, I rolled my eyes before turning the two of us so that I hovered above him. His bright ass smile was brilliant enough to be seen from space I'm sure.

"Fine, but you have to be quiet." I ordered before chancing a look at the door as my hand slipped under the waist band of his boxers and wrapped around his cock.

His breath hitched, "I need to be quiet? Oh please, you're one to talk. _Edward… oh god yesss… more._" He mocked, I tightened my hand around him before releasing him and pulling his boxer down to his ankles with his help. My eyes met his as I wrapped my mouth around his length before his head fell back. "Oh god, _Baby…_" he set a slow pace with his hand wrapped in my hair.

All of the sudden his hand was gone and the little bit of light that filtered in past the curtains was gone. He pushed my ass down, then his hand was back and instead of resetting his rhythm he held me in place. His voices rang out and sounded as strangled as I was with his _fucking dick_ in the back of my throat. I closed my eyes and focused on breathing through my nose.

_What the fuck is he doing?_

"Hi, honey."

_Um…?_

I pinched his leg, before attempting to move my head, his hand pushed my head down again and I gagged.

Ellie's voice was thick, from tears or sleep I couldn't tell. "Daddy-What's that, Daddy? Do you have to pee?" Edward cleared his throat.

_Lucky him._

_Oh my god, I'm going to barf…_

"No, why do you ask?"

"You keep pressing your pee-pee." Ellie said before yawning, her small weight cause the bed to shift just by my feet. I took a deep breath as Edward understandably became flaccid. I removed my mouth from him and slid up his body.

"Mommy?" She asked as my head popped out from under the comforter.

"Wh-what-" I coughed, my fucking throat _killed_, Edward snickered at my raspy voice and I slapped his stomach. "Why are you up?" Her bleary eyes looked at me curious look and I shrugged at her.

"What do you mean?"

_What?_

"I mean, it's three in the morning. Why are you awake?"

"Why are you awake, Mommy?"

"You shouldn't be up this early."

"Well this is a little hippopotamuses of you." She raised an eyebrow at me.

"You mean hippopotami." Edward corrected like a dumbass.

"No, she _means_ hypocritical. Why the _hell_ would she mean hippopotami? That didn't even make sense-" He covered my mouth and I bit him, he just kinked an eyebrow and winked at me. I narrowed my eyes at him, in return.

"Mommy, you owe me a dollar."

"I think I should stop paying you because it obviously isn't helping my issue. _And_ if we don't stop soon you're going to have enough money to buy a train ticket." They rolled their eyes at me.

Then Edward spoke, "I think a train ticket should be something you should consider, you know with-" he jerked a thumb at me and handed her a dollar from out of our nightstand. I slapped the back of his head.

"I've had enough to buy as train ticket for a while, silly. I'm actually saving up for a hotel room now. Daycare too, I can't just leave Seffy-pie with you people." She said before giggling, Edward laughed with her and I shook my head.

"Honey, why are you up? Were you crying?" She turned toward me and Edward started spastically moving, pulling his boxers up around his waist without her noticing.

"I had a bad dream…"

_Not my area of expertise._

"You wanna talk about it?" Edward asked and she nodded before crawling in between us and burrowing under his arm.

"Yeah. Daddy you were there…" She looked to him and then at me before waiving me off. "You weren't." I scoffed and turned my back on her in mock anger, "I'm sorry, Mommy."

"Then there was a lady and she looked like you Daddy, and you were next to her… No she looked like me. Because she was a girl… so… yeah me. Okay but you were both crying and Aunty was there, too. She was crying like you." Edwards eyebrows furrowed and she twisted her little hands into his shirt. "I wana' to hug her so bad, Daddy. I- I didn't get to."

"Do you want to visit Aunty, Honey? We can-"

"No, the other lady!" She said and tears welled up in her eyes.

"Don't cry honey…" I said as I massaged her knee.

"Come here honey. You know, I have dreams like that too." He said as Ellie scrambled her way into his lap, she wrapped her arms around his neck and they hugged each other tightly. I just sat next to their rocking bodies sympathetically but clueless as to what was going on.

"I don't thinks she's real, Daddy. But I want her." She cried, Edwards eyes welled up too before he shut them and held on to her tightly. I can't recall a moment where I had seen him cry before and it scared me. His watery eyes opened and meet mine.

"Bella will you get my wallet?" I nodded and moved over the two of them to pull it out of his nightstand. I handed his to him but remained quiet. He opened is, and flipped open a compartment, before single handedly pulling a picture out of the small slot. "Is this her?" He asked showing her the picture, she sniffled before looking over her shoulder at the wallet sized photograph.

She looked wide eyed at it and plucked it from his fingers before holding it closer to her face.

Her eyebrow furrowed, "She's real?" Edward's eyes squinted and he bit his lip before nodding.

"That's my mother, Ellie." He winced slightly as he said _my_. My hand found his and I squeezed it tightly. I had no idea Edward kept a picture of his mother in his wallet.

"Is that you?" She said holding the picture really close to his face, he nodded and a faint smile graced his lips as he looked at the photo nostalgically.

"You don't look old here." She said smiling.

"Yeah, that was taken when I was in high school."

"She's pretty." Ellie said as she stared at the picture again, her wide eyes roaming over it repeatedly. "Can I have it?" She asked clutching it to her chest again, Edward nodded.

"Come on, Pumpkin, get some sleep." I said as I stroked her hair. Edward shifted so that she rested on his chest as he lay down. He gently pushed her off of his chest, so that she lay between the two of us. I kissed her forehead before resting next to her. Edward grabbed my hand and entwined our hands, before resting them above Ellies head.

"I love you." I whispered as Ellie started to drift off.

"I love you too, baby." I used my free hand to wipe a tear that fell down his cheek before kissing our hands. I gently pulled the edge of the picture up to see Elizabeth. I then realized I had never seen her before, When I had full view of her face, I gasped. Edward and Ellie were her spitting image. She had large, bright green eyes that seemed to smile out from the picture, her slim nose brought attention to her high cheek bones and bow shaped lips. Her bronze hair fell in ringlets around her shoulders as she and Edward embraced. His diploma was clutched in his hands as they hugged.

Edwards hand tightened around mine and Ellie's arm flung its self over my torso and I kissed her head again before drifting off to sleep.

…TEC…

"Mommy! Somebodies at the door!" Ellie called from the bathroom.

"I'm going…" I grumbled as I passed the door.

"Oh my- how long have I been pooping I didn't even notice that!" I threw up a little in my mouth.

"Wash your hands when you're done. Oh, and keep your bathroom comments to yourself." I shivered.

"Kay!" She giggled happily

I picked Seth up and trampled down the steps skidding to a halt right before I hit the door. I yanked it open and was met with three big guys in black suits, who rivaled Emmett in height and width.

"Are you Mrs. Masen?"

"I am. Who are you?"

"We are the Volturi search team." The one in the middle spoke and the other two nodded behind him.

"Is that supposed to mean something to me?" I asked wincing as Seth yanked on my hair.

"We are going to need to search your house before Mr. Volturi comes to stay." He took a step toward the door and I leaned my hip against the doorway.

"Now, for a second there, I thought you guys were going to march on into my house without being invited in. But I know that can't be true because I would have to kick your asses."

"Look, lady, we were ordered to do this and you can't stop us. So excuse me. Don't be difficult." He said trying to squeeze in around me.

_Shit just got real._

"Let me see your badges because I am about one second away from shoving my foot up all of your asses. And for you?" I pointed at the one who had been speaking, I held up my fist. The men all stared at me unfazed and flipped open badges. The biggest one smirked at me.

"Something funny?" I asked, he was staring at my chest and I noticed Seth had pulled my shirt down revealing the top of my bra. "Oh you're professional." I sneered and he sneered back.

_I liked that one._

I heard Edward's footfalls and then his arm was around my waist pulling me aside and greeting the three dicks at the door.

"Please excuse my wife, I failed to let her know you were coming." Seth squealed in my arms and reached towards Edward. Edward spoke with the men a little bit more and stepped aside as they swept the house. He turned to look at me and cocked his head, before shaking it.

"What's wrong with you?"

"Oh I'm sorry. Were you going to wait four days to tell me they were coming?"

_Yeah… he wasn't going to live that first word thing down._

"Baby, regardless of whether or not you knew they were coming, you know who Alec Volturi is, and you should have just let them in." I rolled my eyes.

"You're cleaning up after them." I told him as I noticed the biggest guy spreading and shuffling through papers.

"Oh but that's what I have you here for, darling." I almost broke his nose. He should be lucky Seth was here. I stepped towards him and he cowered back. "Here," I said handing Seth to him. Seth grabbed Edward's nose and started to play with it, once Edward had a hold on him.

"Now, I'm going to ask you one more time. When. Is. Alec. Coming?" I said slowly.

"Monday." He said I searched his eyes and when I was satisfied that he wasn't bullshitting I nodded and went to find Ellie.

She was perched on the kitchen counter watching with wide eyes as the men checked around the large area.

"Um…? Who are you?" She asked her eyes following them around the room.

"We're friends of your Mothers." The big one answered.

"Is that so? I have a feeling that that's not true."

"And why is that?"

"She doesn't like people like you." That caught all of their attention and I hid around the corner, so I could hear her.

"What do you mean? What has your Mother done?" The other guy asked.

"What's your name, Bud?" She asked.

"Aro."

"Like the stick?"

"What?"

"You know the thing you shoot?"

"Sure."

"Oh…. Your mommy must have hated you."

"As much as yours hates you." He said smoothly. "Has your mother ever had a run in with the cops?"

You'd think the dumbasses would have done a background check on me…

"Yep, always. My uncle is a police. So is Daddy…"

_Oh I've had plenty of run-ins with Daddy._

"Anyone else?"

"Like who? Oh my other uncle! His name is Jasper. He sounds like a ghost, but he's _really_ pretty. You should meet him some time. Nice guy. I would advise you to stay away from the wifey though. _Crazy_..." She trailed off. I heard two simultaneous huffs.

"Any policemen that you don't know the names of, Honey?"

"Honey? I'm sorry I didn't realize we were married. Wait! We aren't. So get your mouth off that." She growled, there was a sigh and a snicker.

"Answer the question." He sighed again when she gave him a glare, "please? So run in's with police you don't have a relationship with?"

"Oh! Like the fuzz?" They must have nodded because she continued. "Him." She pointed to the officer standing next to Aro. "Oh and before we moved she got in trouble with the police, and then her and Aunty Alice got banneded from the Grocery Store."

"Anything else we should know about?"

"I don't know. You got a cookie?" I chuckled lowly and rolled my eyes.

"Sure."

"One day, Mommy came home and she and Daddy was all hurt… but I haven't seen any cookie yet… so…" I knew that 'so' it's the one that goes along with the outstretched hand and the upturned palm.

"I don't actually have one." The man chuckled there was another laugh and then the sound of Ellie's feet hitting the floor.

"Then I guess we're done here, gentleman." She strutted out of the room and ran into me, letting out a shriek.

"Oh lord!" She panted like an old woman. She rested her hands on her knees and breathed deeply. "You scared me." I smiled and pulled her into my arms peppering her face with kisses.

_My little mobster._

_Cute huh?_

"Bella, Baby. Tone down the crazy, will you?" Edward called from over the balcony. I sent him the bird and gave Ellie a dollar.

"Mrs. Masen?" One of the men called from the kitchen. I lead Ellie into the kitchen where the men sat at my table, I raised an eyebrow at them. "Would you like to elaborate on your daughters words?" The both had notepads and were looking mighty comfortable at my table.

_Jackasses._

"No."Their smug smiles dropped, "Have a nice day." I said turning and leaving the room.

…TEC…

_**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**_

_**Oh Ellie. Our little ball baster. *wipes tears***_

_**Reviewwww let's try and get to… sixty? Yes! YOU CAN DO IT!**_

_**I updated early… just in case you needed some more incentive to review… They make my day… Oh and I'll need some encouragement for the upcoming Monday :(**_

**If we get to seventy five reviews I will run repeatedly into a wall and then update when I recover from my self-inflicted injuries.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Wow… So the reason that you were provided with this update is because we reached seventy-five.**

**Ohmahgawdddddd *teen girl squeal***

**Thanks to: kembie, DenisseSchmidt, blue eyes lover, totes .mah. gotes, dr. meow1234, bearygirl, Yummy dummy, dazzleglo, molliegoodgolly, melissamary55, dowlingnana, Kgunter34, Mrz. JasperHale4Ever, Melnaugh, xShazzJammyKalsix (Thanks. I didn't run into a wall… I was in a public place, didn't want to make a scene ;)), crazy-chick-4life, luv2dance, kelliekinz, alc1002, kimbeh.**

**Much love to each and every one of you for your support!**

**Also I want to apologize for the FF fail. For everyone who author alerted me (there were ALOT) and didn't get the memo that this story was posted I am so sorry. That sucks and I didn't realize that you weren't getting updates until I went and posted a note on The June Cleaver Experience… So yeah… Sorry.**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies**

…TEC…

After two days of vigorous cleaning and interrogation, Alec showed up. I had been running around trying to fix shit up and there were a few loud raps on the door. I wiped Seth's cute little face and set him in the play pen in front of the television. I stood and brushed myself off before approaching the door. I made myself presentable for Alec. We all did, I wore khaki pants and a light blue button down shirt, my hair was pulled up and clamped at the back of my head.

I pulled the heavy door open to reveal a wall, of men. I looked up and I recognized the big one who's name I had learned was Caius.

"Oh and you're back." I said with disappointment.

"My sincerest apologies, ma'am. They insisted on escorting me up here." A soft voice said from behind the men. I stepped aside and so did the men in front of me, revealing the cuteness that was Alec Volturi. He looked exactly the same as he did in the picture and spoke with a faint British accent. I let out a soft giggle.

_I don't giggle. The fuck?_

He took my hand and lay a kiss on the back of it, "We must be at the wrong home. There is no way that you are the cop that is going to be watching over me." He sent me a smile and my heart shook in my chest.

He rendered me speechless.

"No, that'd be me. Get in the house, lover boy." Edward said from behind me, he wrapped an arm around my waist and I giggled again. "You think you can handle showing him around?" Edward asked sounding disgruntled. I nodded wordlessly.

"Bella will show you up to your room," Edward said moving his hand to the small of my back. Alec stepped into the house and looked around.

"You have a lovely home, Mrs. Masen." He said with that smile, I blushed and thanked him. Edward spoke over my head to the guards who had to come and search our home again.

Alec followed me up the stairs and glanced into the open doors as we passed by.

"You have children?"

"Two. Ellie, she's seven and Seth who is eleven months."

"Please don't take me as being forward but you look wonderful. I wouldn't have ever guessed you had just had a child." He said smoothly. I smiled and bit my lip.

"Thanks, um… your room is right here." He had what Edward used as a home office, except we were provided a bedroom set by the station, for our housing him.

"It's great, thank you."

_He was kinda' sweet for a rich boy._

"No problem." I heard our front door swing open and Alice's voice rang out through the house, pulling me from my Alec induced haze.

_Which was wrong. _

_Because I'm married._

_Married._

_For real this time._

"Excuse me." He nodded and stepped out of the doorway, letting me pass so that I could speak to my dumbass of a best friend before she said something stupid.

"What are you doing here?" I questioned as I descended the steps.

"Can't I come check out the man candy that is Alec Volturi?" I lunged at her and covered her mouth.

"You aren't supposed to know about that. His people are here." I whispered. She looked around her eyes widening before she licked my hand.

I yanked my hand back and grunted, "You taste good, Bella." Alice said smacking her lips together, "Like chocolate." I curled a lip at her. Alec appeared in the part hallway that was railed off, and completely in view of the door. He descended the stairs completely unaware of Alice and I standing at the bottom in awe. Out of nowhere a yellow light hit him and _Hot in Here_ by Nelly started playing. A gust of air his him and his jacket blew open as he strutted down the steps.

_Okay, not really._

That's how it felt though. Alice was halfway leaning against me and when I tore my eyes away from Alec I noticed her mouth was hanging open.

_See what I mean? He's just that gorgeous._

It took me about a minute to notice that he had been standing directly in front of us. He snapped in front of our faces and Alice straightened up.

"Mrs. Masen?" He questioned, Alice sighed and elbowed me.

I pulled out of the trance and stood erect, "Yeah?"

"Where is your kitchen?"

"I'll take you to it." Alice volunteered looping her arm through his. "I'm Alice." She smirked and winked at him. He chuckled at her and went along with her.

I turned and dropped my head against the wall.

"Bella?" Edward said with a raised eyebrow, I stood up straight and tossed him a look over my shoulder. "Are you okay?" He wrapped his arms around my waist and laid his head against my shoulder.

I sighed heavily, "I'm fine." I mumbled before kissing his cheek. "I love you." He pulled away quickly.

"What did you do?" I looked into his eyes.

"I didn't do anything." _Technically._ "Am I not allowed to love you?" He gave me a weird look before accepting my invitation for a hug. His hands moved from my back to grab my ass and pulled our bodies flush together before kissing me deeply. I threaded my hands into his hair and he smiled against my lips.

A throat cleared, and Alice whooped at us. I pulled back from Edward to see Alec and Alice watching our display. Edward knew they were there.

_Jackass._

I pulled away from him just in time for Alec's bodyguards or whatever the fuck they are called to round the corner. One of the men handed him a folder full of shit.

"From now on, you are Riley Masen. Edward's brother." The guy jerked a thumb at Edward. They could be brothers… they were both fuck hot.

_Edward more so though…_

_But hey. I'm fucking _him.

Edward had tucked me under his arm so I slipped my hand into Edwards back pocket and squeezed his ass. He had a great ass.

_Mmmm…_

I palmed it and he jumped a little bit. Alice caught the movement and chuckled lightly behind Aro's back. Aro turned and gave her the bitch brow and she sent one right back.

"Will you all not be around?" _Riley_ asked, the man shook his head.

"That's why you'll need to stay with Edward… or if need be, Bella."

"Bella?" He asked pointing at me; I gave a shy wave and swooned at my name on his lips.

_I swooned guiltily though._

And then I grabbed Edward's ass again.

"You have to stop, Bella." Edward hissed and I looked up at the frustrated look on his face before down at the bulge that was his crotch. I instantly got wet and had to refrain from humping his leg.

"Yes, Isabella on leave from the department but she too was an agent. I believe she is fully capable of taking care of you." Aro confirmed, raising an eyebrow at me as he flaunted the fact that he had obviously done a background check on me.

_Insert mind into gutter…_

Edward held his arm up and looked down at his cell phone. "It's three, Bella." I nodded before making my way towards the coat closet.

"Alice? You coming?"

"Not yet." She replied still clinging to _Riley's_ arm and staring up at him dreamily. He smirked down at her and I grabbed her arm on my way out of the door that everyone was congregated in front of.

"Oh wow…" She sighed. We slid into the car and took off towards Ellie's school.

"You're married, whore." I grunted.

"Jealous?" She asked sassily, I rolled my eyes.

"Yes, so jealous. Seeing as I've been married to a figment of my imagination for what? Almost two years now?" I bit.

"You, Isabella. Are jealous because I got to _touch _him." I gave her a sarcastic look.

"I think Jasper would be the jealous one, Ali." Her eyes widened and she sunk back into her seat.

"I forgot." I rolled my eyes again and pulled into a parking space. The kids were just being let out and the playground was a mess. There were children everywhere and teachers attempting to calm them while sending them off in separate directions towards their parents. I jumped out of the car and hurried towards where Ellie stood with her teacher Mr. Yorkie. I tell you, I have never met a bigger dick sickle in my life. When Ellie saw me she darted towards me before jumping into my arms.

"Hi, Mommy!" She squealed hugging me tightly around my neck. I set her down before taking her hand.

"Great and you?" I waved towards her teacher, Mr. Yorkie, who just nodded at me before checking me out; I curled a lip at the bastard before hurrying Ellie away. Suddenly Ellie stopped in her tracks her abrupt movement jostling me.

"What's wrong, Honey?"

"I have a question." She said her eyes glaring at the car.

"What's up?"

"Are you and _aunt_" she stressed the word with a doubtful look, "Alice _more_…?" I waited for the rest but she just gazed up at me curiously.

"More what?" Ellie ran a hand through her hair, looking so much like Edward and huffed.

"Are you two lepians?" She said bluntly.

"…Lesbians?" I asked, she nodded and I shook my head furiously.

"You should probably tell her that." She sniped, before walking off.

"Ellie, what are you talking about?" I caught up to her and grabbed her back pack before turning her and kneeling in front of her.

"If you are cheating on my Daddy, I would appreciate the truth." She said stomping her foot, I couldn't help but chuckle at her.

"I would never do that to you guys, honey. Much less with Alice… I mean… look at her." She looked over at the car to see Alice winking at herself in the mirror. Not once but multiple times, it looked like her eye was having spasms. Ellie turned back to me her face scrunched up adorably.

"I would hope not with Alice, you can do so much better, Mommy." She said seriously putting her hands on my shoulders. I chuckled and pulled her to my chest hugging the crap out of her.

"What would make you think that?"

"She's always around."

"Well… so is Uncle Emmett."

"He's your brother. She's not."

"How do you even know what a lesbian is?"

"Bailey's Mom's are lesbians."

"And when she told you about being lesbians you thought of me and your _aunt_?"

"She isn't though. She is always with you… I don't know."

"I-"

_I'm 100% pole. Not hole._

"I love Daddy. Okay?" She nodded and hugged my neck. "I love you, kid." I said standing

"Love you too, Mommy." She said after pulling away and tapping my nose.

…TEC…

"Well, _hello_." Ellie said as she walked into the kitchen to see Edward and _Riley_ talking. Her voice deepened dramatically as she sauntered up to Alec sticking out a hand.

"I'm _Elizabeth_, and you are?" Her voice change made her sound more like a transvestite than anything nearing attractive.

"Riley. Pleasure to meet you, cutie." He took her hand and kissed it. Her cheeks turned red and she covered her mouth before giggling and letting out an unattractive snort. I had pulled out the chair next to an unhappy Edward to watch the scene. I laid my hand on Edwards lap, a little closer to the apex of his thigh than what could be considered casual. He stiffened and I massaged the muscle there.

"What's up with you today?" He hissed, his hand covered mine and he pushed it away. I gave him the stink eye and he turned back to watch Riley and _Elizabeth_ converse.

"Do you all want anything to drink?" I asked standing from the table my question went ignored by Edward and Ellie but Alec looked up and met my eyes before shaking his head.

"No thank you, Mrs. Masen." I nodded.

"Please, call me Bella." I requested, Edward snorted and I smacked the back of his head. "Something funny, Edward?"

"Not at all, _Bella_." Alec's eyes moved between Edward and me before he stood from the table.

"Excuse me, I should be unpacking." He nodded at me before leaving us in awkward silence.

"He's beautiful." Ellie said resting her elbows on the table, and laying her face in her palms.

"Don't you have homework to do?" He asked irately, she nodded still on her Alec high and pulled a work sheet out of her back pack. Edward pushed away from the table and stalked out of the room.

"What crawled up his butt?" Ellie asked as we watched him leave. I just shrugged and offered up help, for her homework and when she turned me down, I started on dinner.

After putting chicken into the oven to bake I headed up the stairs after Edward. On the way I passed by Seth's room and saw that he was passed out in his playpen surrounded by plush toys, I gently moved him into his crib before closing his door and continuing on my mission. Alec's door opened and he poked his head out before catching my wrist gently as I passed.

"Bella, please accept my apology," my brow furrowed and he went on, "I don't mean to cause any issues between you and your husband."

I shook my head, "It's not you, and he's just being a jackass today. You're fine." I assured before patting his hand that was wrapped around my wrist. He released me and stepped back into his room. I hurried towards our bedroom door which was wide open. From the door way I could see Edward fuming on the bed with Alec's file in his lap. He didn't look up at me when I entered nor did her acknowledge me when I sat next to him on the bed.

"Hey. What's your issue?" I nudged his shoulder and he ignored me. "Don't ... don't do that, it's petty." He dropped the folder and looked at me with a vacant expression.

"You already know what my fucking problem is apparently. You said yourself that I'm a jackass." He said giving me a bored look.

I pouted at him apathetically, "But you knew that, Baby." I was expecting him to chuckle or at least smile and I was met with neither. "I'm kidding. Seriously though, what's wrong?"

He let out a heavy sigh and I grabbed his hand and placed it on top of my breast.

"Is it sex that you want?" I started to unbutton my shirt and he shook his head before stopping my hands. I looked up to see him smiling that cute crooked smile of his.

"What is it then?" I asked, exasperated.

"I want you to stop... whatever it is you're doing with Riley." His smile was completely gone, covered by a mask of seriousness.

"What?" I said pulling away from him to look him in the eye. "Edward, I'm not doing anything with Riley."

"The flirting ... '_call me Bella_'." He mocked in a high pitch that sounded nothing like me. "And the giggling! What was that?" I shrugged and he shook his head.

"If you want the truth the boy is _smoking_. But that doesn't mean anything, Honey." Edward scowled at my admission, "because I love you and if you don't mind my saying you're sexy as hell... you're sexy as hell. I'm team Edward, Baby." He smirked at me and I leaned over to kiss him.

"I love you." He whispered against my lips before grabbing onto my ass and pulling me to straddle his lap. His hands drifted up my chest and as soon as he was about to grope my breasts…

"Ma-ma!" Seth's voice squeaked through the baby monitor right next to my ear. I launched backwards and would have fallen off of the bed had Edward not grabbed my waist.

"Later." I muttered placing another quick kiss on his lips before getting up to see what Seth needed. Who would have thought the kid would sleep the day away and wake up right before Mommy could get it in?

"What's up?" I asked rhetorically as I approached the crib. His little voice squealed with happiness when I picked him up and he started tugging at my shirt over my breast.

"Ah... you didn't want Daddy touching what was yours did you?" He smiled up at me and I sat in the rocking chair before opening up my shirt and offering Seth's awaiting mouth the Ta-ta buffet. He easily latched on and drank greedily from me. I rocked us slowly back and forth before kissing his soft hair. After drinking his body weight in breast milk, I laid Seth in his crib and had begun to button my shirt when Alec came in.

"Bella, something's burning and ..." he trailed off, his eyes glued to my naked chest. After a few seconds of frozen embarrassment I snatched my shirt up, holding it closed and _Riley_ covered his eyes apologizing profusely. Edward popped up behind _Riley_ and jealousy shone in his eyes, he blinked a few times before clearing his throat angrily. _Riley_ spun around and I could tell be his stance that he wished he was dead. I took the time to button up my shirt hastily before making my way to the door. I laid a hand on Alec's shoulder in empathy before sliding past him and wrapping an arm around Edwards waist nudging him to move toward the stairs.

I shook my head. "God... you act like you two have never seen a pair of tits before."

…TEC…

**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**

**What do you all think about **_**Riley**_**?**

**I still can't get over reaching the goal for last chapter *vibrates***

**Let's try and get to 100, for an update tomorrow!**

**And before I go… I there will be a reappearance of someone from Bella Swan: The June Cleaver Experience. Who would you all like to see? Please leave their name in a review! It won't be James though…. So don't request him please? TANX**

**Here are the choices:**

**Leah**

**Jacob**

**Dr. Facinelli **

**Esme Facinelli**

**One of Edward's students from Forks High**

**Ms. Isabella**

**And if there is someone not on the list that you'd like to see leave their name in a review!**

**(Obviously someone who isn't already in the story… thanks)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Wow you ladies are running me dry! Thanks for all of the reviews.**

**Thanks to: Jaj1009, Yummy dummy, luv2dance, totes .mah .gotes, heartbrokentears, alc1002, vampirelove11, Pianogirl05, ccc, melissamary55, DenisseSchmidt, dazzleglo, sOulOv3, kembie, Simonatwilight, dr .meow1234, Kris x33, ohayllno, envyislandgurl, Melnaugh, kelliekinz, Twifan1986, dowlingnana, and AliceLovesEmmett.**

**Just for clarification:**

**Ellie is now seven! She was five in the last story **

_**Riley**_** is Alec Volturi's new name. The do flip flop between calling him Alec and Riley in their thoughts…. But that's the same person!**

**Standard disclaimer applies**

…TEC…

I rolled my eyes as Edward went on and on about Alec seeing my breasts. They were mine and that whole debacle wasn't that big of a deal to me. Yet he couldn't let it go.

I turned on my side and pulled our heavy duvet over my shivering body. Usually Edward was enough to keep me warm, but do to his anger towards the whole Alec thing he was pacing instead of warming. I closed my eyes but wasn't able to be dragged into unconsciousness due to his ramblings.

"It took me what? Two months to see them then- first day- and you're whipping out the big guns." I clenched my teeth and rolled my eyes. Another shiver rocked through me.

_Was it always this fucking cold?_

"Then he comes in and charms the pants off of every fucking woman in the vicinity. Even my daughter! And wife… thank god Seth doesn't have a vagina or I'd be completely alone. Unless Riley turns him gay. Hell what if he turns me gay!" He looked at me with wide eyes and I huffed and sat up in bed holding my arms out to him.

"Come here." I whispered groggily, I had been up since forever making last minute adjustments before Alec got here. Edward shook his head and continued to pace and ramble.

"Baby either shut the hell up, or get into bed. If you wake Ellie or Seth I'll be sleeping with Riley tonight." I joked.

_Apparently it was too soon…_

Edward gave me the most heartbroken look that I had ever seen on a man before crawling into bed with me. He turned away from me and hit the lights, I immediately felt bad. I scooted over behind him and spooned him, which was awkward as fuck seeing as he was a foot taller than me. But it was okay, I'd play big spoon for the night. I buried my head in between his neck and shoulder, laying a kiss there before yawning.

"I was kidding," I said quietly he nodded and readjusted himself on the pillow, otherwise ignoring my words. I pulled away from him and turned so that my back faced his and when I started to drift off to sleep I registered his hand laying on my stomach and his body cupping mine.

"Mine." He said groping at my breasts, I sleepily nodded and went under.

…TEC…

That whole staying asleep thing didn't seem to want to stick because when I woke up and looked over at the clock the little green numbers glowed 3:01.I hoped this wasn't going to become a fucking habit. I made to scoot away from Edward but I was halted in my motions when his hands tightened on my chest.

He fell asleep groping my breasts.

Classy.

I gently pried his fingers off of me and stood from the bed. I took a second to marvel at the beauty that was my husband. He slept shirtless, always. His abs and toned for arms flexed as they moved around, obviously noting my absence. His pajama pants were low slung and his happy trail accented his hip bones. My eyes trailed back up to his sleeping face, his red lips opened just a little bit and his eyelids were mostly closed but not all the way which freaked the shit out of me. The moonlight glinted off of his sexiness and I leaned over, pressing a kiss to his shoulder.

I snatched up the baby monitor and my robe before creeping down the steps. When I made it to the bottom I tripped and fell into a shadowy figure that caught me. My mouth opened to produce a scream but my mouth was covered.

As soon as I went to tear the persons shit up, a voice whispered in my ear, "Shh... Calm down, it's me." Alec said softly my body slumped against his, before I realized what was going on and pulled out of his intimate embrace. In my struggle I had managed to drop the baby monitor.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I tried to calm my nerves.

"Couldn't sleep."

"So you waited by the steps?" I asked giving him a weird look.

"I was about to go back up, but now that I have company, I think I'll stick with you." He winked and I smiled at him.

We both headed to the kitchen and shit-chatted about nothing until he brought up Edward.

"What's up with him? If you don't mind me asking…"

"I think he's jealous to have all the women he's been around start swooning over handsome young men." I said honestly.

"All of the women?" I nodded, "Even you?" I bit my lip.

"Alec…"

"Please call me, _Riley_, gorgeous." He smirked and winked at me, leaning closer to me from over the island. "If I had a wife as beautiful as you I would make sure she stayed away from other men too." He grabbed my hand again before placing a kiss on my palm. I jerked my hand away and stared at the yogurt I had recently retrieved before looking back into his eyes.

"Riley, this is highly inappropriate. I don't think my husband would appreciate this." He stood and came around the side of the counter where I was standing.

"I wouldn't expect him to," He looked at the counter and chuckled softly.

"Oh and then there's Ellie! She'd be pretty upset with you."

"She's young. She'll get over it." He winked and grabbed for my waist, I skillfully dodged his hands.

"Yeah so I'll be leaving…" I said backing away from him.

"Wait! Stay. I promise I won't try anything funny," I gave him a skeptical look before following him over to the table and sitting across from him.

"Fine. I'll stay but I'm serious," he nodded in agreement.

"Um….."

_Got to love a conversationalist._

"How's the weather?"

_I swear. I almost punched him._

_He didn't even see it coming._

"Really? If you wanna know how the weather is then watch the news. Are you new at this?"

"I don't know, I'm not really used to meeting new people." he explained. "It's a lonely existence."

_The fuck? Existence?_

"Well just ask questions and we can start that way."

"Are you seeing someone?" I gave him the bitch brow. "I'm kidding, promise, but I do want to know when you got started with all this super-secret kick ass spy stuff."

"First it's not a bed time story, don't make it sound like one, and I started when I was twenty. My father and brother are both cops… family thing I guess."

"Sorry, that's kind of cool, so you can shoot a gun and you have a Taser?"

"Exactly."

"Hot-I mean- sorry, I didn't mean for that to come out." He blushed.

_God… how can I be mad when he is so cute…_

_You have a husband._

"It's okay, a part of me is wondering if you've even been around a girl for this long." I blurted.

He laughed and explained he really never had time for friends, he was always busy. It seemed like he was deprived of a lot of things starting from his childhood. He only had two reall Christmases and he was very shy so he wasn't good with talking, I kind of figured that though. He did mention that, before now, he had never had any trouble with the ladies. And to which I replied that I was sure the other girls weren't married.

Over the next several nights we got up and sat at the kitchen table and talked, about things we like and dislike, funny things, things that we wish would go away, because it was so embarrassing for me.

"So it's Seth Birthday tomorrow what did you get him?" Riley asked turning a coffee mug in his hands.

"Edward and I got him a little music play set, he loves the piano we have in the family room, so we got him a smaller version. Ellie made him a scrapbook."

"He's adorable, He looks exactly like Edward… No homo?" He asked.

"Yeah."

"And Ellie, she scares me… but I she is a pretty amazing hustler."

"You got that right, I probably lost $200 and 2500 cookies because of that girl," we laughed together. "But yeah she is amazing."

"I guess she gets it from her mom."

"The scary, or the amazing part."

He chuckled "The amazing part, but you can be pretty scary too."

"I've been told that."

"So you and Edward have been married for two years and you have two children. And you both work, a lot." He stated randomly.

"Well he does for now, I'll go back when Seth is a little older, and I lose some more of this baby weight." I half joked, half lied, awkwardly. I hated these situations, I was constantly asked about going back… but after handling children all day for two years… I don't think I'll ever be ready to go back.

"I think you look beau-" He looked over my shoulder and froze.

"What?" I turned around, startled to see Edward standing in the doorway. "Go ahead say it, just act like I I'm not here." His arms were folded over his chest and he looked… intimidating.

"Edward-"

"Bella." Edward commanded, I kinked an eyebrow.

"I'm so sorry. I was just saying that she is beautiful; and doesn't need to lose weight." Alec said boldly, I gave him a 'shut up' look.

"Well that's my job, kid. So back the fuck off," He growled, his eyes met mine in an intense gaze, his green gaze glowed with jealousy and hurt. He spun on his heal before stalking out of the room.

Alec cleared his throat.

"So, Bella…" I looked up. "You're beautiful and you don't need to lose weight, in my opinion." He said, awkwardly picking up where the conversation was interrupted. I got up from the table and hugged him, as he stood too.

"Thanks, Riley." He smiled charmingly at me and I bit my lip. "Um… So-" I went to take a seat and his hand stopped me.

"I think we should be getting off to bed, Edward doesn't seem too happy with this." I rolled my eyes.

_Edward was acting like a jackass._

"Can't be a people pleaser, Kid." I said before plopping into my chair, he sat down slowly.

"I don't know, Bella…" He said before squirming in his seat. He abruptly shot up out of his seat, "I am going to bed. You go upstairs and help your husband cool his jets. Goodnight." He rushed out, before leaving hastily. I sighed before setting my cup in the sink and slowly making my way to the bed room. Edward was sitting in the bed fiddling with his hands and when I entered he didn't acknowledge me. I rolled my eyes and slipped back in next to him.

"Why are you being so immature?" I asked angrily. "The fuck? That's your job? When was the _last _time you complimented me?"

"Oh please." He said rolling his eyes. "He was fucking hitting on you." I laughed humorlessly.

"You have got to be kidding me…"

"You know what? It doesn't even matter. Why don't you go tell _Riley_ about how big of a jackass I am?" He pulled the duvet over his legs.

"Is that why you upset? Because I called you a jackass? Baby…" He gave me an incredulous look as I placed my hand on his cheek.

He batted my hand away, "No. What upsets me is that you're up in the middle of the night getting cozy with this kid."

"Getting cozy? We were talking from _across a table!_ Am I not allowed to _speak_ to any other men?" Edwards hand went up and he turned off the bed side lamp before shifting until his body was completely vertical and he continued to ignore me. I glared at the back of his head, in the dark, before scooting down behind him and turning so our backs faced each other.

"Happy Thanksgiving, Jackass._"_

…TEC…

**I hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**

**Okay if we make it to one hundred and fifty five reviews… I'll update again tomorrow.**

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**Much love!**


	7. Chapter 7

_**I am well aware that last chapter wasn't you all's favorite, per say. All of that drama and pettiness won't last long though, I promise! Also there won't be cheating in this… so yeah.**_

_**Thanks to: aviator gal, molliegoodgolly, kembie, Yummy dummy, dowlingnana, iloveChiodosXD, melissamary55, Kgunter34, Music ADD, Pianogirl05, dr .meow1234, clickchick18, Cockerspanmom, kelliekinz, dazzleglo, Melnaugh, luv2dance, totes .mah .gotes, alc1002, DenisseSchmidt, steph A15, and Karen.**_

_**You all are just lovely and your taking the time to review means the world to me! Your reviews were so funny! They were along the lines of "Gah… Edwards whining is annoying…" to "Bella shouldn't have done that…" to "aww I love Whiny Edward /3 too cute!" And some of them had all of that in there! Haha thanks ladies!**_

_**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**_

…TEC…

I woke up the next morning swaddled in Edward's strong arms with my head tucked into the crook of his neck. I nuzzled the slight scruff there before realizing that this wasn't the position we had fallen asleep in. I shifted a little bit closer to him knowing that I wouldn't get the chance to when he was awake.

_Fuck being pissed. _

I ran my thumb gently over the contours of his abs. his legs started to shift between my own and I frowned at the signs of him waking up. I pressed against him tighter and closed my eyes pretending to sleep longer. I heard his heavy sigh before he gently kissed my head, as a reflex. His lips froze on my scalp as the memories flooded back to him. His body stiffened and my heart dropped. He gently started to move, untangling his legs first before easing his body away. Leaving my head to drop to the warm pillow. He quietly left the room and I sat up.

_Alone_.

…TEC…

"Why do I have to get dressed up?"

"Because it's thanksgiving, Ellie."

"So?"

"So… everyone else will look nice."

"I don't give into peer pressure."

"No, but you give into Mommy pressure."

"But I don't have to look nice when I see them other days."

I rolled my eyes, "Don't you want Riley to think you look pretty?"

"Of course. But I could do that in my pajamas, I mean… I'm beautiful." I shook my head and finished curling the ends of her hair.

"… What about your grandma?"

"Who?"

"Grandma… My mommy." I slightly cringed at the words and she shrugged.

"I don't know her like that, though."

"So?"

"So… don't you want to make a good impression?"

"I do that naturally with my stunning personality." She gloated.

_Stunning, as in stun gun stunning._

"_Right_." She smiled up at me before giggling at herself.

She looked into my room and gasped before pulling away from the iron. "Why doesn't Daddy have to dress up?" She pointed at him.

I looked at Edward who shook his head, "That's up to him." He was still acting like a jackass about Alec and I talking at night. Giving me the silent treatment…

_It was like an early present._

_Lies._

"Daddy, tell her I don't have to dress up, please?"

"I'm going to get dressed, Ellie. Dinner is about an hour away though." He said avoiding her pleading and essentially avoiding talking to me as well.

Ellie frowned before coming back to sit at the mirror. I watched Edward move around the room for a while before giving Ellie my full attention.

Her eyes met mine in the mirror, "If you want him to know that you still like him, you should punch him."

"I'm good." I said while finishing up her hair. "In second grade that's cute… when you're my age-"

"Old." She cut in, Edwards quiet chuckle rang out and made me smile.

"-it's assault." I finished giving her the bitch brow, which she returned easily.

"Who's coming to dinner?" She asked while she fiddled under my hands.

"Grandma, uh…_Phil?_"

_He was only like three years older than me… could he be called grandpa?_

"Alice-" she groaned, "Jasper-" she smiled, "Emmett, Rosie, Riley, Grandpa and… that's it, I think."

"Next time can you assault me when making up the guest list?"

"What?"

"Insult me?"

"Okay… you-"

"No! Unsult…?" She put her hand to her chin as she thought.

"Consult, honey." Edward pitched in.

"Consult me, cause' I don't like… _half_ of those people."

"Alice is not half."

"My dislike for her makes up for all my like of everyone else." I squinted and thought over that sentence.

"You like Alice and you know it." Edward said from our room.

"I do not."

"Why?" I asked.

"Uh uh. You can't double team me like that. I need a partner!" Alice popped up behind Edward and I screamed.

"Where the fuck did you come from?" I asked. When I say popped up, I don't mean walked up, I mean she was just there out of nowhere. Edward's eyes widened as he thought I was talking to him. Alice smirked at me and let Edward answer.

"My mother's uterus." He said looking at me like I had lost my mind.

_At least he was talking to me._

"Couldn't have said it better myself." Alice said before flouncing out from behind Edward. He jumped away from her and screamed so femininely I was waiting for him to sprout tits.

Alice ignored him and walked around his panting body to enter into the bathroom.

"Creepy whore." Ellie said quietly. I popped her on the shoulder and shook my head at her. Alice perched herself on the counter.

"I'll be your partner!" She said smiling at Ellie. Ellie gave her a just a bright but sarcastic smile.

"Okay." She smiled sinisterly in the mirror.

"What are we arguing about?"

"Why I don't like you." Ellie answered easily.

Alice rolled her eyes, "That's easy because you're a-" I shot Alice a look and she sighed before finishing her sentence slowly, "_crackhead_…" There was a knock on our bedroom door and Edward went to open it.

"Are ya'll decent?"

"I'd hope so, your wife has been in here for like ten minutes." Edward answered; He and Jasper reappeared a few seconds later.

"Nudity wouldn't stop her." I looked to Alice and she nodded at me from the corner. I held out my hand and she furrowed her brow.

"What?"

I curled a lip at her, "Give me your key, bitch." Ellie held out her hand and I dropped a quarter into it. "That just reminded me," I covered Ellie's ears, "I'm tired of you walking in on Edward and I when we… you know."

"But you're mad at him." Alice said looking heart broken and clutching her key.

"So?"

Edward snorted, "Mad at me? Psh…" Alice leaned forward to look out of the door at him.

"Will you let me keep my key, Edward?" She glanced at me before turning her attention back to him.

"I don't care." He said, she smiled smugly at me and I glared at him. He and Jasper left the room and next thing I knew Alice was shooting off questions.

"Did you kiss, Riley? Did you sleep with Riley? Was it good?" She asked leaning forward on the counter with wide eyes.

"Of course not!" I answered the first two questions. Ellie looked up at me with wide eyes too.

"You messin' with my man?" I shook my head at her.

"Go get dressed Ellie." I said shoo'ing her out of the bathroom.

"So what's his issue if you didn't fuck him?"

"Riley and I both have issues with staying asleep at night… So we were meeting in the kitchen at around three, and Edward found out about it and flipped his shit." I explained. "Now he's being a dick about it, I didn't think it was enough to get mad at…"

"Well say there's this chick… We can call her _Tanya_." I glared, "What if Tanya and Edward were downstairs together, while you slept, doing who knows what?"

_Damn her…_

"Does this mean I have to apologize? At some point he'll get over it and apologize to me… I can wait." I said looking to her for approval of my plan, she shook her head before yelling- scratch that- shrieking his name.

"Hurry up! Oh god… I don't know what happened!" She screamed while waving her hand in her face dramatically, I gave her a strange look before Edwards footsteps thudded up the steps and he burst into the room followed by equally panicked Jasper.

"What's wrong?" He asked, he rushed into the bathroom to see the two of us standing there.

"You guys need to talk." She uttered casually, he looked at Alice incredulously. He gestured around speechlessly before yelling.

"You almost gave me a heart attack." She grinned before leaving the bathroom and dragging Jasper with her. Edward looked at me with his eyebrows raised.

"I'm sorry." I grumbled he cupped his ear and leaned towards me, I scowled and leaned away before crossing my arms over my chest.

"I'm sorry?" He asked.

"You're forgiven." I said with a smile before throwing my arms around his neck and pulling my body to his, kissing him deeply.

"Bella, stop." He said against my lips, attempting to push me away. I backed away and pouted at him.

"Do you want another speech, Edward?" I took a deep breath, "I love you… always will yadah yadah yadah he doesn't matter to me in that way…" I said flippantly, Edward covered my mouth giving me a serious look as he sat on the edge of the tub.

"This isn't funny, Bella."

"Nor is it serious! I mean… My goodness, Edward. What do you want me to do?" I was hit with déjà vu when I spoke. The doorbell rang.

"I don't know." He admitted, our front door opened and Alice greeted all of _our_ guests.

"Nothing happened between Al- _Riley_ and I. We were just talking; you know I've been having trouble sleeping. I don't know why you're so worried about him. What would I look like going all cougar on him?"

_My Mom._

"You're so lucky I love you." He said shaking his head. He wrapped his arms around me and I buried my hands in his hair, holding his head to my chest. I rolled my eyes and he continued to speak, "What the fuck was all that about in the kitchen though _I was going to tell her she didn't need to lose weight'_? Who the fuck says shit like that?" He bit. "Tell him to go after someone else's wife." He whined, I sat on his knee and kissed his head. "My Bella." He said possessively, grabbing my ass and kissing my shoulder. I rolled my eyes before pulling his hands off of me, he pouted up at me.

I ignored his pout, "We need to get downstairs, Baby." He stood up and pulled me against him again. I pushed against his chest and gave him a stern look. I grabbed his hand and dragged him out of the bedroom. I peeked over the railing in the hallway and saw Charlie and Renee sitting on opposite sides of Emmett.

_Where was Renee's little boy?_

They all sat in silence and Emmett looked around uncomfortably. "Hey guys!" I called happily before hurrying down the steps. When I reached the couch they all stood to hug Edward and me.

"How've you been kid?" Charlie asked as he kissed my head.

"_Great_." I mumbled as I switched over to hug Emmett. When I let him go to move down the line I was almost knocked over as Ellie leapt into his arms.

_Where the hell did she come from?_

She squeezed the shit out of his neck and I hugged Mom.

"Hey, Mom." She grinned brightly and squeezed me tightly. I made a show of looking behind her and around the room, "Where's Phil?" She opened her mouth to answer and I cut her off.

"Oh goodness, you didn't leave him in his car seat did you?" She sent me a sneer and I laughed.

"Phil's in Florida. He had a game yesterday and couldn't catch the plane this morning." I nodded. We all made idle shit chat for a while before _Riley_ made an appearance. It was only then did Rosalie and Alice appear. I hugged Rose tightly before letting her go once I noticed her lack of response.

"Rose?" I held her shoulders as I stepped back and looked her in the eye. Her eyes weren't on me but staring over my shoulder. I turned to see Alec enter the living room, smiling all charmingly and what not.

"Hello, Ladies." He said softly, looking me in the eye, I blushed and almost fell as Rosalie's knees buckled.

"Alec. You look…" She gestured to his body and I furrowed my brow. How the hell did she know him and by name. Emmett walked into the kitchen with Ellie on his back, followed by Edward who glared at the back of _Riley_'s head.

"You look…._good._" She finished, Emmett turned to take in the scene after filling up a glass of water. Ellie slipped down his back and wrapped her arms around Alec's leg giving Rose the bitch brow.

We all stood in silence, "Well this is _slightly_ awkward." Alice piped up Seth squealed from his high chair and I jumped, not knowing he was over there. Rose's head whipped around and she went to go pick him up. I would swear she was slightly obsessed with my kid.

"You two know each other?" Emmett asked casually. Alec nodded and crossed his arms over his chest.

"We went to school together actually; back in New York." Rose came back to my side and passed Seth to me.

_She was only obsessed when he didn't have a full diaper._

"I've got him." Edward said before pulling him out of my arms and taking him upstairs.

"Dinner will be ready in a second," I said before shooing the guys and my mother out of the kitchen, Rose and Alice went to leave and I grabbed their shirts pulling them backwards.

"Um so…" Alice gestured after the crowd that currently presided in my dinning room.

"What?"

"What's up with you and Riley?"

"Who?"

"_Riley._"

"You are going to have to elaborate… _obviously._" She groaned.

"Alec." I clarified.

"What about him?"

"That's who we're talking about…"

"You've lost me."

"Alec is _Riley._" Rose frowned before shrugging.

"Okay?"

"And now we know why there are so many blond jokes in the world." I said before pulling the turkey out of the oven.

"I'm confused."

"So you and Alec? Were you… you know…. Close?" Alice asked.

"No not really, we talked at a couple of parties nothing major…" She peeked under some foil and I sighed.

"Well that wasn't as interesting as I thought it'd be." I muttered before taking the Turkey into the dining room. I looked around at the table full of people and groaned when I noticed all but Edward and Ellie had started drinking.

"Don't you all think it's a little early to be drinking?"

"It's twelve o'clock somewhere, Bells."

"Emmett it's twelve o'clock here."

"Told you!" He said raising his glass at me and throwing it back. I shook my head and filed back into the kitchen before bringing out more dishes, when everything I had was on the table I took my seat in between Edward and Riley. Alice and Jasper sat in front of me, Ellie sat on the opposite side of Riley, Em was at the head of the table with rose and Mom on his side, Edward sat at the opposite end, next to me and Seth, Ellie and Charlie sat across from Charlie.

"Okay, I want to make an announcement." Alice said before standing. We gave her our attention and she took a breath, "I am thankful for all of my friends… and Bella's family." She said looking at my parents and Ellie. "I'm so grateful to be a part of this little rag tag group of misfits." She smiled at us all and received only incredulous looks.

_I mean, who the fuck says that?_

…TEC…

"Can we watch Disney Channel, Mommy?" Ellie said looking at me with those beautiful green eyes and I reached for the remote, mesmerized. A hand shot out and stopped me.

"Just say no, Baby." I smiled at Edward and snuggled in to his embrace as he sat the remote down on the side table next to him. We had all moved into the living room after 'diner' to watch Baby Phil's football game.

"Ma-ma!" Seth gurgled as he wiggled out of Rosalie's arms and crawled towards me rapidly. Mom cooed at him from across the room and Emmett looked at him with big eyes.

"Hey I didn't know Eddie Junior could talk." He said happily. There were times that I wasn't sure if Emmett actually knew Seth's name.

"Yeah," I said as I pulled away from Edward to pick Seth up before settling back into his arms. Seth touched Edwards cheek before giggling, "Dada." Everyone around aww'ed and Ellie huffed.

"How come you won't say my name, baby?" She asked, I wasn't sure if she knew his name either. Seth turned in my arms and looked at Ellie before squinting.

"Eh-ee," He smiled at her and she grinned back.

"It could use some work." She said before leaning back against the foot of the couch, next to Edwards legs.

"I have a question." Mom said loudly from her spot next to Emmett on the love seat adjacent to us.

"Who's he?" She pointed at Riley, who had stopped his conversation with Rose to look up.

"Riley Masen, ma'am." Mom blushed and I raised an eyebrow at her.

"So you and Edward are related?" I rolled my eyes.

"Yes ma'am."

"Oh don't call me ma'am! I can't be that much older than you…" She giggled and my eyes widened sarcastically.

"Mom…" She held up a hand to me.

"Tell me about yourself, _Riley…_" She said batting her eyes a him.

"Well he's the only on in the room who isn't _married_, Mother." I bit.

"Riley is a high school dropout and a pothead." Edward said smoothly, I slapped his chest.

"He works in the local dog shelter, he cleans dog shit all day." Emmett helped.

"Up to his _elbows_ in shit, Mama Swan." Jasper piped up. "Only job you can get when you're stoned 24/6. Gotta' leave Sunday open you know…"

"Yeah… I mean he's crawling around in it and-"

"He's also a Levi model." Alice threw in, effectively cutting off Emmett's rant. Riley sat next to Rose looking bashful as we all added some twisted tid-bit to his fake life. Charlie laughed heartily as we continued to fuck up his life.

_Sticks and Stones may break his bones… but words made him a shit crawling pothead._

"How are you two related?" Mom asked, as if she met gorgeous shit sweeping, pot smoking, Levi models on the daily. She pointed at Alec and Edward.

"He's my brother." Edward said sadly.

"We're _related?_" Ellie shrieked. She looked to Riley and shook her head, "You, _Uncle Riley,_ are disgusting." She huffed before standing and crawling into Edwards lap. I snickered and jumped when there were four hard knocks on the door. I got up to answer the door but approached it warily. I peered through the peephole and frowned when all I could see was shoulder. I cautiously opened the door.

An old cranky voice fell on my ears.

"Well if it isn't Bella Cullen." The woman said lifting an eyebrow at me.

"It'll be great, aren't you happy to see her?" The tall gentleman said, as he was midsentence when the door opened, before gracing us with a bright smile. "Happy Thanksgiving!" He said in my ear before hugging me tightly.

"What are you two doing here?"

"I don't know but, Jacob?" She looked up at him with a scowl, "This is a load of shit." Ms. Isabella grunted before walking past me and into my home.

…TEC…

_**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**_

_**So the winning vote for the returning character was obviously Ms. Isabella. I decided to bring back Jake because he was also voted for, not as many times as Ms. Isabella, but I love him anyway!**_

_**Alrighty, let's get to one seventy for an update tomorrow!**_

_**Look how long that was! That at least deserves a review right? Oh yeah.. Leave your sick author some lurve?**_


	8. Chapter 8

**Thanks for all the reviews and alerts!**

**Thanks to: kelliekinz, dazzleglo, Twifan1986, dr. meow, alc10022, Yummy dummy, dr norman, Kgunter34, totes. Mah. Gotes, dowlingnana, kembie, MaryMary123, DenisseSchmidt, melissamary55, steph A15, Cockerspanmom, koleen05, clickchick18, sujari6, Malnaugh, and Music ADD! You're reviews mean so much to me! **

**Standard Disclaimer Applies**

…**TEC…**

"Jake, what are you doing here?" I asked returning his hug excitedly.

"It's Thanksgiving. Why not spend it with the one's your most thankful for?" He said adorably before letting me go.

"What about you?" I pointed at the old hack still standing in the foyer, looking around.

"I came because Jacob wanted me to."

I pouted at her, "You missed us!" Ellie came into the foyer and her eyes widened at the sight of the woman. She slowly backed out of the room while Ms. Isabella was facing me.

Ms. Isabella tossed a look over her shoulder just as Ellie was about to round the corner, "What? You think I didn't hear you come in here? You sound like a herd of elephants." She sneered at Ellie who gave her a fierce look. Edward came up behind Ellie snatching her up into his arms turning her so she faced over his shoulder.

"Jacob, what's up?" He asked before slapping his hand into Jake's and pulling him in for a manly hug.

"The usual. Hi, Elizabeth." He said around Edward, Ellie waved.

After their brief hug Jake looked down to Seth who Alice held. "Hey Jake!" They hugged as well and I looked back over to Ms. Isabella.

"So… How have you been?" She looked at me with an expression that said 'Shut the fuck up. I didn't like you then, why would I like you now?'

"I'm fine."

"Hey Bella? He's yours?" He said as Seth grabbed his hand and smiled at him. I nodded. Jake gestured between Edward and me, "I thought you two weren't… together."

"Yeah, we are now." Edward said sullenly.

"Hey, what the hell?" I growled, Ms. Isabella laughed next to me.

"Don't blame him. He could do much better, dear." She patted my arm and Alice covered her laugh with a cough and walked out of the foyer taking Jake with her, Ms. Isabella trailed after them and I followed.

Edward waited for me, "I was _kidding._"

"Uh huh." He smirked and wrapped his arm around my waist, dragging me toward him before kissing my neck. I pushed him away and walked to the front room where everyone was.

Edward leaned in to kiss me again. "Mommy, don't believe the hype. Old people get cooties too."

…TEC…

"Do you have anything to drink around here?" Ms. Isabella asked before huffing.

"The doctor said that you aren't supposed to drink…" Jacob warned.

"That isn't what he said. You don't listen."

"Then what'd he say?"

"He said to lay off the drinking. And to stay away from sources of stress that bring on my drinking." She let her gaze drag along each and every one of us in the room. I quickly stood and found the strongest shit we had before pouring her a glass. My mother approached me as I poured.

"Who are they?" She whispered jerking her head towards Jake and the old woman.

"My neighbors from Forks." I answered honestly.

"The old woman doesn't like me."

"She doesn't like anyone, Mom." We both looked over our shoulder at the old bat and I poured more into her glass.

"Oh well she has good taste in men." She said gesturing to Jacob, I gagged a little.

"Mom, even though it's normal for you to have to give Phil a bottle before bed, most women don't go the cougar route. They aren't together." She oh'ed and I took the glass to the table.

About three hours and five glasses later Ms. Isabella was actually bearable.

"You know what the worse decision I ever made was?" She slurred before hitting the table with her fist as we all sat around, like asses, laughing at her.

"What?" Ellie asked looking thoroughly disinterested.

"I stopped smoking. I dunno what the hell made me st- yeah I do. The cops." She leaned towards Charlie and drunkenly slapped his cheek before pulling him closer to her. "Marijuana is illegal my ass! That shit is _good_… Then I married my husband… may he rest in peace but that kid was bad news. But I'm single and ready to mingle now, beautiful." She said before pinching Charlie's cheek and leaning in to kiss him. He leaned away from her, almost falling into Rose's lap.

"Ms. Isabella…" Jacob said cautiously, "Leave him alone." She slapped her hand over his mouth roughly.

"You be quiet boy. I haven't been around this much hot penis since I slept with a man with a venereal disease. There was only three in my day." Every hot penis in the room shifted in their chair.

"What's a penis, Daddy?"

"It's another word for an earring." He answered I closed my eyes at the response. I could imagine the phone call now.

"_Mrs. Masen, your daughter has been telling the other children about how you assisted her in putting in a penis…"_

I shivered.

"I'm telling you… you don't want it. You don't want it. It itches and burns. I tell you what the boys? Two bricks and it was all good. But no it was _all up in there!_" She cackled and leaned farther into my father.

"It's all gone now though…"

"Hey…" Jacob said tugging her gently away from Charlie.

"Stone cold fox." She hissed at him, dragging her hand down his chest. Charlie shot up from his chair.

"Alright, I have work tomorrow so…" He eyed Ms. Isabella in a terrified manner. "I'll see you later, honey." He kissed my cheek and Ellie's before hauling ass. Speaking of Ellie, she sat in Edwards lap half falling asleep against his chest in the same way Seth was on me.

"We're going to put them to bed." I said nodding to Edward who stood with me.

"Oh Ellie can't roll with the big dogs can you?" She barked and let out a pitiful howl, "You want a ba-ba too?" She asked, Edward turned to take Ellie upstairs and avoid confrontation. But he was too late as Ellie had shot Alice the bird behind his back. Alice huffed.

"Ellie." I grimaced, "You need to be more respectful." I reprimanded, she nodded sleepily and we all headed up the stairs. I tucked Seth in to the crib while Edward put Ellie down for a nap. I met Edward in the hallway and wrapped my arms around his waist, he kissed my forehead quickly before walking me backwards.

"What are you doing?" I asked as Edward pushed me into the bathroom next to Ellie's bedroom. "Are you having trouble peeing again?" I asked before pouting at him. He hip checked the bathroom door closed and started working on his fly. Once he was able to undo his pants and tug them down to his knees I realized what was so urgent about our meeting in the bathroom. He pulled me closer to him by my waist and kissed me roughly. He turned us in the small bathroom so that I was pressed up against a wall and I groaned as his bare cock rubbed against my stomach.

I pushed his shoulders away and met his eyes, "Are you asking to be cockblocked? There is a whole room full of people downstairs who are most likely on to us." He shrugged before wrapping my hair around his hand tilted my head to the side, before kissing down my neck and grinding against me again.

"Haven't you noticed that we never have to stop when we're in a bathroom?" He groaned against my neck as I slipped my hand between us and stroked his thick manhood.

"Fine." I said before rolling my eyes. I pushed down his arm, forcing him to let go of my hair and I slid down his body. I heard his sigh of relief once I was on my knees and shook my head.

"Oh fuck baby…" He said when I wrapped my lips around his head and sucked lightly. He thrust as far as possible into my mouth and I gagged at the sudden invasion and slapped his thigh. I yanked my head away from him and coughed. Edwards head, the big one, hit the wall and he growled.

"What's wrong with you?" I slapped his calve and he looked down at me.

"Will you just-" He huffed before pulling me to my feet and spreading my legs. He lifted my easily on to the counter and yanked my panties down my legs before pushing my dress up around my waist.

"Hey! What's the fucking rush?" I asked as he slipped his hands between my open legs and rubbed my clit roughly. His big calloused hands gripped and squeezed my thighs. I instantly got wet, like dripping wet.

"Look at you, Baby…" He huskily murmured, and I swear if that wasn't the single sexiest thing I had heard in my life. He twirled his large fingers around my pussy watching as more moisture seeped out. My back arched as he roughly slid his ring finger into me, all the way to the cold metal of his wedding ring.

"Oh, fuck!" He rubbed his thick ass dick against my legs as he fingered me. He quickly pulled his fingers out his eyes locking on my own as he slipped the same finger into his mouth, sucking up every last drop of my arousal. Next thing I knew he had the back of my dress unzipped and was pulling it over my head, haphazardly throwing it behind him. He groped my breasts over my bra, before pushing them together and nuzzling his face in my cleavage. He started to pull my ass toward the edge of the sink and sunk to his knees.

"Fuck baby, I swear, I'm about to tear that fucking pussy up." He groaned, I moaned loudly, not giving a fuck that my family was downstairs at this point. Oh dear fucking goodness, I swear I just came repeatedly. He buried his face between my legs and true to his word tore that shit up. His tongue thrust into me and his hand worked over my clit.

"Oh my god… oh my-" My hips thrust against his face and he smirked against me before sucking my clit into his mouth. "Oh _fuck._" He licked and slurped up all of my cum as I rode his face. "Fuck yes…" I moaned loudly. When he tired of sucking me for what I was worth he stood and thrust his strain manhood into me in a swift motion. He moaned but pulled out of me as soon as he was in. He gripped my waist and spun me so that I faced the mirror.

_Well I for one think that we were porno worthy…_

He slid into me from behind, grasping my hips tightly he pulled me roughly to and away from him. He pulled his hands up to grasp my chest as we fucked.

"Oh fuck." He ran his fingers through my hair and gripped it tightly in his hand, pulling my head back so that more of my chest and neck was exposed to him, He leaned over me and laid open mouth kisses down my neck before pounding into me again. He thrust into me once more before starting to rub my sensitive clit, sending me over the edge.

"_OH FU-_" I screamed, Edward covered my mouth with his hand and started pounding into me again as I rode the waves of white hot pleasure. I bit down on his finger to muffle my screaming and he slapped my ass making me moan loudly.

"What the fuck?" He growled, I rubbed my painfully hard nipples against the cold tile the sensation mixing with Edwards spanking and thrusting threw me violently over the edge again. His thrusting started to get sporadic before he came in side of me, his body jerking against me as he came. When he was spent I pushed off of him before turning and wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing the life out of him.

"Three times? Fuck yeah. I do work, Baby." He smirked under my lips I shook my head at his immaturity and grabbed the hand towel off of the rack next to the sink and wiped his sweaty forehead.

"This was not a good idea…" I whispered as I took in our appearances, we were both sweaty as fuck and panting. My hair was tangled from him fisting the shit out of it.

He shrugged, "Well I thought it was a brilliant, I feel much better." He said easily before leaning down to pull up his pants. When he bent over I almost screamed. My eyes widened and I gasped.

"What's wrong Baby?" I lifted a hand to point at the far wall of the bathroom.

Where the toilet sat.

With my dress in it.

"Sorry…" I huffed and my eye twitched. "Baby, calm down. I'll buy you another one."

"So… am I supposed to walk out of here in underwear? My family is down there, Edward." He sighed.

"I'll be back." He yanked his shirt over his head and rushed out of the bathroom.

"GET SOME!" Alice yelled when the door opened, I blushed deeply and heard a few male groans before closing the door. He slammed the door shut behind him and I went to the toilet, before pulling the soggy fabric out of the bowl. I curled a lip at it before dropping it onto the back of the toilet. Edward slipped in the door holding a t-shirt and sweatpants and threw them to me.

"Thanks." I mumbled before pecking his lips, he smiled at me and left the bathroom again, leaving me to take a shower.

…TEC…

Later after everyone said their awkward post coital, in my case anyway, good-bye, Edward and I sat at the kitchen table with Riley. He seemed to be regarding us cautiously since our little escapade.

"You are _positive_ that no one had an ulterior motive against your father?"

"Not that I know of…"

"No one that had an issue with his position?" I asked.

"Well of course, but there is always someone like that in businesses like the one my father ran, Bella."

"Anyone that you ever noticed was a little bit more than competitive?" Edward asked, before pulling the notepad from under my arm and scribbling on it.

"Well there were two men under him, two men who would be the CEO of the company, in the event that something was to happen to my father."

"Who were these men?"

"Well… Myself and a man by the name of Robert McCarty." Edwards hand stopped scribbling and he tensed before his eyes met mine.

Riley's gaze shifted between the two of us, "Are you two alright?" I nodded and put a hand on Edward's thigh.

"When was the last time you saw this Robert McCarty?" He asked, before continuing to write.

"My father's funeral. He spoke about him there."

"That was months ago, he worked with your father didn't he? If you didn't get the company, which you obviously don't have, then Robert did. Am I right?" Riley nodded.

"After your father's passing he hauled ass didn't he?" I asked, Alec nodded and I frowned. Why the hell weren't people tracking this man?

"Who is in possession of the company then?"

"There is actually a group of people running it. Robert and I decided that this would be best. They run it, but we still make profits." I nodded and stood when a squeal rang through the baby monitor.

Edward looked up at me, "Don't bother coming back down, we're almost finished. I'll be up in a few." I nodded and hurried towards Seth's room.

"Hi pumpkin." I said before lifting him from his crib, I was immediately hit with a rancid smell and held him at arm's length. "Oh, dear god… Why don't we get you changed?" I gently laid him on the changing table and set to work.

The bedroom door closed behind me and Edward spoke, "I could be wrong but…" I looked over my shoulder at him and he pinched the bridge of his nose.

"_But?_"

He let out a heavy sigh, "I think this McCarty guy is my father."

…_**TEC…**_

_**Oh shit! Haha**_

_**I hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**_

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_**What'd you think of Ms. Isabella's drunken ramblings? Hahaha**_

_**Review! It we get to… 195? If we make it there shall be an update tomorrow!**_


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks to: melissamary55, dr. meow1234, sujari6, DenisseSchmidt, sOulOv3, dowlingnana, kembie, luv2dance, MaryMary123, koleen05, Yummy dummy, alc1002, .gotes, kelliekinz, Cockerspanmom, jkkhreedy, Pianogirl05, dazzleglo, clickchick18, rlwoods, STEPH A15, and Twifan1986.**

**You guys are too amazing with your reviews! Haha as for the Robert being Edwards father thing? I likes to keep ya' on your toes! :D**

…TEC…

"You're father?" He nodded and ran his hands through his hair. We hadn't ever addressed the issue of Edwards and Ellie's father. It never came up, I guess I had assumed that he was dead, seeing as Edward never mentioned him. I shook my head as I put his clothes back on him an when he clawed at my shirt I went to where Edward was in the rocking chair, he jumped up and offered me the seat so that I could feed Seth.

"I don't know if I can do this, Bella." He admitted as I held Seth to my breast. "I may have to drop the case." He let out a heavy sigh and sat next to me on the ground, leaning his head against my knee.

I ran my hand through his hair, deep in thought. "I haven't seen that ass in thirty years, Bella."

"You should at least make sure it's him first," He nodded and Seth bit down on my nipple, my hand tightened in Edward's hair and I whimpered.

"Sensitive scalp! _Sensitive_!" Edward cried before he grabbed my wrist.

"Sorry, he bit me…" I snickered at his reaction and rocked Seth back to sleep.

"You and Ellie, you're only half siblings?" Edward nodded.

"Ellie is the result of a drunken graduation party. Mom was a partier; she hung with the best of us." He chuckled, before looking sadly at his folded hands. "I need to sleep," He rubbed his hands down his face and leaned over to take the sleeping baby I offered, before laying him down in the crib. I grabbed his hand and laid a kiss on the back of it, before pulling around my waist.

"Everything will be okay. You don't know that your father- well first of all you don't know if he's your father." He nodded and we walked to our bedroom. "You also don't know if he did it or not. Don't lose hope, Baby." He sighed and I pecked his lips.

"Everything will work out."

…TEC…

"I never understood how women did this." Riley commented as he entered Seth's room, where Seth waddled around in his walker, and I was folding all of our clothes.

"Well it's what we women were born to do... this and make sandwiches." I said sarcastically.

Alec obviously didn't pick up the sarcasm though, because he nodded.

"I suppose that's true. You're probably one of the only women I know that would admit to that." He said in awe.

"I don't understand why women won't just learn their place. Barefoot and pregnant I always say. Morals are for women who don't care for their kids and husbands." I said dryly wondering how long I could milk the dumbass.

He gave me a longing look, "All of the good ones are always taken." I nodded sympathetically.

"Yeah and all the men like you are single. What a shame." Seth half walked half rolled his way over to me, laughing all the while. Even he understood my tone. He reached up toward me and I pulled him out of the toys seat and sat him on my lap.

"Yes…" I coo'ed, "Mommy's a good little house wife." There were rapid knocks on my bedroom door down the hall. Riley squinted as he realized that we were all in the same room.

"Alice? We're in Seth's room." I called, her head popped up in the door way not ten seconds later. She was positively glowing, her eyes alight with joy.

Which meant one of two things.

1) She was pregnant

Or

2) Someone else was suffering.

_Yeah I never said she was a good person._

"You'll never guess what I heard this morning."

Who does it shock that it'd be the latter of the two choices? "You know Lauren Crowley?" I shook my head, having no idea.

"The one that you almost punched."

_There were so many..._

"She gave Edward a lap dance at the Christmas party when Tyler was driving Mrs. Jones home?" I sneered slightly at the memory.

"Yeah. I remember." Alice smile was megawatts bright. "So she cheated on her husband with like four other guys, then one of them joined this religion thing where you have to correct your wrongs." I nodded and her smile got impossibly bigger, "One of his 'wrongs' was knowing that he had gonorrhea and still sleeping around. At some point he ended up showing at Laurens door. She is now the rightful owner of the clap." Alice clapped her hands before laughing wildly. I glanced at Riley to see a horrified look that most likely matched my own.

"Alice... that's terrible!" I gasped. "Tyler is such a nice guy."

"Well it's okay because she now has a personal audience with everywhere she goes." I shook my head.

"Call me slow but I don't get it and... why is that funny?" Riley muttered as Alice nudged him with her elbow.

"You are a terrible person... I mean I knew you weren't a good person… but my _god_." I gasped, Alice shrugged. I then noticed that she held a sandwich in her hand, I rolled my eyes and pushed the second basket of clothes toward her.

"Eat my food, fold my shit." She looked at the basket with an incredulous look.

"He eats!"

"He also helps me out." I said cryptically. Riley's eyes widened as did Alice's. She pursed her lips and picked up a shirt.

"Well if it's this or fucking you ... I guess I've got the safer of the two choices ... you know gonorrhea's going around." She said raising her eyebrows at Riley.

"We aren't-!" I don't know... is it just me or does he sound afraid. "I doubt her husband would appreciate you saying that." He rushed out. Well I'll be damned. He's afraid of Edward.

I laughed, "I meant washing dishes ... groceries all that. I couldn't make him fold clothes anyway. It's a woman's job." I sent Alice a pointed look.

Alice threw down the shirt and sucked her teeth, "You say that?" She asked glaring at Riley. I swear she's a closet feminist. I had a feeling that Alice had a lot of shit trapped in that closet. A lot of shit that I didn't know and didn't want to know about.

"Bella and I were just talking about you know ..." he trailed off.

"Mommy!" Ellie shrieked before slamming the door shut. Edward had gone to pick up a few papers from work and got her on his way home.

Ellie rushed into the room, giving me an exasperated look before turning to Alice.

"Don't you have a job? Or a house?" Edward entered the room and grabbed Ellie before toting her out of the room.

"She seems to have forgotten that she's on punishment." Edward said rolling his eyes and Ellie pouted at me.

"What happened?" I said standing and adjusting Seth before following them.

"Ellie decided that her teacher was being an ass and told her to and I quote 'go fuck himself." I looked at Ellie with wide eyes. Edward's jaw tensed and he dropped down on the bed next to her.

"Ellie, you can't go around repeating everything you hear Mommy say." I nodded until it came to those last few words. I raised an eyebrow and gave him a 'what the fuck' look.

"Hey we all cuss. It's not just me."

"It's mostly you."

"The hell it is!" He gestured at me before giving Ellie a 'told you' glance.

"You cuss just as much as me!"

"Not in front of her though." Ellie's head bounced back and forth between the two of us.

"So?" He squinted at me like I was a dumbass.

Which_... hey…._

"So it doesn't affect them when they aren't hearing me."

"Jackass." I grumbled petulantly before stalking out of the room. I reentered Seth's room to see Alice glowering at Alec. He looked up at me when I entered.

"What'd you do to her?" I laughed.

"I don't even know... she's been like that since you left..." I put Seth back into the walker and picked up the folded clothes, so that I could take them to their respective owners. Riley and Alice jumped up, and flanked me as I made my way around the house.

"Suddenly you don't seem as hot as you did before you started talking." Alice grumbled. I rolled my eyes and drooped Edward's and my clothes off at our room. She bitched at Riley on the way into Ellie's room. Only stopping when we all realized Ellie was crying. I shoo'ed a terrified Alec and Alice out of the room. It was a rare day that Ellie Masen cried. I joined Edward on the bed; he cradled Ellie in his arms as she cried into his neck.

"What's wrong, Pumpkin?" I asked before stroking her hair.

She shook her head and clung to her father.

"What's wrong with Riley?" Edward jerked his chin towards the door that Riley and Alice exited from.

"What do you mean?"

"He had that look…"

"What look? What are you talking about?"

"You know… the look people usually get when they're around us for more than thirty minutes."

"Oh… you know… Alice." He nodded in understanding and I looked over his shoulder to meet Ellie's eyes.

"Tell Mommy what happened, Ellie." He requested, she shook her head no and he sighed, before answering my question.

"She said that she's getting picked on at recess and when her bully hit her she fought back." I shrugged.

_Good for her._

_Wait... _

_No yeah take that little bitch out._

"Then why are you crying?" I asked.

"Her teacher yelled at her and Ellie had told him that the little girl was picking on her, but he didn't do anything."

"Then you guys started arguing." She sniffed, meeting my eyes. I cupped her cheek and kissed her forehead.

"Don't worry about Daddy and me. We will always be okay, even if we so argue ... arguing is... our thing." I smirked at Edward who returned it. "Do you want me to talk to your teacher? Or the little girl's mother?" I asked her softly.

Talk... scream ... fuck up. _Hey_ it's all the same in my Mother's handbook.

"No. When you talk to them they..." she shifted uncomfortably in Edwards lap.

"They what?" I asked quirking an eyebrow. She shrugged and Edward rubbed my back.

"Don't worry about it, Baby. I've got it. I'll make an appointment with her teacher right now." I nodded and he pecked my temple, he gently pushed Ellie into my lap.

"Just know that if you need me to come in and take care of business, I'll be there in a flash." She nodded and hugged my neck.

"Mommy?"

"Hmm?" I rubbed her back.

"He called me a cunt." My face cleared of all emotion and my entire body went rigid. There was a strong hot feeling in my stomach and I felt like I was going to throw up.

I saw fucking red.

"Mommy? What does that _mean?_ Mommy?" Ellie cried. "I keep messing up! I'm sorry, Mommy!" She shrieked before shaking my face. Then she was gone and Edward was shaking my shoulders.

"Baby?" My breaths came out in heavy pants. "Calm down, Bella. You- Hello?" He asked into the phone. My hand shot out and I pulled the phone to my ear.

"Hi, this is Bella Masen, Ellie Masen's mother. We need to speak. When is the soonest time I can meet with you?" I barked angrily. The fucker sputtered over the phone.

"Tomorrow after school?" I said, "Great." I growled and hung up the phone.

Ellie and Edward regarded me cautiously.

"Are you sure you don't want me to go in?" Edward asked warily. I nodded.

There is _no fucking way_ that fucktard was going to talk to my daughter like that and get away with it.

...TEC...

"No fucking way."

"Please, Baby?"

"No."

"I won't use it."

"Good. Then you don't need it."

"I'll fuck you for it."

"That's a shame, degrading your body like that."

"We're married, that's not degrading my body."

"My answer is no, Honey."

"Come on. I have a meeting in ten minutes."

"Bye."

"I'm not leaving unless you give it to me."

"Sex?"

"Really? Why would I be talking about sex?"

"You offered."

"Just come on!"

"No."

"Why not?"

"It's mine."

"Are you fucking serious right now?"

"Yes."

"Sharing is caring."

"I _obviously_ don't care."

"Oh don't you?"

"Back up, don't touch me- Ungh..."

"Can I please have it?"

"No."

"I love you."

"Love you too."

"Then give it to me."

"Okay."

"Wait, what are you doing?"

"You said give it to you."

"Pull up your pants. You know what I want."

"What? I'm not enough for you anymore?"

"Of course not."

"That's what I thou- wait what the fuck?"

"I'm kidding. Come on, I'm almost out of time!"

"You better get going then."

"Baby..."

"You are not going to wave a gun in his face."

"Not wave it. Flash it."

"You can flash me."

"I'm going to punch you."

"You wouldn't hit me."

"Wouldn't I?"

"What the hell! That hurt."

"If you give it to me, I'll kiss it better."

"Why would I give you something for hurting me?"

"You would be giving me something for making you feel better, Baby."

"You're late."

"Damn you."

"Bye. Love you, Beautiful. Hey, watch out for the table-"

"_Oomph_- Every fucking time!"

...TEC...

"Ellie's been having respect issues." I lifted the bitch brow and glared.

"You know normally I wouldn't say anything like this… but at the moment I could care less about how respectful Ellie is to you." His eyes widened and I clenched my fists before pulling my aviators down slightly and looking him in the eye.

_Yeah I'm that ass that wears sunglasses inside._

"Shocking." The prick muttered sarcastically.

I took a deep breath before standing and pushing my suit jacket open. "My little girl said that you called her a _cunt_?" I gritted out.

_The pushing back my jacket thing would have looked better… if I had a gun._

"Oh this is awkward."

"No what's awkward is going to be having to explain that you were fired for bitching at a seven year old at your next job interview." He gulped, "you should be fucking giddy that my husband tailed me on my way here or I would have taken your ass out." I stood and placed my hand on Mr. Yorkie's desk. Yeah Edward had followed me here. He always kept about two or three cars away from me, but how was I not supposed to notice that the exact same car, which sits in my garage, tailed me for seven miles?

"I see where Ellie gets her aggressive attitude from." He said before sticking his nose in the air.

I sat on the edge of his desk and played absent mindedly with a pencil holder. "I see where your future harassment of adolescents charge will come from. Looks like you'll both get a little something from me."

_Was that a real charge?_

"You can't do that." His eyes widened and he gulped again.

"I'm a cop. I can do what I want."

_Except for all that charge shit that I made up_.

"I just thought I'd talk to you before taking this to the school board to see about the termination of your teaching license_." I don't think I could do that either_, but if push comes to shove, I could make his ass my foots new home.

_Could you terminate a license?_

His eyes traveled down my body, and he shifted in his chair.

_Forks Elementary sure knows how to pick 'em. _

_He's a pervert with anger issues. _

_Two for one!_

"Oh does my talk of getting you fired turn you on?" I said in a sultry voice, he gulped and shifted in his seat before adjusting himself. To be honest Yorkie was younger than me. He had to be fresh out of college. And by the looks of it still as horny as a college boy.

"Well try this one out for size big boy ..." I groaned seductively, before raising my voice to an angry growl. "I am going to _fuck you up_. Fucking pervert! Don't you ever talk to my little girl like that! Lost your motherfucking mind-" I lunged at him but was pulled back by my untrusting husband.

He didn't trust me to not fuck up Yorkie.

_I don't blame him. _

Yorkie was against the wall looking at me in fright as Edward half wrestled me out of the room before pinning me to the wall I'm the hallway.

"And that is why I didn't give you my gun." He said panting.

"He called Ellie a cunt. I should have fucking ghetto stomped his testicles." I struggled against him and he lay against me more.

"Calm yourself." He looked into my eyes his green ones intense.

"God you're fucking hot when you get all worked up." He pressed a long kiss against my lips. "I may have to take you up on that sex thing." I scoffed and pushed him away.

"Agh… you wish." I pushed past him and stomped out to the car.

…TEC…

**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**

**Some may think Bella's reaction was a little over the top but… its fiction. And I for one would be just as pissed if something like that happened to me. **

**I have exams for the rest of the week starting tomorrow (Agh wish me luck…) So there is a big possibility that there won't be updates for the next three days… maybe one on Saturday or Sunday… I don't know. But if we get like tons of reviews… Like a review miracle. I'll see about an update sooner.**

**Review! **

**Side note: This was actually the chapter where I found my funny, in my opinion! I'm not sure if you'd agree.**

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**Long ass authors note over :D**


	10. Chapter 10

**Thanks to: dowlingnana, dr. meow1234, DenisseSchmidt, Kgunter34, lolz, Cockerspanmom, totes. Mah. Gotes, dazzleglo, Inserthilariousnamehere, Twifan1986, alc1002, Yummy dummy, luv2dance, kembie, rlwoods, melissamary55, koleen05, kelliekinz, jkkhreedy, and steph A15. You're reviews mean so much to me! This chapter was the least I could do :D**

**Thanks for all the 'good luck's on my exams! They meant a lot!**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

"Ugh," I wiped my forehead and groaned as I tore open another heavy ass box. I had been sitting in our messy attic, with Ellie and Seth going through all of our old shit that we were too lazy to unpack when we moved in, looking for Edwards old pictures that I knew he had, but had never seen.

"Mommy?" Ellie whined before pulling the bandanna off of her head and throwing it to the ground. "What are we even looking for?"

"Pictures of Grandma."

"Why?"

"Because Daddy would like it. He misses her."

"But we saw her last week…. Why would he miss her?"

"Not my Mommy, Daddies Mommy…" I explained slowly, she huffed again.

"Why is the baby up here?" She pushed Seth's walker away from her. He came speeding towards me, happily. I caught the toy and steadied him.

"Ellie don't do that. You could have hurt him."

"Sorry, Mommy. What are we looking for again?" I sighed.

"Pictures of Daddy's mother."

"What! I found those a long time ago! You should have tolded me!" She squealed, I groaned and dramatically fell onto my back, in exhaustion. Seth waddled over to me in the walker and stood over me, peering over the rounded edge of the toy and smiling at me. Then Ellie was over me, holding up a picture frame of her mother.

"This is her? This is what you're looking for right?" I nodded and sat up before taking the picture from her. She went over to a large box and pushed it over to where Seth and I were. She pulled out another picture and held it up in front of Seth.

"Look, Baby. It's Gran-ma!" She cooed.

"His name is Seth, pumpkin." I shook my head, running a hand through her hair. She shrugged off my comment and continued looking through the boxes.

"What's this?"

"That would be Daddies degree, from college."

Why the hell was all of this packed away?

"Wanna help me get this stuff downstairs?" She shrugged. I pulled out a bag I had brought up with me, knowing that I wouldn't be able to drag the boxes downstairs. I jammed some frames and whatnots into the cloth bag and I descended the ladder with it handing it to Ellie before going back up for Seth. I pulled him out of the toy before realizing there was no way I was carrying that big ass thing down steps. I went back down the ladder with Seth, sitting him far away from the steps and making Ellie hold onto him.

I quickly went back up that ladder and let me tell you. That shit was getting old.

"Mommy, what are you doing?" She asked as I pushed the walker over the opening in the ceiling.

"Back up, Ellie!" I yelled, she shrieked as I sent the large item through the hole. It crashed to the ground below and the kids screamed like it had hit them despite there being more than a few yards between them and the crash.

I came down the ladder for the final time and pushed it up into its little hole.

"Good lord, Mommy! You couldn't have thought that was a good idea!" I shrugged and knelt down next to them.

"You guys are okay, right?" Ellie nodded and Seth cried and reached for me.

"Take it like a man, Baby!" Ellie said as I picked up her little brother. I shook my head at her and kissed her forehead.

"Help me get all of this set up, before Daddy gets back?" She nodded and grabbed the bag, dragging it behind her as we walked down stairs. "Don't break anything." She huffed as she picked the bag up, while descending the steps.

We set up the pictures all around the house, pictures of Elizabeth and Edward, and a few that we found of Ellie as a baby. Seth trailed Ellie around in his newly broken walker, one of the wheels was messed up during its fall, so when he attempted to walk towards the direction of the wheel he was stopped and spun in the opposite direction. I officially earned the bad mother of the year award when I laughed every time.

The garage door went up while I was in the kitchen, making sandwiches, because I'm, a walking and bitching, cliché. Edward's footsteps sounded as he approached the door that separated the garage and kitchen. Ellie jumped up to meet him at the door, and when I say meet, I mean tackle.

"Woah… Hi honey." He chuckled as he lifted her into his arms.

"Hi, Daddy! I missed you! Mommy tried to kill me and Seth earlier today." She said happily, Seth squealed in agreement and his walker spun him into the counter next to my legs, I gently nudged him away, making sure to avoid the bum wheel.

"That's not true." I rolled my eyes as Edward came to me and wrapped an arm around my waist before kissing my cheek.

"She threw Baby's chair at us." Edward's easy smile then turned concerned.

"I dropped Seth's walker…" Edward nodded.

"Over us." Ellie added.

"I dropped it from the attic. Thank you very much. What does it matter you were like… ten feet away." Ellie snickered.

"And why were you dropping things from the attic?"

"Don't worry about it." He sighed before casting a glance at his watch.

"Shit I have to go, Baby. I'll be back soon, I'm just going out with the guys." I nodded and he pecked my lips before giving Ellie a dollar and rushing out of the door.

"You know, this dollar completes what I need for that hotel room. Got the bus ticket yesterday." She gave me a look from under her lashes with a dark smile and I jerked the dollar out of her hand.

…TEC…

**EPOV**

"How knows what her issue is. She goes on and on… 'Where were you? Why didn't you _call _me? Who is she?'" Stanley mocked in a high pitched voice, when in all honesty his wife's voice was deeper than his normal speaking voice. "Controlling… I tell ya'…" There were two other nods around the table.

"Alice flips a shit every time I leave the house! Yet she's _always _out." Jasper looked to me and shrugged, "She's usually at your place though. Still though, I can't go out on fishing trips because the wife thinks I'm screwing every chick with a pair of legs. Gah…" I sighed and took a pull from my beer while they nodded in agreement with Jaspers words.

"What about you, Masen?" Crowley asked before leaning towards me.

"Yeah man. You gotta' have something on that Bella… She's _uh_…" Stanley's eyes widened and I glared at him.

"She's _uh-_ _what?_" I growled before setting the bottle on the table.

"Nothing man! I was just thinking that she was the jealous type."

"She's not." I grumbled. I realized that hanging out after work with a bunch of married guys wasn't what I thought it'd be. All they did was whine about their wives. And gossip. It was like sitting around with Bella after she spent an excessive amount of time with Riley and Alice.

"Mhmm." He said disbelievingly.

"No really, she won't give a shit if I came in at two o'clock tomorrow morning." I said honestly.

"Is that so? Why is that?"

I looked around the room, "She trusts me."

They all started laughing and I threw my hand up, "What the hell?"

"She _trusts_ you." As if that explained anything.

"So? That's a good thing." I attempted to convince.

"Oh _puh-lease._" Jasper said… flamboyantly. He leaned forward resting his elbows on the table. "That just means that she thinks you're too big of a pussy to cheat on her."

"That, my friend, is a sure sign of a failing marriage. You shouldn't be surprised if she packs up and moves in with a biker sometime soon." Crowley pitched in. He shook his head sympathetically but laughed all the while before pushing a shot glass towards me and signaling for another.

"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard." I groused.

"What? So you're okay with Bella thinking that you're not good enough to cheat on her?" Stanley hedged.

"I don't think she thinks I'm not _good_ enough… What's so wrong with her trusting me?"

"Man there is no such thing as _trust_. It's either 'Oh I need to keep my man… he can get snatched up because he's that great' or it's 'Oh he isn't going anywhere. Who would want his ass anyway?' You my friend sound like the latter." I ran a hand through my hair, another shot glass was thrust into my face and I knocked it back easily.

"Bella's different." I whined.

"Yep, okay. Well when the sex stops you'll realize that we were right."

"And what do you suppose I do about Bella?" Was it wrong to feed into this stupidity?

"Cheat on her." Newton suggested, I rolled my eyes because that jackass was the only single one here.

"Spray some cheap perfume, with sparkly shit in it, and lube up a condom and put it on. Then ask her to take a shower with you."

"So I'm ready?" I knocked back another glass, feeling a little more than buzzed.

"No so it looks like you had sex. With a stripper. I did it with Jessica. Worked like a charm." Stanley snorted before taking a shot and passing me another. Jasper looked at the glasses longingly as he was the designated driver. I nodded as I considered what they'd said as I knocked the small glass back.

"Slow down there buddy." Jasper warned after I knocked back two shots in a row.

"So I have to sleep with someone else? To make Isabella love me again?" I slurred slightly and then realized that I called her _Isabella_ it's such a pretty name.

_Isabella. _

_I don't want to lose her._

"But I love her _so_ much!" I cried as I threw back another glass.

"Looks like you're going to have to get over that and fuck someone else." Newton said as if it was _him_ losing his wife.

"Shut up… Newton. You're just mad cause you want my wife…" I slurred before pushing him gently, well I put all my strength into it but apparently I'm not too strong while drunk.

"Dear goodness, you're such a light weight."

"That's like his fifth shot." Newton snorted, I pointed at him.

"You don't know what it's like man. You don't know how it feels to be unloved. I have to go _sleep_ with another person!" I wailed, Jasper stood and pulled me out of my chair.

"That's enough, you asses. If I get a call from Bella while Ali and I are having _relations_, I'm going to hunt each and every one of you down. Seriously. You don't understand how scary she is…" Jasper pulled me by my shirt sleeve.

"She's not a-scary. She's beautiful…" I slurred, "Don't talk about my wife dick… She's going to leave me because I can't cheat." The fact that I would soon be single weighed heavily on my mind.

_What am I supposed to do? _

_I'll always love her._

"Edward… dude, why are you crying?"

"You don't know how hard it is being a single parent, Jasper…" I cried feeling the warm tears slip down my cheeks quickly. "You don't know!"

"Neither do you." Crowley laughed before patting my back.

"Edward you aren't single." Jasper assured.

"You're just drunk, genius." Newton jumped in.

"Guys get him outta' here. You're starting to make a scene." Crowley muttered before going to pay the tab. I laid my head on Jaspers shoulder, letting my tears soak his jacket.

"I'm drunk on forbidden love." I cried, Jasper patted my back sympathetically before urging me towards the door.

"You're married, Edward."

"Not for long!" I wailed, I rested a hand on Newton's shoulder and leaned in. "Do you know what it's like to have my wife sleeping with someone else?"

"Yeah man. I know exactly what it's like you know, since she's sleeping with me." I leaned backwards before throwing a pitifully executed punch to his jaw, which he dodged. Jasper was back a minute later.

"You're the reason she doesn't love me!" I screamed before trying to throw another punch, Jaspers arm wrapped around my waist and he strong armed me out of the restaurant.

"I just lost my entire life… in an hour." I said in awe before running my hands through my hair.

"Edward. Calm down. I swear if Bella sees you crying not only are you going to be embarrassed in the morning but I won't be able to have children." He shifted and covered his crotch, I smiled.

"You're having a kid? Congratulations!" I hugged him tightly and he pushed me back.

"You're such a lightweight." He chuckled. Newton, Stanley and Crowley exited the bar soon after.

"Who's taking him home?" Crowley asked.

"I will. It'll give me a little more time to get to know Swan while he sleeps." Newton wiggled his eyebrows and I lunged for him again Crowley held me back.

"Okay I have him." Tyler patted my back while simultaneously pushing me towards his car. "See you later guys. Newton I'm going to kick your _ass_ tomorrow if Bella kills me."

…TEC…

BPOV

"But my friend is in that class Mommy!"

"Yes well your teachers a dick, pumpkin. So you're switching classes."

"What's a dick?"

"I _meant_ he's a jerk."

"So Aunt Alice is a dick?"

"Yes. Goodnight, Ellie." I kissed her head three times before adjusting a sleeping Seth on my shoulder.

"Night, Mommy. I love you!"

"Love you too." I tucked the blanket in around her and turned on her lava lamp and leaving the room.

"Wuv Mama." Seth whispered sleepily, I hadn't even realized he was still awake.

"Aww," I coo'ed before peppering his little cheeks with kisses. "I love you too, honey." I set him in his crib before kissing him again and handing him a stuffed animal. The front door opened and there was a shit load of stomping downstairs. I hurried into the hallway and peeked over the railing to see Edward, who was crying, and being supported by Tyler.

"What happened?" I asked before darting down the steps. I pulled my hair into a ponytail with the holder on my wrist.

_I'm about to fuck someone up._

"Crowley what happened to him?" I said before cupping his jaw and looking at the bruise there.

"He hurt himself getting out of the car." Tyler rolled his eyes and Edward pulled out of my grasp.

"Don't _touch_ me." He said before batting my hand away. "You think I'm not good enough to cheat on you?" His eyes widened and I closed mine in exasperation.

"What are you talking about?"

"Why don't you _love_ me anymore?" Tears leaked from his eyes, it was very emasculating but he was drunk, so…

Crowley cleared his throat, "See ya', Swan." He backed out of the foyer and I turned my glare on him

"You _stay_." He didn't stop but took off running instead, I just shook my head.

"Are you okay? How much did you drink?" I asked before cupping his face.

"You're not gonna' ask me where I was?" He whined, I furrowed my eyebrow.

"No…? I haven't before…"

"Everyone else's wife asks! You don't though. You think I'm afraid of you Bella? You think I won't cheat?" He stood shakily from his seat and I looked at him with an intense burning indifference.

"I _know_ you won't cheat, Edward." I said attempting to soothe him.

"Why because you _trust _me?" He cried, slurring the word trust in a disgusted tone.

"Yes." I wrapped my arms around his waist and he pushed me away.

"No! You can-can't trust me, Baby. This isn't going to work." I attempted to suppress my smile but he was so damned cute, his cheeks were all flushed and his nose was red.

_Too cute._

I wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him towards the steps, "What's not going to work, Honey?" We started up the steps and he leaned heavily on me.

"Our marriage." He said seriously, stopping on the stair case, I turned to face him.

"Edward come on now. You're drunk."

"I'm serious! What's a marriage without deceit?" He said grabbing my hands in both of his, his tears stopped.

"A successful one. Come on, Baby. Bed time." I whispered in an attempt to have him lower his voice. He shook his head and turned to go back down the stairs, but fell on his ass… up the stairs.

"Don't wanna…." He slurred before stomping his foot.

_Could he be more wasted?_

"Honey stand up. You're being silly, let's go to sleep._"_

"Will you intercourse with me?" I nodded and rolled my eyes.

"Sure… Tomorrow I'll 'intercourse with you'. Or you know the next day."

"I wana coitus now, Baby. Come on," He grabbed my leg, pulling it over his legs and shoving me down into his lap.

"No not now. Edward, Honey, get up." His head dropped to my shoulder and I huffed.

"I'm tired, Baby. You're so pretty."

"You're just drunk, I look like crap."

"Don't say that! You're beautiful." His face wrinkled up like he was going to cry again, "Every girl should feel pretty!" His hand tangled it's self in my hair and he pulled me down for the sloppiest kiss I've ever had.

"Yep, get up. You're _really_ fucking wasted." I stood from his lap and caught my footing on the step next to him. He shook his head, "Honey if you get up and come to bed I'll feel really pretty."

"I'll make you feel pretty?" I nodded and kissed the top of his head.

"Come on." I coerced, he stood and wrapped his arm around my shoulder before letting me lead him up the rest of the stairs and into the bedroom. He collapsed into the bed, well he attempted to collapse into the bed he actually clipped the side of the mattress and fell on his back, on the floor.

"Oh shit!" He cried, I leaned on the wall and doubled over with laughter. I clutched at my stomach while he shot up. There were three hard knocks on the door, I turned and opened it to reveal a hesitant looking Riley.

"Is everything all right? I heard some… noises."

_Wish you heard them when I was lugging his heavy ass up all of those stairs._

"We're fine." I chuckled he looked into my eyes as if he were searching for something.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah she's sure! Go away boy." Edward slurred as he stood and nose-dived into the bed.

"He doesn't drink very often… That's why he's… so…" I gestured to Edward who was curled up into fetal position with his ass in the air. "Yeah, goodnight, Riley."

"Night." I closed the door and walked to Edward.

"Come on, Baby. You want to take off your shoes? Yeah you do!" I said before grabbing at his foot.

"Bella. I'm drunk not a dog." He said seriously. He sat up and looked around the room no doubt taking in Ellie and my handiwork. "That's my mom." He picked up a picture of her and stared at it for a bit before setting it back down on the dresser. "I miss her. Thank you." He frowned before sloppily holding open his arms. I walked to him and sat with my back to him, letting him wrap himself around me.

"I know, and you're welcome." I wasn't sure but I think he drooled on my neck.

"Not a dog my ass. That's gross."

"What now you don't want to kiss me? You never loved me!" He pulled away from me, crawling around me so that he could lay facing opposite of me.

_A kiss, is that what that was?_

"Alright, you go to sleep, honey." I said before patting his ass and turning on my side. He didn't need sleep, he needed a fucking tampon.

…TEC…

**Hope you enjoyed and/or laughed.**

**Exams are over so updates will be coming more! Yay but don't stop with the reviews! I love them and they all make this story happen, you ladies (and gentlemen… *eye roll* that's a technicality) They motivate me to write! **

**So what do you think about Riley? (My prof. picture) does he live up to your expectations? **

**Review… They're better than drunken Edward kisses. Well… I'm sure a lot is better than drunken Edward kisses… Review anyway though?**

**If we get two forty I will update tomorrow.**


	11. Chapter 11

_**Thanks to: Yummy Dummy, Twifan1986, blue eyes lover, Kgunter34, DenisseSchmidt, bearygirl, Cockerspanmom, clickchink18, dowlingnana, luv2dance, Ffff, alc1002, MaryMary123, vampirelove11, totes. Mah .gotes, kembie, steph A15, iloveChiodosXD, koleen05, BMontague, kelliekinz, ADADancer, Melnaugh, Leah C. Drawn, sujari6, and melissamary55!**_

_**You all seriously make my day with your reviews! You all are so nice and I love reading your thoughts, you all inspire me.**_

_**Standard Disclaimer Applies**_

…TEC…

"Agh…" I looked down to the foot of the bed where Edward had slept and smiled. "What the hell is all of th-" He wiped at him mouth no doubt feeling the drool there. "I feel like I licked a camel's ass…"

His eyes met mine and he sat up, "What did you do to me?" I chuckled and sat up too.

"Uh uh. You did this to yourself, Baby. In fact I'm surprised you're still here." I smirked at him and he raised an eyebrow. He looked like hell run over. His normally messy hair was matted and his eyes bloodshot, that bruise he had from the car was starting to darken and swell.

_My poor Baby._

"What are you talking about?"

"You don't remember telling me that our marriage wasn't going to work?" He thought and then frowned, "You remember yet?" He shook his head and I continued, "_Remember_ talking about how you were good enough to cheat on me?" I crawled towards him and he pouted.

"Shh... I'm sorry but please don't yell." I smiled and kissed his cheek. He pulled me into his lap and kissed my neck, much like he had last night, except I didn't need a towel after this kiss.

"It's okay because you also said that I was pretty. That kind of made up for the entire fiasco." I said before patting his cheek.

"Honey, you are shallower than a kiddie pool." He said before stroking my hair. He reached up and touched his face.

"Bella you didn't… _take advantage_ of me last night… did you?"

"Yes, your cheek hurts because I sexually assaulted you."

"That doesn't sound good." Both of our heads snapped toward Alice, who stood in the doorway with Jasper, who looked mighty sheepish. Edward winced at the shrill sound of her voice and buried his face in my shoulder.

"Hey Edward… Bella." My name was almost whispered as Jasper warily greeted me.

"Why are you in here?" Edward asked, then he shot Alice a pointed gaze. "Must you always be so noisy."

"'_Must you always' _meh meh meh… This is the twenty first century. Talk like it Edward."

"Mhmm, mature. And you wonder why Bella's the only one that likes you." He shot back, Jasper nodded silently behind Alice.

"See and this is why I wanted my key back." I groaned.

"You guys weren't having sex Bella." She rolled her eyes, as if that remedied the whole situation.

"No but it is seven o'clock on a Saturday morning. So why are you here?" Edward rubbed at his temple and put a finger to his lips, telling us to quiet down.

"Jazzy wanted to talk to Edward, and make sure Crowley wasn't dead… or locked in your basement."

"There isn't room for Crowley's big ass down there. My whore eating rhino takes up too much space." I pursed my lips and Ellie came up and wrapped her arms around Jaspers waist.

"You better watch out, Aunt Ali." She smiled angelically as Jasper pulled her up into his arms. Edward groaned next to me and lay back down before attempting to smother himself with a pillow.

"What's wrong, Daddy?" She asked loudly, he visibly flinched under the pillow.

"Daddy has a head ache honey."

"I can relate," She leaned into Jasper before whispering loudly, "Mommy _never stops_ with the _talking_." Jasper's face turned red under my gaze as he attempted to suppress his laughter.

"Why are you awake, Elizabeth?" I quirked an eyebrow at her and she shrugged.

"Because I drove your car off of a cliff in my dream. I had to wake up 'fore I died." She yawned in Jaspers face and he winced away from her morning breath.

"Alright, Honey. Come here, go back to sleep." Jasper walked her over to the bed and she crawled in next to Edward before peeking under the pillow. "You two. Leave."

"But-"

"I'll see you later."

"Bella-"

"Toodles."

It was Jaspers turn, "I need to talk to Edw-"

"So long, farewell… evita sane goodby-e… adieu adieu to you and you and you…" I sang Jasper sighed and wrapped his arm around Alice's shoulder and led her out of the room.

"See ya' later alligator!" Ellie screamed, at their retreating forms, next to Edward's ear. I grabbed her by the waist and pulled her away as Edward flinched hard enough that he fell off of the bed. Ellie howled with laughter and I peeked over the edge of the bed.

"You okay?" He nodded and let his form relax against the hardwood floor.

"I think I'm gonna' sleep down here. It's quieter…" He whispered before scowling at me.

"Hey you're the one who thought it was a good idea to get drunk last night."

"At the time I thought my marriage was over. It makes sense."

"No… No it doesn't." I rolled my eyes and turned back around on the bed to where Ellie had passed out, in the middle of the bed, the kid was definitely going to be tall when she grew up because as she slept, spread eagle, there was only a bit of room left on the queen sized mattress. I scooted in next to her and pulled the blankets over us.

She abruptly turned and threw a leg over mine, "You got a fish? I got two fish…" I snorted and nudged her.

"Ellie… Good god you're heavy."

"You want my fish? You can't have my fish." She wailed in my ear, I pushed away from her as quickly as possible and Edward shot up from his place on the floor.

"The hell?" He groaned before slouching out of the room. I covered Ellie's mouth with my hand and fell right back asleep.

…TEC…

"Uncle Riley you wanna' come Christmas tree shopping with me, Mommy and Daddy?" Ellie asked Alec over the paper.

"And Seth."

"And Baby…" She mumbled quietly at my correction, he walked up giggling and she sent him a grimace before kicking the walker away from the kitchen table, Edward caught Seth with his legs as he walked in.

"Elizabeth Masen. If you kick Seth one more time-"

"I didn't kick him."

"Don't lie, Ellie." I shook my head and turned the pancakes.

"I'm not lying! I pushed his wheels."

"Well stop pushing him. It's not nice." Edward said as he sat next to her at the table. He had obviously just woken up; his hair was messy as hell and his eyes were baggy. He had decided that it would be more peaceful if he slept in Ellie's room. It was quite a sight seeing his large form curled up in the pink sleigh bed, under the Cinderella cover.

"Are we still going to go shopping?" She asked him, Edward shot me a puzzled look.

"Shopping for what?"

"Christmas trees!" She shrieked, Edward and Riley jumped while I shook my head and Seth screamed with her. Edward gently pushed the screaming child away from him with his foot and Seth went skidding across the floor and stopped, due to his bum wheel, and turned before shooting towards Ellie, who caught him and patted his head.

"Daddy!" She gasped, before pouting and looking at Seth with sympathy. "You could have hurt him!" She tusked at Edward and he came up behind me and laid his head on my shoulder.

"Make it stop…" He whined against my neck, I reached back and patted his head before scooping the pancakes onto a plate.

"When do you want to go look for trees?" I asked before handing him plates to take to the table and bringing a few myself, he shrugged. As we both sat down Edward looked at Riley.

"Do you celebrate Christmas?"

"Well duh… If he didn't Santa wouldn't come. And if Santa doesn't come, Riley doesn't wake up on Christmas day." She looked at him with wide eyes and I shook my head. There really was no hope for that kid. She was going to grow up just as crazy as Edward and me.

"I do celebrate Christmas…" Alec trailed awkwardly giving Ellie a scared look. She smiled happily and I sent her a glare.

"Chill out, Ellie." I grumbled.

"What's wrong with you people today? It's a beautiful day! To get a big tree! And talk to Santa about getting big presents for me!" Ellie rallied, Seth cheered her on from her side.

"And maybe Santa will bring Baby a rattle or something for being a good sport." Seth bounced in his seat at the recognition. I pulled him out of the poor battered toy and set him in the high chair between Edward and I. I turned and grabbed a small can of Baby food off of the counter and set it on the tray in front of Seth before standing to get a baby spoon.

"What's this?" Edward asked turning the small jar in his fingers.

"Baby food." I grumbled, I needed a shit load more sleep.

"But I thought he drunk…uh..." He made a cupping motion over his chest, "milk." I squinted at him before rolling my eyes at his pathetic charades attempt.

"He's getting to be a little old for breast milk, Honey. Anyway the kid has to eat at some point. What do you want me to do? Whip out the goodies right here?" Ellie wrinkled her nose and the top of Riley's ears grew red.

"I think everyone has already had an eyeful. That won't be necessary." He bit out after noticing Riley's reaction. I shot Edward a look and kicked him as I sat down.

"Don't start." I unscrewed the lid off of the food and scooped some out before holding it to Seth's mouth. Seth wrinkled his nose at the food.

"Look Daddy likes it." I smiled at the little boy and shoved the food in front of Edwards face, there was no fucking way I was eating that nasty ass food. Eggplant and Carrot.

_What the hell?_

Edward scowled at me before sending Seth as smile and wrapping his lips around the spoon and swallowing. "Mmm Mmm, yummy." He said weakly before he started turning green. I scooped up some more food and held it to Seth's mouth; he ignored me and looked to Ellie… for confirmation?

"Go ahead, Baby. It doesn't taste good but you'll like it because you aren't too bright." She smiled nodding and Seth listened before eating the food off of the spoon easily. Why he would listen to someone who refused to call him by his right name _and_ called him stupid in the same sentence I would never know. It must be a Masen thing it would explain why Edward listened to me.

Edward pushed away from the table, "We're leaving in an hour. You done, Ellie?" She nodded, "Go take a bath and get ready, okay?" she nodded again and stood up following him to the sink where they dropped off their plates.

"Sorry about that." I said to Riley, he just shrugged.

"I'm used to it. Took awhile. But I got there." He smiled jokingly at me and I grinned back.

"Do you actually want to spend more time with all of us? I can call Tanya or Mike over to stay with you…"

"No it's fine. I'll go with you guys. You're a pretty interesting group of people." He laughed lightly and cleared his area, "See you in about an hour." I nodded and put the spoon up to Seth's mouth again.

"Wanna' eat, Sethypie? Wanna eat?"

His little hand shot out and knocked the spoon from my hand, "You ea-ea, Mama." Even though he was being a dick I couldn't help but be proud of his little rude ass. He was so smart, it was hard to believe he had only been talking for about a month, yet he seemed to mimic a lot of what I said.

"No you eat-eat." I smiled and refilled the spoon, once I got it into his mouth there were three rapid and hard knocks on the side door, which also happened to be across from the kitchen table. I stood and opened the door to reveal Tanya.

"What are you doing here?" I asked raising an eyebrow.

"I heard we were going tree shopping." She smiled sarcastically at me before stepping into the house. "How cute." She sneered looking around the kitchen before her eyes landed on Seth.

She walked to him and he smiled brightly at her, "You must be Seth! How cute are you?" She touched his cheek and he grabbed her finger, smiling cutely at her. I huffed from behind him.

"_We're _going tree shopping. So what are _you_ doing in my house?" I asked.

"Oh don't be like that, Bella." She smiled sweetly at me and I curled at lip.

"Like what, Tanya?" She didn't reply and I sighed, "You can wait in the living room, everyone is getting ready." I smiled right back at her before going and picking up Mommy's little traitor and heading up the steps.

…TEC…

"I like this one!" Ellie screeched as she pointed at a small almost needle less tree.

"Ellie we aren't getting a Charlie Brown tree." Edward said as he steered her away from the pitiful looking thing.

"Who's he?"

"He was a cartoon character, Honey." Tanya explained, Ellie furrowed her eyebrows at Tanya and rolled her neck.

"I'm not your 'Honey'. So don't call me that."

"Ellie don't be rude." Edward scolded before nudging her towards the next tree. I walked up behind them as he whispered to her, "Did Mommy ask you to say that?" I took off my glove and slapped the back of his head with it.

"No, I didn't." He raised an eyebrow at me and I sent him the bitch brow. "Edward."

"Bella."

"Mature much?"

"I could ask you the same."

"You're an ass."

"Tis the season." I narrowed my eyes and he smirked. I adjusted Seth on my hip and turned to find Riley pushed up against a tree, leaning away from a cougar-esque looking Tanya. I rolled my eyes and called him over, causing Tanya to glare at me.

"You stay with me, and you'll be alright kid." He nodded and thanked me.

"Uncle Riley! I like this one do you?"

"Mhmm it's-"

"You like it Mommy?" She asked cutting him off.

"I don't know it's a little-"

"Baby?" Seth bounced in my arms and smiled.

"Daddy we all like it! Can we get that one?" She asked pointing at the snow covered tree before giving him the puppy dog eyes. Edward sighed and nodded before going through all of the necessary measures to attract the attention of the sales person.

"Oh how I envy you." Tanya said as she stood next to me and watched Edward and Riley pick up the large tree.

"I know."

"They really are something, aren't they?" She bit her lip and I scowled.

"Yeah too bad one is married and the other is young enough to be your son." I exaggerated.

"I am _not_ that old!" She gasped.

"De-Nile isn't just a river in Africa, Tanya." I patted her shoulder and Seth giggled before pressing his cold nose into my neck.

"Mhmm well you should just be happy that you got to Edward before I did." She glared at me. Seth's little face pinched up at he watched our conversation, obviously feeling the tension.

"Yeah because if he didn't, who _knows_ what he'd be infected with by now."

"Well whatever I have would be better than being with you."

"It's funny you say that because him _not _wanting to be with me is _exactly_ the reason that we got married and had kids. That was like spot on." I said dryly, she scowled at me and disappeared in the trees.

Not soon after gunshot rang out through the air and screams sounded around the little shopping area, I dropped to the ground making sure that Seth received none of the pressure from the fall, and pulled Ellie down next to me. Edward and Riley dropped the tree that they held and crouched down as well. Edward drew his gun from his waist band and I pulled mine from my ankle.

"Mommy?" Ellie asked sounding terrified. "Why do you have that? Put it away before you get hurt!" She pulled Seth closer to her and I turned and peeked through all of the trees to see if anyone or thing was hit by the shot and where it was aimed. Another shot was fired and I curled my body around the kids. That shot did hit something this time, it hit the fence that surrounded all of the trees, the post that was hit splintered, and hit a few people, or so I'm assuming due to the groans and screams.

"Someone help!" A ladies voice rang out, I checked to make sure that the car, a black Mercedes with tinted windows, was gone before ordering Ellie to stay where she was with Seth and going to find the injured person.

"Oh god…" The woman shrieked I came up behind her to see that one or more of the large wooden splinters had hit an older woman in the stomach, there was blood soaking her clothes and the woman above her.

"You call 911." I said pointing at the woman before taking off my jacket and my sweater and packing the material around the splinters. Edward approached us from behind. "Will you go find me a first aid kit?" I asked him as the blood seeped through my sweater.

"Bella? Are you alright? Do you need anything?" Riley asked.

"You're sweater or coat?" Tanya came up next to him and immediately started taking off her sweater too, handing it to me. "Check her for shock will you?" I asked Tanya, as the old fragile woman's eyes went wide, and her breathing stuttered. I heard sirens and then the paramedics were around us. Edward appeared only moments later with a first aid kit leaving it with the paramedic and helping me off of the ground.

"Are you okay, Baby?" he asked before wrapping his arms around me and pulling me to his chest.

"I love you, and I'm sorry. For yesterday, and today…" He whispered before kissing my head and pressing me tighter to him.

"It's okay, I love you too." The paramedics asked us for some room to get the woman on the stretcher and we obliged, before going off to get Seth and Ellie who sat in a little area sectioned off by at least twelve foot tall trees. Ellie leaped into my arms as we crouched in front of them and Edward picked up Seth. Riley and Tanya found us only minutes later and Alec's eyes searched mine.

"Was that meant for me?"

…TEC…

_**Yes, I really did end it there :P**_

_** I hope you laughed and/or enjoyed…**_

_**Uh oh… the actions picking up…**_

_**Alrighty let's see if we can get to… 270 for an update tomorrow?**_

_**Can you do it? Yeah you can! What'd you think?**_


	12. Chapter 12

**Thanks to: Music ADD, Inserthilariousnamehere, BMontague, dowlingnana (Seriously, you are too sweet! Thank you), dazzleglo, melissamary55, Twifan1986, rlwoods, Cockerspanmom, steph A15, DenisseSchmidt, dr. meow1234, ADADancer, MaryMary123, kelliekinz, totes. Mah. Gotes, kembie, Kgunter34, clickchick18 and luv2dance. You all make my day with your reviews and the more they come the more I want to write.**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies**

…TEC…

I stood and Edward handed me Seth before picking up Ellie, who buried her face in his neck. I looked to Edward for an answer on Riley's question.

"I'm not sure but let's not take our chances by staying here." I nodded, "Tanya will you go see about buying that tree while I get them to the car? I'll be in soon." She nodded and quickly went off to get a sales man's attention.

"Mommy? Are you okay?" Ellie asked as Seth inspected my face with his small hands.

"I'm okay." I assured before kissing Seth's face and holding him close, Edward's eyes met mine and he walked a little bit closer to me as we made our way to the car. He helped me strap them both in, as I was shaking too hard to get it done by myself, once we had shut the door and I was making my way to the passenger seat he grabbed my wrist, pulling me into his chest.

"You sure you're okay?"

"_I'm_ fine… That woman though… She was losing blood so quickly."

"She'll be okay, Baby. You probably saved her life. You were amazing out there, beautiful." He kissed my forehead and held me tightly to his body.

"They were after Riley?"

"I don't think that was an attempt to kill him, per say, more like a warning." He said quietly as people swarmed around us, "We'll talk about this at home. I'll be back." He kissed my chastely before going to Tanya, I slid into the car and turned around to check on the kids.

"Are you all right?" Ellie nodded and Seth was still quiet, I was surprised that he wasn't a waterfall of tears right now, but he was too young to understand what was going on anyway. The door next to Ellie's car seat opened and Riley slid in, before laying a hand on my shoulder.

"You okay?" I nodded and put my hand over his for a second before we both let go. Edward and Tanya, escorted by two burly men carrying our big ass tree, approached the car. Edward crooked two fingers, asking me to join them and I stepped out of the car.

"What's up?" I placed my hands on my hips.

"We made need to move Alec." Tanya said pulling out her phone.

"Oh is there an app for that?" I deadpanned. Edward gave me an incredulous look.

"Sorry. Sorry." I put up my hands and blushed, Tanya rolled her eyes. "Seriously though, we can't keep running from these people. Are you all actually trying to find these people? Or are you just planning on playing witness protection for the rest of his life?" They both scowled down at me.

_Fucking giants._

"What? He can't stay with us forever, and I'm sure he doesn't want to spend his life running." Tanya sighed and looked around.

"Can we talk about this at your place? I don't think this is the proper setting." She looked over to the two men who were finished with loading up the tree and just staring at us now.

"I'm sorry, can I _help_ you?" I held out my hands and they gaped at me before moving on.

Tanya sighed, "I'll meet you at the station Edward." He nodded and we dispersed into our separate cars.

…TEC…

EPOV

"Who the hell would have known that we were going _today_ to go tree shopping?" I asked as Emmett, Charlie, Tanya, Crowley, Newton and I sat in the briefing room around the large table.

"Who all did you talk to after deciding to go shopping?" Mike questioned.

"No one… I didn't even know about it until this morning. The only people I saw after we agreed to go today were Tanya, Riley and Bella."

"And his kids."

"Yes, Tanya. But I strongly doubt Seth is trying to get Alec killed." I shot her a glare.

"What do you think, Masen?" The chief asked.

"Someone had to be trailing us. That or Tanya tipped someone off." I said like the dick I was.

She gasped, "Well I never!"

"Yes. But what are we going to do about Alec? Do you really think it's the best idea to keep him with your family? With _my daughter and grandkids?_" His eyes narrowed at me and I clenched my jaw.

"I'm not sure, Charlie. Riley being with two trained agents makes more sense than him continuously running."

"Here's what I'm thinking Masen; You and Bella have two small children and you obviously aren't paying enough attention, or you wouldn't have been _shot at_ this morning." Chief growled, my jaw ticked as his voice rose to a scream.

"They came out of nowhere, Chief. There is no fucking way any of us could have known they were coming."

"Yeah, Masen. There is a way. Pay attention, damn it! You have more to worry about than this Alec kid. You also have a family to protect-"

"Chief I fully understand that-"

"Let me talk damn it! If I don't have any leads on who those trigger happy bastards are I'm giving the case to Newton. You understand?" I nodded and sighed as the meeting was dismissed.

"Looks like I'm about to have to save the day… again." Newton sighed in mock exasperation before pushing away from the table.

"No. It looks like you're going to have to shut the fuck up. You talk too much, asshole." He smirked at me and I went to leave the bureau but I was stopped by the chief.

"I'm not done with you, Masen."

…TEC…

BPOV

"_I do believe in spooks! I do believe in spooks… I do I do I do!_" The cowardly lion whimpered pathetically on T.V. Ellie was curled up next to me, while Seth threw around some Legos at the foot of the couch. Riley sat on the recliner next to the couch quietly. He was obviously still shaken about what had happened this morning.

"How- How did they know that I would be there? Don't understand…" He muttered to himself as he wrung his hands. "What if they followed us here?" I turned and put a hand on his.

"They didn't tail us here. I checked. You will be fine. I promise." Ellie shifted so that her head was in my lap and I rubbed her head. The garage door opened and slammed against the wall, causing all of us to hit the floor. Ellie grabbed onto the ponytail holder in my hair and set the wild ass mane free.

"Fucking great." Edward grumbled, there were multiple slams and I popped up from in front of the couch.

"Oh hey, Baby!" I said before running a hand through my hair, Riley sat up next to me and Edwards face cleared of all emotion.

"I'm sorry, am I interrupting something?" He gestured to us and I pulled Seth up into view.

"Don't be a dick." I said simply before helping Ellie up. I knew that we didn't look to promising with the position we were in, what with my sex hair and the two of us on the floor together. Edward huffed and threw his jacket over the kitchen chair. I stood and went to where he was.

"What's wrong?" I put my hand between his shoulder blades and kissed his shoulder.

"They want to move Riley."

"You knew that it could happen…"

"Well there's more. Tanya and Newton, they'll be staying for nights, until the move. Oh! I also have to have a lead on who shot at us by the end of the week. Which may I add is fucking _tomorrow_?" He growled.

"What the hell?"

"I know. How the fuck am I supposed to get a lead by tomorrow?"

"Those asses are staying with us?" I shrieked.

"Holy shit!" My head turned to see Ellie standing on the couch, attempting to slide behind it. She was spazzing out as she stared at the _Wizard of Oz_ in fright.

"Ellie! Watch your language!" I pointed to the steps.

"Okay come on, Mommy… Have you _seen_ those monkeys?" She screamed before falling off of the couch. "Mother of hell!" She screamed and I palmed my forehead.

"Damn it, Elizabeth. Time out. Go now!" Edward barked, she jumped up and ran for the steps and hell even I jumped.

"Have you lost your mind?" I hissed at him before slapping his chest.

"Bella, I am _not _in the mood."

"Guess it's a good thing I'm not trying to fuck you then." I rolled my eyes.

He narrowed his eyes and shook his head at me, "Bella, can you stop with the comedy routine?"

"Yeah. As soon as you stop being an ass." He scoffed and went to stomp out of the room when I grabbed his shirt, holding him in place and looking over his shoulder to see Riley's eyes on us. I brushed of his shoulder and touched his face.

"You're blowing this out of proportion." I said through my teeth, running my thumb over his cheek bone. He groaned and pushed my hand off of his face. I grabbed the front of his shirt and met his eyes.

"Edward-"

"No. What the fuck? I may lose my fucking job, Bella. Where will we be then? Huh?" He pulled my hands off of his shirt and brushed past me and out of the room.

I ran a hand through my hair and sighed, I went to scratch my cheek when I realized that I was crying. "What the hell?" I felt arms surround me and looked up to see Riley.

"Are you okay?" I swiped at my eyes and scoffed at myself before chuckling weakly.

"I'm fine; I must be on my period." His arms loosened and he stepped back as if my PMS-ing was going to shock him. He settled for rubbing my arm gently.

"What's up with Edward?" He asked looking toward the archway that Edward had left.

I shrugged, "He's worried about this whole case. Apparently Charlie has him on a short ass leash about the case."

"You're father Charlie?" I nodded, "Why don't you just talk to your dad about it then?"

"It's Charlie. Even my word wouldn't have any kind of impact."

"Not Daddies little princess huh?" I furrowed my eyebrows.

"No… It was different in my house. Like, instead of Daddy's princess it was more like Daddy's favorite animal at the zoo." Riley nodded and laughed lightly.

"I would still try though."

"I guess…" I patted his shoulder and moved around him, "I'm going to bed, see you in the morning." He nodded and we split, I sighed as I made my way up the steps, or attempted to, as I tripped over the first step.

"Now see, I know you and Daddy are mad at me…" Ellie's voice scarred the shit out of me, and I looked down at my feet to see her holding her leg. "But I _promise_ child abuse isn't the answer. Daddy already kicked me once!" I crouched down and rubbed her leg before kissing her kneecap.

"I'm sorry, Pumpkin. I didn't see you; I forgot that you were here…"

_Oh shit… Seth…_

"Where's Seth? Is he still in the living room?"

"Okay yeah break my leg and think about Baby." She rolled her eyes, "Daddy took him upstairs." I smiled, kissing her head before hugging her tightly.

"Go on up to sleep, and for the love of god, Watch your mouth." She grinned at me and darted up the steps, with me on her heels. We had made it about three fourths of the way up the steps when the doorbell rang. Ellie and I both froze before I reached for my ankle holster.

"You go on up to sleep, alright?" She nodded and shot up the steps when she saw the gun. I swiftly descended the steps and peeked through the peephole to see someone's fucking neck.

_Why the hell does everyone stand so fucking close to that thing?_

I laid the gun on the wall so that it was out of sight when I opened the door, before pulling the door open.

"Hello, Lover."

"I didn't know he meant this staying the night thing started today…" I curled a lip at Newton's acknowledgement. I moved the gun from the wall into their view and the two of them were off of the porch so quickly that I had to remind myself that they were actually there in the first place.

"Swan… Baby… just put the gun down. I'm sure that whatever's wrong we can fix it." Mike shrieked from the darkened yard.

"Michael if you call me anything but Bella or Swan I'm going to shove your _own_ fucking foot down your throat."

"Hey if this is about what happened this morning… I won't hit on your husband anymore, hell I'll even stop sleeping with him." I glared blindly at the lying bitch and considered actually aiming the gun at her stupid ass. I silently strapped the gun back onto my ankle and turned on the porch light to see them. Mike stood a few feet away from the porch and Tanya was crouched behind one of the bushes lining the path.

"Tanya. If you were sleeping with my husband, I wouldn't _shoot_ you." I smiled and rolled my eyes. "I would fuck you up with my bare hands. Don't play." She smiled at me hesitantly and walked up behind Mike, grabbing his coat and then approaching the door behind him. I stepped aside so that they could come in and saw the porch light from the house next to us flick on.

I hurriedly pulled my pant leg down over the gun and stepped out to greet Jessie. "Hey, Jess! How are you?" Tanya and Mike peered around my porch into the darkness looking for my apparently nonexistent neighbor.

"I think she's finally lost her shit, Newton." Tanya hissed from behind me, I stood in the darkness and waited for Jessie to leave his doorway. First came his cane and then his fragile little body. "She's like that guy from _Beautiful Mind_ you know… minus the beautiful mind part."

"Isabella? Are you alright? I saw some people-" He looked at my porch and pointed at Tanya and Mike. "Them. Ya' damn scoundrels! Who do you think you are sneaking around this nice young lady's yard?" I laughed lightly as he pointed his cane at them.

"Hey, Jessie." Edward's voice rang out from the porch and he stepped out from behind Tanya and Mike. "Is everything alright?"

Jessie huffed, "These two kids were sneaking around your home… Bothering poor Isabella here." I put my hand to my chest and fluttered my eye lashes at Jessie, who smiled back at me.

"Thanks, but these are my… cousins. Yeah… they like to give Bella here a hard time." Edward wrapped an arm around my shoulders and I curled a lip at him but was curtained by the darkness. "Thank you though, for watching out for Bella." Jessie smiled at me again.

"Oh no problem. You should keep better watch of that one." I heard an annoyed huff from the porch and saw Tanya go in the house followed by Mike.

Edward grinned at the older gentleman, "I will."

"Alright, kiddos. I'm going to turn in, it's past my bedtime." He chuckled before winking.

"Bye, Jessie." He waved once more and went into the house.

_Gah, I loved that guy._

"He's so sweet." My smile faded as I looked up to Edward, "They don't make 'em like that anymore." I pushed his arm away and he caught my waist. I brushed him off and headed for the house. I pushed past him and went into the house.

He called after me, "Baby wait-" I headed up the steps and stopped when I saw Tanya standing in the opening between the foyer and dining room, holding my yogurt and a spoon.

"Bella, I'm sorry." Edward closed the front door and I continued up the steps.

"Trouble in paradise?" Tanya cackled and then Newton was in front of me. "Oh Edward? I think I may have a lead for you."

"Perfect." He said excitedly dropping all thought of me.

"What the hell are you doing up here? Fucking creep." I growled at Mike before clutching my chest.

"Hey I was checking for bugs, babe." He gestured at his ear, to show me he didn't mean actual bugs, but listening devices. "Not sniffing your underwear or anything." I rolled my eyes and looked over the railing to see Edward and Tanya deep in conversation. Shows how important apologizing was to him. "Even though I would much rather the latter." Newton winked and I turned and pushed him against the small wall, supporting the railing.

"Shut the hell up, Newton. Don't fuck with me." I said seriously, "Pervert."

"I like it rough, Baby." He smirked at me and wrapped his arms around my waist. I smiled back at him before hitching my leg and throwing my knee into his side.

"You know you have a lot of nerve." I growled, he flipped us so that I was pressed against the wall.

"Mmm feisty," I dropped my head against the wall in exasperation, but of course being the phenomenal actress I was I passed it off as a seductive gesture.

"Gosh Mike. I've been trying to fight this since day one…"

He smiled and leaned his head into my neck, "Give in, Babe." You see I had decided to take it easy on him earlier, when he spoke about sniffing my underwear. I swear though, this ass just couldn't take a hint. So he can take something else.

I spread my thighs slightly and he peeked around the pillar to where Edward and Tanya stood before maneuvering a leg between mine.

"Two words. Dumb ass." I used all of my strength to connect my thigh to his balls. He let out a high pitched squeal before immediately falling to the ground. Riley's door opened at the sound and when he saw Mike hit the ground his eyes widened. I smiled at him before looking back over the railing at Edward.

"Hey, Honey? Your cousin may need some help up here."

…TEC…

**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**

**Remember your reviews are the fuel to keep this finely tuned story up and running… keep them coming! – Deep thoughts… well you know as deep as they'll get coming from ****mio**** :D**

**So I have a dilemma. I can't seem to find any stories that hold my interest :( If you have any story recommendations I would LOVE to hear them. I only read Edward and Bella though…**

**So I read a horoscope that said my lucky hour would be two. It's two where I am and I would consider myself **_**really**_** lucky if I got a ton of reviews… *wink/cough* Hint. Hint. *wink/cough***

**Umm… If we reach 290 reviews I will update tomorrow!**


	13. Chapter 13

**Thanks to: melissamary55, MaryMary123, SweetPJL, The Elegance Of The Lion, steph A15, Pianogirl05, DenisseSchmidt, Twifan1986, lyricalgirl0521, dowlingnana, JokersParadise, JokersParadise, blue eyes lover , alc1002, Yummy dummy, Inserthilariousnamehere, kembie, katiesparks21, dr. meow1234, dazzleglo, totes .mah .gotes, rlwoods, 4Ever, Kgunter34, ADADancer, Cockerspanmom, roseta2 and vampirelove11. **

**You are all so sweet! Thank you very much!**

…TEC…

"Mommy…" Ellie whined as we trudged through the heavy snow.

_Not one of my best ideas._

"Can we go home? I'm tired." She tugged on my hand before falling face first into about a foot of snow. I picked her up by the waist and she brushed off her face angrily before scowling at me.

"I didn't do anything to you." I said defensively as her face turned red from the temperature.

"Home?"

"We're going home, Ellie." I sighed and held her hand as we walked farther down the street next to ours. "Anyway you're the one that wanted to come with me, so hush." I narrowly dodged a telephone pole and walked on a little bit further when I noticed that my kid was gone. I immediately looked to the snow, hoping that she didn't get buried.

"Oh shit..." I groaned when I didn't see her, the sound of her jacket crinkling made me look up. Ellie was about three feet behind me, holding onto the telephone pole like it was her lifeline. "What are you doing?"

"Sydney told me that if I hold onto a pole, a stranger will come and take me home." She said before pressing her cheek to the wood.

"Take you home with them. Come on, Ellie." I said before pulling my hat over my ears, a large van drove by and an obese man leered at her. I flipped him off, "What the fuck?" I yelled at the van before it sped up just a little.

"You can go on. I'll be fine here." She closed her eyes and tightened her arm on the pole. I shrugged and kept walking, expecting her to follow. Almost ten yards away from the pole I turned to see her still holding on for dear life.

"What the hell?" I grumbled before raising my voice so she could hear me. "Ellie! Get over here, we're going home… come on now…" Hell I was cold too. I also happened to be wearing inappropriate footwear, the snow soaked through my gym shoes.

'_Exercise' purposes._

"I'm tired, and cold!" She yelled back at me with a slight whine.

"You don't want me to call Daddy do you?" I asked holding up my cell phone.

"Please? I want him to come pick me up!" I put my hands on my hips and gave her the bitch brow.

"Ellie!"

"But-" I stomped dramatically and pointed at the ground next to me. "Fine…" She huffed before trudging her way towards me.

"I _told_ you that it was going to be cold. I _told_ you to stay home."

"But it wasn't cold then."

"We were _inside_, Ellie." She frowned and stomped up to me before grabbing my hand angrily. Which was something that was hard to make intimidating.

"I'm telling on you."

"Congratulations."

"Wait, I won't tell on you if you give me a cookie."

"You're going to blackmail me?"

"Depends."

"On what?"

"What blackmail means." I rolled my eyes. "Can we decorate the tree when we get home?" The change of subject confused me for a second.

"Um… Yeah sure?" She smiled and we rounded the corner to our street and she yelled with happiness.

"Next time you go exercise can we bring the car?"

"That wouldn't be exercise." She shrugged and darted into our yard, running to the door and falling on her ass when she realized that it wasn't unlocked. The door opened about a minute later and Riley peered out at her before picking her up.

My lip quivered as I attempted to stifle my laughter, "Are you okay, Honey?" She nodded and cupped her forehead before Alec took her inside. "Thanks." I muttered before pushing the door open for them.

"No problem. How was your walk?" I shrugged and Ellie decided to go on a tangent about how strangers weren't as nice as this Sydney said they were, while we removed our damp clothing.

"I was holding onto the pole and I put my leg up but-" I shook my head and heard a few erratic steps before looking up and seeing Edward turn and go back up the steps.

He stood at the top of the staircase. "I'm going to try again." I chuckled and Ellie blushed.

"It wasn't like that, Daddy. I was trying to pick up strangers… Silly." She giggled and Edward covered his ears.

"No, I really don't want to hear about this…" He groaned.

She met him at the end of the steps, "Will you help me decorate the tree? I need someone to reach the tall parts but Mommy's… you know." She stooped down and whispered, "Short."

"I'm not short. I only look short because the rest of you people are fuc- freaking huge." I smirked at Ellie who was fully prepared to hold out her hand and get that dollar.

"How tall are you?"

"Five nine and three quarters." I boasted proudly, like a three year old. She came and patted my hand sympathetically, before looking up to her 6'3 father.

"She really thinks she's tall. Poor girl." I frowned and huffed. Ellie grabbed Edwards hand and dragged him into the front room, where our eight foot tree sat.

"Did you two make up?" Alec asked referring to Edward and me. I shrugged.

"So who are the people staying with us now? Edward's cousins?" I shook my head.

"No, they're agents too. They decided that you need more protection than the two of us." He furrowed his eyebrows and sighed. I patted his shoulder before standing and heading into the living room to join in with the decorating.

…TEC…

"Mommy? Baby's eating the tree." Ellie said nonchalantly as she hung more ornaments on the tree. I looked over to see Seth chewing on the cord between the unhung lights.

"No no, Honey." I said gently before tugging the cord from out of his teeth, he screamed when the lights were finally out of his mouth and banged on the walker. "Seth…" I pulled him to my chest and sat on the couch with him before giving him the bottle that sat on the side table. He chewed the fuck out of the nipple on the bottle and I groaned.

"Edward will you get the teething ring and put it in the freezer?" He nodded and I let Seth play with my finger and try to bite the hell out of it. I bounced him on my knee and attempted to take his mind off of the pain when Edward reappeared with a tube of something.

He held his hands out for Seth and I passed him on, "Here you go, little guy." He whispered when Seth crying got louder. He squirted whatever the hell that was onto his finger and rubbed it on Seth's gums.

Ellie walked up and wrinkled her nose at us, "What are you doing?"

"He's teething. Daddy's helping his mouth to stop hurting."

"You never did that for me!" She gasped as Seth's cries slowly died down.

Edward looked at her through his lashes, "Yes, I did." He shook his head and sat back when he was done letting Seth rest on his chest. Seth laid his head on Edwards shoulder and he played with the collar of his shirt.

She huffed, "You guys are always staring at Baby. He's not that great. He doesn't do anything but poop, cry and sleep." She curled a lip at Seth as he drifted off to sleep on Edward.

"Ellie-"

She cut me off and pouted at me, "You never play with me anymore." She looked between the two of us and I opened my arms so that she could crawl into my lap. She obliged and I kissed the top of her head.

"Honey, I took you out this morning. Daddy spent just as much time with you when you were a Baby." I said before biting my lip and stroking her hair. She hugged me tightly.

"So I have to be a baby again, for you to like me?"

"Ellie we love you and we always will." Edward said softly, before laying Seth on his stomach, on the blanket on the floor. He pulled Ellie's feet into his lap and she sighed.

A bunch of emotions flitted across her face before she settled on disgust. "What's wrong?"

"I miss Aunt Alice… Mommy how old are you before you start bleeding?" I blushed. "Like period."

"I don't know… Why?"

"It makes you crazy right?"

"I mean-"

"Oh my god. I'm perioding!" I laughed at the shocked look on her face. "I knew it. See, 'cause I don't _like_ Aunt Alice." She sighed in relief and looked up to Edward I followed her line of sight and laughed. Edward sat with wide eyes and his hands in his hair.

"Oh god… Not another one." He whispered, his hand scrubbed at his face as if he tried to wipe the last minute of our conversation out of his head.

"She's joking, Baby." I said, rubbing his arm.

_Poor guy._

Ellie's eyes went wide before she shot up and swung her legs out of Edwards lap, "I gotta' potty!" She squealed before rushing out of the room.

Edward grabbed my leg, turning me on the couch so that I lay on my back, with him between my legs, after making sure Ellie was gone. "Woah, what the hell?"

He held my face between his hands, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have snapped at you yesterday."

"I agree." He frowned at me and I stared right back at him, before cracking a smile. Edward grinned back and pecked my lips.

"I love you." He whispered before kissing down my neck. We must PMS at the same time, because only difference between us this week was that I bled. "Wanna fuck?"

"Well, when you say it all romantical like that it just makes my insides melt. Of course I do!" I said in a cheesy voice, his brain must have been clouded by how horny he was though because he immediately dove for my pants. "Edward. No." His head snapped up and he pouted at me. "Not with Ellie and Seth here."

He bit his lip in thought, "The bathroom?"

"No… not even the bathroom." I shook my head.

He pouted, "Ellie's around the corner. Seth is _right there._" I hissed, he kissed me deeply and grinded his hips into mine. "She's just using the bathroom."

"She'll be in there for a while."

"How do you know?"

"Did'ju see here face? That was her poop face and she said 'I gotta potty.' Not 'I gotta pee' which is what she usually says." His hand slid up to cup my breast and I squirmed, while arousal pooled between my thighs.

"Gah, you make me feel like I'm cheating on her." I muttered, as he kissed down my chest and unbuttoned the top of my shirt. He smirked and slipped his hand into my shirt and pushing the cup of my bra down so that he could wrap his lips around my hard as rock, nipple. I let out a breathy pant and he sucked gently. I tossed my head back when two things happened at once; he sucked too hard on my nipple and got some of my _essence_ and Ellie appeared in the doorway.

My hands wrapped in Edwards hair and I pulled him up to my level roughly as he gagged at the taste of my milk. Ellie was adjusting her belt and didn't realize that Mommy and Daddy weren't doing appropriate Mommy and Daddy activities. While she fumbled with her belt, I fumbled with the buttons on my shirt. I wasn't sure if Edward hadn't realized that Ellie stood there or what, because he set to work on my neck again.

"Stop." I hissed before slipping from under him, and attempted to right myself on the couch. I then realized that we hadn't done anything about finding a lead.

"Don't we need to be talking about finding a lead?" I whispered before reaching up to run a hand through his hair.

"No. Tanya had gotten the license plate on the car. The car was linked and registered to the dumbass."

"Well who is it?"

"Some asshole hit man. He is an assassin, not a good one though. They just deployed some guys to go and track down this guy and question him."

"You've already told, Charlie?" He nodded. There were three loud knocks on the door and Edward jumped up to answer it. There was some conversing and then Edward reentered the room looking disgruntled.

He narrowed his eyes at Ellie, "There's a _boy _here to see you. Who does he think he is? I should have got my gun." He trailed off as he plopped down next to me. Ellie peeked down the foyer before yelling.

"Embry! Daddy why is he still out on the doorstep?" She huffed, she jumped up to get the door and let him in.

I smirked at Edward, "You were going to threaten a seven year old. Look at you my macho man." I said sarcastically before patting his stomach. The two kids entered the room and Embry gave Edward a scared look.

"Hi, Embry. I'm Mrs. Masen." The little boy smiled shyly and blushed.

"Well aren't you adorable?" Alice said from the kitchen entry way. I jumped at the sound of her voice, "Is this your boyfriend, Ellie?" They looked at each other and stuck their tongues out in disgust, while Edward lurched forward.

"No!" I grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back down.

"Can we play outside?" Embry asked, giving me a pointed glance which clearly said he was talking to me.

"Yes," Ellie squealed before grabbing his hand and pulling him out of the living room, before she went into the kitchen she gave Alice a light hug before curling her lip and turning to Embry.

"You know, I'm perioding."

"My dad said play time is over when you period."

"You period too?" This conversation was slightly horrifying.

"I don't think so. I was bleeding yesterday though… I cut my arm on the table." He twisted his arm to show her his SpongeBob bandaid.

"So you do period? Cool…" Their voices faded away and I hung my head.

"My little girls growing up." Edward whined before burying his head in my neck.

Alice shook her head, "You guys are lucky that you haven't been charged with corruption of a minor. It's too late for that one."

…TEC…

**I hope you enjoyed and/or laughed!**

**SO HERE'S THE THING: Tehe just wanted your attention :D I wrote two completely different versions of this chapter and if you follow me on Twitter you already know that I think both of them aren't that great… But I had to post one and I kind of thought this one was more relevant to the characters and what not (As in the other one was almost just random shit about sexual things…? Yeah I know) but… To be honest I thought they both were like 'Ehh…' If you want to see the second version just leave a NICE review saying so, like no:**

"**Ay. What the fuck was that? Are you fuh real? Post the second one."**

**That's just not nice.**

**But you all reached the goal and I needed to keep my promise of posting a chapter!**

**Let's get to 320…? For an update tomorrow **

**Yes?**

**Oh yes.**


	14. Alternate Chapter 13

**You all are seriously amazing. Thanks for all of the reviews and words of encouragement :D Here is the alternative chapter thirteen. The beginning part starts off right where chapter twelve ended. There is parts of this chapter that I took out and put in the last chapter also, so if you see those you know what happened.**

**Thanks to: new reader, Yummy dummy, twilight642531, dr .meow1234, koleen05, Cockerspanmom, DenisseSchmidt,** **melissamary55, rlwoods, Ellelovesedward, A.L. Matherne, Pianogirl05, dowlingnana, stacy924, katiesparks21, kembie, Kgunter34, alc1002, dazzleglo, iloveChiodosXD, luv2dance, Melnaugh, kelliekinz, steph A15 and Heartbrokentears.**

**Your reviews really made me smile!**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies**

…TEC…

_**Chapter 13 (alternate version)**_

_***"Two words. Dumb ass." I used all of my strength to connect my thigh to his balls. He let out a high pitched squeal before immediately falling to the ground. Riley's door opened at the sound and when he saw Mike hit the ground his eyes widened. I smiled at him before looking back over the railing at Edward.**_

"_**Hey, Honey? Your cousin may need some help up here."***_

I jerked my head to Newton who lay at my feet. Edward sighed and came up the steps quickly. He didn't spare a glance at Newton instead wrapping his arm around my waist and lifting me over his shoulder and taking me into the bedroom.

He tossed me on the bed and held my face between his hands, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have snapped at you."

"I agree." He frowned at me and I stared right back at him, before cracking a smile. Edward grinned back and pecked my lips.

"I love you." He whispered before kissing down my neck. We must PMS at the same time, only difference between us this week was that I bled. "Wana fuck?"

"Well, when you say it all romantical like that it just makes my insides melt. Of course I do!" I said in a cheesy voice, his brain must have been clouded by how horny he was though because he immediately dove for my pants. "Edward. No." His head snapped up and he pouted at me. "Not with Newton here."

He bit his lip in thought, "The bathroom?"

"No… not even the bathroom." I shook my head.

"Please… I'll eat you out." I blushed.

"How old are you? Thirteen? Dear goodness. Get off of me." I laughed, he frowned.

"God you pull out all of the big stops and just get _shut down_." He looked so damned sad I had to laugh.

"I'm sorry, Baby. Maybe later?"

"I won't be in the mood later." He whined before rolling off of me and lying next to me with his arms folded over his chest.

"Looks like you're out of luck."

"Never mind! I lied; I'm never not in the mood." I sat up and patted his chest.

"I know." I grinned and he huffed.

"Always have to do everything for myself." He groaned before lifting his hips and sliding his sweat pants over them, to reveal that he was going commando under the baggy material. "Unless…" He raised an eyebrow at me.

"You wana give Daddy a little something for apologizing?" I furrowed my eyebrows.

"No thanks, _Daddy_. I'm fine." I leaned over and kissed him anyway.

His hand turned and grabbed a bottle of lube from the dresser, and applying it to his hands and then dick. I bit my lip as I watched his hand run up and down his length.

His eyes were trained on me as he got himself off, "Come on, Baby, you know you want to." He wiggled his eyebrows and gave two hard tugs on his dick, making me practically salivate. This man was fucking gorgeous. Everything about him was including his massive cock.

"No… no. Nope." I popped the 'P' and pulled out a book from my night stand.

"Come on, Baby. Give me something to work with? Unbutton your shirt, spread your legs?"

"No. What is it with you? Do you get off on having sex with other people in the house?"

"At the moment I'm not getting off at all." He groaned as the jerking got harder.

"Oh… I know what your issue is! You're on your period!"

"Yep."

"Backdoor."

"Hell no."

"Please?"

"The fuck? It's called a back door for a reason."

"_Baby_…"

"Edward. No."

"It'd be just like it'd be in the front door."

"Except completely different."

"Bella… It won't hurt with enough lube."

"Ugh that's just nasty, so I can be leaking lube and jizz from my ass?"

"Hey at least I would get to jizz."

"Not in my ass you won't!"

"Bella what are you saving it for anyway? God gave you an ass for a reason."

"That reason is to shit, Edward."

"The shit talk is really ruining the mood."

"Yeah, talking about shit grosses you out. But you want to stick your dick in the source."

"I'll love you forever."

"No."

"Come on… Don't make me suffer because you have to."

"Oh yeah that makes me want to let you in the trap door."

"Really?"

"No."

"Bella!" I groaned and moved to kneel between his open legs.

"If I blow you will you shut up?" He nodded happily and reached to unbutton my shirt. I ran my thumb over his slit and collected some of the KY jelly on my thumb.

"Is this edible?" He nodded, I was almost positive he just said yes because he wanted my mouth on him. I lowered my head and took all of him into my mouth, going deep enough for his head to slide into my throat. I pulled all the way off of him and let go with a pop. Edward's hands were gripping the headboard so tight I thought he was going to break it. I ran my hand up and down his shaft again before tapping against my lips, his hips rolled just so and he was thrust into my mouth again. I trailed my tongue on the underside of his cock and massaged his balls lightly.

"Fuck yes… you look so good with my cock in your mouth, dirty girl." I held up a hand because it was beginning to be too much. I was getting horny.

_Really horny._

"Mmmm yes…" He moaned breathlessly. I moaned around his cock and then swallowed twice, causing him to shoot his hot essence down my throat. I swallowed as much of it as possible and used my right hand to assist in milking him. I writhed against my left hand excitedly.

"Looks like we should have just fucked, huh?" He asked with a dreamy smirk.

"Edward, I'm still on my period." He grabbed me under my arms and pulled me up next to him in the bed before thrusting against me roughly.

"Talk... Baby." I groaned as he tore my shit up.

"You like that, Baby? That warm pussy," He moaned and grabbed at my chest, roughly. "Dirty fucking slut. You looked so good with my dick in your mouth…" He raised my body and slipped a pillow under my back, and pushing my legs up, so that my ankles were up at his neck and grinded in _just the right spot_. "Cum for me, gorgeous." I fell over the edge and my eyes screwed shut, my hand flying into his hair as he rocked against me.

Edward pushed my hair away from my face and laid an open mouthed kiss on my neck.

"Love you, beautiful." He turned and rolled us so that I lay on his chest and kissed my forehead.

"Love you too," I turned to look up at his peaceful face, "Don't we need to be talking about finding a lead?" I whispered before reaching up to run a hand through his hair.

"No. Tanya had gotten the license plate on the car. The car was linked and registered to the dumbass."

"Well who is it?"

"Some asshole hit man. He is an assassin, not a good one though. They just deployed some guys to go and track down this guy and question him." I nodded and there was a hard knock on the door.

"Hold on!" I yelled, before buttoning up my shirt as Edward scrambled for his pants.

"You people are disgusting." Tanya grunted from the other side of the door, "You realize that you have company right? First you knock out my partner, and then you go and be as loud as possible while you fuck? Agh…" I went to the door when the both of us were semi descent and pulled it open.

"We weren't having sex." I rolled my eyes.

"Then that was some loud ass sleeping." She rolled her eyes and walked farther into the room, before backing out. "Not having sex my ass. It _smells_ like straight sex."

I shrugged, "We had sexual relations, technically. There was no penetration cause I riding the red sea-" Edward covered my mouth and turned me so that I stood behind him as he greeted Tanya.

"They got the guy. They just want to know if you want to question him personally." Edward nodded and she immediately typed something out on her phone.

"Can I do it too?" She shook her head but Edward shrugged.

"You can't actually be in there, not being an agent, Isabella. You should know that." Queue eye roll.

"You can watch from the screening room." Edward said over his shoulder. "Is that it?" He asked Tanya.

She nodded before seemingly changing her mind, "Do you two make it a habit to have _'sexual relations' _while others are here? I mean you guys aren't exactly church mice…" She glared at me like I was up here sexually relating with myself, I glared back at her.

"Yeah well we like to let everybody know how fucking amazing the sex is so-"

"Bye, Tanya." Edward cut me off and closed the door in her face before turning to me. "Have you no tact?"

"Nope." He smiled at me before wrapping his arms around my waist and kissing my shoulder.

…TEC…

**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**

**I told you this was random haha**

**Which version of chapter 13 did you like the best?**

**Let's get to 350? For an update tomorrow!**


	15. Chapter 14

**Thanks to:****melissamary55, koleen05, molliegoodgolly (I do know what you mean and I promise I will definitely work on that. ), Melnaugh, ADADancer, Karen, Yummy dummy, dowlingnana, alc1002, dr. meow1234, steph A15, Twifan1986, rlwoods, vampirelove11, iloveChiodosXD, totes. Mah. Gotes, aviator gal, DenisseSchmidt, clickchick18, luv2dance, roseta2, kelliekinz (I'm not sure about finishing my other stories…), dazzleglo, anonymous reviewer, and kembie. **

**READ! I decided that we are going to go off of the events that happened in the first chapter thirteen, so keep all of that in mind.**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC...

"Look. You are already going to jail for shooting at pedestrians and manslaughter. So why the _fuck_ don't you just tell us who asked you to shoot at the tree display?" Edward slammed his hands on the small metal table and leaned over it. In the chair opposite Edward sat a greasy balding man that was missing a tooth or two. The little woman that I tried to help at the tree stand passed away shortly after we left, due to loss of blood

"I told you man. I wasn't shooting at a fucking display." The man growled leaning forward in his chair as Edward got in his face. I swear I almost started humping the chair, watching my husband be all powerful and shit. That coupled with my being on my period just fucking set me off. "I don't even know the guy's name. I was given a description, time and place. That's it. I don't know the name of the guy who sent me." The man turned his head to rub his chin on his shoulder, essentially removing the sweat there too.

"So you went out and just shot at anyone that…?" He looked down at the notepad in his hand, and his jaw ticked and I shifted. "Had medium to short brown hair… So you could have shot at anyone? You could have shot at me! Oh wait…" Edward's voice rose to a scream and the man cowered away. "You did shoot at me! And my wife and my children. Why? Because you're a dumbass who goes on random killing sprees. But even you don't look stupid enough to take directions from some random person… For no reason." he glanced down at the pad and glared once more at the jackass sitting handcuffed to the chair. The man looked to have qualms about shooting at his current harasser.

"Looks can be deceiving." The man laughed from his chair, Edward slammed the notebook onto the table and got in the guy's face again.

"Look. I have given you all of my patience. Which is a lot more than what you deserve. Now tell me who the fuck put you up to this?" Edward growled lowly. The man shrugged and shook his head and Edward rolled up his sleeve.

"Hey, get someone in there. Now!" Emmett barked from behind me, "Get Masen out before he's charged himself." The vein in Edwards head protruded and a warm feeling spread through my stomach.

"Where do you fucking get off shooting at people for no fucking reason and not only that but shooting at women and children? You're fucking sick, bastard." The man laughed and Edward walked backwards and pinched the bridge of his nose before smiling, but it was more like a I'm going to kill you smile that a lets hug smile.

"Consider yourself fucking lucky that you're getting off with manslaughter charge. If it were me deciding on what to do with your good for nothing ass I would have._ Fucked. You. Up_. And then sent you to jail."

_Oh shit, looks like it's time for a change of underwear._

"Get the fuck in there!" Emmett roared, Crowley sighed and stood.

"Can't we just let him hit the guy? I'll say I never saw it." I shrugged; Emmett shook his head at me. Crowley sent me a short smile before entering the interrogation room with Edward.

"Bella you get him out of here. We don't want any more trouble." I nodded and stood to meet Edward as he left the interrogation room, wrapping an arm around his waist. I kissed his cheek and rubbed his back.

"Fucking jackass." He let me go for a second so that he could pull on his coat and pack up his briefcase, before pulling me back against him. Holding me there tightly. There was a hard vibration against my hip and he let me go to reach into his pocket, he glanced at the display before smiling and flipping it open.

"Carmen?" A voice filtered through the speaker and his smile got impossibly wider. His eyes shifted to me and I cocked my head in confusion.

"Well you know we're in Portland now-" He stopped and the voice on the phone got louder and Edward chuckled softly.

"How soon?" The voice rambled on quickly and even though I couldn't understand what she said she sure as hell was excited.

"Carm-" He stopped and looked at me.

"Yeah she's here-"

"But-" He stopped and sighed as the voice stopped sounding as happy. Edward sighed one more and handed me the phone.

"Bella?" A high pitched voice squeaked from the speaker.

"_Who is Carmen?_" I mouthed to Edward, he just shrugged and gestured to the phone.

I huffed before putting it to my ear, "Carmen?"

"Hi honey! Oh god, I've _missed _you! How are Seth and Ellie? Oh she's probably gotten so big! I shouldn't have gone on that damned Europe trip. But hey, when in Rome, right? How are Renee and Charlie? Oh what about Emmett? Such a sweet boy… How was your Thanksgiving? I wish I had been there!" The woman gushed excitedly; I opened and closed my mouth a few times, thinking that I could possibly get a word in.

"It was-" I started, but she continued to talk and Edward chuckled as he opened the car door for me.

"Oh you sound great, dear! I wish I could see you and my Edward."

"_Let the kid speak will you?_" A deep voice grumbled from behind her.

"Hush Eleazar!" She scolded, before going on again. I muted the phone and turned to Edward after putting her on speaker and waiting for a break in her words.

"Who is she?" I asked as soon as he was seated next to me.

He squinted at me, "You really don't know who you're talking to?" I shook my head, "That's my aunt. You met her before and at the wedding…"

"Oh…"

"_Just got back from Paris and ready to come visit you all! I can't wait._" She stopped talking and my head swung in Edward's direction.

"Um… yeah…" I said softly.

"_Bella?_"

"Oh, yeah I can't wait, Carmen." I said with a little more enthusiasm.

"Oh no… Is this not alright with you? I told that boy to make sure it was okay with you if we came by for Christmas!"

"No! It's fine."

"Maybe she hung up on me, Eleazar." She sounded so sad and I gave Edward a 'What the Fuck' look. He was over in his side of the car immersed in laughter. I huffed at him and he touched the phone quickly.

"Bella? I see that you didn't hang up!" She screeched.

"No- Yeah we're all very excited to have you, Carmen."

"She accidentally pressed the mute button, Car." Edward chuckled before starting up the car and pulling out of the parking lot like a bat out of hell. Carmen and I chatted for a short while longer before bidding each other good-bye.

…TEC…

"Wake up..." I shook Edwards shoulder roughly; he groaned and threw an arm around me, pulling me down so that I lay next to him before pressing me against his body.  
>He groaned in my ear, "Shhh..." I chuckled and slapped at his chest.<br>"We need to go shopping." His eyes opened and locked on mine, I through my leg over his hip and pressed my chest against his.  
>"Last time I heard that we were shot at." I frowned and he sighed. "Too soon?" I nodded and he sat up.<br>"What are we shopping for this time?" I trailed my fingers through his hair.  
>"Presents..." He sighed and I laid a kiss on his neck.<br>"Do I have to go?"  
>"Yes." He huffed and sat up before heading into the bathroom. About a minute later he popped back out. "Why don't you take Riley with you instead? I'll stay here with the kids." He went to the door before opening it and yelling out, "Wake up kid! You're going shopping."<br>"Edward, stop. You're going with me. If I take Riley then Tanya and Mike would have to come... it's too much." I headed into the bathroom and got ready. A few minutes later I called Mike upstairs.

"You want us to babysit?" He said before huffing.

"Please? They won't give you much trouble. They're pretty good kids." Tanya sauntered into the room holding my yogurt.

_What the hell doesn't she get about that being __**mine**_**?**

"What's up?" She asked when I raised an eyebrow at her.

"Why the do you continue to go through my shit?" I asked before snatching the yogurt from her, she just shrugged. "You and Mike are staying here while Edward and I Christmas shop-"

"Why are you going Christmas shopping?" Ellie's voice whispered from her doorway. "Santa bring everyone stuff." She wiped at her sleepy eyes and hugged my waist.

"Um…"

"Santa's not real kid." Tanya huffed.

Ellie didn't look fazed, "Oh yeah? Neither is your face." I snorted.

"Wow you're mature." Tanya cackled.

"I'm serious! The doctors can only help you so far before you look as plastic as my Barbie."

"You're annoying."

"Look at my face. Do I care?" Ellie lifted an eyebrow and Tanya glared.

"I would say you do care."

"You should see if you can Botox your eyes too. Obviously they're the ones that need to be fixed."

"I bet you don't even know what Botox is."

"Oh yeah, I have no clue what it is. I just like to toss it out there once in a while." I couldn't tell if she was joking or serious.

"You're obnoxious."

"You're a bad person."

"Says who?"

Ellie looked at me and then Mike, "Well I was the only one talking… So my best guess is… me."

"Why do you say that?"

"You just tried to crush a child's dreams that screams bad person!" Ellie screeched, Seth crawled out of his room and I furrowed my eyebrows.

_I really hope that kid doesn't know how to open his own crib now._  
>He came to my feet before grabbing onto my pant leg, and shakily hoisting himself onto his feet, before falling back down again.<p>

I squatted down next to him and pulled him into my lap, "Look at my big boy! Look at you." I coo'ed before peppering his face with kisses and pressing his small body into mine. It was the first time I had ever seen him make a move to stand up on his own.

"Mike tell her!" Tanya shouted before jabbing a finger at Ellie. I pulled Seth up so that he rested on my hip and looked down at Ellie.

"Santa will be bringing you presents this year." I didn't want to lie to her. "Don't worry about Tanya. She's perioding too." Mike side stepped away from Tanya and I rolled my eyes.

…TEC…

"We could get Seth a 'My Baby Can Read' set." Edward suggested as we sat down in the food court. I sat across from him.  
>"What he really needs are clothes."<br>"You're going to be 'that' Mom, huh?" I stopped and gave him a look. He laughed lightly and reached under the table, grabbing my chair and pulling it next him.  
>"You wanted him to read for Christmas." I deadpanned and he shrugged.<br>"What do you want for Christmas?" He pulled me into his side and took the previously purchased bags from my lap, allowing me to entwine my fingers with his.  
>"Nothing. What about you?"<br>"I just want you guys to be happy." I 'awe'd at him and kissed him deeply before a booming voice interrupted us.  
>"Mr. <em>Cullen<em>!" The voice slurred suggestively, Edward broke away from me before turning to two teenagers, standing on the other side of the table. The girl muttered, "Oh this is awkward..." and blushed deeply.  
>"Hey guys, what're you doing here?" Edward asked, the kids shrugged before the boy answered.<br>"We have family here. What about you?" He looked to me and wiggled his eyebrows, "Who's the flavor of the month?"

"My wife," I shot the kid the bitch brow, "Bella, this is Ben and Kate, they were my students in Forks." The big guy stuck out his hand.

"Nice to meet you, beautiful." He smiled adorably and I smiled and shook his hand.

"I didn't know you were married Cullen." Edward nodded and pulled me closer to his side.

Ben peered into the Toys R' Us bag on the small table in front of us, "A little old for Barbie's aren't we, Mr. Cullen?" He kinked an eyebrow and I grinned.

"We have kids."

Ben looked heartbroken, "Poor kids…" I nodded and Kate snickered.

"Don't you have somewhere to be?"

"Would it matter if we did?"

"Yes."

"Then no." My phone started ringing loudly and I jumped to answer it, seeing that it was Riley.

"Riley?" I asked before growing concerned when I heard Seth's cries in the background. "What's wrong?" I held up a finger and moved away from the table.

"Seth has been crying since you left. I don't know what to do…"

"Give him to Tanya." I said reluctantly, but she was a woman, and hopefully had some kind of experience with children.

_Yeah sexist I know._

I took a seat on the bench in the middle of the wide walkway. Some asshole ran right into my crossed legs, his shin harshly coming into contact with the gun on my ankle. The man fell from my feet and splayed out on the floor. I jumped up to stand over him and offered my hand.

"Oh shit! Are you okay?" The man nodded and brushed himself off as he stood, before a flash of recognition flitted across his face.

"Well if it isn't little Isabella Swan!" He roughly pulled me into a tight hug before releasing me just as quickly.

_Little my ass._

"I'm sorry… Do I know you?" He ran a hand through his short brown hair and smiled widely at me.

"Come on, there's no way you don't remember me! We used to be best friends, when we were kids-"

"Hold on." I whispered to him, before holding the phone back to my ear. "Riley, did you get a hold of Tanya?"

"She didn't know what to do." The man in front of me nodded at someone over my head and I turned slightly to see said person in my peripheral.

"Just my wife." The man assured, I nodded and attempted to listen to Alec but Seth's cries got increasingly louder.

I sighed, "We'll be home as soon as possible."

"Okay, thanks."

"Mhmm bye." I hung up and looked back at the man. "So who are you?"

"Quill! You seriously don't remember me?" I shook my head and patted his shoulder.

"Sorry." The man's eyes shifted to a person over my head and I frowned. The fucker was obviously trying to play some kind of angle. I just didn't know which it was exactly.

I turned looking for the person Quill was looking for, "I would love to meet your wife, Quill. Why don't you call her over?" I said, the man gave me a nervous look and I looked for Edward who was casting me a concerned glance over his former student's heads. I jerked my head to this guy and wobbled my hand back and forth, saying that this dude was kind of weird.

"_Do you need me?_" He mouthed.

"_I can handle it._"

"_Watch the violence. Public place._" He warned. The man in front of me whistled and another smaller man sauntered over. He was large and jolly looking.

"Wife?" I asked, Quill wrapped an arm around the other man and smiled tightly.

"Did I say wife? I meant significant other. I like to call him my wifey though… He's the girl in this." He smiled proudly, the smaller man curled a lip and I laughed. I didn't have much experience with homosexual men but I was almost positive they didn't go around boasting about the _female_ in the relationship.

"So Bella is that," He cleared his throat, "_fine_ _young stud_ your husband?" I looked to Edward and I kinked an eyebrow.

"No, he's my brother." I jerked a head at Edward and he came towards me. He went to wrap his arm around my waist and I side stepped him, choosing to loop my arm through his and make an effort to look a bit more platonic.

"Don't you remember my big brother?" The man's eyebrows furrowed as he took in Edward.

"Yeah, of course I do… remember you…" The man said before attempting to laugh lightly. "Hey… bud." Edward jerked his chin at the man. My phone buzzed in my pocket.

"Hello?"

"Mommy?"

"Yes?"

"I think that Tanya and Mitch are wrestling."

_Mitch?_

"What? Where's Riley?"

"He's right here."

"May I speak to him?"

"No."

"Ellie."

"He's bouncing Baby, he just stopped screaming. Riley? What's this?"

"_Put that down Ellie._" Riley sounded panicked. There was a loud bang and Seth screamed before his cries were muffled.

"Mommy... Come home. They're screaming now." Ellie sounded much less exuberant through the speaker.

_I swear if those asses are having sex…_

"We're coming." I hung up.

I felt Edwards eyes on me, "We need to get home. Moms been arrested for public indecency." Edward nodded and Quill grabbed my arm, Edward put his arm in front of me pushing me behind him slightly so that Quill no longer touched me.

"Watch your hands." He gritted through his teeth. Quill put his hands up in surrender.

He peeked around Edward, "Isabella, we should catch up." The older man stepped from under Quills arm, visibly grossed out.

"Mhmm. Well I'll catch you later." I said before turning and grabbing Edward's free hand.

"I mean, can't we follow you back to your home or something? We would invite you over, but we're from out of town and staying at the Marriot."

"No, you can't follow us home." Edward answered for me.

"I wasn't talking to you man. Isabella?"

"No seriously. What the hell is your issue, man?" Edward let go of my hand and stopped walking, spinning to face Quill instead. I grabbed his arm.

"Edward it's not worth it, Honey." I tugged lightly on his arm and Quill smirked at me.

"I wouldn't call my brother 'Honey' Isabella. Did you lie to me?" He smirked at me and a stirring feeling erupted in my gut.

"Who the fuck are you to question her?" Edward growled before stepping closer to the Quill. I placed my hand on Edwards back in an attempt to calm him.

"We need to go home." I whispered, I glared at 'Quill' and his partner before wrapping my hand around Edwards and pulling him towards the exit. We sped out of the mall parking lot and made the thirty minute drive home a ten minute one due to Edwards speeding. We sat in silence for the majority of the ride, with the exception of when I told Edward what I had heard on the phone. When we pulled up to the house a large black Mercedes SUV sat outside of our house, similar to the car that passed when we were shot at. I barely waited for the car to stop when I jumped out and darted for the door.

"Oh fuck." I whispered as I took in the torn up foyer, I took the steps and ran from room to room, not seeing evidence of anyone; I drew my gun from my ankle.

"Ellie? Baby, where are you?" I shouted, my heart thumped in my chest as I kicked her bedroom door open. I rushed toward her open closet where she and Seth sat in the corner. I gasped, "Oh dear god."

Arms wrapped around me from behind and I whipped around.

"Bella!" Carmen let go of me while I turned but threw them back around me and I quickly tucked my gun into my waist band. "Oh dear, I'm sorry about the kids. Eleazar and I came in and they were playing with a condom. I sent them to Ellie's room for a while, you know, so that we could figure out who the hell was in your house. I didn't know Ellie was giving makeovers." I pulled Seth from Ellie's arms and wiped the bright pink lipstick off of his face. Ellie stood and hugged my legs.

"You okay Mommy? You sounded scared." She said, her face was painted in different shades of pink. I wiped some blush off of her cheek before kissing it and pulling her closer towards me.

Carmen laid a hand on my shoulder, "Bella honey, calm down." I realized then that I was breathing heavily.

"Yeah… I'm fine." I said before peppering my kids with kisses.

"Mommy's a little clingy sometimes. You know, I think it comes from her spending so much time with Daddy. I get the same way." Ellie giggled and kissed my cheek.

"Bella?" Edward ran into the room, his pace slowing to a jog as he approached us. "What the fuck happened to the foyer?"

"I told you Mike and Tanya were wrestlin'." Ellie said before blinking innocently.

Carmen shook her head, "Apparently your babysitters got into a little tiff while you were away. They're all in the kitchen." She slapped Edwards shoulder, "What? No, 'hello Aunt Carm'? And you need to watch your language." Edward smiled and hugged her, his eyes met mine and they conveyed his fear. I nodded and while Carmen was facing away I gasped into Ellie's hair.

"Thank god you're okay." I pressed them closer to my chest. "You scared me."

"Why?" Ellie cupped my face, searching my eyes

"Well," Carmen turned with her hands on her hips to face the kids and me again. "Mommy and Daddy are obviously a bit shaken up, so let's go make cookies and leave them to themselves." She bent down and took Seth from me, I reluctantly let go of my babies and was wrapped in a hug by Edward. Carmen left the room swiftly and Edward pushed his nose into my neck.

"Baby." He inhaled shakily and I wrapped my fingers into his hair. I gently pulled his head away and fused my lips with his. "God I was so fucking scared. I saw the foyer and-"

"I know." I whispered against his skin. "Me too." His arms tightened around me and he breathed in the scent of my hair. "Fucking hell. I'm going to kick Newton and Tanya's asses."

I pulled away from him, just for him to pull me back to him. "No, just wait with me for a second, Baby." His bright green eyes glowed with worry and fright and I wrapped my arms around his neck and just waited.

"I was so fucking worried." He whispered, I could tell, he was shaking under my touch.

"Its okay, Baby." I soothed, I pulled away and grabbed his hand, taking him to Ellie's bed and sitting with him. He pulled my legs into his lap, before massaging my calves. I rested my head on his shoulder and rubbed his back in return.

"No. It's not. Maybe I bit off more than I could chew." I tilted my head so that our eyes met and he gulped. "None of this is worth it if we have to continuously look over our shoulders. I'm not going to risk my family's safety for Riley." I understood where he came from, Riley was a good kid and all, but family comes first.

"I agree. But isn't it too late? Obviously the people looking for Riley know that we're linked to him."

"Not necessarily. Only a few people know…"

"The person looking for him knows, or he wouldn't have sent that guy to trail us," He shifted me in his lap and buried a hand in my hair.

"That's true- What the fuck is this?" He started yanking at the hair on the nape of my neck.

"Baby... stop that hurts." He ignored my words and continued to yank at my hair. "What are you doing? Stop." His fingers twisted and he used his other hand to lift my hair away from my neck, I turned on his lap so that my back was facing his chest.

"I think there's a bug in your hair. Be still." All of the sudden there was a searing pain and I let out a wail before a small black wad of something connected to some of my hair was thrust in front of my face. I rubbed the edge of my hair and whimpered as Edward pushed me off of his lap and crushed the small device.

"Sorry, I wasn't trying to hurt you..." He pulled me into his chest, after sitting down, and kissed along the back of my neck. "Where did that come from?" He asked before his hands gently massaged my scalp.

"_Well if it isn't little Isabella Swan!"_

"Quill, he hugged me in the mall today. Fucking bastard." The tip of Edward's ears turned red and he growled lowly. I looked to the sticky black hair covered wad on the ground before scrunching up my face.

"We should probably get that to Rose." He turned to glare at the disgusting bug. I nodded and turned to wrap my arms around him when the door slammed open. My entire body froze before a voice rang out through the room.

"You lied to me." I faced an angry Ellie; she dropped our shopping bags at her feet. "Santa isn't real is he?"

"Yes he is," Edward said with a straight face.

"Ellie honey I told you to leave them alone."

"Wait Aunt Carm. This is adult business." She said softly, her gaze never breaking from us.

"Now Mommy I'm going to give you one more chance. Is. Santa. Real?" My eyes widened and I failed to suppress my laughter. _She looked so fucking adorable_. She approached me swiftly, grabbing my face in her hands.

"Have you gone mad, woman? This is serious." She didn't seem at all amused and I bit the inside of my cheek to hold in my chuckles. "Look at me mother. Is there, or is there not going to be a jolly old fat man coming down my chimney tomorrow?"

_Don't make a prostitute joke. Don't do it._

"Depends on how much he offers."

_And you failed._

…TEC...

I **hope you laughed and/or enjoyed.**

**So... I have about a fourth of a Christmas chapter written and if I get… 385 reviews I will write my ass off and post it tomorrow!**

**You know you want to review the longest chapter that I have written yet! **

**You do!**

**I agree.**

**Merry Christmas and Happy Chanukah and Kwanza!**

**(To all that have wished me a Merry Christmas in reviews and I didn't say anything about it, I apologize. Don't think of me as a dick please? I just like to say it closer to the Holidays tehe)**

**Just remember all I want for Christmas are your reviews :D**


	16. Chapter 15

**Thanks to: kamelia, TheAllbrighton, dowlingnana, .gotes, koleen05, MaryMary123, alc1002, kembie, dazzleglo, melissamary55, Melnaugh, Yummy dummy, rlwoods, luv2dance and DenisseSchmidt.**

**Thanks for all the Christmas wishes and wonderful reviews!**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

Edward nuzzled against my neck, burying his nose there. " I think the kids are sleeping." He whispered, rubbing his thumb along my exposed hipbone.

"Have you been up this whole time?" It was at least three in the morning, we had all turned in at around eleven and I promptly fell asleep.

I looked over to see his green eyes gleaming with happiness. "Baby, you should have gone sleep," He shrugged and I ran my thumb over the bags under his eyes.

"I couldn't."

"Why?"

"Too excited." He smiled goofily and I giggled softly, and leaned over and placed a sweet kiss on his lips. "Come on." He whispered before taking my hand and pulling me out of the room.

"Is she sleeping?" I whispered before rubbing my eyes, as Edward peeked into Ellie's room. He nodded excitedly before hurrying past me to the stairs.

"Come on, Baby!" He whispered loudly before grabbing my hand and pulling me down the steps.

"Slow down!" I whined drowsily as I stumbled my way down the steps, once we hit the landing he wrapped his arm around my waist.

"Baby, calm down, will you?" I mumbled as he wrapped his arm around my waist and half carried me to the closet where we had hidden the kid's toys. He dropped me at the door before going into the closet and pushed out the gifts. I stared sleepily at the brightly colored packages and leaned against the wall.

"Put them under the tree! Hurry before they wake up!"

"Honey, it's three in the morning. They aren't going to be up anytime soon. Ellie already knows Santa isn't real anyway…" I whispered hoarsely before bending to pick up the gifts and take them into our living room where our big ass trees sat. I shoved all the gifts under the tree and went back for more. After about three trips to the tree and back Edward and I sat in front of the tree, him almost vibrating with excitement and me almost asleep in his lap.

"I love Christmas." He sighed softly, running his hand through my hair. "Even this one."

_Yeah the whole being shot at kinda puts a damper on the spirit._

"Is that so?" I slurred, I laid a hand on his thigh to slow the bouncing, I was getting a major head ache. A door opened upstairs and Edward shot up, pulling me up with him.

"Go close the front door and say bye to Sauce." He whispered quickly.

"The doors open? I thought you closed it before we go to sleep." He smiled softly at me.

"No, Baby, go open and close it."

"Who's Sauce?"

"Who?"

"Sau-" Footsteps thundered into the bathroom. Edward pushed me to the front door.

"Go!" He squeaked before slapping my butt, I dragged my sleepy ass to the door before yanking it open and slamming it.

"Bye Sauce! Come again! You'll be missed!" I'm sure my words were intelligible but a door slammed again and I looked to the front door.

"I thought I closed that?" Next thing I knew Edwards arm was around my waist and he was pulling me to the steps.

"False alarm that was Riley, not Ellie. I said Santa, honey. Not Sauce." He whispered before taking me up stairs and depositing me in bed. I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.

_Not for long of course._

"Oh. My. Gosh." Came a muted voice, my eyes fluttered open slowly before closing again. I was shaken roughly four times before I shot up.

"It's Christmas!" Ellie shrieked as she straddled my waist and shook me again. "Get up! Look at the presents! Even Baby is excited!" She screamed in my face, I looked over to see Edward holding a crying Seth.

"No… don't look like that. He's excited." She attempted to convince nervously.

"What'd you do to him?"

"Mommy, those are tears of joy." She patted my face before jumping off of me and grabbing my hand, her enthusiasm almost topping Edwards as she tried to drag me from bed.

"What happened?" I asked pulling against Ellie while reaching out for Seth.

"Ellie dropped him on the way in here."

"Daddy! If you're going to tell it, tell it right. I let down the side of his crib and when I went to catch him, I missed. He'll be fine! Come on!"

"Ellie don't do that, he could have seriously been hurt." I frowned at her and shook my head. I ran my hand over my face before Edward handed Seth to me.

"Is she done being in trouble?" He asked with wide eyes, I shook my head in confusion before shrugging.

"I guess?" Edward pulled Ellie's small body into his arms and over his shoulder before rushing down stairs. By the time I was in the hallway they were both downstairs. Seth's cries quieted as we looked over the balcony at the tree.

"Tee!" He squeaked before slapping me repeatedly on the cheek, I grabbed his hand.

"No no. Hitting isn't nice, honey." He frowned at me and shook his head before bouncing in my arms.

"Tee!" He screamed again, I sighed and headed down the stairs, it must be some kind of Masen genetics because I was still tired as hell. I sat Seth next to the tree before going for the first present and putting on a bright smile.

"This one's for you pumpkin." I said before passing the large pink wrapped box to Ellie, who ripped into the package before gasping. I helped unwrap a gift for Seth before turning to Ellie to watch her flip the fuck out.

"You got me a Barbie limousine!" She squealed, before casting it aside and going in for the next one. Notice that she said _you._ After I broke the news to her that Santa wasn't real she gave me a speech about how lying wasn't good, especially when you do it compulsively. Carmen taught her that word. She ripped open the next gift and her eyes lit up, "Baby Alive?" She threw herself into my arms and essentially Edwards, because I sat between his legs.

"I'm not even mad about you ruining my childhood anymore!" She said easily before kissing both of our cheeks and going back to the tree. I heard gasps and looked up to see a blurred Carmen as she darted towards the steps. Not much later she was kneeling next to Edward and me, hugging us good morning before pulling out her camera out of seemingly nowhere.

_Did she just carry that around with her?_

"Oh I can't remember the last time I spent Christmas with little kids… It must have been Ellie's… third Christmas?" She looked at us and Edward nodded in confirmation.

"Yep, she was so little." Carmen sighed nostalgically and Eleazar appeared, but I swear they had left the room at the same time…

_It's that Masen spirit._

"Hey buddy," I said as Seth dragged a large stuffed toy towards me and settled in my lap, forgetting all of the other gifts under the tree. I pulled his small body to mine, letting him play in my lap before turning my attention to Ellie who had torn through all of her presents in record time. She pushed the torn wrapping paper out of the way before stacking up her gifts neatly.

"Thank you everybody! I love all my stuff." She sent us a brilliant smile and hugged Carmen and Eleazar before looking around.

"Where are Tasha and Mitch?"

We didn't even bother to correct her, didn't care enough. "They went home for the holidays, Honey."

"What about Riley?" It was my turn to look around, "Did he go home too?" I shook my head.

"He must still be in his room." I turned to Edward, "I'm going to go check on him." He nodded and helped me up, after taking Seth.

"Riley?" I knocked softly on his door, in case he was asleep. He sent a weak "Come in." and I pushed open his door. His room was pristine his bed being the only exception. He had tissue's surrounding his curled up body and I rushed towards him. I felt his forehead, my motherly instincts kicking in.

_I know… Who woulda thought?_

"Are you feeling alright, hun?" I moved my hand to his cheek and his hand shot up and he grabbed my wrist, pulling it away. His eyes were slightly puffy and he pulled himself into a sitting position, before swiping a hand over his nose and sniffling.

"I'm fine." He said softly.

He was lying. "Scoot over, Alec." I said stubbornly, his eyes shot to the door.

"Does your husband know you're up here?" I huffed and rolled my eyes.

"Yes. But if he didn't what's the big deal? He knows were just friends, he also knows that I'm not into the cradle robbing thing so…" Riley smiled a little, before his face dropped again.

"Well you know… He didn't like that we sat at a table and talked, I doubt he'd be too fond of us being in bed together." I nudged his shoulder before turning so that I was sitting next to him and leaning against the headboard.

"What's going on?"

"Nothing," I narrowed my eyes at him and he sighed. "It's stupid…"

"Alec."

"I miss my parents." He blurted out before hanging his head. I rubbed his back, and he wiped at his nose again.

"That's not stupid at all."

"Don't patronize me." He scoffed.

_God. You're a bitch for 99% of the time, but that one percent comes out and people get defensive._

_People these days._

"I wasn't patronizing you," I said honestly. "If I couldn't spend Christmas with at least one of my parents I'd be upset too." He nodded and put his head in his hands.

"I have never spent a Christmas without them… It's harder than I thought." His voice lowered to a whisper. "It didn't really hit me until now." His wrists turned lightly, wiping tears. "I just was caught off guard. I knew it was going to be hard but not like this, Bella." His head turned and blue eyes were red rimmed. It made me wonder if this was how Edward felt during Christmas, I instantly wanted to wrap my arms around my husband. Feeling twice as fucking bad, but Edward had been without his mother for at least five years when we had met.

_Gosh I'm a self-centered fuck._

"Aww… Don't cry, Hun." I wrapped an arm around his shoulder and patted his head. He turned so that his tears soaked the shoulder of my shirt. This doorbell rang and I felt like total shit for flaunting my parents in his face. We sat in silence for about ten minutes and I just let him mourn and weep and what not.

"I don't know if it would help... But it's better than spending all of Christmas alone… You should come and spend time with us, downstairs." He sighed heavily and removed his head from my shoulder.

"I guess." He pushed the covers off of his body and got out of the bed behind me. He opened his bedroom door for me and we headed downstairs together. When I greeted my parents and Rose and Emmett I got a couple of weird looks. We all kind of sat in silence too, which was a lot more awkward than being someone's Kleenex for thirty minutes. I tried to ignore all of the stares and grabbed for the television remote turning on the Disney parade.

"_Now for the moment you've all been waiting for…" _Mario Lopez trailed.

"Justin Bieber. Justin Bieber…" Ellie chanted.

"_Cee Lo Green!_"

Ellie's eyes widened and she threw herself back against the couch and screamed, "What the _hell_?" All eyes were on her as the rest of the family looked on in shock. Her own hands flew up and covered her mouth in shock. "Oh my… I'm so sorry." She proceeded to apologize to all of the shocked adults in the room and I felt bad for her.

"Ellie." Carmen gasped, being the first one to come to her wits.

"I'm sorry Aunt Carm. I didn't mean to! It was an accident. I don't even like Justin Bieber." I could tell that she was truly apologetic for what just happened because Ellie Masen, much like Bella Masen, doesn't apologize.

She looked to Edward whose wide eyes were on her, much like everyone else. "I'm sorry Daddy! I didn't mean it." I snorted and chuckled softly, and most eyes transferred to me.

"Ellie. You're lucky it's Christmas." I said before opening my arms to her, she climbed into me lap and continued to apologize as everyone came out of their Ellie induced shock. Conversation started to pick up after that but my family was still giving me weird looks. I finally got tired and stood up.

"Emmett." I barked, he looked up at me with that _damned look_. "Can I talk to you?" He stood and followed me to that fancy room that I didn't let anyone in. I didn't even know the fucking name of that room, but my parents had one growing up so…

"What's up with you people?"

"Is that a crack on my race?"

"Yes, Emmett. Because despite my being white, I'd just like for you to know that I'm cracking on _you_ for being white." He smirked, "Cracker."

"Too far, Bella. That one hurt." I pushed him gently, before laughing with him.

"No but seriously. What is it with you?" I plopped into the love seat and waited for an answer.

"Nothing really… We were just kind of shocked to see that while everyone else was out front doing Christmassy things you were up in Riley's room. And for a long time." He raised an eyebrow at me.

"It isn't what it looked like." He ignored me.

"I mean I would just like to assign one mission where you didn't sleep with _one_ of the guys associated. Jesus. Who even knows what you have after working all of those prostitution busts!" I scoffed.

"We weren't having _sex._" I hissed. He nodded towards my soaked shoulder. "No scratch all of that. We did have sex. And he came all over my shoulder. It was _th_uper kinky." I said sarcastically, Emmett covered his ears.

"And I only slept with one of the guys from an assignment! Then I married him. You people just never let shit go." Emmett wrapped an arm around my neck before pulling me down for a noogie. "Damnit let me go." I growled. He obliged and I stood before heading into the living room. Charlie, Phil, Renee and Rose still gave me weird looks when I curled up next to Edward.

Of course all of those looks were rectified when Emmett came in shortly after and loudly announced, "Bella and Riley _weren't_ having sex. False alarm." Half of the fucking room sighed in relief, shows how much they trust me.

Carmen lurched forward in her seat, "Well I would hope not!" Edward shook with laughter and I buried my face in his chest.

"If it helps I was like ninety four percent sure that you two weren't having sex." I mumbled in my ear, I met his eyes in horror and he laughed.

"I'm kidding." I relaxed a little bit, "It was more like ninety seven percent." I covered my face with my hands at his teasing. "Joking." He chuckled before pulling my legs into his lap and wrapping his arms around me. He put two fingers under my chin and tilted my head up, our eyes locked and I felt a stirring in my abdomen. A stirring too strong to be lust.

_God, I love this man._

I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his, "I love you."

"I love you too, Merry Christmas, Baby." He whispered back, his hand slipped down to cup my ass.

"Not again. Do you two have any boundaries?"

"Shut up, Rose." Edward said over my head, I snickered and lay against his shoulder again.

"You are in public." She sneered, Edward looked around the house.

"Is _that_ so?" Rose scowled.

"You know what I meant."

"Okay! Ellie, you wanna come to the kitchen with me so that we can start on dinner?" Ellie jumped up and ran after her grandmother. I peeked over my shoulder at Phil, who I had yet to acknowledge.

"Phil."

"Isabella."

_Acknowledged._

I twisted my finger around the strings of Edward's hoodie, "So… I was thinking…"

He probed at my scalp, "Are you okay? Didn't I tell you not to do that anymore? You hurt yourself so badly last time…" I smacked his hand away.

"Jackass. I want you to talk to Riley, you know about how you got through things like this without your mom after she passed and whatnot." He grimaced and I widened my eyes.

"Please?"

"I don't know Bella… You know I don't like talking about it." I rubbed his neck and laid a lingering kiss on his jaw.

"Agh fine." He mumbled. Emmett made a whip sound from the corner of the room and Rose smacked his head. "Now?" I shook my head.

"Not now, I'm too comfortable." He smirked and kissed my head. Renee and Ellie reentered the room.

"Now what do you think that means?"

"A pot watched never boils?" Ellie asked looking up curiously at her grandmother.

"Mhmm."

"I don't know."

"Just think."

"Is there a right answer?"

"No. Just tell me what you think." Renee coerced.

"Um… Does it mean that a bad person being watched won't do anything bad, while they're watched?"

"No."

"I thought you said there was no right answer."

"There isn't."

"But you just said I was wrong."

"No I didn't. It's just how you took it. If you take everything literally you'll just be a negative person."

"Not if you say nice things…"

"Ellie focus."

"Mom give the kid a break." Emmett said before patting Ellie's shoulder.

"Yeah. I didn't get two weeks off to have to solve riddles, Grama." Ellie said before pouting.

"Just answer it."

"I don't know!"

"Could it have something to do with patience?" Ellie thought for a minute.

"No." She said with conviction, ignoring all of the adults laughing around her.

"If you stay watching a pot, then it'll never grow and or boil. It's all about waiting, and _having patience_." She smiled gently at Ellie before looking to us. "Deep huh?"

_She looked so damned proud._

"I liked my version better." Ellie grumbled before sitting in Emmett's lap.

"Alright gift exchange time!" Edward and I decided that it would be better if we got the kids gift exchange out of the way before the house became too cluttered. We all passed around gifts and when it came time for Carmen to give Edward and I gifts she gave us two clothing boxes.

_Dear god._

We both pulled the thick red sweaters out of the boxes and I thought I was going to cry.

_I was actually going to have to wear that for the next few hours._

My sweater said _**Babymaker Major **_on the front; I thought I was going to have to take some Pepto Bismol when I saw the abomination and Edwards said _**Professional Inseminator**_**. **Of course everyone else loved the sweaters getting a nice chuckle out of it, except Charlie who looked mildly disturbed the entire time. I turned my sweater to the front to fold it when even _bolder_ fucking letters glared at me.

_**Ask us what we did on Thanksgiving.**_

The backs of our sweaters matched.

"Oh my god that's so funny." Rose gasped pointing at the shirt, apparently having only seen the back of the shirt. I took a deep breath through my nose about five times before looking into the crowd of laughing faces, and Charlie.

"What did you do on Thanksgiving?" Eleazar asked before snickering.

"Heh… heh." I muttered, lacking amusement. Okay, yeah, they got a few laughs at our expense but this was just shy of horrendous and definitely beat my most embarrassing moments.

Edward looked at his Aunt, His face was so fucking red I thought he had popped a blood vessel. "You weren't even here on Thanksgiving." I could tell he was on the line between thinking it was mildly funny and being pissed the fuck off.

_Likewise, Honey._

"Yeah I called around though. I was trying to give you something clever." She said before beaming at us. I bit my lip and put the offending garment back into the box.

"Oh no you don't honey! You put those sweaters on." I wondered if my happy family could see the pure anguish in my eyes. I exhaled a shaky breath and pulled the sweater over my head. Edward pushed the sweater out of my hands and back into the box.

"Aunt Carm I don't know if that's quite appropriate." He said quietly.

"Neither was Thanksgiving, dear." My mother piped up.

"To our defense; we didn't know that you all knew about that..."

"We _heard_ you. _Bella_." Rose smirked.

"Jealous?" I kinked an eyebrow and she glared.

_Got to love family time._

"Okay we apologize." Edward said, while tucking the shirt back into the box.

"We want to hear it from Bella." My own brother…

"Oh I have to be sorry for giving my husband a quick thanks? It was Thanksgiving." Charlie gagged and Emmett wrinkled his nose.

"No, you're saying sorry because they had to _hear_ your thanks." I glared at Phil.

Edward put a hand on my thigh, "Just say sorry."

"No." I scoffed. "I'll wear the fucking sweater, I won't apologize. No matter how _humiliating_. " I spat the word at Carmen, whose smile never faltered and whipped the shirt over my head.

"Well I'm not wearing this." Edward said before putting it back in the box.

"Do not worry. I'm here!" Alice announced, I had no fucking clue how her loud ass could sneak into my house and be as quiet as a mouse every time. "Merry Christmas, Bitches!"

"Put on the sweater Edward." Carmen ordered ignoring Alice.

"Make me."

"Don't be immature."

"You guys are the ones that are trying to embarrass the living fuck out of us. Bella, take off the sweater." He said without looking at me.

"Say it nicely. I'm not your bitch." He huffed before turning his big green eyes on me and pouting.

"Please, Baby?" I nodded and smiled at him.

"What's that?" Alice said before yanking the sweater from Edward's hands, she turned it back and forth. "Professional inseminator…"

"_Oh…_" She cast a glance around the room before her eyes widened; she dropped the insulting object and squeezed in between Rose and Edward.

"Merry Christmas, Bell." Jasper said before hugging me and slapping his hand into Edwards.

Carmen sighed heavily across the room, "Well if you don't appreciate my gift…"

Edward ran a hand through his hair, "Carm, this is just…" He widened his eyes at the sweater shortly.

"I thought you would have had a sense of humor about this." She scoffed; I stared at my sweater with a curled lip and shook my head.

"Well…" Alice trilled awkwardly. "Here you are." She handed out gifts and received ones from, the people that knew her. I opened a small box and pulled out the white coffee mug, before turning it over.

**It's Just a Bit of Thanksgiving Satisfaction!**

My jaw tensed and I looked at Edward's mug.

**I Know What I'm Thankful For ;)**

I pursed my lips and looked around Edward, at her.

"Oh do we not like the Thanksgiving sex gifts?" She asked bluntly.

"What's sex?" Ellie's bright green eyes bore into mine.

"Something you'll never have to know about." Edward said before running a hand through her hair.

"Aunt Alice? Did you get me anything?" Alice gave her a box like the rest of us; Ellie tore through the paper and pulled out a little pink cup with _Bella in training_ written on the front of it.

"That's cute." Rose said as Ellie showed us the cup.

"Not if you knew what I meant by _Bella _in training." She snickered, I slapped her arm.

"Bitch."

"That's what I meant! She gets it." She smiled before pointing at me, Ellie glared.

"Here Aunt Alice." Ellie passed Alice a shirt, Alice held it up and read the loopy scrawl on the front.

"_Twinsies_." She turned the shirt to show a picture of Miss Piggy with the word written across her t-shirt clad chest.

"I helped pick it out." I said with a smirk.

"Alright kids. Dinners ready!" Renee said before shooting out of her seat and pulling Phil along. The men each took a platter out to the dining room table leaving us ladies to set the table and what not.

I sat between Mom and Edward; I leaned over to whisper in her ear. "Mom did you leave Phil's bib in your car? This meal could get messy." Phil must have heard because he narrowed his eyes at me and she slapped my thigh.

"Isabella Masen." She growled.

As we all ate; different conversations went on around the long table. Rose decided that it would be fun for us to you our coffee mugs during dinner and I got quite a laugh out of the words on the mugs.

As I picked up my mug to drink some water I was pegged in the head, with a roll. My head whipped to Emmett who sent me a sinister grin and I loaded up my spoon with peas, before launching them at him.

_Of course Mom only caught my retaliation._

"Isabella! Act your age." I nodded and hung my head guiltily before a piece of potato from the green beans landed in my lap.

"Emmett." Charlie scolded before smacking the back of his head.

"Em! You stained my pajamas!" I groaned, feeling the juice seep through the thin material, I picked a piece of ham up off of Edwards plate -when he wasn't looking- and threw it at Emmett. The meat landed in the middle of Emmett's chest and he scowled, he dipped two fingers into the sweet potatoes and stood up, claiming he had to wash his hands, as he passed me his hands rose to the level of my neck, to rub the food on me. I dodged his fingers instead and he was so busy trying to look nonchalant by staring at the wall, that his thick as fingers slapped into Edwards jaw.

Edwards eyes closed and he growled deeply before looking at Emmett who had picked up his pace after the mishap he picked up the roll that hit me earlier and threw it at Emmett's retreating form, unfortunately he couldn't get enough air with the inconspicuous flick of his wrist and to flew down the table, landing in Jaspers corn making the side fly into his face and lap.

Jasper sent Edward a glare used the same method I had used earlier to fling a spoonful of potatos at Edward, they his Edwards shoulder and Renee's neck. She gasped dramatically.

"Ugh!" She launched one of Phil's rolls at Jasper and was _completely_ off, hitting Charlie in the nose. I cracked up realizing that Jasper and Charlie were on two different sides of the table.

"Nice aim." I snickered earning a slap in the face with a couple of green beans. This started an all-out food war, Ellie somehow lifted Seth from his high chair and crawled under the table with him.

Hours later Edward, Jasper, Emmett and I were all on our knees, cleaning up the mess that was started due to us. Renee stood over us, supervising and we bickered back and forth petulantly.

"It's your fault." I grumbled before hip checking Emmett, he hip checked me back, making me fly into Edward.

"Stop it." Renee ordered. "Bella, go help Jasper over there." She muttered, I frowned and crossed the room to where Jasper was scrubbing the bottoms of the walls.

"Make her make us stop…" Jasper whined.

"I can't."

"It's your house!"

"Still." I looked up to Renee who was dancing on her toes, a sure sign that she needed to use the bathroom. "Mom. Just go, we'll be fine in here." I lied, she took of quickly and not much later the bathroom door slammed shut. I turned on my hands and knees to peek at Edward from under the table, but my eyes landed on my sleeping children.

I crawled under the table and plucked Seth from Ellie's arms before calling Edward to get Ellie. She was way too heavy for me to lift on my own when she slept. Instead of lugging them upstairs we deposited them with a few of their family members in the front room, before Edward, Emmett, Jasper and I scurried into the basement.

Renee roared when she left the bathroom, we could hear her from downstairs, and of course Rose tipped her off as to where we were. The basement door was ripped open and I cowered behind Edward.

"_What_ do you all think you're doing?" She growled.

"We're on strike." I yelled.

"Having sex." Jasper squeaked, we all stared at him and he blushed. "I mean… _Edward and Bella_ are having sex, they can't contain themselves… But you already knew that."

"Shut up, Jasper!" I growled from behind Edward.

Renee's face reddened, "Is that so? Then why are you down here?" Jaspers mouth flapped open and closed for a minute.

"We like to watch?" He blurted out, I scowled and Edward chuckled but Emmett punched Jasper.

"You're just making it worse, ass!" Emmett cried.

Renee just shook her head and marched away.

Edward groaned, and turned to me with a frown. "It's never a true Masen holiday until someone thinks that we're having sex."

…TEC…

**I hope you laughed and/or enjoyed.**

**I hope your holiday was great!**

**I've been trying to convey more of a loving side with Edward and Bella… Is it working?**

**Alright. This chapter? Yeah, it was 5,000+ words… That alone makes you want to review huh? Thought so :D**

**If we get to 420 reviews I will crank out another chapter and post tomorrow! But review because they encourage me to write… And I haven't even begun to start next chapter…**

**(I know this is lengthy but you mighty just find this interesting!)**

**I read a story where the author mentioned the truths from what happened in the chapter and I thought that I would let you in on some of my truths:**

**The conversation between Ellie and Renee about the watched pot… That was almost verbatim of a conversation I had with my grandmother on Christmas day (I was the Ellie of course) I just kind of dumbed her parts down just a tad haha**

**The Justin Bieber thing was real as well. No matter how old I am or get I will **_**never**_** cuss in front of my parents haha but I lost my shit that day… It's actually pretty sad. It was just my dad and I in the room and after I went "What the **_**hell?**_**" He said, "Ah. True Bieber fever." Don't judge because I don't have Bieber fever! I just was so excited to hear him at that parade so my reaction was the mix of a small appreciation for Bieber and a dislike of Cee Lo Green. That was the most embarrassing moment of my life…**

**Also if you haven't heard his Christmas album… well I recommend it tehe**

**Check out my profile! I made a Photobucket and I currently only have three pictures up but check them out anyway? Also I'm looking for reader suggested character pictures! So if you all know of an actor that reminds you of one of my characters review with a name or tell me you've got a picture and I'll give you my email so you can send them to me! I'll post them in my Photobucket**

**Characters I already have:**

**Seth**

**Riley**

**Then there is a picture of Ellie's pole hugging from chapter 13 (1)! I forgot to tell you all that most of that scenario was real. My little sister is a piece of work haha**

**Review!**


	17. Chapter 16

**Thanks to: melissamary55, luv2dance, hannah, kembie, totes. Mah. Gotes, rlwoods, DenisseSchmidt, 1234, dazzleglo, koleen05, Kgunter34, dowlingnana, kelliekinz, Yummy Dummy, Melnaugh, Twifan1986, teddywashere, and jlo.**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies. **

…TEC…

"Maybe we could re-gift?" I shrugged as I held up the hideous sweater.

Edward chuckled and I sighed and dropped the sweater. He wrapped his arms around my waist and rested his chin on my shoulder. "I don't think anyone else would quite understand the Thanksgiving part. We should just burn them." I grinned and he nuzzled my neck.

"What would be even better is if they didn't assume we were sexual deviants." I sighed and he chuckled. The phone rang and I left Edwards embrace to yang the shrill device from its cradle.

"Hello?" Edward sat on the bed next to me and pulled me down between his legs.

"Well Merry Christmas, Isabella!" Jessie's happy voice rang out.

"Same to you." I smiled, Jessie had the uncanny ability to make me smile, no matter what was going on.

"Tell that boy I said Merry Christmas too." I looked over my shoulder and Edward nodded, he had heard Jessie.

"Merry Christmas, Jess!" The older man grumbled out a thanks and I chuckled.

"So how was your holiday?" I asked as Edward started to massage my lower back.

"Eh it was alright."

"You know you're always welcome to come over right?"

"Yes Ma'am." I smiled.

"Alright then."

"Well Isabella I'll let you get back to your boy."

"Bye Jessie." He hung up and I turned in Edwards arms resting my head on his shoulder.

He shifted slightly and reached into his nightstand, pulling out a small velvet box. "What's this?" I asked as he put the box into my hands.

"It's my Christmas present to you." I met his eyes again before gently pulling the box open.

"Oh my god…" Nestled into the black velvet was a heart encrusted with diamonds, I gently picked it up by the chain it was attached to and watch the light bounce off of it.

"I love it, Baby. Thank you." I kissed him softly. His hand came up and he felt around the heart before pressing gently on the side of it, make it swing open. Inside there was a small picture of the four of us, one that we took last year in Alice's back yard. My eyes teared up and I pressed my hand to my mouth. This was my favorite picture of us. My head rested on Edwards shoulder and he had is arm wrapped around my waist while Ellie sat in my lap and Seth in his. We were all smiling happily into the camera.

"Well I'm glad you like it." He chuckled in my ear; I nodded and smiled up at him.

"This is the best gift I've ever gotten, thank you, Honey." I turned so that my chest was against his and threw my arm around him. I kissed his neck once more, "I love you."

"Love you too, beautiful." He smiled into my neck and I tangled my hand in his hair. The phone rang again and he reached for it, tilting both of us slightly.

"Hello?" He rasped, I moved so that I straddled him. "What's up Em?" Emmett's voice rumbled through the speaker and I frowned when Edward did. "When will he be here?" He ran a hand through his hair and tugged on the ends before his hand went down and he grasped my waist. "Alright, see you tomorrow." He hung up and fell backwards onto the bed, with me still in his lap.

"Who do they have?" I moved off of his lap to lie next to him in bed.

"Robert." I furrowed my eyebrows and he sighed. "McCarty."

"Oh… And they're taking you in to interview him?"

"Yep."

"Does Emmett know about the whole possible father thing?"

"Yeah, it's not really a big deal though. I can't let my family shit get in the way of my job." I nodded and threw my arm over his torso.

"Do you want me to go? Hell I'll interrogate that asshole for you." He looked uneasy.

"I don't know, Bella." I picked up the phone and recalled Emmett. Edward just sighed and let me go on.

"I want to interrogate Robert with Edward."

"Bells? You sayin' that you want to rejoin?"

"I'm saying that I want to help."

"Dad! Bella's rejoining!" He sang, Charlie whooped in the background and I frowned.

"Emmett that's not what I said."

"Doesn't matter, Bell! Love you, Bye!" He giggled before clicking off the phone. I sighed and settled the phone back onto the cradle.

"So… Wanna give me my Christmas present?" He asked before rolling on top of me and spreading my legs.

"Of course." I moved from under him and leaned over and grabbed my own velvet box.

I bit my lip as he opened the box to find a new watch, and an expensive one at that.

He clenched his hands around the dial of the watch and his eyes lit up. "Thank you, Baby." He kissed me deeply and I smiled against his lips. "You wanna give me a little somethin' else?" He raised an eyebrow and slipped his hand into the back of my pants. I slapped at his hand.

"Maybe tomorrow, I'm tired." I turned in bed and slipped under the covers. He turned and climbed in next to me.

"I'll take you up on that."

…TEC…

_Oh my god._

I awoke with a loud gasping cry as I felt my hips being pinned down. Edwards hand slid down my thigh and cupped my ass, before trailing back down my legs and draped my legs over his shoulder.

"Fuck Baby." I moaned as I writhed against his face

Fuck me if this wasn't a great way to wake up.

"Mhmm…" He groaned into my wet folds before sucking gently on both of them. I don't think I had ever been this fucking wet in my life, I sat up and looked at the sexy ass image of Edwards head buried between my legs, my juices dripping down his chin and on the sides of his cheeks. He laid kisses up my drenched slit before languidly running his tongue over my clit, and pressing down roughly. He thrust that long thick tongue into my pussy abruptly and I flipped the fuck out and grabbed his head before riding the fuck out of his face. I felt him smile against me but honestly didn't give a shit. He tongue fucked the hell out of my cunt, and I loved every second.

I felt my stomach tighten quickly and just when he pushed his finger into me and drew my clit into his mouth.

"Oh god."

Then my phone went off. _"Hey it's your Mom. Pick up the phone pick up the phone. Hey it's your Mom pick up the ph-"_ I slammed my hand onto the dresser attempting to silence it. His lips started moving on my cunt.

"Baby, you answered it." He said before sitting up, the light catching my arousal on his chin.

"No. Get back down there." I said before, and I don't even know when the fuck I got so flexible, my ankles wrapped around his neck and pulled him down. "Work me, Baby." I moaned, his hand went down and he massaged the bulge in his pants. He set back to work on my pussy.

"Hey, Mom." I attempted to sound normal but it came out as a whisper while Edward reached up and grabbed my breasts as he ate me like there was no tomorrow.

"Hi, Honey! How are you?" She asked cheerily, obviously not knowing what all the ruckus was about when the phone was first answered.

"I'm fi-" Edward nibbled on my clit and my body jolted roughly against his mouth making him moan, "I'm fucking amazing." I sighed.

"Watch your language!" She scolded.

"Mom why are you calling me so early in the morning?"

"Just wanted to say hi."

"I have to go now, Mom. I promise to call you la-later." I cried as two of Edwards fingers slipped into me, followed soon after by a third.

"Oh but I've got you now."

"I'm busy." I whined, bucking against him once more.

"Doing what?"

Edwards tongue flicked rapidly against my clit and I tapped at the phone, and when I was sure I hung up I cried, "EDWARD! Fuck!" and a variety of explicatives, My hips thrusted and jerked against him as he slurped up everything I gave him, before his tongue slipped into my spent pussy and did an extra sweep.

"I see that you're doing Edward…" My mother's voice filtered through, quiet loudly. I swear she sounded like she was standing next to the bed. I screamed and accidentally brought my heel down onto Edwards back, pretty roughly.

"Sorry, Baby!" I cried as he rolled over onto his back in pain.

"You could have at least tried to hang up or move the phone away, Bella." She complained, I went down to straddle Edward and kiss him, despite the fact that his face was covered in my cum, I used the bottom of my shirt to wipe his chin.

"Sorry Mom, I accidentally hit the speaker button instead of the end call button." I explained

"Jesus, you couldn't wait until I was gone to do that." Edward complained, I couldn't help but smile a little bit and kiss from his ear to neck. I heard the telltale sign of a button being pushed before my phone made the _**call lost**_ sound.

"How can I make it up to you, handsome?"

"Ride me?" My thighs quivered as his eyes darkened, I pulled down the waistband of his pants and slid onto my Baby. We both moaned as I enveloped him. I immediately started tightening and squeezing him as I bounced up and down on his cock.

"Fuck, Baby!" Edward groaned, I pulled off my shirt and pressed my naked chest against Edwards, He reached down and rubbed sloppily at my clit and yet still managing to draw out my orgasm. I slapped his hand away no matter how fucking good that felt, I leaned forward on him, sliding up and down his body, as opposed to just bouncing on him. He was so fucking deep.

"_Oh shit_?" My groan was so breathy and whiney sounding that it came out sounding like a question. My cheeks heated up at the strange sounds and Edward kinked an eyebrow in interest and I buried my face in his neck in embarrassment, letting him continue to thrust into me .

"That was pretty sexy, Baby." His chest vibrated as he chuckled and then slapped my ass. "Sounded like a porn star."

"Oh yeah. Super sexy." I said sarcastically. I shook my head. Then he hit that spot, the one that makes me lose my shit.

"_God yes_?" I cried into his neck doing the breathy moan and question thing. It was weird, I didn't like that new development at all.

"Fuck yes, Baby. That's your spot isn't it?" He smiled and thrust against my G-spot again, this wasn't the first time he had hit it and I have no fucking clue what was wrong with me.

I covered my mouth, "_Edward_?" He looked down to me his eyes wide. "Stop, this is embarrassing." I attempted to move off of him and he stopped my hips

"Why would you cover that up? Baby I'm gonna' make you scream my name." He said, before flipping me and driving his hard as steel cock into me. His words alone sent me into a frenzy, I fucking went into spazz mode with this man, I swear. He hit my good spot multiple times while I struggled to keep my mouth covered, and muffle the sound. I really did sound like an amateur porn star.

"Baby! I like hearing you. Just say my name?" He begged, he held out his hands and I took them wrapping my fingers around his own, he leaned down and kissed me softly. "Baby?" He whispered, holding my hands to his chest.

"Huh?" He moved slowly inside of me. He pulled my arms up and pressed them to the bed above my head.

"I got you." He smirked and dove in again, immediately hitting that fucking spot. I couldn't help it; I wrapped my legs around his waist and met him thrust for thrust. I yanked my hands that were pinned above my head so that I could cover my mouth.

He rammed against that Tiny spot mercilessly, "_Edward? Oh FUCK_?" I fucking winced at those damn noises but they sent Edward's pervy ass, over the edge. His pace slowing as he spilled his seed into me. Of course I had already come around four times since I was woken up.

"God that's the best sound I've heard in my life." He sighed happily before kissing me once, while I was still pinned, and then let me go.

"Gah I sound like a cheap porn imitation." I whined. I moved to sit up, after he rolled off of me and immediately fell right back against the mattress. "I think you broke my G-spot."

"Want me to massage it?" He asked haughtily before slipping his fingers into me again.

"No… Come up here." He laid next to me and I rested my head on his chest. "You're lucky you're a fucking sex genius, or I would have socked the shit out of you for holding me down."

"Well you know…" he smirked smugly. I didn't even have it in me to knock him down a few steps.

_It was that fucking good._

"Oh a merry Christmas indeed." He sighed.

…JCE…

"Do you think he'll remember me?" Edward asked as he fiddled with his cufflinks. I approached him from behind and brushed off his shoulders.

"Have you ever met him?"

"He left when I was two." He sighed; I wrapped my arms around his waist and rested my head on his shoulder blades.

"I think everything will be fine. I'm sure you could get a paternity test. I guess it wouldn't make much of a difference you know thirty years later." I ran my hand over his toned stomach. "Don't worry too much; I'll be with you the entire time." Hell but I was nervous. I know its selfish but if this guy _was_ Edwards father then I would be meeting his parent for the first time. I sighed and squeezed him once more before letting go. After going through our usual morning routines Edward and I were seen off by Alice, wearing her twinsies shirt and Ellie who was bundled up in Edward's professional inseminator sweater.

_Disturbing._

Edward's slightly shaky hand held mine on the entire ride to the station, "Distract me."

I shrugged, "You know, I never once got to sleep with one of my brothers friends." He gave me a look out of the corner of his eye and curled a lip.

"So?"

"I don't know. I feel like that would have been interesting." He nodded and rolled his eyes. "I mean, I read about that kind of stuff, I wish I had that kind of drama. That would have made my teen years so much better. You know high school isn't all parties and shit. I actually had work to do! The media is a fucking lie. I would read shit about teens partying their asses off and I would be like, 'Wow wish I was in high school…' But I was in high school. Reading. Fucking Friday nights." His hand went to my thigh and I looked up to realize that he was laughing at me. We still had about three minutes to go until we arrived though so I kept going. "And then my best friend was Alice! Imagine how fucked up that was as a teenager. When the other kids were having topless sleepovers Alice and I got together and listened to Emmett's fucking conversations through my closet. God we're lame. I mean who does that. I think she got off on that stuff though. Then there was the time when she insisted that she was a dendrophiliac. That kid was fucked from the beginning." I sighed and shook my head as I thought about my teen years.

"What's a dendrophiliac?"

"A person turned on by trees." I rolled my eyes and he pulled the car to a stop before hunching over the wheel in laughter. I smiled at him and stepped out of the car. He met me at the bumper and we clasped hands before walking in. Emmett met us at the door, handing both of us the same file, giving us a bit of background and an ear piece, in case in the viewing room they needed some extra questions answered that we forget to ask.

Edward read over the small stack of papers quickly, his eyebrows knit together. I rubbed his bicep gently and took his arm as we headed to the interrogation room. I peaked through the small window in the door, staring at the hunched yet nicely dressed form sitting alone. Emmett entered the room next to the one that we'd be in, and unlocked the door. The door buzzed and Edward pulled it open for me.

The man twisted in his seat slightly when we entered. "Hello, Mr. McCarty." I greeted stoically before taking a seat on the other side of the table in front of him. Edward scooted a chair next to me before plopping into it with a sigh.

"I'm Agent Masen and… so is he." I said awkwardly with a jerk of my thumb at Edward. The man nodded but kept his gaze focused on the table.

"So what is it that you do for work, Mr. McCarty?" Edward asked as he leaned back in his chair, looking at the file that rested on his knee.

The man shook his head. "I'm almost positive that you all know what I do."

_Eh, Standard questioning, dick._

"Let's pretend that we don't though. Answer the question." Edward's eyes seemed to bore holes in the top of the man's head. I thought that heads of companies were supposed to exude confidence. This guy hadn't met our eyes yet.

He sighed heavily, "Currently, I am the CEO of Volturi Inc." I nodded in thought and Edward continued.

"Now, Mr. McCarty, would you have any reason to murder Mr. Leo Volturi? You know, besides the fact that he owned this billion dollar corporation?"

"I didn't kill Leo."

Edward chuckled darkly, "That isn't what I asked you." Robert's eyes slowly traveled up the span of the table until they landed on Edward, harshly. My breath hitched as I finally saw the man's entire face. He could have been Edward's twin, which was weird seeing as Edward looked so much like his mother. He had the same jaw as Edward and the same eye shape even though Robert's eyes were blue. Even the nose was the same, weird shit.

Robert's eyes widened slightly when he took in Edward, but I guess he just assumed that the similarity was just an uncanny coincidence. You know, he left a kid thirty years ago. Edward is thirty two.

_Just a simple mind fuck._

My gaze snapped to Edward who sat staring at Robert with a cold look. He scoffed and raised an eyebrow. "Would you have any other reason?" He gritted.

"Look kid, Leo was my best friend." He said in reference to the late Leo Volturi. "I wouldn't lay a hand on him."

"Unless it came to money. Am I right?" I said leaning forward in my seat. Edward nodded, and Robert's jaw clenched.

"I didn't kill Leo. So why would I give you a reason for wanting to kill him. And why the hell would I kill him _now_? I've worked under Leo for thirty years. I have _no _reason to want the company _now_."

"People get fed up with bullshit, Robert." I sighed, "Everyone has their breaking point. Even if it is thirty years into the business. The more years you put in the bigger the business and the money gets. Am I right?" Edward nodded at me and I sat back in my chair.

"No. You aren't." The man said boldly. "Would you kill your best friend?"

"Depends on the circumstance." I said honestly. I looked over at Edward in amazement, he had kept his cool throughout this entire fiasco.

"I take it that you're joking."

"You saw right through me." I deadpanned. "Do you know anyone who would try to kill your_ best friend?_"

"Young lady I don't appreciate the way you're speaking to me."

"Frankly I don't give a fuck, _sir._"

"This is blasphemy. There is no reason for me to be treated this way." Robert looked back and forth between the two of us and Edward sighed. "The law says that I'm innocent until proven guilty."

"The law also says that murder is illegal_. Looky there_." I growled, Edward put a discreet hand on my knee.

"_Lay off, Bella."_ Emmett's voice said softly through the ear piece, Edwards eyes met mine, he had heard as well, and he nodded in agreement.

"Mr. McCarty." I gritted, "Is there any one that you suspect could have killed Mr. Volturi?"

"There are many that would want to take out a billionaire." He said snootily before sticking his nose in the air.

_Too good to kill but not too good to abandon your family huh?_

"Who better to take out the big boss then next in line. Is that what you're saying?" I leaned forward and Edward scribbled some shit on a pad of paper.

"Well his son is technically next in line." I shook my head, Alec wouldn't, especially after how torn up he was about Christmas. He continued, "So what? You can question his best friend like a criminal but when it comes to his son the boy is out of the question?"

"You know he's right, Bella." I narrowed my eyes at Edward only to see that he had his own glare turned on Robert. "People do fucked up things to the ones they are supposed to love the most." Robert's eyes widened at Edwards angry gaze.

_So much drama._

_Maybe I didn't need to sleep with my brothers friends after all…_

…TEC…

**Hope you enjoyed!**

**I updated my Photobucket there is every one that was at the Christmas dinner and pictures from Edward and Bella's house. **_**AND **_**the Christmas gifts from last chapter are posted as well.**

**So… The reviews are dwindling :( Cheer me back up?**

**Thanks :D They really do encourage my writing**

**Let's try… 435 for an update tomorrow.**

**Review!  
>IMPORTANT: THERE IS A NEW POLE ON MY BIO. IT'S ACTUALLY UP THERE THIS TIME AND IT'S A PRETTY BIG DEAL SO CHECK THAT OUT TOO!<strong>

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	18. Chapter 17

**Thanks to: Kayla, k, Anon, koleen05, totes. Mah. Gotes, Applelover21, Music ADD, rlwoods, dowlingnana, melissamary55, dr. meow1234, Ilovecherrypie, Yummy dummy, DenisseSchmidt, heartbrokentears, dazzleglo, Melnaugh, alc1002, Twifan1986, Kgunter34, luv2dance, kembie, and molliegoodgolly!**

**Thanks for all of the reviews! They really made me feel better about the story… I was thinking that a lot of people had flounced D:**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…**TEC…**

**EPOV**

He could just sit across from me, look me in the face and not recognize me. I realize that I was two when he left but this was the same fucking face that he sees in the mirror every day. He looks enough like me that- well- hell we _are _related.

I looked to Bella with my eyebrows knitted as she grilled Robert. "Oh okay. I _completely_ understand what you're saying." Mr. McCarty nodded smugly. She pulled the pad from my hands and read over it before staring at him with her jaw clenched.

_She was beautiful._

Even though she looked like she was going to flip over the table break off the legs and smash them into his crotch.

Repeatedly.

"So you are telling _me_ that there is absolutely no one that could possibly want to kill Mr. Volturi?"

"Now wait a second-"

She made a buzzing noise. "Wrong answer. You know why? Because he's _dead_. So _obviously_ someone wanted him dead! Right?"

"You aren't supposed to speak ill of the dead."

"I don't recall speaking ill of him. I was calling _you_ out on _your_ stupidity. Why don't you just give us a fucking answer?" I squeezed Bella's knee.

"You can't assume that I know something and get mad when I don't." Robert Puffed angrily.

"We don't assume things, Mr. McCarty." I spoke up before smirking at Bella. "We're cops."

"Who are notorious _for_?" He lifted an eyebrow.

"For putting asses like you away for murder?" He turned to me and smirked slightly. He had been doing that fucking smirking thing since we sat down. I didn't know what his fucking issue was, and it was always directed towards me. Never Bella.

_Even though she was the one bitching him out._

Bella lifted an eyebrow at me and I shook on the inside, worrying that she heard me. I smiled bashfully and she mouthed 'What?' to me.

"I would appreciate it if you two would stop making googly eyes and get back to business. I have a family to return to." My head snapped in his direction and my jaw clenched as he smirked in my direction. I shot out of my seat and slammed my palms against the table.

"Do you have some kind of fucking problem with me, McCarty?" The man's smirk fell and Bella's head snapped towards the double mirror as Emmett spoke softly in our ears. "Then why don't you shut up and let us continue. Because last I heard we were running this not you."

"_Masen, Do you need to leave?_" I turned to the mirror and shook my head before sitting down.

"Calm down, son." My nostrils flared and he smirked again when Bella laid a hand on my arm.

"You would make it a _hell_ of a lot easier on the both of us if you would just fucking answer what we ask. You are aware that we can question you for however long that you want and then we can hold you here, until the two of us-" I pointed to Bella and then myself. "decide that we're ready to do this again."

"Are you threatening me?"

"Depends on how you take it." I smirked grimly.

Bella smiled widely at me. "A literal will always see things negatively."

"Are you a literal Mr. McCarty?" I cocked my head to the side and he glared.

"_Unless you are actually taking this somewhere… which I doubt… Shut the hell up and get back on track._" I turned my head to the double sided mirror and raised an eyebrow before seeing Bella subtly rub her cheek with her middle finger. I turned back to Robert and leaned back easily in my chair.

"You can start talking, Mr. McCarty."

"What does this have to do with being a literal?" He blanched and I smirked before settling my hands over my stomach.

"Nothing at all." Bella answered smoothly. We all sat in silence for about three minutes with Emmett growling angrily in our ears. He threatened to come in to the room and shut this all down before I started talking again.

"I know that you know of someone that had it out for Mr. Volturi. The more information you with hold, the longer you're kept and once we find this guy the more charges you have against you." He rolled his eyes.

_Cocky fuck._

"How about this? The less I say the less you have against me."

"How about this? We have another component to the case who says that you are directly related to the murder of Mr. Volturi." I lied easily. Robert tensed in his chair and nervously pulled at his ear lobe.

So _fuck… you._

"There is always someone wanting to murder someone else." Robert wrung his hands under the table.

"Oh I know."

"Leo is dead. I can't bring him back and neither can you so why are we still talking about this?" He said suspiciously.

"Here's the thing. Leo has an heir. Alec. Then there's you. The more you help the longer you live. Capiche?"

"No. I don't follow."

"Gee for a murderer you sure are dense."

"I'm not a murderer." He said fiercely, his resolve crumbling quickly under his façade.

"You do realize that if it _wasn't _you that killed Leo, someone is after the business. If they get past Alec then your next."

He visibly shook, "I can't help you."

"Robby. We know there's someone that wouldn't blink twice at the chance to own a company. This is the same person who will be locked up for not only murder but attempted murder as well. Is that person you or someone else?" Bella leaned forward.

"What if I told you I knew of someone? And if I told you… I could be in really big trouble."

"You're in trouble either way, McCarty." Bella smiled sweetly. "There is _always _witness protection." She shrugged and he immediately started over flowing with information.

"What about my family?"

"They go with you."

"If you were in my position, what would you do? About your family? I just want them to be safe. I won't fuck with their safety, even if it means I'm locked up for a while."

_Fiercely loyal this time around huh?_

"If it were me. I would talk and pack up." I said before looking to Bella who nodded in agreement.

"You are sure that they'll be okay?"

She shook my head, "There is no telling but we will try our best."

"There is a man back in Chicago. We worked with him briefly and he was always a little bit harsh, he and Leo never got along. The rivalry got really big when they lost some of their biggest clients to Volturi Inc. They were a company that isn't afraid of underhand dealings." He thumbed sweat off of his eyebrow.

"What is this company called, Robert?" Bella asked before jotting more down on the legal pad she held.

"You should speak to your elders like that dear."

I rolled my eyes and my jaw ticked. "Answer her fucking question."

"Patino Inc." He said with a smirk.

"Why the fuck are you smiling at me? What _the fuck_ is so funny you fucking bastard?"

"Woah you kiss your wife with that mouth?" He smirked again.

"As a matter of fact I do. Answer my question."

"You just look familiar."

"No shit, Sherlock." Bella grumbled and I choose to ignore the comment.

"Young woman, do you have an issue with me?"

"Yes." She said straightening in her seat.

"And what would that be?" He asked before shifting in his seat as well.

"_We aren't here to play Dr. Phil, guys."_

"No but we are here to get answers, _Emmett_." Bella sneered at the window and Robert gave her a shocked look. I shook my head at her and she huffed in return. "I need a fucking break, Em."

"You're name isn't Emmett...?" Robert said before pointing at me, I shook my head and rolled my eyes as the large metal door unlocked and Bella grabbed my hand, tugging me to a standing position. She tugged me out of the room as soon as Emmett showed up to keep McCarty a bit of company. She pulled me into the family bathroom and I furrowed my eyebrows, I never saw the need for one of those in a police station but…

_Hey… if a family of crooks needed to take a leak we wouldn't want to be unprepared._

I pulled the door closed behind me and she paced the floor before looking up and meeting my eyes.

"You know what? Fuck him. Fuck him and his new family." She wrapped her arms around my waist and hugged herself tightly to my chest. My eyes widened as I hugged her back, I hadn't expected such a passionate reaction from her but it _is_ Bella so being around her was always a gamble in terms of her emotions. Her tears soaked the middle of my shirt- thank god for black- and I buried my face in her hair.

"Come on, Baby." I said softly. "Don't go soft on me." She smiled against my shirt before looking up at me.

"I almost knocked all of his fucking teeth out when he called you _son_." She spat the word and pulled away before going back to pacing. "Then he had the nerve to walk up in there looking just fucking like you and say you looked familiar? Fuck you and your fucking family jackass!" She waived a fist at the door adorably. "You know what? Forget him!" She put her hands on my shoulders and kissed me deeply. "I love you. Ellie loves you and Seth loves you that's all that matters right?"

"Right, I love you too, Honey. But you have to _calm down._" She ran a hand though her hair and yanked my face to hers kissing me roughly again.

"I'm so fucking mad right now."

"I see. Hence the _calm down._" She grabbed my shirt and pushed me towards the sink so that I leant against it. The she jumped on me, resting her knees on the sink and her arms around my neck. She slid down my body and settled over my dick before twirling her hips.

"No. Bella stop." I pushed her hips away and gave her an incredulous look.

"Fucking hell. I don't know what to do with myself." She ran a hand through her hair again. "I hang out with a one year old all day. This is just a big ass mind fuck to me. All the old people and the killing and what not." She fisted her hands in her hair and I smiled.

"You're doing great okay?" I cupped her face and made her look at me. "Keep calm for a while and then once we get what we need, you can stab his hand… key his car… anything, okay? I'll even help you." I pecked her lips.

She smiled in my palms, "You're so good to me." She laughed softly as did I and she covered my hands with her own. She grabbed my chin and pulled my mouth down to hers again, "I love you… You're so strong." She whispered and then she ran her hands over my biceps so I wasn't sure if she was talking to me about emotional strength or physical but I shrugged and kissed her chastely on the mouth.

"I love you too. And don't let the fact that you spend your days with a baby and a dendrophiliac make you doubt your skills." I smiled widely.

"I couldn't invite her to my house around the Christmas season…" She murmured sadly as the door behind us was banged roughly on.

"You two better not be having sex!" Charlie thundered, Bella blushed.

I pulled open the door and Charlie's eyes were closed and covered with a hand.

"Yes, Dad. Because we would do the nasty in a public bathroom and then open the door butt-ass naked." Bella snorted before pushing past him, he gave me a warning look.

"She's so eloquent. Wouldn't you say?" I smiled and he growled at me to get into the interrogation room. The metal door locked as soon as I approached it, but Bella was in there, I went to the viewing room and what I heard when I entered made me freeze.

"I suppose I have a lot of Birthdays to catch up on gift wise." Mr. McCarty's voice rang out and it was silent, in both the viewing and interrogation room_s._ I froze as I stepped farther into the room and took in Bella and Robert sitting across from each other. Bella gave him a blank look and he sighed. Emmett's hand came down on my shoulder, and I realized that the rest of the team was gone.

"She asked me to lock you out for a while, so that she could get something out of, McCarty. Have a seat." I huffed and fell into the nearest chair. Bella and Robert were still silent. She was always trying to fix shit. I just wanted to ignore this for a while… I didn't want to bring any Baby daddy drama into the already fucked up situations.

_Is that so bad?_

"I'm not following." Bella lied, quite obviously.

"I know who he is. You're partner."

"You don't know a thing about him." She growled protectively.

"I know that he's my son. Isn't that all that matters." Bella's breath hitched as did mine.

"There is no way you _both_ missed that." Emmett spoke up, "He damn near looks like your twin who just happened to come out twenty years prior." I shook my head.

"We weren't sure he knew." I sighed and he nodded.

"Then what the fuck is your issue?" Bella asked irately.

Robert leaned in a little too close to Bella, even though they were across the table, and I restrained myself from jumping through the fucking mirror. "I choose not to be a part of his life thirty years ago. Did you expect me to open my arms and have him call me Daddy?" I clenched my jaw.

"First of all back the fuck up because I will tear your shit up." He sat back and I smiled. "And no. I wasn't expecting a fucking movie reunion, but you don't have to be an ass to him." Robert rolled his eyes.

"Why are you so concerned about him?"

"Aren't you supposed to be concerned for your spouse?" She pulled her gaze up from her hands to glare at him. "Oops, forgot who I was talking to for a second. We obviously we believe in two totally different concepts of family."

"I have my own fucking family you know." He bared his teeth and she rolled her eyes.

"Yes, two of them in fact!"

"You don't know what you're talking about, Agent Masen."

"Well I was twenty and scared shitless, alright? I had big things planned and I wasn't going to let him, or his mother get in the way of them."

"You selfish bastard." He smirked and shook his head.

"Regardless of the past I'm glad he's okay. How is his mother?"

"She passed." The prick didn't look the least apologetic. I ran a hand through my hair, tugging roughly on the ends.

"So about these birthday presents…"

"We don't want anything from you."

He pulled out his wallet and both Bella and I grimaced, "You two have kids?"

She nodded, "Two." I didn't like how personal and easy going this conversation was getting.

"Names?"

"Doesn't matter. What the fuck are you going to do with their names? Think about them for thirty more years?"

"You aren't afraid of going for the low blows are you? I just want to know my grandkids names." Bella started laughing.

"They aren't your grandkids, you incompetent dick. You _are_ funny though." She wiped at her eyes and he groaned. I stood and pressed the button to unlock the metal door that sat in front of the double sided mirror. I quickly entered the interrogation room and sat down. Bella and Robert remained in a staring contest. I stopped it by pulling Bella's chair closer to mine and wrapping an arm around her.

"Tell us more about this Patino Inc." I grumbled, choosing to diverge from the topic.

"See." Robert looked at Bella and gestured towards me. "He can take this whole father thing like a man. So why do you continue to bitch?" My jaw tensed.

"Watch the way you talk to my wife, Jackass. I'm not addressing the _father thing_ because I would like to ignore the fact that I am related to the biggest prick to walk the earth." I turned to Bella. "It's sickening when you think about it." She comically shivered and we both turned to McCarty.

"So tell us more about this Patino Inc." Robert looked disgruntled but he rattled off his information about Chicago.

"_Looks like we're going to Chicago, Boys._" Emmett murmured in the mic, there was a squeal of protest from Tanya that was heard through the double sided mirror and Bella glared at Em through the thin glass. "_And Tanya and Bella._"

…TEC…

**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**

**If you haven't voted or reviewed about Bella's possible pregnancy do it NOW! The review taking and voting will be closed two chapters from now so if we don't reach our review goals… Next Wednesday? (BTW everything is leaning towards her becoming preggo again…)**

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	19. Chapter 18

**Thanks to:****1234, K, Melnaugh, DenisseSchmidt, totes. Mah. Gotes, jkkhreedy, MaryMary123, dowlingnana, Cockerspanmom, Yummy Dummy, luv2dance, alc1002, Kgunter34, melissamary55, muzaklover, Clickchick18, kembie, and kelliekinz.**

**Thanks for all of the reviews they really do mean a lot to me! Keep them coming!**

**So… Klutz is back! Yaaiiiyyy!**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

BPOV

"Chicago…" Edward said quietly, I nodded. "What are we going to do about the kids?"

"I guess I could stay behind with them." It wasn't really that big of a deal, I wasn't technically an agent anyway. Edward shot me side glances as we drove home. "I don't want them in the mix down there, and Ellie has school. It's too much." He nodded and I sighed and let my head drop against the headrest.

Edward sighed heavily, "Maybe I should stay behind too. Let Tanya and Mike go in my place, we still have Riley to take into consideration." I shook my head.

"This is your case, I'm sure Mike can stay behind to watch after Riley with me." He flexed his jaw and I laid a hand on his thigh.

"It isn't worth it for me to have to leave all of you behind for a trip that anyone on the force could take." I shook my head. I looked over to see the anguish in his face.

"Edward you have to finish what you started. You've put too much into this just to let it be passed off someone else."

"I've also put a lot of time into my family like I should be. I can't just leave you all and leave for god knows how long."

"We can compromise, but you are going to Chicago."

"Compromise," I nodded. "Compromise how?"

"I don't know we'll figure it out later, but you can't pass this up, I won't let you."

"Let's just drop it, okay?" I smiled and nodded at him he gave me a slanted grin back. He didn't say anything else; the conversation ended for now, but he knew we would have to finish when we got home.

"Mommy!" Ellie growled as she ran towards the car, I swung open my door and she jumped at me. I took her face in my hands and examined her for any Alice induced bruises. When there were none I held her to my chest.

"Hi, Baby." I kissed her forehead and hitched her up on my hip. "How was Alice?"

"It was okay."

"No, I asked about Alice."

"And I answered." I smiled at her and we headed towards the house where Alice promptly shoved Seth at Edward, sneered at Ellie and left the house.

"What's wrong, Daddy?" Ellie asked peaking around my neck at him, he shrugged.

"He's just kind of tired." I lied, "Are you guys hungry?" Ellie nodded and Seth bounced in Edward's arms happily. We all headed into the kitchen and Edwards phone beeped with a text. He glanced at it and sighed heavily.

"Bella we might need to start thinking about this compromise." I looked up at him from over the sandwich that I was making and furrowed my eyebrows.

"What?"

"They want me to leave in two days." My jaw dropped and I sputtered.

"Isn't that a little soon?" He shrugged.

"Where are you going, Daddy?" Ellie looked at him and he gave her a sad look in return. It would be the first time he and Ellie were separated at length, in years.

"Hopefully nowhere." He said softly before pulling her into a hug.

"Daddy is going to Chicago, pumpkin." I said gently I put her sandwich in front of her before giving Edward baby food for Seth accompanied by a stern look.

"Where is Chicago?"

"It doesn't matter." Edward whispered loudly, "I'm not going." I rolled my eyes and shook my head.

"Edward, you don't even know how long you'll be gone I'm sure they'll bring who ever goes in for questioning back to the station here. You most likely just need to go for a little while." I set down a plate in front of him and he pushed his chair away from the table and pulled me into his lap.

"I don't wanna go…" He whined into my shoulder, I sighed heavily.

"I still don't know where Chicago is," Ellie interceded.

"Don't worry, Ellie, you will get to all over Chicago when we go to visit your father."

"Daddy why are you going to Chicago?"

"I'm not going-"

"Yes. You. Are." I looked at him with wide eyes. I probably looked more crazy than scary, because he laughed at me.

"Is this your compromise?"

"Yes, we don't live in the freaking eighteenth century, there is transportation, computer with chat and wait get this, phones that you can go mobile with," he gasped sarcastically. "I know right. Please baby, I really want you to do this, I think it will make you really happy if you finish this yourself."

"Daddy I want you to be happy. I also want to figure out where Chicago is." I smiled at her.

"It's where daddy has to go for a business trip." She narrowed her eyes at me. I turned on Edwards lap and started spooning food into Seth's mouth.

"It's across the country Ellie, you don't want your daddy all the way over there do you?" Edward said sadly.

"Ellie we'll get to visit him at times and see the city" I added over my shoulder.

"I'm gonna miss you a lot," she her mouth turned downward.

"See, I don't want my little girl crying because she doesn't have her dad around, what kind father would I be?"

"A father that would bring her cookies to say sorry for be gone so long." Ellie head shot up.

"Chicago has cookies, Daddy you _have _to go!" she jumped out of her seat. "Leave now and don't come back without them."

"See you can go. Ellie says so." Ellie nodded and Edward put his head on my shoulder.

"Yeah, you two are really making me feel loved right now." He sighed dramatically into my neck. I laughed lightly when his breath hit my neck. I kissed his forehead. "I'm sure Seth doesn't want me to go right, Buddy?" He tickled the giggling child. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I pulled it out to see a text from Charlie.

_**Did you want to go to Chicago with Edward?**_

_We were just talking about it, I think I'll be staying with Seth and Ellie._

_**You sure? You could take the kids with you.**_

_To risky._

_**LOL**_

I wrinkled my nose, is that funny?

_What?_

_**Alright. I meant to say alright… Auto correct.**_

_Okay, Dad.___

"Can we help you pack?" Ellie asked once I looked up. Edward nodded before easing me off of his lap so that he could stand. My phone buzzed again.

_**He'll be gone for two weeks if everything goes accordingly.**_

_Okay._

"Two weeks?" Edward nodded and stood before pulling Seth out of his chair and heading up stairs with Ellie on his tail. Alec rounded the corner as soon as they were gone.

"You need help?" He asked as I put the plates they ate off of into the dishwasher.

"I'm fine," he leaned against the counter and watched me load up the dishwasher. "Did Edward talk to you yet?" He nodded and shrugged. "Was he nice?" I raised an eyebrow and he was quick to defend Edward.

"Yeah, no, he was great. It helped a lot, thanks." It was my turn to shrug.

"It was Edward who talked to you, not me."

"Mommy?" Ellie yelled before she came skidding into the kitchen, she gave Alec and I a calculating look before settling for glaring at him. She was still a bit pissed about the whole being led on by her uncle thing.

"Ellie don't run in the house."

"If you don't make Daddy go me and Baby will love you forever." She widened her eyes and hugged my legs, pressing her cheek into my stomach.

"I know Daddy gave you something for saying that." I rolled my eyes. Edward was just holding himself back. If he honestly wanted to stay here then he would have called Charlie and said no. He was battling a war in his head, all the while trying to convince himself that it was a better idea to stay at home. He was only trying to have me hold him back when he asked me not to let him go. He wasn't six for gods sake. He didn't need permission.

"No he didn't." She said softly, her cheeks turned red and I chuckled at her. "I just don't want him to go." She rubbed her toe into the ground and smiled innocently up at me with her hands behind her back.

"Honey, Daddy has a job to finish."

"Why can't he finish here?"

"Because."

"Because what?"

"I said so."

"That's not a good enough answer, Mommy."

"Says who?"

"Mr. Yorkie." She said holding her head a little higher. I tried not to show my anger for that little prick, they couldn't move Ellie out of his class because the only classes that could accept new students were the classes taught by Mr. Yorkie.

"Mr. Yorkie said that because doesn't explain anything. He asked me why I said girls were better than boys. I said because. He said that's not a good enough answer. I said well then because I said so." She rambled. "He said that I wasn't a good source. I said you aren't a good source! Mr. Yorkie. Not you Mommy." She smiled at me before continuing to rant.

"Ellie honey, slow down okay?" Alec patted her shoulder and Ellie frowned.

"Don't be rude to Mr. Yorkie for the hell of it." I handed over a dollar and she grinned. "It's rude. Daddy taught you better." I'd like to say I taught her better,, but I threatened to castrate the bastard so I'd be a little hypocritical. Alec snorted softly and I rolled my eyes. My phone buzzed again.

_**Change of plans team. We'll be leaving tomorrow morning at seven am. Be late. Be left.**_

_Why are you leaving earlier?_

_**Unable to catch a later flight. The holidays have fucked up the plane schedule.**_

I frowned at Charlie's text and pocketed the phone. I kicked the dishwasher door closed before excusing myself and going up to the bedroom where Edward lay with Seth on his chest sleeping. Edward peeked up at me when I shut the door softly. I held up my phone and he nodded before letting his head fall back against the mattress.

"Seven…"

"You're sure you don't want to go?" His eyes bore into mine and I scooted into a comfortable position the door downstairs banged closed and I shot up, peeking out of the window to see Alice's car.

"I got bored. I'm back!" She screamed before Ellie screamed in protest and the television clicked on. Edward sat up slowly, cradling Seth's sleeping form in his arms before laying him on his back between us, and scooting into a sitting position next to me. I laid my head on his shoulder.

"I don't want to go without you." He threw an arm around me and pulled me tightly to his side. "But oh well guess there's plenty o' fish in the windy city, huh?" He nudged me and I glared. He pulled me to him and peppered my face with kisses goofily while I struggled to get away, being mindful of Seth in between us of course.

"Oh you're lucky I love you."

"I was thinking the same thing." I sighed, he kissed my cheek again. "We need to pack. For your trip." I clarified before standing up and adjusting Seth so that he laid more centered on the bed. Ellie thundered into the room shortly after we had started to pack.

"Um… I thought you were letting him stay." She furrowed her eyebrows.

"Ellie, he'll be back in two weeks okay." I attempted to comfort Alice showed up at the door behind Ellie and smiled.

Ellie's face crumpled and she whimpered, "Don't leave."

Edward ran a hand through his hair in stress and Ellie abruptly dropped to the ground and started flailing around wildly while letting out piercing shrieks. Alice leaned against the doorway in laughter while Edward and I looked on in shock. Ellie had never lost her shit like this before and honestly she was scaring the shit out of me. She threw her arms and legs into the air throwing them around before she arched her back and wailed again. I was horrified as I crept closer to her. She screamed again and Alice moved out of the way as Ellie crawled her way out of the room, still shrieking.

"What the _hell_ was that?" Edward asked wide eyed, I shook my head wordlessly before making my way out of the door.

"That hurt. I don't know how Kaitlin does it every day." She muttered sounding completely normal, I stopped in my tracks and just listened.

"Yeah well you have to have experience with this kind of thing." Alice said I heard papers flipping. "And ten. That was so worth it. Next time try and look more upset than possessed."

"Yeah yeah." Ellie placated, "Don't BS me woman. I can count this is only seven dollars." More money flipped and Alice sighed.

"I'm going to tell your Mommy you said BS."

"I'm going to tell your Mommy that you're lose." Ellie countered.

"Ah… Touche."

…**TEC…**

**Hope you laughed and or enjoyed!**

**Well school is back in for me so things will be a bit more hectic than usual especially since I will be in my first drama production! We are doing **_**Fiddler on the Roof**_** so wish me luck… :D**

**I'm aware that this chapter was shorter. I have my first cast practice in about 40 minutes and I wanted to get this out… so yeah.**

**Oh look at our Eddie. Resident Drama queen haha**

**Review and if we reach 480 I'll update tomorrow!**

**I love hearing from you all!**


	20. Chapter 19

**Thanks to: K, Kamryn, muzaklover, Clickchick18, jh, dowlingnana, dr. meow1234, Cockerspanmom, Yummy Dummy, rlwoods, BenisseSchmidt, dazzleglo, luv2dance, melissamary55, kembie, alc1002, totes. Mah. Gotes, Kgunter34, and kelliekinz.**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

"Agh…" I groaned as I attempted to focus on the highway in front of me while simultaneously rubbing sleep out of my eyes. Once I was crust free, I placed my hand on the steering wheel and used my right hand to lay on Edwards thigh, he intertwined his fingers with mine quietly.

"Baby are you sure you're okay to drive? You look a little…" I sent him a sharp look.

"I'm fine."

"Seriously, you didn't need to get up at four for this." He ran his thumb over the back of my hand before pulling it up to his lips for a kiss.

"What? You think I'd let you go cross country with at least sending you off with a proper goodbye?" He smiled softly and kissed my hand again.

"I love you." He said softly.

"Love you too." I smiled and tightened my hand around his. I honest to goodness had no idea what the hell I would do while he's gone. After not being with him for no longer than a few hours for years straight it was harder than I thought to let him go for weeks.

"Alright a few rules while I'm gone." He said before letting a deep breath out through his nose.

_Then he said shit like that._

_Ruined it._

"Rules?" I scoffed and he nodded vigorously.

"I don't want you by yourself. At all. I don't want you alone with Riley or Mike either." I rolled my eyes and took the exit that lead towards the airport. "Don't roll your eyes at me, I'm serious. I don't want anything happening to you when I'm away." I sighed. "Don't kill anyone."

"Now that's not fair." He smirked.

"Who do you know that will clean up after you while I'm in Chicago?"

"Alice."

_Easy answer._

"Maybe if you killed a midget that weighed less than eighteen pounds…" I chuckled and pulled into temporary parking. "Be careful, Baby, seriously. If something happened while I was gone I wouldn't know what to do…" He pulled my hand up so that it was cradled in his neck and his eyes bore into mine.

"Nothing's going to happen." I assured him before pulling him into a chaste kiss. He straightened in his seat so that he could deepen the kiss and I let him. I dug my hands into his hair, pulling him closer as he slipped his tongue over my bottom lip. I swiftly opened my mouth for him and let our tongues caress each other.

He pulled away regretfully, leaving multiple pecks on my moistened lips. "I'm going to miss you, beautiful." I smiled because I would miss him too. And he called me beautiful even though I looked like shit. The girly side of me liked that.

"Yeah you can't Skype kisses like that…" I said wistfully. He smiled before opening his door and stepping out and I followed his lead. We met at the trunk of the car and pulled out his luggage. Once he shut the car door I was promptly shoved up against the trunk door his lips fused to mine again as he hitched my leg over his hip, pressing against me tightly.

"Holy… Fuck." I whispered as he kissed down my neck.

"I'm really going to miss this," he grabbed my ass and ground into me. "And this." His ands snaked up my torso until he had a firm grip on my breasts. There was a gasp behind him and technically in front of me. An older couple shuffled by looking horrified at our display.

"Sorry…" I panted heavily at them before pointing at Edward who ignored them. "He's going away for a while…" I caught a glimpse of Edwards smile before he kissed me again.

"Hot damn!" Crowley's voice called before he whistled at us.

"Fucking hell… Not again. You two honestly should see a sex specialist about this issue you're having." Charlie sighed, I think Renee told everyone on Christmas that we actually were having sex in the basement, as a punishment for not finishing out cleaning. Therefore Charlie most likely thought he had a part in bringing another sex addict into the world.

Edward huffed and set my leg on the ground to turn and greet his boss and co-worker. Actually it wasn't really a greeting more of a head jerk in their direction. I, having good manners-

_Haha_

-acknowledged them politely.

"Hi Dad. Hey Crowley." I smiled and waved only earning head jerks, similar to the one Edward gave them, in return.

"Come on, your flight leaves soon." I pulled on Edwards hand as we joined Crowley and my father.

I cast a glance at Edwards luggage and grimaced, "Are you sure you'll be okay? That doesn't seem like enough…" He smiled easily and wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me to his side with his only suitcase rolling behind him.

"I'll be fine." He chuckled softly before kissing the top of my head. "I have enough. You helped me pack."

"We have access to washers and dryers in Chicago anyway, Bells." Charlie said over his shoulder. The more they mentioned Chicago the stronger the stirring in my stomach got. I held on to Edward tighter when I started to feel woozy, leaning on him more than before. He cast a concerned glance at me, receiving a bright albeit fake smile. We strode quickly into the airport. Once we were in the boarding area I collapsed heavily in my seat, dreading Edward's absence.

"Are _you_ sure _you'll _be okay?" He asked in an accusatory tone. I nodded and rested my head on his shoulder so that he wouldn't be able to see the harsh gulp that I took. Tanya came over shortly after and plopped into the chair next to mine, dropping her large pink suitcase at our feet followed by the two other suitcases that Mike and Tyler assisted with. I tilted my head up at Edward to see his eyes focused on me.

"You're bags should look like that." I mumble softly. He smirked and twirled a finger in my hair. Tanya tapped my knee and I swiveled my head towards her curiously.

"What's wrong with you?" She asked loudly.

"Shut up, Tanya." I muttered petulantly. Yeah it was weak but whatever.

"The one way to Chicago boards in fifty minutes." A woman's voice filtered through overhead. A large man holding a stinky ass burrito passed me and the contents of my stomach lurched into my throat. I winced before attempting to push the bile back down.

"I'm going to the bathroom." I slapped Edwards arm to get his attention before darting into the bathroom. I slammed my way into a stall once in the restroom and retched into the bowl.

"Oh fucking hell…" I groaned before throwing up into the bowl again.

There was a commotion right outside of the bathroom, "You can't go in there!" Tanya huffed.

"The hell I can't. She's obviously sick." The door opened but I didn't here anymore footsteps as it closed quickly.

"I'll go in. Just… wait." I could hear by her tone that she was grimacing at my frantic husband. The door opened again and the distinct sounds of heels hitting the tiles rang out. I leaned over the toilet again and emptied my stomach.

"Ugh…" Tanya groaned as she nudged the unlocked stall door open. "Are you okay?"

I wiped my mouth sloppily before using my other hand to wipe my eyes, I cry when I puke.

Sue me.

"Peachy." I gasped before letting loose another pile. She swept some of the loose strands of my hair away from my face and rubbed my back awkwardly. When I stopped barfing she handed me a wad of tissues and patted my forehead with the extras that weren't used for my tears and the barf around my mouth. The bathroom door opened and Edwards soothing voice called out to us.

"Edward. What'd I tell you about the bathroom?" Tanya growled and he snorted at her.

There was a disgruntled huff, "Sorry, Ma'am." Edward sounded bashful and the tell-tale sound of the door opening wider sounded before there were soft slow taps moving around the public bathroom. I leaned over the toilet again expecting to wretch again and when I didn't I leaned against the stall wall with a heavy sigh.

"What happened, Bella?" Edward asked from the doorway, the woman in the stall next to mine gasped and we all ignored. I wasn't sure, It could have been Edwards leaving or the fat man's burrito. Hell it could have been a mixture of both. I wasn't going to admit the prior to Tanya though.

"This guy passed me a while ago and he was holding this _disgusting_ smelling burrito." I frowned, thinking about the smell and stood to my feet shakily.

"You had to do all of that because of a burrito?" Tanya said with a sneer, I held myself back from smacking her. Practice for when Edward left.

"Tanya shut the fuck up." There was a disapproving huff next door and I rolled my eyes. "Are you okay, Baby?"

"Yeah… I'll be out in a second." I said before leaving the stall and immediately heading to the sink, washing my hands and face and rinsing out my mouth. An elderly woman exited the stalls and her eyes met mine in the mirror.

"Public bathrooms are _not_ homeless bathing facilities." Tanya handed me a towel and smirked.

I straightened up over the sink. "Do I look like I'm fucking taking a bath, old bat?" She glared at me and I glared back. "Who the hell do you think you are? You don't even know me!" My voice raised and Tanya laid a hand on my shoulder which I shrugged off. I caught a glimpse of Edward in the doorway pinching the bridge of his nose, before he stepped into the bathroom and took my hand before I hurt the old bitch's feelings.

"Excuse us." He said softly before tugging me out, she looked like she had seen a ghost and hadn't moved an inch since I yelled at her. Once we were out of the bathroom Edward cupped my face in his hands. "Bella. What's going on? There is no way the smell of a burrito set you off. I've seen you eat burrito's more disgusting than that."

"I don't know." I admitted honestly, he pulled me into a hug and rested his cheek on the top of my head.

"I'm staying with you." He said hugging me tighter. As much as I fucking wanted him to stay I couldn't let him do that.

"No. This is most likely nothing more than a bug, Honey. Go to Chicago." I patted his chest and pulled away from him. He cupped my jaw and searched my eyes. "I'll be okay. If I need help I still have Alice, and Riley and… Mike?" He grimaced at the mention of Mike and Riley being at my assistance when he couldn't be.

"Bella…" He whined I put a finger to his lips.

"I'll be fine." He sighed and glanced over to where the team sat wives included. He pointed and the gestured for someone to come over and less than a few seconds later Alice skipped up toting Jasper.

"What's up?" She beamed.

"I need you to drive Bella home," Edward said.

"Why?"

"She isn't feeling well. Just leave my car in long term or something, okay?" I huffed before nodding reluctantly. Alice gave me an appraising look.

"You look like shit." Edward wrapped an arm around my waist holding me to him tightly.

"You don't want to piss off the person giving you a ride home, Baby." I sighed and Tanya exited the bathroom followed shortly by the old lady. Tanya put a hand on Edward's arm and leaned up before whispering in his ear. And when I say leaned up, I mean fucking against him. I frowned when I peeked around at her, she smirked and patted his chest before joining the rest of the team.

"What was that?" I said with a pointed glance to Tanya's retreating form.

"Nothing, I have to go soon." He kissed my temple and I clutched onto him for a while longer.

"The flight to Chicago boards in ten minutes." A monotone voice boomed from overhead. The three of us eventually rejoined the group to see the team off. Once we had taken our seats again Charlie sent me a concerned look.

"You alright there, Bells?" He patted my back and I nodded before leaning into Edwards embrace.

"I'm going to miss you." I whispered with my head tilted down so that he didn't get a whiff of my wretched breath. His arm tightened around me and he pressed a kiss to my hair.

"I'm going to miss you too, beautiful."

I smirked, "I've got a few rules for you too." He snorted, "Don't drink out there. I doubt any of them are going to want to have to take care of a moody drunk. Don't sleep with anyone else, because if you come home with an STD I'm going to castrate you. Then there's you know... us being married and whatnot." I felt him smile into my hair as I whispered sternly. "And call or Skype me every day."

"Yes, Bella." I nodded and smiled to myself.

"The flight to Chicago is now boarding row A." The woman said boredly.

"That's us Ladies and _boys_." Charlie grumbled as he grabbed his luggage. He kicked Emmett's foot making the sleeping oaf shoot up.

Edward and I stood, "Bye, Honey." I whispered sadly, before throwing my arms around his neck and pressing my body to his tightly. "I love you."

"I love you too, baby. Take care of yourself and give Ellie and Seth a hug for me. Okay?" I nodded and kissed his neck. Before watching him hands in his ticket to the flight attendant and enter the tunnel.

"See you later, Belly-pie! Kiss the kiddies!" Emmett boomed before kissing my cheek and hugging the breath out of me.

"I will, bye, Em." I moved to hug Charlie as well before heading back towards Alice and Rosalie.

"What happened to you?" Alice asked as she wrapped an arm around my waist.

"I don't know. It must be that time of the month I guess." I muttered, Rose smiled before whispering in Alice's ear. Alice's face lit up and she beamed at me.

"More like it's time for you two to slip on those ugly red sweaters, my wittle Babymaker." She pinched my cheek and I blanched.

…TEC…

**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**

**Well yup. Breaking the news ladies! Sweater time!**

**Okay so this is kind of a onetime only thing because even though I appreciate your reviews I barely ever reply to them.**

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	21. Chapter 20

**Thanks to:****Melnaugh, clickchick18, emma08, totes. Mah. Gotes, DenisseSchmidt, dr. meow1234, videl gohan son, luv2dance, alc1002, Cockerspanmom, sara-faith, K, Ella, Sylvia, muzaklover, Kgunter34, MaryMary123, dowlingnana, melissamary55, kembie, Alyssa, Kamryn, Kayla, dazzleglo, and blue eyes lover.**

**I love your reviews and they mean **_**so**_** much to me. I can't stress it enough! Thank you all. I only was asked a few questions and if I didn't answer yours then leave a review telling me so and restating your question, I'll make sure answer it this time!**

**I know this is short but like I said, things are getting really hectic and I've barely had anytime to write. But I got it out just because you all are so amazing, and we reached our goal... a little to late, I'm sorry :( but thank you!**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

"Eww!" Ellie squealed as she stood behind me holding my hair as I wretched violently. "What did you eat?" She gasped as she leaned over my head to examine the contents.

"Ellie. I told you-" _Oh my god, was it even possible for something that big to come out of my throat like that?_ "To go to your room or something…"

"No, cause I want you to be okay, Mommy." She said in a no nonsense tone. I felt her little hand slip into my back pocket and grab my cell phone. The buttons clacked as she thumped roughly on them.

"What are you-?" This was fucking disgusting.

"Hello?" She paused, "Mommy is throwing up really hard. And-" She waited a second. "I don't think she's drunk." She leaned over my shoulder. "No." She paused again before whimpering. "When are you coming home?" She took a pause and I made a grab for the phone. I really didn't want her worrying Edward while he was so far away. She stepped over to the other side of the bathroom so that I couldn't reach her. "I miss you, Daddy." She sighed sadly, I ran my hand through my hair and tugged on the roots gently.

I hated that my little girl was so heartbroken over Edward's leaving. She asked me every morning when we woke up how soon it would be until he came back. He still had more than a week plus to get back from Chicago and they aren't able to find the CEO or anyone that would have had contact with Mr. Volturi from Santino Inc. it seemed that they had all gone M.I.A.

"I love you too, Daddy… Who?" She huffed and her eyes widened incredulously. "Why would I call her? I have no need for her here." Edward spoke a little bit more and Ellie stared at me while he spoke. "She _does_ look like crap." She sighed. I slumped over and rested my head on my folded arms, which lie on the toilet seat. "Okay, Daddy. But watch out, her breath _stinks_." I frowned as Ellie moved closer to me; I snatched the phone from her hand and childishly breathed on her. She grimaced and kicked my leg softly in retaliation before running out of the bathroom.

_Yeah, that was gross… shouldn't have done that._

"Don't run!" I screamed after her before holding the phone up to my ear. Edwards laugh filtered through the speakers and I smiled, I missed the hell out of him.

"Hi, Baby." I sighed, my voice had been scratchy sounding since he left and the first day I started getting sick. I sounded like a hard core chain smoker.

"Bella, Bella, Bella…" He tsk'ed, "And you say I'm the lightweight."

"I'm not drunk, Jackass." I huffed. Rose and Alice assumed that with all of the _Monkey sex,_ as she had put it, that we'd been having it would be shocking if I wasn't pregnant. I used the pill though and our sex life wasn't as rampant as everyone assumed. Ellie reentered the room with her cheeks flushed and her lip curled up.

"Didn't I tell you to take care of yourself?"

"Sorry my immune system doesn't take well to commands." I rolled my eyes and I could almost hear him smiling. "But anyway, how's Chicago?"

"It's okay. But don't change the subject. Where is Alice?"

Ellie screamed into the phone, across the room. "I don't want you here either. But it looks like you're going to have to woman up and get here and help me!" I assumed that she was speaking with Alice.

"Alice is at her house, she isn't my caretaker, Edward."

"She told me that she'd watch after you. Are you taking anything?"

"No. But I just need to clear my system… which I'm doing." There was an annoying wail at his end of the line and my eyes narrowed into the toilet.

There was a bit of fumbling and Edwards words were muffled, he had the speaker covered.

"Will you please come over Ali?" Ellie rolled her eyes as Alice babbled. "I know she yelled at you but she needs help and she won't let Riley do it. Please?" I tuned her out and listened back to Edward, he was still talking even though I couldn't make out words. Yeah I had yelled at Alice but, if you were hunched over a toilet throwing up the last years' worth of food would you be interested in getting new baby furniture?

_Didn't think so._

"Edward? Where are you?" My stomach finally settled out and I stood shakily from my spot at the toilet before flushing and dragging myself over the sink turning on the water and splashing it on my face and brushing my teeth.

"What?" He covered the speaker and whispered loudly again, I sighed before sloppily plopping onto the covered seat.

"Where are you?"

"Oh, in my hotel room."

_The fuck was Tanya doing in there?_

"The fuck is Tanya doing in there?" I said angrily.

Ellie patted my shoulder, "I know you're sick. So I'll get my dollar from your wallet later."

I ignored her and she started screaming into the phone again. "Edward? Why is Tanya in your hotel room?" I grinded my teeth as I waited for an answer.

"Um… okay well you're not going to like this, Baby… Maybe I should tell you when I get back."

"Tell me right the hell now!" I demanded as I felt tears well in my eyes, he gulped on his end and Ellie's hand shot out and she held up two fingers.

"Well Tanya and I ended up rooming together." I hung up the phone after his words, before throwing it across the room sending it crashing into the tub. Ellie screamed at the loud noise before dropping the home phone and darting out of the bathroom. I slid off of the toilet and crossed my arms over my knees before burying my face in them. A few minutes later I felt a large hand on my heaving back.

I looked up to see Alec looking concerned, "What are you doing here? Get out! I look like shit!" I screamed, he shrunk away.

"Bella, calm down it's okay. What happened?" He rubbed my back and I couldn't stop crying long enough to tell him. "Take deep breaths…" And now he was telling me what to do? I just couldn't stop. My chest burned with the sensation as I gasped for air. "Come on Bella, calm down. The kids are here." He said in an attempt to soothe me? The fuck. How did that help?

I opened my blurry eyes to see Ellie and Seth at me feet, they both cried with me, Seth more so than Ellie, and the home phone rang at Ellie's feet. I turned and threw myself into Alec's arms, burying my head into his shoulder and soaking his green t-shirt.

_It was so pretty._

I fisted his pretty shirt tightly as my sobs intensified. I wanted Edward here so that he could hold me, while I flipped the fuck out. I wanted Alice here so she could tell me to Block. What would be even better is if I had Edward covered in chocolate singing _Please Don't Go Girl._ And now I missed Edward again.

Heels clanked across the linoleum of the kid's bathroom. That sound was so fucking annoying.

"Hey." Alice stood above Riley and I with a stern look on her face. "Get up, Bella. Don't be a baby. Wipe your eyes." Her eyes widened at me menacingly and my cries started to subside. I held out my hand and she pulled me up to my feet, before promptly pushing me down onto the covered toilet. I gasped for breath while she picked up the discarded landline and answered it, all the while kicking Alec and the kids out. She crouched down in front of me and gripped my hands, cradling the home phone and speaking rapidly into it. I let the last few of my tears leak out as my parched throat screamed in protest.

"Eh she's-" She was going to say pregnant. Which I wasn't. I panicked and popped her in the side of the face. You see, it sounded like a slap but it wasn't hard! I promise. She gawked at me. "She's being a bitch right now." She directed her attention to me. "Don't fucking slap me." She growled before speaking into the phone again. "Okay Edward." She pressed a button. "You're on speaker." She set the phone on the counter and Edwards worried voice echoed in the bathroom.

"Bella? Let me explain, Baby." He begged.

"I miss you so much…" I started crying while I stared at the phone.

"I miss you too, Bella. What's going on?" Something clicked in me and my face heated as I started growling.

"You fuck-face! You're rooming with Tanya! You-" Alice covered my mouth with her hand and she quickly took the phone off of speaker and put it to her ear.

"What'd you do?" She was quiet for a while and I collapsed back into tears, because I was a fucking terrible mother. I had broken down in front of them, and then sent them off with this guy who has a mark and possibly a price on his head. Alice sat in my lap and I put my head on her shoulder letting her comfort me with her bony little arm. "Oh well that's a comfort. Well no… I guess not for her, but if it were Jasper. I would kick his ass." She shrugged and I let my tears soak her shirt. She handed me the phone and I held it to my ear.

"Bella, honey, calm down…" I sniffled into the phone as he spoke rapidly. "I was put in a room with Tanya because they didn't feel that putting her in a room with one of the single men was proactive. I know you're thinking why me? Emmett insisted that his 'pure unadulterated sexy' would be too much for her to handle. So he roomed with Jasper."

"What about your pure unadulterated sexy?" I cried softly.

I could almost hear his big ass head growing, "Odd man out, baby." He snickered.

"It's not funny." I groaned, he sobered up and Alice patted my head. I heard Charlie's voice before Edward said quietly, "I have to go... Call you later. Feel better, I love you."

"I love you too, Bye." Alice snatched the phone from my hand before pulling a little box out of her bag and standing to pitch the trash. She handed me a stick and I frowned at it.

"I'm not pregnant." I said. Why the hell would I be pregnant? I was on fucking birth control. It's not one hundred percent effective but _come on_.

"Take the test, Masen." She forced it under my nose and I frowned.

"Fine but you have to leave the room." She rolled her eyes before stomping out of the room. I glared at the fucking stick for about ten minutes before Alice came knocking.

"Yes or no?"

"I'm sorry I missed the question." I said as I gripped the stick tightly.

"Bella!"

"I haven't taken it yet!"

"Don't make me-" I stayed quiet, I mean, what is she going to do? "Never mind… Bella, the test won't make you pregnant, it just tells you. Also, if you aren't pregnant, I'm going to punch you in the fucking face for being so moody." She pounded on the door and I pulled down my pants and pulled up the toilet cover before peeing on the little white stick. I set it on the sink before washing up and letting Alice in. Ellie followed after her and glanced curiously at the stick on the sink.

"Sad face, sad face, sad face…" I chanted with my eyes tightly shut.

_Sad face, babyless. _

_Smiley face, sad Bella._

"What you don't want the joy of new life?"

"I'm good with two lives and one count of hard ass labor. Thank you very much." I started to feel light headed and rested my head against the tub.

"Mommy?" I hummed and she crawled towards me. "You need a hug?" I nodded and she wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Aww, Baby." I kissed her soft cheek and hugged her little body to mine. "I love you." I kissed her cheek and buried my nose in her hair. Alice stood as her phone let out a soft beep.

"It's time." I nodded and stood, propping Ellie up on my hip. The three of us approached the stick as if it were a bomb about to detonate. "Are you going to look or can I?" Ellie leaned over in my arms.

"Mommy! It says be happy. Don't worry." She patted my shoulder and hugged me again. My eyes widened and I froze.

"Congrats, Momma." Alice hugged me tightly before jumping away happily. "Oh! Can I call Edward?" I shook my head and she sighed before producing another box.

Fifteen minutes later we were all standing around two smiling bastard sticks. Most women loved being pregnant… or the reward of their pregnancy or some shit like that. To be honest, I love Seth with all my heart but my pregnancy had to be the worst experience I've had. I was sick for most of the time, and when I wasn't I was screaming or crying.

_That shit ain't cute._

"Can I call him now?" I shook my head once again. "I don't have any more tests."

"He'll freak out and want to come back home."

"Yeah, as he very well should! He should be here with his pregnant wife and kids. While I'm at it he can bring my Jazzy pie with him too." She sighed.

"Oh fucking hell, don't you realize how much this will mess up the case? What if everything starts getting serious when I look like a freaking whale? I can't fight anyone while I'm pregnant! And how am I going to protect Riley, if I can't even see my own shoes?" I frowned and she shrugged. "I don't want to get in his way."

"You wouldn't get in his way, Bella." Riley snorted next to me. "He'd probably be overjoyed and _want_ to be at home." Alice nodded and rubbed my arm soothingly.

"So Bella what are you going to do? About the baby I mean." She had a worried look in her eyes.

"The same thing I did with my other two babies." I answered obviously. I couldn't even consider getting rid of my baby, terrible pregnancy or not. I was married had a stable income and plenty of my fucked up Bella love to go around. A new baby won't be the worst thing in the world.

"I'm not a baby anymore." Ellie protested.

"No you aren't. Let's get out of here my back hurts." I put Ellie down and led the ladies into my bedroom, calling for Riley on the way. He showed up soon after we all entered the room. I laid down in the bed, letting Ellie curl up next to me. When Alec came in sans my youngest I panicked.

"He's in the nursery, asleep. Calm down." He sat on the Ellie-less side of the bed while laid across the bottom of the bed. "Bella, what's going on?" I shrugged, not knowing if I should tell him or not.

Alice's cell phone rang and I hugged Ellie to me, as soon as her head hit the pillow she was out like a light. "Hello?" There was talking on the other end of the line and she started getting all lovey dovey with Jasper, I assumed. Ellie awoke from her peaceful sleeping to shoot up and tell Alice to stop kissing Jaspers butt, and that he went away for a reason. She quickly fell back asleep after a scolding, accompanied by tears, on my part.

I swatted away the arising tears as I started to think of Edward."Bella? Bella?" Alec snapped his fingers in my face. "What's wrong with you?"

"Oh the usual, wallowing in my own angst." I laid my head on his shoulder. "I miss Edward and chocolate… will you get me some chocolate, Riley?" The front door banged open and I immediately reached into my nightstand grabbing my gun and tucking it into my waistband. Alec's eyes widened comically as I pulled the nine out of the drawer quickly.

"Stay here." I told the two of them, they nodded and I crept through the hallway, until I had a good view of the front door, and Mike stomping the snow into the rug.

"Why hello, beautiful!" He greeted before blowing me a kiss. He took off his coat and made himself at home.

_Fucker._

"How did you get in my house, Newton?"

"I got a new key from your boy toy!" He said before shaking Edwards key chain at me. "You know, since I'm going to be staying around here twenty four seven, until you Masen get's back." He shrugged. "I can be like his replacement. Don't worry though, babe. I'll be much better than he ever was."

…TEC…

**Hope you enjoyed and/or laughed!**

**Also! Yeah, Bella's moods are high and low… she's pregnant…**

**Which would you rather see next? A future take (As in many years into the future) or an EPOV that follows this chapter, chronologically?**

**Review! If we get to 530 I'll update tomorrow!**


	22. Chapter 21

**Thanks to: (Almost 20+ reviews from an anon. reviewer. I think you get that I'm mentioning you ;)) dowlingnana, dr. meow1234, steph A15, muzaklover, DenisseSchmidt, videl gohan son, totes. mah. gotes, KRmahal, kembie, Kgunter34, puss-is-in-boots, kelliekinz, christmastree, Mrz. JasperHale4Ever, dazzleglo, alc1002, storyluvr12, Cockerspanmom, Yummy Dummy, MaryMary123 (Haha I would be mad as well, but if I were in her position I would get overly mad and start crying hahaha. Sorry you didn't laugh, but I loved your review!) **

**You're reviews really inspire my writing!**

**To my Anon. reviewer,**

**Okay so I am having a review issue that I'm not sure on how to go about solving. This is the only way I know how to: Dear Anon. reviewer, I thank you for your eagerness in wanting me to post the next day, but I would have to ask you not to use different random names to do so… I appreciate the thought… But I would rather my review goal be set fairly. You can review as many times as you'd like but I am only going to count the reviews from (Zach, Sarah, Kate, Jane, Bette, Nay Nay etc.) as one from now on as for my review goals. Sorry. **

**Thank you, **

**Taylorishotterthanrob**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

**...TEC...**

**Epov**

"Okay, I don't know about you guys but I'm feeling pretty bad _ass_ right now." Jasper said as we approached the Patino building. It was a run-down looking building, almost deserted.

Tanya scowled at him, "We look sketchy." She straightened her suit jacket with a sharp tug.

"These suits are ridiculous." Crowley muttered, Emmett scoffed.

"No matter how much you all don't like the suits you're in them, and we're here. So it's too late." We all were dressed similar to Sandra Bullock in Miss Congeniality, with the black suit and plain white collared shirt. And much like Sandra with all looked horrible in the suits.

"What would make you think of something like this Emmett?" I said before mimicking Tanya and tugging at the end of the jacket roughly, straightening the stiff fabric.

"We look intimidating. We look… unified." He said with his head held high. Because the five of us standing outside of a rundown building looking constipated was the quintessence of intimidation. We looked lost. Tanya was perched on a fire hydrant applying makeup, and the rest of us were tugging at the itchy fabric. With the exception of Jasper who was striking James Bond poses in the reflective mirror.

"Well that's great, Emmett." I clapped him on the shoulder before leaning in. "But we aren't a fucking cheer squad."

"You guys are an ungrateful bunch of pussies!" He boomed, I couldn't tell if he was trying to look intimidating or not because if he was he was failing pretty badly. His dimples showed even more with his grimace. "Anyone else would have been grateful for a free suit." Tanya shot up angrily.

"These aren't free, Genius!" She reached over her shoulder to reveal the source of everyone's discomfort.

_The fucking price tag._

"We have to return them! How bad ass will we look when we have to wipe down our seat so that the asses aren't dirty when we take these back to Macy's?" Her eye twitched, and she was a lot more intimidating than Emmett.

We snickered at her words, again minus Jasper. "Be quiet, damnit!" Emmett yelled at us as a woman and her homely baby passed us on the sidewalk. "You guys are acting like a bunch of teenagers. Get it together." He scowled before opening the file in his hands. "We have to split up, Crowley and I will attempt to find the CEO, he should be here." He cast a glance at the tall building before looking back to Tanya, Jasper and I. Well really just Tanya and I, Jasper was too busy reciting suave lines from the '007 movies.

"You three have to find the Executive Vice President." I nodded at him and he handed me a separate file, before entering the building with Tyler. Usually when a 'unified' group like us entered places people assumed that we were some sort of mob. Tanya and I approached Jasper as he held up his finger gun, despite that and actual gun was in his waist band.

"Shaken not stirred." He purred before tossing his hair back. Tanya slapped the back of his head and he snapped out of whatever the fuck was wrong with him.

"What the hell is your issue?" I asked slowly, he shrugged and buttoned his suit a bit. "You act like you've never worn a suit before, Jasper." I rolled my eyes and peeked through the dark glass, checking for Emmett's hulking figure. When I was sure that we were clear. I opened the door and let Tanya enter the building before following her and Jasper.

"Hello, my associates and I are here to see Mr. Platt." The woman stared boredly at her nails before pressing a button on her phone. She didn't even look up when Tanya spoke. Tanya reached over the desk and tapped the woman's shoulder, before monotonously saying, "Mr. Platt." The woman rolled her eyes. If it were Bella she were rolling her eyes at, that woman would have needed stitches by now.

"Mr. Platt isn't taking walk in's. Sorry." She said unapologetically. Tanya's eyes met mine and I stepped closer to the desk.

"Look, Ms.-" I paused and gave her a smoldering look, one that I used on Bella when I wanted sex. It always worked. The receptionist had to be only a few years younger and was obviously taken with me. "is it Miss?" I frowned and curled a lip slightly. "Or _Misses?_" I sneered the word and she blank rapidly, her cheeks flushing slightly.

"It's- uh- it's Miss. Davis." She smiled widely and fluttered her eye lashes at me.

"Well _Ms._Davis, we have an appointment, of course. Why would we come and burden you as walk-ins?" She leaned forward and showed a little bit of cleavage.

_But… _hey_. I __**didn't**__ look._

_I __**am**__ still married, I haven't lost my mind._

"Oh you aren't a burden…" I didn't ask if we were but… okay? "I'll tell Mr. Davis you're here."

"Thanks, you really are a doll." I winked and darted my tongue out to wet my lower lip a bit. She followed my action, and her gaze lingered on my lipps, before I cleared my throat.

"That's enough." Jasper said as he pulled my arm, I turned to see Tanya foaming at the mouth a little bit. "Hey Denali you've got a little bit of drool…" He swiped at the corner of his mouth with a smirk. Once we were a safe distance away from the receptionist he mumbled, "You're still married, bud."

"I didn't promise to _fuck_ her. Just a little bit of flirting." I defended with a smile.

"Bella is going to be pissed…" Tanya whispered as we sat down in the large sofa. She had heard the entire roommate phone debacle yesterday. "First you sleep with me-" Jaspers jaw- hell and mine- dropped at her first statement. "Then you flirt with a receptionist… You my friend are screwed." She sat back with a smug smile.

"Slept with you my ass." I argued.

"Dude, I'm sorry but If you really did sleep with her I'm going to have to fuck you up. As per Alice…" I rolled my eyes and pushed Jasper back into the couch. Our oh so friendly receptionist came up to us and told us that Mr. Platt was waiting for us. I searched in my wallet when she gave me the 'call me' signal and handed her Emmett's business card. That ass was responsible for my rooming with Tanya and wearing this suit so yeah, he was getting a call from a flirty Ms. Davis.

Once we were out of the lobby, and the elevator we entered into a hectic looking floor. Desks were stacked with papers and we were led through the messy looking office by another quite flirtatious receptionist who had her sights set on Tanya. When we were let into Mr. Platt's office all funny business was gone. Jasper and I flanked Tanya, even though technically I was in charge of the small group. Tanya and I sat in the two chairs across from the unfriendly looking middle aged man, leaving Jasper standing behind us.

"I'll be recording this conversation, if you don't mind." Jasper said before pulling out a small device.

"Who are you?"

"Hello, Mr. Platt. Nice to see you as well. The three of us are Agents from the Port Angeles Bureau of Interrogation." The man rolled his eyes.

"The PBI? Is this some kind of joke?"

"No sir, we are FBI agents. Our office is just located in Port A." He leaned forward.

"Do I look like a stupid man? What kind of agent comes out and says I'm an agent? I watch those shows of yours."

"Not a stupid man, maybe one who watches too much television though." I smirked.

"That would explain the lack of profit this company makes…" Tanya bit from my side, I smirked and he glared. I pulled out a note pad, as did Jasper and Tanya. It's hard to copy things verbatim, especially while you're the one speaking, never hurts to have a few backups.

"How did you know a Mr. Leonard Volturi?" I stared into his eyes and noticed as they twitched a bit before he broke my gaze.

"I worked with him on occasion." We all jotted down a few things and I continued to question.

"What is your opinion of Leo Volturi?"

"To be honest, he was a pretentious asshole." Jasper chuckled from behind us.

"Aren't we all…" He sighed and shook his head in amusement. Our eyes turned to him in bewilderment at his dumbass comment.

"Continue, Mr. Platt." Tanya sighed.

"He wasn't pleasant at all. He only saw the money in everything, cared nothing for the people. He almost put us out of business, the ass."

"How do you think your CEO feels about Mr. Volturi?"

"He has no respect for him what so ever. May I ask why I'm being questioned?"

"Mr. Volturi was murdered." The man's face flashed with panic for a second before clearing completely.

"What does this have to do with me?"

"A little bit of everything. You and your boss will be coming back to Washington with us. I would advise you to finish up what you're doing here and wrap up things for a few days."

"You can't expect me to just up and leave my job… My family?" He gasped, his pale blue eyes widened in fright, he ran a hand over his sparse gray hair.

"We can and do." Jasper said strongly, Tanya and I stood together and she ripped off a piece of paper before slamming it onto the man's desk and pinpointing.

"Meet us here. We'll be calling from this number." She laid a finger on the ten digit number on the paper. "You aren't to leave the state for you risk incarceration." We all turned and headed for the door, when we heard him pick up his phone.

"There is no reason to call the police." We flashed our badges. "Or anyone else regarding the case. This is confidential and you will be put in jail for discussing this with anyone else. Do you understand?" The man nodded to me and put the phone back on the hook. We all exited the office with an air of confidence, knowing that we were a bit closer to our goal.

We left Emmett and Crowley a text explaining that we left the premises to go back to Tanya and my hotel room and go over a few things. As soon as I stepped through the door my phone buzzed in my pocket.

As soon as I answered Bella asked, "Can you talk?"

"Yeah, what's up?" I held up a hand to Tanya and Jasper before leaving the room.

"I'm about to admit myself to a mental hospital."

"Why is that?"

"There is so much shit going on here… I just need to go." She sighed.

"I don't think a mental hospital is the way to go about all of this… What happened?"

"Mike's disgusting ass is going to be here twenty four seven. So is Alice and they don't get along, causing more yelling. And with Seth's teething he's always upset and Ellie… is Ellie. Oh god I'm such a bad mother… I can't take another… I'm going to stuff Alice in a toilet, I swear. Where is Tanya?" She said panting at the end because she went a little _Alice_ on me and didn't breath between the random jumble of words.

"Tanya is in the room…" I said slowly.

"Where are you then?"

"I stepped outside to take your call, Honey." The door opened behind me and Jasper called out "Come back to bed." In a very high pitched moany voice.

"What's that?" She asked not hearing Jaspers words, I kicked the door sending it into Jaspers chest roughly.

"Just Jazz being an ass-" He ripped the phone from my hands and held it to his ear.

"You should have seen your husband today, Bella. Flirting up a storm." He laughed, a scream came from Bella's end and I snatched the phone back to hear her ranting. "Trust- broken down." He winked. "Welcome to the real world of marriage my friend."

"You fucking ass." I kicked the door again and he stumbled back from it.

Bella ranted on the other end, "Baby, calm down… It was just a distraction so that we could-"

"I'm over here puking my guts up and carrying your kid and whatnot and you're in Chicago _flirting?_" I blanched as she continued to scream. "-That fucking smiley face… Oh god… Okay just forget everything I said. It was supposed to be more romantic like you coming home and I'd jump into your arms and tell you that I'm pregnant and then we'd kiss in the middle of the airport and everyone would look at us like 'Awhh they are _so_ cute!' I would be like I know… aren't we? And then we'd skip of into the jungle happily!" She wailed out herr fantasy in an agonized tone.

"You're pregnant?" I clarified, my stomach dropped and I ran a hand through my hair. I needed to get home as soon as possible. There wasn't another available flight for days. Why the fuck was my wife struggling by herself across the fucking country, and with three of my kids no less.

_I fucked up._

"_Fuck_…" I groaned before letting my head thump against the wall in front of me. Bella was quiet though I heard a couple of sniffles from her.

"I'm sorry." She cried.

"No… Baby, no everything's okay. I love you, this is good right? Another baby." I said softly trying to soothe her. During her first pregnancy I she had completely lost her shit, in terms of her emotions. Completely off the wall. This explains her crying and hanging up and her airport sickness.

"You don't want another baby, do you?" She cried loudly.

"I mean, this isn't really the ideal time for another baby…" Her sobs intensified. "But everything will be okay. I promise, and I could never _not_ want _anything_ with you. Okay?" There was some swishing and I could tell that she was nodding. "I love you, honey. I'm coming home as soon as possible." She sniffled as her cries subsided and I sighed. The tears only lasted a little bit into her second trimester.

"Okay, Baby. I love you too." She must really be stressed; she didn't try to stop me. "Thank you." She sighed.

"No problem." I smiled into the small phone we sat in blissful silence for a while before she composed herself enough to let the rage boil in her veins.

"So _what's_ this I hear about you flirting?"

…**TEC…**

**I hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**

**Oh Jasper… He's like all of my friends rolled into one :D**

**In case you missed it at the top:**

**Okay so I am having a review issue that I'm not sure on how to go about solving. This is the only way I know how to: Dear Anon. reviewer, I thank you for your eagerness in wanting me to post the next day, but I would have to ask you not to use different random names to do so… I appreciate the thought… But I would rather my review goal be set fairly. You can review as many times as you'd like but I am only going to count the reviews from (Zach, Sarah, Kate, Jane, Bette etc.) as one from now on as for my review goals. Sorry. And in case you aren't this person and reviewing under a random name, my apologies for not including you in the 'Thanks to:' note!**

**Thank you, **

**Taylorishotterthanrob**

**Now that **_**that**_** is over with let's try and get to 585?**

**I know this was short but…**

**Yep! Go for it! **


	23. Chapter 22

**Dear lovely readers. I cranked this chapter out just because I love you all so much. Thank you.**

**Thanks to: onelove13, Kayla Chin, Yummy Dummy, dowlingnana, dr. meow1234, totes. mah. gotes, xDreamwriterx, blue eyes lover, Indianprincess28, luv2dance, KManzie, KRmahal, K, christmastree, too lazy to login (Hey just so you know I'm not just being a dick! That's the name I got hahahaha), MaryMary123, kelliekinz, DenisseSchmidt, melissamary55, videl gohan son, muzaklover, storyluvr12, and dazzleglo.**

**You all just blow me away. Thank you.**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

**WARNING: There's a whole bunch of hormonal stuff going on with Bella… Don't judge haha. There is also a lot of Mike bashing so…**

…**TEC…**

**BPOV**

_Four days or so after the previous chapter…_

"So… are you taken, honey?" Mike leaned against the doorway blocking Alice and I from leaving after yet another one of my morning sickness episodes. He winked at Alice before checking me out.

"Get the fuck out of my way, Michael." I growled, he smirked before sauntering a bit closer to us.

"Don't be like that, Baby. You know you need me." He leaned into my face and instantly I was furious. Before I was fully aware of what was going on I had thrown my fist into his stomach. Making him double over onto Alice, she shrieked and pushed him away.

He coughed for a second before smirking and whispering, "Fiesty."

"You are an idiot." Alice sighed. "Aren't you here to protect the house or some shit like that?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes." I answered for him, he straightened up and rolled his eyes. We both maneuvered around him, leaving the bathroom. I turned to Alice, "Will you make sure, Seth and Ellie are okay? Actually… bring them both in here." She nodded before skipping out of the bedroom. I flopped lifelessly into the bed and attempted to rest when I remembered that Mike hadn't left the room. I cracked an eye open to see him still standing in the bathroom doorway, watching me.

"Leave." He pushed off of the door and sat next to me on the bed. "Um… The fuck?"

"Since Edward's not here, I thought I'd step in and show you the man's touch that you're missing." His hand slid down the sheet that covered my leg and I sat up. "Or with Masen, the man's touch that you never had." My stomach flipped like crazy as I stared at his hand. I reached over to Edward's night stand and pulled out my nine.

_Right…_ before lurching over and puking into Mike's lap. His hand tightened on my leg and I knee'ed him in the back as I curled in on myself and he gasped in disgust. A shadow fell over the room, someone was blocking the little light that was let in by the wide open door.

"Bella?" I threw up again and felt tears slip out of my eyes because I was going to have to clean this shit up later. Soon Mike flew off of the bed and Riley stood over me.

"Are you okay?" He searched my eyes before turning and yelling at Newton.

"Ah…" I wiped my mouth like the disgusting ass I was. Hell I wasn't planning on puking on Newton. That shit's just nasty. I'm a better person than that.

I was _just_ going to take my gun off of safety and wave it at his dick for a while.

"Bathroom…" He helped me stand while being very cautious about the disgusting throw up on my hands and sheets. Alice came in with Ellie and Seth and most likely took in the frenzy that was Riley, Mike and I, the sheets, and the discarded gun on the bed before ushering them right back out. Riley held my hair, despite my protest and sat with me as I finished my… business. When I was done Alice brought a rag in and I wiped myself off with it.

"No… You need a shower." Her head turned to Riley. "Bye." He leveled her glare before standing.

"Thank you!" I called at him, he waived me off as he walked to the door.

"Go see a doctor." I nodded reluctantly and he left. I showered, and brushed my teeth and was feeling much better after. When I left the bedroom for the first time today I went to go fix the kids something. Mike stayed far away from me and choose to roam around the house instead, something he should have done in the first place. He wore a pair of Riley's sweatpants and a t-shirt.

"Mommy, are you going to be okay?" Ellie asked before hugging my waist, I crouched down and wrapped my arms around her tightly and nodding before smacking a kiss on her cheek. A small shriek was let out, I looked up to see Seth balancing himself precariously on his legs, using the couch for support. And then…

He fell on his ass.

Eh… at least he stood.

He crawled clumsily toward me and crashed into me. I lifted my baby boy into my arms and peppered his face with kisses.

"Hi baby!" I picked him up and held Ellie's hand as we walked into the kitchen. Mike was making his rounds in the room and Seth pointed at him and screamed, "Azz." I frowned and looked to Ellie.

"Alice." She said with a shake of her head, she took Seth's hand and looked into his eyes. "No, Baby. No. Mike." Alice entered the room and she pointed at her as she passed us. "Hoes. Don't. Know." Then she shook her head furiously, Seth joined her in the head shaking and smiled happily at her. "Good. Baby." She spoke slowly the entire time, making sure he hung onto her every word. Alice stopped at the counter well aware that Ellie was calling her a hoe.

"Hey, kid…" We all turned to her expectantly. "Shut up."

_Major let down…_

"Good one, Alice." I said sarcastically before opening the fridge and looking for something to make with Seth on my hip and Ellie right next to me.

"Why do you let her talk to me that way?" She whined and I sighed heavily.

"I teach my kids not to lie." She huffed and rolled her eyes. "I'm kidding!" I turned to Ellie. "Stop calling Alice a whore. She doesn't like it, it's rude and she's an adult and you probably don't even know what that means. Understand?" Ellie nodded and I sat Seth down into his high chair. Riley entered the kitchen and plopped into the chair across from Ellie. They struck up a conversation and I was befuddled. I stayed in my room for a day and a half and Ellie was being nice to Seth and apparently forgave Riley for the whole fake uncle mishap.

I whipped up a few sandwiches, not feeling up to making a four course lunch and set them on the table before lifting Ellie and sitting in her chair, placing her on my lap.

She leaned back against me, "I missed you, Mommy. Do you feel better?" I nodded against her shoulder and leaned over to feed Seth as he giggled and bounced in the chair.

"Isn't this adorable?" Alice muttered as she sat next to Riley with a sandwich of her own. Ellie took a large bite out of her sandwich before screaming and pulling the soggy bread away from her mouth. A tooth was lodged into the sandwich.

"Oh god…" Alice groaned as she and Alec took in the scene from across the table.

I spun her on my lap, "You lost your first tooth, pumpkin!" I squealed happily before letting out a high pitched giggle, mind you, I don't squeak or giggle.

_Hormones._

I moved Ellie off of my lap and stood to get a hand towel and a glass of salt water. Mike made another round through the kitchen and while he was checking the windows his eyes widened.

"What's wrong, Newton?" I asked as I cleaned up my daughter's mouth and bagged the tooth.

"Someone's out there." The front door crashed open and our heads shot towards it. I pushed Ellie's head into my neck as Mike pulled out a tiny ass handgun.

"Why the hell is your gun so small?" I hissed, he rolled his eyes and moved toward the foyer. "What's that going to do? Take out a leprechaun?"

I heard a click and closed my eyes as I waited for the accompanying shot when I heard. "What the fuck, Newton?" There was a small pause before he laughed. "Looks like you accidentally picked up your mothers gun." I shot up at the sound of Edwards voice and Ellie darted out of my grasp.

She screamed, in a voice that was uncharacteristically deep for her, "Daddy!" And Edward let out a loud 'umph' as she most likely ran straight into his stomach. I grabbed Seth and met with the rest of our family in the foyer. Edward was crouched down holding onto Ellie almost as tightly as she gripped his neck. And I cried.

_Fucking hormones._

"I missed you, honey." He said softly into her ear, she mumbled something back before kissing his cheek.

"You shouldn't leave me again, okay?" She said as she met his eyes, he smiled at her and nodded. Earning a kiss on the forehead from Ellie. Seth then decided to become aware of the situation and scream and bounce in my arms.

_Way to ruin a moment kid._

"Calm down, honey…" I coo'ed as I rocked him slightly before swiping at my tears. I was busy letting him try to break my finger when I felt Edward's arms around me. I balanced Seth in one arm before wrapping the other around Edward's neck and pulling him to me. I hugged him tightly pressing my face into his neck as I breathed him in.

"I'm glad your back." I whispered, he whispered in agreement back before pulling back and pecking my lips. His hand drifted to my stomach and I smiled. For the first time since I found out about the baby I thought that everything would be alright.

"What did you do to my daughter?" He asked playfully as her eyes widened when her mouth started bleeding heavily.

"Oh fuck." I whispered to myself before pushing Seth into Edwards arms and wrapping an arm around Ellie, giving her the glass of salt water and making her rinse her gums. When she saw how much blood was leaving her mouth she gasped and looked at me in fright.

"Am I going to have to need dentures, Mommy?" I smiled and shook my head.

"No, of course not. Maybe a gold tooth or two but not dentures." She took my words seriously and nodded.

"Can mine have 'E's on them? In diamond?" I nodded and rolled my eyes before leading her to a seat. Edward came up behind me before wrapping his arms around my waist and resting his head on my shoulder.

"We need to talk…" He said cryptically handing Seth to Alice before pulling me out of the room.

"I'd say use a condom… But you already knocked her up so…" Alice smirked as she passed me on the way to the kitchen. He pulled me up the steps and was about to go into the bedroom when I stopped him.

"We're kind of letting that air out, right now…" I smiled hesitantly with my hand on his chest. He quirked an eyebrow before taking me farther down the hall way to the left over guest room. He pushed me backwards onto the bed and crawled over me, kissing the ever loving shit out of me. I tangled my fingers in his hair and pressed him to me. His hands grazed my breast as he rocked into me.

"Why is the bedroom being aired out?" He asked before kissing down my neck and pinching my nipple firmly, before smirking as I moaned. I wrapped a leg around his waist and ground into him before speaking without thinking.

"I puked on Newton." His fingers left my breast and he instead used his hands to prop himself up as he gazed down at me.

"Why was Newton in our bedroom?" Oh yeah ignore the fact that I had gotten physically sick.

Love you too, Baby.

"You roomed with Tanya. So I thought that rooming with Mike wasn't all that bad of an idea…" I lied, his face went from curious to furious in a split second before he shot up.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going to kick his ass."

"Okay. Okay wait. I lied." He turned and glared at me. "Don't give me that look! You roomed with Tanya!" I yelled, I could tell that he was biting the inside of his cheek. My moods apparently wouldn't let me shut the fuck up when it was time to. He knew this.

"Yes, but we were in two separate beds and it wasn't in my fucking bedroom. It wasn't even my choice." He growled lowly.

"Okay, I'm sorry, c'mere." I scooted up on the bed and patted the space between my legs and he fell into it, letting me wrap myself around him completely. "You know you're the only person I share that room with." I kissed his neck and rubbed my hands over his toned stomach. I placed a light kiss on his back.

"I'm just still not okay with the whole Tanya situation." I admitted. "Mike _was_ in our room though."

"Why was that?" He asked obviously more calm.

Hell there was no point in beating around the bush. "He thought I'd be missing a _man's touch_ while you were gone." I snorted and he tensed under my hands, his jaw visibly clenching.

He stayed quiet and I laid my head on his back. "I love you. Sorry for pissing you off." He grabbed my roaming hands in his and brought my arms up so that they were over his shoulder and he kissed my palms.

"It's alright. Just another month… this shit…" His words faded in and out and I frowned. He stood up and went to the door.

"Where are you going now?" I asked standing too.

"A '_man's touch_', my left nut." He muttered before yanking the door open and marching down the steps.

"He already got puked on, Edward. That's pretty fucking gross…" He rolled his eyes and descended the steps quickly. When I reached the stairs I was almost running down them. I stopped at the foot of the stairs and held my arms out. "C'mere. Give Mama a hug." I patted my shoulder and mock pouted. He gave me a dry look before continuing his search for Newton. If I hadn't have puked on him this morning I'd be all for the ass kicking, but I was feeling generous. I ran towards him and grabbed his arm.

"Edward. It's not that serious, honestly. I can handle myself. If I can't at some point, you'll be the first person I call. Okay?" I pulled his arm around my waist and kissed his cheek. Newton choose then to walk past us during his walk through and blatantly checked me out. Like the dick that he is. Edward's steps faltered and I grabbed his arm, tugging him along with me.

"Bella…" He groaned.

"Why is it such a big deal?"

"I don't know. I'm the man of the house… I'm supposed to defend your honor… or some shit like that." He looked at me guiltily and I smiled because he was just too cute. "And a little bit of puke won't hurt in the morning." I held myself back from awe'ing at him, because I was feeling sappy.

_I hate that. Sappy can kiss my ass._

"Well what happens when you hit him and he goes bitching to the police about assualt?" He reached to the clip on his belt and pulled out his badge with a 'duh' look.

"Who's going to come pick me up? Emmett? Crowley?" He raised an eyebrow before suggestively slurring, "_Tanya?_" I huffed and pulled out of his embrace.

"Fine you go to jail, and be someone's bitch while I'm with child." His face softened a bit before he dissolved into laughter. "Go on! Maybe Tanya will help you out with that. Pay your bail... Take you to the doctor for ass injuries. Go!" And dramatic. I was being very dramatic today. I stomped into the kitchen before composing myself and plopping down next to Ellie at the table. She and Alec stared at me while Alice shook her head.

"You two would get into a fight right when he comes home." She shook her head again and snickered as she checked her watch. "That was some short 'welcome home' sex." I frowned and tugged a hand through my hair. Edward came in the kitchen looking kind of like Doctor Facinelli as he smiled and shook his head.

"Well I'm done here." Alec said as I glared at Edwards chuckling form. He stood and cleared his place before hurrying out. He was the polar opposite of Ellie who leaned back in her seat and sipped a juice box as if she were waiting on a show.

Edward sat in the chair next to mine and pulled my chair next to his. "_Oop_, Daddy, I wouldn't do that. She's not happy with you." Ellie warned from her seat in the audience.

"I'm sorry, I won't bother Newton. Even though you are a little on the protective side for someone who supposedly tried to _feel_ you up. Kinda looking _cooperative_." He lifted an eyebrow and I wanted to slap him. I don't know if it was the eyebrow, or if I just really wanted to hit something.

_Probably a little of both._

"I wasn't the one sharing a room with my not so secret admirer." I growled.

"My love life is going to be _jacked up_ after all of this…" Ellie muttered before waving a hand at the two of us she stood too and much like Riley left the room. We kind of ignored her, because… It's probably true.

"It _always_ goes back to Tanya." He pointed out.

"Uh.. _yeah. _Wonder why?" I cocked my head sarcastically and my eyes widened.

"I don't want to fight, Baby. I just got home." He smirked sexily at me and I was hit by an onslaught of lust, as he dragged my chair to his, so that I was between his legs. His hands drifted up my thighs and he leaned into my ear before groaning with a little hint of a moan, "Make love. Not war." Before kissing my ear and drifting down my neck. I tried. I tried so fucking hard not to give in. But _goddamnit_ you obviously haven't seen the man if you thought that I _could_ resist. I sighed and leaned into him, making him smirk into my neck.

His hands kneaded their way up my thighs before his thumb swept over the seam of the apex. "_Ungh_…" I moaned quite gutturally.

"See _that's_ what I should be hearing. Not all this noise about me being someone's bitch."

I shook my head, "You're _my_ bitch." I smiled and met his lips in a deep kiss.

"That's not quite what I meant…" I muffled his words with a kiss and smirked at his words. His hands wrapped around my waist and he pulled me up so that I straddled his lap.

"See." Alice's high pitched whine burst our little bubble. "This is what should be happening." She walked past me and patted me shoulder in… _congratulations?_ I scrambled off of his lap realizing the kitchen wasn't really the most appropriate of places for our previous activity. Especially with perverts on the loose. Mike walked by the door as if on cue and his eyes appraised me and Alice before he kept moving.

"You afraid I changed since the last time you checked me out in the hallway, Pervert?" I yelled after him, I heard his laugh. "Why don't you take a picture?" Edward stood and made his way to the door and I let him.

"Already did!" He called back and Edward darted out of the room after him. There were a few bangs and then Edward's angry voice rose up as he kicked Mike out.

Edward re-entered the room several bangs later with his face flushed, Alice raised an approving eyebrow as he passed. "Hot…"

I stepped in her line vision, "Bye, Alice."

…TEC…

**Hope you laughed and or enjoyed!**

**Edwards home, Yaiiyy! I was starting to miss him as well…**

**Please understand that Edward and Bella's relationship isn't hostile. They bicker and as Bella said in an earlier chapter it's just them.**

**Sorry for the gross content in this one… :p**

**I also realize that these past few chapter's haven't been all that plot thick. But they will be soon!**

**READERS INPUT TIME (READ): *sighs* favorite part of my day**

**Boy or Girl?**

**Review and tell me who you chose! This is going to go on for a few chapters as well so make sure you tell us which gender!**

**If you have accompanying names throw them in there! I **_**love**_** hearing from you all!**

**IMPORTANT:**

**Lets get to 605? I'm not sure that I can promise a chapter tomorrow. I'm sorry, but like I said I'm in a musical and it is honestly taking up all of my time tomorrow. Double Practice… And I ran out of prewritten chapters… like after chapter nine so I'm honestly running on fumes between school, the musical and this… But leave a review! Makes it all worth it!**


	24. Chapter 23

**Your reviews mean **_**so **_**much to me. And they just keep getting sweeter and ah… *Dramatically wipes tear with back of hand, Celine Dion style* I just love you. Thanks so much :D**

**Thanks to: SweetPJL, christmastree, jkkhreedy, oukamiwolf, melissamary55, videl gohan son, muzaklover, dowlingnana, K, luv2dance, clickchick18, kelliekinz, dazzleglo, Melnaugh, Kgunter34, MaryMary123, Allypattinson, KManzie, Cockerspanmom, totes. mah. gotes, DenisseSchmidt, rlwoods, Yummy Dummy, dr. meow1234, molliegoodgolly, blue eyes lover, and alc1002. THANK YOU SO MUCH! MWAH *Throws kisses in a dramatic fashion***

**Standard Disclaimer Applies *Dramatically… **_**Okay I'm done tehe**_*** **

…TEC…

"Bella?" A hand clamped down on my shoulder as Edward turned me onto my back. I cracked open an eye to see him focused on his hands in his lap.

"What's wrong?" There was a click and I shifted the comforter to see him cocking a gun. I shot up and my stomach twisted violently, with sickness or with nerves. He stood from the bed and held the gun at his waist.

"Stay here." He ordered before he snuck quietly out of the door and I grabbed my own gun, tucking it into the waist band of my shorts. I went the opposite way that Edward did and crept towards the steps, descending them quickly. I checked the sitting room silently before I was pinned to the ground. The cold metal a a gun barrel was pressed into my temple and my mouth was covered.

I looked into a pair of cold brown eyes and gasped. The man was definitely larger than me; his ass was on my stomach as he turned the safety off of the gun. He reached into me waistband, pulling out my gun and sticking in his own waistband. I let my muscles relax under the weight of my attacker as I was left defenseless. I gulped roughly as he pressed his hands to my throat. His fingers locked onto my chin as he forced my mouth open. My eyes widened as I locked my jaw only to receive a blow to the face, making me cry out in pain as he stuffed a leather glove into my mouth. There was a quiet click, the sound of a gun going off with an accompanying silencer and my eyes widened.

_Edward._

Oh dear god. Tears leaked from my eyes as I heard the heavy thump of a body hitting the ground on the floor above me. I lurched into the man on top of me as the thuds continued down the steps. My shoulders were shoved into the ground while my assaulter looked behind him. Then the glove was yanked out of my mouth, being replaced by the barrel of a gun, as he looked back at me. His eyes widened in fright, he probably wasn't expecting his partner to actually kill my husband. A large figure crept up behind the man before a gun was brought down. I shut my eyes and waited for the gun to fire when the weight was lifted off of me. His gun smashed into my molar roughly as he moved away.

I looked up at the figure before curling in on myself; my gun was still with the man that had taken me down. The standing figure held out his hand for me before kneeling next to me. Green eyes sparkled with worry as they looked upon me. Edward's hands frantically passed over me as he brushed the hair out of my face and turned my head from side to side. He turned my head farther to the left examining what had to be either a large purple or pink bruise marring my cheek.

"Fuck." He gasped before gently running his fingertips over the bruise. "I thought I told you to stay in the room." He said his eyebrows knitting together in worry, I sat up wrapping my arms around him.

"I thought they had gotten you." I whispered before becoming acutely aware of the fact that my mouth was bleeding quite heavily and hurting like crazy. I coughed slightly, the acting spattering Edwards shoulder with blood. "Oh god…" I coughed once more, my tooth coming out onto my palm, my eyes watered before I was in full on tears.

Edward pulled away from me, taking in my hand cupping my tooth and he growled. "Fucking bastard." He stood, bringing me up with him. He pulled me into his arms carrying me bridal style before moving around the two bodies agilely. I rested my head into his neck as he walked to the nearest bathroom sitting me on the toilet before pulling out his cell phone and pressing a few buttons. As the shock wore off, my tooth went from aching to feeling like the gun had gone off in my mouth as opposed to taking out a tooth.

"The house was broken into, there were two men, both of whom are unconscious and still here." He turned to the cabinet behind us and pulled out a hand towel before running it under warm water. He grabbed my hand and cleansed the blood off of it before holding the towel to my mouth gingerly, while continuing to wipe the blood. I put my hand over his as he held the warm towel to my jaw and leaned into his hand.

"Thank you." I murmured, but my jaw had already started to swell and it sounded more like _shane shu._ He smiled and kissed my forehead before crouching in front of me.

"Charlie. I understand, alright, they're my family too-" He sighed and rolled his eyes. "Will you stop arguing with me and send a few cars?" His head whipped to the side before he looked back at me. "Did you hear that?" Charlie screamed from the phone and Edward rolled his eyes and snapped it shut. There was a louder groan from outside the door and Edward grabbed his gun from his waist. He swept out of the room, there was another thunk and thud before he returned.

"_Wha waa thaa?_" I slurred before rolling my eyes. Edward shook his head before his eyes widened and he pulled my shirt up. "Whoa _fer buh-y. Is fis eally a good time?_" He ignored me and his cold fingers probed at my stomach.

"Did he hit you here?" He asked with fire in his eyes, I shook my head and twisted my torso with his hands. "It looks fine, when are you going to the doctor?" I met his eyes, disappointed in the fact that he didn't even know when the baby's first doctor's appointment was.

"_Isth_ _today. Why on't you member?_" I whined and slurred at the same time he winced and I started crying. There were sirens outside of the house that drew nearer and I shot up from the toilet.

"Calm down, Baby. They aren't coming for you this time." Edward said using my hips for leverage as he pulled himself to his feet. I wrapped my arms around him tightly, feeling him kiss the top of my head. We both headed to the door, before Charlie broke it down himself banging so roughly.

I pulled it open with a hand on my hip, "Are you _thrying _to _waay the whole houth?_" I asked irately, Edward pulled me back slightly as the EMT's and officers rushed past me and Charlie stepped up and cupped my jaw. He stared at it for a while before glaring over my head. My temper easily shot through the roof.

"I am a _gwown woma. I can taye cayare of myself. On't look ah im dat way. Isth yo fault ha we i-in't hah beh-er protecthion. New-ens a dick! Ey knew he wa-a'nt ere._" I growled slash lisped slash slurred.

"Bella, it's okay I should have been paying more attention." Edward conceded, I spun on him and his eyes widened. He wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me in, so that he could whisper in my ear. "Calm down it can't be good for the baby." I huffed and took a few breaths. He led me to the couch in the _sitting room_, what a _dumb_ name for a room this nice. We watched the EMT's load our attackers bodies onto the stretchers, right before pulling off the ski masks they'd been wearing. Edward shot up when the man who was on top of me was revealed.

"That's Andrew Patino." He gasped as he pointed at the unconscious man. The man had a yellow bruise on his temple, from where I assumed Edward had hit him with the butt of his gun. That fucking bruise really made me want the middle of a hard boiled egg.

"The CEO?" I asked, trying to take my mind off of that boiled egg.

"His son." He said quickly before turning and speaking briefly with Charlie. He joined me back on the couch with a smug smile.

_I wonder if he'd make me some eggs._

"Well that's a giant ass leap in the case." His eyes sparkled and he turned to me. "Wanna' hear a joke?" I squinted at him, at times like this we should be worried about the case, the safety of our children, how to get the blood out of my carpet… But he wants to tell me a joke…

_Okay I was thinking about egg yolks… so what?_

Instead I just nodded before an EMT rushed up to me, "What happened?" She asked.

"He ha-ath the gu-h in mah mouth. Ah he pull-eh ih ou-h and-" I smacked my hands together, scaring both her and Edward. "Pop ih wath gone." She sratched her head and I was about to delve back into my story when Edward interrupted.

"He had the gun in her mouth, and when I pulled him away it knocked out her tooth." He said easily. She proceeded to examine my mouth and all that jazz while Edward told his joke. "So this boy says 'Mom, why is my cousin named Ruby?' and his Mom says, 'Because his Mom likes Ruby's'." I laughed even though I didn't really get how that was funny and Edward gave me a look.

"Wah?"

"That wasn't the end."

"Oh… Goo-h that suckthed."

"So the boy says 'How'd I get my name'?"

"Ith his name Paul. He has it becauth his mofer hathes him." I said obviously.

Ugh…

Paul.

"No, Honey listen." I nodded, "His mother said 'Enough questions, Dicky'." I nodded an waited for the punch line, when he threw out his hands in a 'Tah-dah' like motion.

_Dicky…_"I get ih!" Edward nodded and laughed with me. We got a few strange looks, especially from the EMT examining me.

"Excuse me, Honey…" A soft voice said from the other side of the room, I looked over, despite the woman's fingers shoved down my throat to see Ellie standing next to an EMT trying to peak onto the stretcher with tears in her eyes. She was too short though and obviously didn't see us on the couch.

"Ellie!" I said as loud as possible around the womans fingers, her head snapped to us before she took off running across the small space. She jumped into Edwards lap and buried her face inb his neck.

"I tho-thought that was you, Daddy." She cried as she clung to him. "I wanted to tell Mommy that Baby was crying and…" He shushed her before patting down her messy hair. Tears filled my eyes as I watched the interaction.

"You're daughter?" The woman asked, I wanted to be sarcastic and say something like "_No. That's actually my great grandfather._" But I don't think my gums would be able to handle it. So I nodded.

_Yes I'm aware that that was a suckish comeback but…_

_I'm bleeding and pregnant. Focus on that._

…TEC…

**I did my best to get this out so…**

**Hope you enjoyed… I don't know about laughs… **

**Uh oh *watches shit hit fan***

**What'd you think? Hmm… Hmmm? I told you that the next chapters would be very… plot filled.**

**I'm still taking baby names. But I want another opinion. Do you all really want her to have twins? If so I need gender and names! Gimme names!**

**So far (Favorite names from each of my reviews):**

**DenisseSchmidt- Girl: Emma**

**KManzie-Girl: Sophie**

**Kelliekinz- Boy: Alex**

**Christmastree- Girl: Luna/Boy: Hunter**

**SweetPJL: Girl: Lauren**

**Thank you for your input! Today is the last chapter for name reviews! So if you have a name that you **_**really**_** want to see up there leave a review!**

**Here's how I'm going to do this. I'm narrowing it down to the names I **_**really **_**like then I'll have you vote (poll/review) On the boy and girl name you **_**really **_**love and then I'll tally up the votes on the names and see which one we like the best. I have a little something special for the reviewer who suggests the name(s) that wins!**

**Hope that made sense… Well if not just review. **

**We'll take it from there :D**


	25. Chapter 24

**Thanks to: muzaklover, dr. meow1234, totes. Mah. Gotes, SweetPJL, christmastree, Melnaugh, Cockerspanmom, videl gohan son, luv2dance, KManzie, Kgunter34, Inserthilariousnamehere, storyluvr12, rlwoods, Indianprincess28, DenisseSchmidt, dazzleglo, dowlingnana, alc1002, Jokersparadise, melissamary55, clickchick18, and Yummy Dummy.**

**You ladies are just amazing. Thank you!**

**Warning: Towards the end it gets kind of… well not happy. So beware.**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

**Just know that it is really hard for me to be able to type words in the slurred voice that Bella speaks in due to her teeth so just know that she is slurring.**

**ALSO this chapter takes place the same day as the attack, this is just later in the day. Bella mentioned her doctor's appointment last chapter!**

EPOV

"Are you seriously about to fall asleep right now?" Bella asked as she slapped my arm with a magazine. I turned my head groggily towards her and scrubbed a hand over my face wrapping the other firmly around Seth as he attempted to wiggle out of my lap. Ellie was standing at the table next to me looking through the large book/diagram of the progression of the birth. With every big, woman shaped, page she flipped her face twisted into disgust a little bit more. Alice sat in the chair on the other side of Ellie, watching the flipping pages with a similar grimace.

Why Alice was here? I'll never know. The more and more she showed up the more I realized what Ellie was saying was true. Alice really was always around.

"What's this?" Ellie asked before slapping my leg and pointing at the eight month diagram of the baby.

"That's a baby." Her eyes widened.

"It looks like a chicken…" Bella huffed in irritation before checking her watch.

"How does that look like a chicken?" Alice peeked over at Bella.

"You've never seen a chicken in a womb?" Bella asked incredulously.

"You have?" I threw in, Bella glared at me and I just sat back in my seat, not wanting to agitate. She was always angry and or yelling at me.

_Don't fall asleep._

_Get more sleep._

_Stop talking!_

_Why are you ignoring me?_

_Why are you touching me?_

_Don't love me anymore?_

_Will you hurry up?_

_Slow the fuck down, pregnant here!_

It was like she's turning into a real woman. I grimaced at the thought but smiled hesitantly when I received a harsh look from my wife. Seth turned in my lap and patted my cheek.

"What's this, Seth?" I took his hand and put it on my nose. He choose to ignore me and wrap his hand around my nose and attempt to remove it from my face. "No, buddy. No hurting. I get enough of that from Mommy." Bella slapped the back of my head and choose not to say anything.

"Aw… Calm down, I'm kidding." I tossed my free arm over the back of her chair and she frowned. I sighed and turned back to Ellie.

"Why are we here, Daddy?" She asked as she lifted Seth off of my lap.

"What are you doing?" I said as I reached for him.

"Wanna play Baby?" Seth smiled and giggled. "Okay. You _stay_." She said before setting him gently on the ground. She backed away from him slightly before plopping into my lap.

"Ellie…" I sighed, Bella rolled her eyes and picked up Seth bouncing him in her arms. "Don't do that." She nodded in response.

"Why are we here?"

"Mommy has a doctor's appointment." I said as she laid her head against my shoulder and ran her small hand over my five o'clock shadow.

"Does Mommy have that?" She asked before jerkily pointing a finger at the diagram.

"Yes. Mommy is having a Baby."

"Mommy already has a Baby." She argued, with her forehead wrinkled. She reached into Bella's lap and pulled up Seth's hand, for proof.

"Another one."

"No."

"I'm sorry?"

"Why do we need another one? She already has Baby and me. That's enough. Why'd she get another one?" I looked to Bella for a bit of help, she ignored my look and focused on Seth. Alright so the more coherent she was, the more angry she became about her face and the carpet.

And my driving.

And….

Everything else.

"I don't know. It's Mommy's baby. Ask her." Dumb mistake. I caught myself immediately after the words were out and my head thumped against the wall behind me. "I didn't mean _Mommy's_ Baby…" I stuttered as I tried to compensate for my slip up. Ellie looked confused and turned towards Bella to ask her, when I turned her to face Alice instead.

"And what the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Bella growled from next to me. I sighed in exasperation and she hit my thigh when I didn't answer.

"I meant it's in _you!_" I explained, "Dear god. Stop hitting me…" I rubbed my thigh around Ellie and sighed again. Ellie started to raise a hand and ask for the dollar she'd get for Bella's cussing. I pressed down her arm before mouthing '_not now_'.

"So what you're saying I'm heavy handed now? It _never_ stops with you." She grumbled.

"I was thinking more along the lines of man hands… but heavy works too." I joked dumbly, Alice snorted and her eyes widened as she realized how much I had just screwed myself over.

Bella's mouth opened and her swollen cheek glowed bright red. I shot up in my seat, grabbing Ellie so that she didn't fall.

"Excuse me! How long until Mrs. Facinelli is available?" I asked the receptionist.

"Oh you gonna flirt with her too?" Bella asked irately, I put a soothing hand on her knee and she slapped it. To be honest the woman had to be twice my age, she resembled Ms. Isabella more than the receptionist in Chicago.

_Not that that mattered…_

"As soon as possible, Dear." The woman said softly before mouthing '_Poor Boy'_.

"_Dear._ Agh…Old bitch." She scoffed.

"Bella." I reprimanded when the older woman looked insulted, obviously hearing Bella's comment. Ellie gasped at my tone and Bella glared at me for a second before her face softened.

And then crumpled with tears.

My eyes widened and Ellie pushed off of my lap before going to sit next to Alice.

"Why'd you move?" Alice asked as her eyes stayed trained on us.

"When she stops, she's gonna hit him. I don't want to get caught in that. She does have man hands." Ellie whispered loudly, Alice laughed lightly. Bella lifted Seth into my lap before standing and taking off, towards what I assumed was the bathroom.

"Don't worry. I'm right, she'll hit him. She's probably just going to find her bat." I frowned and took off after her. I heard sniffling from the women's bathroom. I tried the door knob and found that it was locked. My phone buzzed and I pulled it out to see a text from Jasper.

_**How's it going?**_

I sighed and typed back a quick reply, shifting Seth into my other arm.

_Is it illegal to pick the lock on the women's bathroom door?_

_**You gotta pee bro? I'm sure they'd give you a key.**_

_Bella's locked herself in there-_ My message was interrupted by another one from him.

_**Although it is a vagina hospital. You might just have to find the nearest barbershop. Get yourself a manly pee.**_

_Did you start doing drugs?_

_**Naw bro. I get high on life.**_

_Mhmm. I don't need to pee. Bella's in the bathroom._

_**Well if there's a chick you're trying to bust in on that is illegal. **_My phone buzzed once again.

_**Or extremely kinky ;)**_

I squinted at my friend's dumbass text before my phone was snatched from my hand. I looked up to see my wife's eyes scanning the short text before she let out a growl and threw it to the ground. A slap was delivered to my cheek.

"You're _Secretary_?" She asked in a high pitched voice that I hadn't heard since the last time she was honestly furious with me, which was when she found out I was rooming with Tanya. Or maybe it was yesterday morning when I burned her macaroni and cheese. "Who wants a moody _whale_ when they could have '_Secretary_ _Chicago'_." She curled a lip at me and I groaned, my stomach sinking.

"Bella…" I whispered, she wasn't really angry about the secretary, Jasper's name was prominently displayed in the top. Something more was wrong with her. Namely the incident this morning.

Heels rounded the corner and a familiar voice reached our ears, I turned to see Esme Facinelli standing at the end of the hallway. She strutted up to us and laid a hand on both of our arms. Bella's eyes narrowed at the hand on my arm, despite the fact that Esme touched her as well.

"I've been looking everywhere for you two!" Esme said happily, Seth grinned at her and reached for a hug. That kid was smoother than his old man. "How are you, honey?" She asked before kissing his cheek sweetly.

"I'm ready." Bella snapped, before spinning on her heel and walking in front of us. Esme gestured to Bella and shrugged curiously.

I patted my stomach and Esme nodded in understanding. Once we reached the lobby Bella went straight through the door of Esme's office, making room for Esme to pass before cutting me off and pointing behind me.

"Sit." She stood on her tip toes and called for Alice who stood.

"Bella, really? Isn't this something I should be in here for? You're over reacting. I know you're pissed, but you'll get over it, I won't get this appointment back." I explained, she seemed settled in her resolve and my stomach dropped. "Bella…" My words sounded strangled as I choked them out. Alice laid a hand on my back and I sighed heavily before stepping aside to let her past me. I gulped as Bella stepped back and closed the door in my face. I turned and sat down into one of the uncomfortable plastic chairs. I set Seth in the chair next to mine and Ellie took the opposite chair.

I leaned over and rested my elbows on my thigh, burying my hands in my hair. A small hand rubbed my back softly and I looked over to see Ellie smiling sadly at me.

"It'll be okay, Daddy." I pulled her close to me and hugged her tightly, kissing the top of her bouncy curls. Esme stepped out of the room before closing the door softly.

"What's wrong?" I asked at her sympathetic look, I shot up from my chair. My mind immediately jumped to the worst.

_The baby._

"Calm down, Edward. Bella and the Baby are fine, alright?" I sighed and nodded. "Are you alright? That scene at the door was…" I nodded, "You know it's her unbalanced hormone levels causing her irrational thinking and everything. There were also traces of a drug in her system. Do you know what she's using?" She asked, my eyes widened and I shook my head. "Nothing for her jaw or anything? I know some women get stressed about their hyper active emotions and want to take something to soothe them but-" I cut her off.

"She took a Percocet this morning… but that's it." Esme visibly flinched.

"That isn't good for the Baby. I'd advise you to have her stay away from that." I nodded, "I don't think it has affected the baby but if she continues to use it there is a possibility that it could. Your wife is almost two months pregnant."

_Ask us what we did on Thanksgiving._

"What should Bella take for the pain in her jaw?" Esme's eyes narrowed accusingly and I shied away from her.

"It depends. What happened to her jaw?" She lifted a judging eyebrow.

"What?" She looked down at my bruised hands and my eyes widened in horror. "What? You know I'd _never_… the fuck?" I asked in a flustered tone. "I didn't hit my wife."

Fuck me. If this day couldn't get any fucking worse.

"Mommy is the only one that hits." Ellie said softly from behind me.

Esme crouched down to her level, "Are you sure? We only want Mommy to be safe."

_You think you know someone._

_What the fuck?_

"She's safe, Esme. How could you-?"

"I have to watch out for my patients Edward. Nothing personal." Of course we couldn't speak about the case, or our being agents with the doctor but this almost made me. This is fucked up.

"It is kind of personal! You think that I would hit my wife?" I tugged a hand through my hair and the secretary kept a sneaky eye on the confrontation.

The door to the office opened behind me, "No, he'd be too afraid of the safety of his testicles if he hit Bella. Ha, his pretty boy face too. She'd _fuck _him _up_. No question." Jasper slapped my back. "I got you."

_Not helping._

"I was just asking. Her jaw is pretty badly torn up."

"Aren't you supposed to be checking out her cooch though?" I turned on Jasper.

"No seriously? Are you on drugs?" He smirked and shook his head.

"On my wife."

_Mental image… Mental image._

I scrubbed at my eyes, "You know what I mean, man. I spend too much time around her."

I didn't know she was capable of being at two places at once. It seemed like she was always with us…

"I was concerned for her safety, thank you very much." Esme sniffed.

"So what happened to her jaw?"

"Nosey…" Ellie whispered from behind me.

I thought hard, "We were robbed this morning, at gunpoint they um…" I gulped getting a mental image of that ass on top of my wife with his gun down her throat. "Hit her in the face, and yeah… Knocked out a tooth."

"Why didn't you just say that first?" I shrugged.

"Will you let me in the exam room?"

"I don't know… Bella…." She bit her lip and I frowned. "Okay, fine." She conceded.

"Come here, bud!" Jasper held his hands out to Seth who reached for him. "I've got them." He slapped my back and I followed Esme in. Bella was on the table looking quite angry as I entered. Alice bit her lip.

"Jaspers out there." I muttered awkwardly, she stood quickly.

"I called him… I'm just gonna go…" Esme entered the room and Alice looped an arm through hers pulling her out again. Bella crossed her arms and pointed those wide brown eyes across the room, blatantly ignoring me. I pulled the chair that Alice had occupied up next to the chair she was in.

"Baby… look-"

"I'm sorry." She said just above a whisper as she stared fiercely at Esme's diploma and medical license. "I honestly can't do this anymore." Her gaze slowly reached mine. "Charlie's right." Her hand went to her stomach and she took a deep breath, while my heart skipped a beat.

"Bella, what happened this morning won't happen again." Her eyes filled with tears and she swiped angrily at them.

"The Christmas tree incident was close. This was too fucking close though. If _one_ thing had been messed up this morning Ellie and Seth would be parentless. I can't do that to them. Or the rest of our family." My breath started to come in short bursts but she continued. "We have too much to lose. Kids, our house… our lives. It isn't worth it."

"Baby-"

"Let me finish." She said seriously, I tugged a hand through my hair and she grabbed my wrist interlocking our fingers. She stared into my eyes, "I think that you should drop the case, give it to Mike or Crowley. Because I'm not keeping the kids near all of this anymore. I didn't realize how… big this would all get."

"Wait." I held up a hand, "What the fuck do you mean you aren't keeping the kids near this anymore? Where are you going to take my kids?" I wasn't sure where this was going but I sure as hell didn't like it.

"_We_ would stay with Alice or Emmett… I don't know." I broke her gaze and hunched over in my chair, dropping her hand.

"You're leaving me." I clarified, she gasped. I knew everything from this morning would come crashing down on us. All of the jealousy and cheating talk from the lobby was just our avoidance of the issue at hand.

"What? No! Oh god, Baby no." She reached for my hand and I pinched the bridge of my nose instead. "I'm just leaving until this is cleared up, I wish you would just _drop_ the case though. I don't want to _not_ be with you. I don't have a choice."

"I said everything would be okay, Bella." I said before scrubbing my hands over my face.

"And then our fucking house was…. _Invaded_." She put her hand under my chin and turned my head so that my eyes met her large ones. The held a look that I hadn't seen on Bella in years. True and utter fear. "There was a gun, in my mouth and pointed at my _head_ Edward. There was a man outside of our daughter's bedroom with a _gun_. Things could have been so much worse. I thought I had lost you."

"What are you talking about?" I asked with a shake of my head.

"When the gun went off. I thought that was _you._ I thought someone had taken you from me from the kids." She closed her eyes and let her head fall back against the headrest. "I _can't _lose you, Edward."

"So how the hell does leaving me prove this?" I asked with a slight edge to my tone. I understood where she was coming from. Seeing that gun in her mouth would scar me for as long as I live. I didn't however understand her leaving me to show that she couldn't live without me.

_How the fuck did that make sense?_

"I'm _not leaving_ you." She huffed.

"Then what are you doing? Because leaving without me and taking my kids kind of sounds like _leaving me._" Even if it were probably the best decision in terms of the safety of my children and her.

"You're not listening." The door swung open and Esme cocked her hip.

"Look, I'm sorry about whatever is going on here. But I have another patient coming in soon. Bella, I'll see you in a month alright?" Bella nodded and swung her legs over the seat table thing before standing.

"Yeah uh sorry for monopolizing your office." Bella said politely before leaving the room, Esme gave me an accusing look as I exited after my wife. Bella stood behind Ellie helping her shrug on a coat as I helped Seth into his. Things were tense.

I didn't like it at all.

"Are you tired, pumpkin?" Bella asked Ellie right before she yawned and nodded. Like the two of us, Ellie had been up since the EMT's and police arrived, which was around three in the morning. Seth slowly started to nod off on my shoulder as we walked to the car and got the kids settled into booster and car seats alike.

They both fell asleep about five minutes into our hour long drive back home.

I gulped, "Did you want me to take you all somewhere?" I asked stoically, before turning onto the highway.

"Edward, stop."

"Stop what? You're already leaving. What's the point of me being unproductive?"

"Why are you being so…?" She narrowed her eyes and I shrugged.

"Well if I up and left you you'd feel pretty shitty wouldn't you?"

"You're being uncooperative!"

"Now how am I being uncooperative? I just offered to take you where ever you wanted to go and you got angry. Am I really the one being uncooperative?" I asked pointing a finger at my chest.

"You-" She huffed and turned up the heat before turning to check on the children, who were still sleeping. "You aren't making this easy." She murmured before shaking her head.

"Oh sorry did you want me to open the door for you too while you take my entire life with you? While you '_aren't _leaving'?" My voice rose and she glared at me, obviously loosing her cool.

"Shut the fuck up! Edward, you're being a real dick about all of this."

"Oh please." I muttered and she slapped my arm.

"I'm serious! You have a choice too! You don't want to consider what _you_ can do to make this work!" She said as she tried to speak over me.

"Shh…" Came a sleepy voice from behind us, my eyes met Ellie's in the rearview mirror and I frowned at the sad look that resonated before she drifted off again.

"I never said I wasn't going to do anything! You jumped to leaving-"

"I did not! You jackass, I told you-" I snorted as we attempted to speak over each other our voices getting louder with every word.

Her voice softened considerably, "Pull over." I rolled my eyes and took the next exit before parking in the empty parking lot of a Walmart. Bella turned and covered the kids up with a blanket that laid on the seat between them. She glared at me and stepped outside of the car. I checked to make sure the heat was on for the kids once more before stepping out as well.

"What?" I asked, leaning against my door as she rounded the side.

"What? You know exactly _what_! You don't have an idea about how hard this is for me-" She yelled.

"For you? This isn't exactly the _best_ time of my life-"

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" She pushed my chest and I fucking let her. Because what was I going to do?

"Me? Things get tough and you want to pack up? That's not the Bella that I married."

"Shit changes." She glared.

"Obviously."

"You _obviously_ don't understand how afraid, for _all_ of us, I was this morning. Edward, I'm pregnant-"

"What's new?"

"Just shut the fuck up and listen! I can't do this while I'm pregnant. When it gets serious like this I have to watch out for my family." She stepped toward me, before a tremor rocked through her body and her teeth shivered. My hand immediately twitched towards her wanting to make her feel more comfortable as a natural reaction. "You all are _my life_."

"I understand just fine. But you all are my life as well and you're taking that from me."

"If this hurts you so much why don't you just _drop the case_?" She asked quietly, looking up at me, from underneath her lashes.

"I have an obligation to Riley."

"So you can't complain." She growled.

"Why the fuck is that?"

"Because your priorities are obviously your job and then the kids and I." She whispered before pulling her coat tighter around her. She had rendered me speechless.

_I'm turning into my father._

I let out a sob like noise and sank down the car until I sat on the bumper. "You know you're my first priority, Bella."

"No…" She whimpered, sounding fucking broken. Not like my wife at all, I looked up to see her wiping tears rapidly. "Because if I wer-if _we_ were we wouldn't be having this issue." She dropped to her knees in front of me, despite the fact that the ground was covered in snow, and leaned on me, resting her head against mine.

"I love you. But I would rather take care of all of this by myself for a while, than have our impending deaths looming over my head." She said sadly, cupping my jaw. "I-we don't have to leave, Edward. This is all on you."

I grabbed her hands and brought them to my mouth, "Don't… don't leave me." My words sounded strangled and I felt like shit. "I am _not_ my father." I whispered before pressing a kiss to her knuckles. I stood and pulled her to her feet so that she didn't catch pneumonia.

"No, you aren't." Our eyes met and she wiped a lone tear from my cheek before pressing her lips to my own. Everything seemed alright, for those few seconds while we were together. Until she asked me the question I'd been dreading for the entire conversation.

"So what are you going to do?"

…TEC…

**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed.**

**Yeah it got kinda heavy on that last part of the chapter… They needed to have this conversation though. **

**I know that you guys don't like seeing them fight but… sometimes everything isn't perfect with marriages.**

**Okay *le sigh* what would you do if you were in Edwards situation?**

**I'm still tallying up the twins vs. one baby votes… And the girl vs. Boy votes and the names so I'll get back to that later! **

**Make sure you follow me on Twitter. You all will be the first to know about the Baby results!**

**I'm () Thatsnotsarcasm**

**Review! If we reach 655 I'll update tomorrow!**


	26. Chapter 25

_**Thanks to: MaryMary123, KManzie, christmastree, puss-is-in-boots, oukami-wolf, luv2dance, anon. reviewer, Cockerspanmom, videl gohan son, dowlingnana, totes. mah. gotes, DenisseSchmidt, muzaklover, dazzleglo, melissamary55 and dr. meow1234.**_

_**You ladies never fail to amaze me. Thank you so much!**_

_**I hope last Chapter didn't make anyone flop because the amount of reviews dropped by half… thanks to everyone who still reviewed! They keep me going!**_

_**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**_

…TEC…

"I think you're making the right choice, man." Emmett said as I sat in front of his desk, I just nodded silently and tugged a hand through my hair. "So we'll be moving Riley out of your place and into Mike's tomorrow," He shuffled some papers around on his desk, transferring the case and Newton practically vibrated with excitement in the chair next to me.

"You're a grown man. Calm the fuck down." I hissed under my breath, he smiled smugly at me.

"He, why are your panties in a bunch, Masen? Everybody's happy right? I get the glory and you keep your family. Win win right?" He smirked and I clenched the side of my seat. Emmett looked up at us and sent me a look that clearly told me to calm down.

"Everybody's happy." I agreed tersely.

"Alright, Masen. You're dismissed for now, I'll finish up the paper work with Newton and you spend some time with the family. You have a week off." I stood and we gave each other nods before I took off towards my car. Mike and I had basically just switched roles, I would have to work a few office hours and then Tanya and I would stay around his place during dark hours. My new phone vibrated spastically in my pocket once I reached the car. Bella had completely demolished the other one in the doctor's office.

"What the hell did you just do?" Tanya's voice screamed into the speaker.

"Transferred the cause to Newton." I said before sticking the key into the ignition of the car and pulling off.

"Why would you do that? You realize he'll get all of the credit for what you did, right?"

"I do."

"What is your issue?"

"I don't have an issue Tanya. There are just something's I have to do, alright? I'm still on the case; I have to interrogate the fuckers that broke into my house. And work nights with you at Mike's." I explained before tugging my hand through my hair. A text made the phone vibrate against my cheek.

_**Get lots of eggs. And cookies.**_

I sighed and pulled off of my track to head to the grocery store.

"So, what is this really about Edward? Is it Bella?" I rolled my eyes. Yes it was about Bella, and the kids, but that was none of her fucking business.

"Look I have to go Tanya. See you next week." I hung up and stood from the car heading in to the store and buying the things that Bella had requested. It'd been a week since Bella's doctor's appointment and our talk. Later that day she had packed small bags for the kids and herself and went to Emmett's. It hurt to see them walk out, but in the end it was the best thing, for her and the kids. Alec and I had the entire house to ourselves, and used the space well, almost never coming in contact with each other.

It was the loneliest week of my life.

And the quietest.

I missed my family. I missed Ellie calling Alice a whore and teaching Seth to do the same. I missed Bella's loud, smart mouth and hugging her as I slept. I missed Seth waking up in the middle of the night, even though he was too old to still not be sleeping, and his wet open mouthed kisses.

I saw them every day though, not as much as I would have liked to… Every night when Tanya and Mike showed up I headed up to Emmett's, so that I could see my family.

My phone buzzed as I went through the checkout line and I squinted at it.

_**And toelet paper.**_

Toelet paper?

I rolled my eyes and got a pack of Angel Soft, making my way through the line and heading down to my brother in laws. He didn't live too far making the nightly comute a short one. When I pulled into his drive way Ellie was on the porch bundled up next to a little boy around her age. I was going to have to ask Bella why she never had any girl friends.

"Daddy!" She squealed before running to me and wrapping her arms around my waist, she sneakily grabbed the bags and ran back to the porch.

"Ellie wait, watch out there are eggs in there."

"I know!" She giggled before darting through the house. I sighed and walked up to the porch, seeing Bella's cell phone lying next to where Ellie and her friend had been sitting. The screen had chocolate on it, I picked it up and pocketed it. I walked in to see Seth sitting in his play pen in front of the TV watching reruns of The Real Housewives of Orange County, while screaming at the fighting women. He stood and reached up for me when he was aware of my presence. I lifted him from the crib and he squealed with happiness upon seeing me and slobbered on my cheek as a kiss.

"Where's Mommy, Buddy?" I asked before pressing a kiss to his forehead.

"Mama wif Roe." My eyes widened at his answer, the question had been rhetorical due to my son's lack of vocabulary. Or assumed lack of vocabulary.

"Aren't you smart, kid!" I said before peppering his soft face with kissed.

"Hey, Edward." There was the telltale sign of someone flopping down onto the couch behind me. I turned to see Bella staring at the TV behind me. If it were possible she looked more beautiful than the last time I saw her. It could have been the fact that her cheek wasn't the size of my fist anymore. The dentist had fixed her tooth and cheek up quickly.

"Hey, Baby." I said quietly in response, Seth wrapped his little arms around my neck and hugged me tightly. "How do you feel?" Rosalie had told me that her morning sickness had gotten significantly worse as she progressed farther into her pregnancy. I sat next to her on the couch and threw my free arm over the back.

"How was your day?" I sat Seth in my lap and pulled her closer, laying a kiss on her temple.

"It was alright," She relaxed under my arm and blushed when I kissed her ear.

"I just transferred the papers for the case today." She actually looked at me when I spoke this time. I ducked my head so that I could press a kiss to her neck. She sighed and her breath ghosted down my cheek. I trailed my lips from the base of her neck up to her jaw before finally meeting her lips.

"So what's going to happen with Riley?" She asked before pulling away and taking Seth to his playpen. He went in easily every time, unlike Ellie who fought tooth and nail to stay out of the mesh prison. My boy was content to watch those housewives peacefully. I frowned and picked up the remote, flipping to football.

I leaned against the couch throwing my arms onto the back of it, "He's staying with Newton from now on. He'll be gone by tomorrow." She pushed my spread legs together and straddled me. "So you can come home… tonight."

She sniffled and pressed our mouths together, cupping my face. "I didn't want it to go this far…" She whispered against my lips.

"I'm sorry it did." She nodded and mouthed _me too_.

"I love you." My hands drifted down to cup her ass and pull her closer to me. Pressing out bodies flush together she gasped into my mouth. It had been the most affection that we'd shown towards each other since I had gotten back from Chicago. I was getting less action than Charlie. How'd I know this? He called the house phone asking me about the effects of Viagra two days ago. Why he called _me_, I'll never know.

"I love you too, Baby. I miss you." I whispered into her neck as I held her to me.

"I know," I furrowed my eyebrows and she chuckled. "I missed you more." There was the sound of clacking heels before Rose let out a gargling noise.

"Oh… I heard you in here- I uh- I didn't assume this was going to be a mushy moment." I looked up to see her backing out of the room. "I didn't know you two had those." Her voice faded away before she squeaked from another room and rushed back in. "You two…" She lifted Seth from his playpen and left us with, "Don't jizz on my couch."

"We have our own couch to jizz on." Bella called back before smiling brightly and kissing me.

"That means you're coming back today… right?" She bit her lip.

"Maybe we should wait until Riley is out of the house to come back." She leaned back on my lap.

"You'll be fine. Tanya and Mike are coming by again. And it will give you and Riley a chance to have one last girl talk."

"I don't have _girl talks_, Edward." She shook her head and stood pulling me up with her. "We'll come back though." I grinned triumphantly, "Did you see Ellie today?"

"She brought in the groceries for you."

"What groceries?" She asked before pulling her hair out of the pony tail and redoing it. I fisted my hands in her sweater and pulled her towards me, wrapping my arms around her again.

"The ones you texted-" I stopped, remembering Bella's phone on the porch and the _toelet paper_.

And Cookies.

_I should have known from the cookies._

Bella lifted an eyebrow at me, before throwing her arms over my shoulders. I rested my forehead against hers and pecked her lips. "Where is she?"

"Ellie? She's out back with um…" Her finger snapped next to my head and she bit her lip. "Jared! Yeah Jared and some of the other kids from the neighborhood." I pulled away grabbing her hand and dragging her to the window. My eyes widened at the sight. Toilet paper and white stuff, I'm assuming eggs, were strewn across the yard. The discarded cartons lay on the lawn haphazardly and wet gross looking children ran about in different states of disarray.

"This is why we don't let Ellie have friends." Bella grimaced and shook her head before pushing the opening half of the window to the side and ducking through it. She jumped into the bushes and landed on her feet before snatching one of the random kids out of the way of an egg.

"That was so _badass_ of you Bella." I said faking a lisp as she looked proud of slipping out of a first floor window.

"You're on clean up duty, Masen." She yelled back at me. I shook my head and went to the coat closet pulling my coat on and tucking it under my arm. After grabbing the appropriate supplies needed to clean eggs off of seven year olds I headed out side to see that the egg war was still going on. I shut the patio door and searched for Bella when her voice came from behind me.

"I thought you were going to stop this." I pointed at the kids still running around and handed her the coat.

"I had to pee." She smiled sweetly. Then she put her fingers to her mouth and let out a loud, unsweet whistle. Making me flinch and all of the chaos in the yard freeze. About ten pairs of little eyes looked up at us guiltily.

"Everybody drop your eggs." There was a simultaneous splat and I groaned, knowing I'd be the one cleaning that. Bella continued, "You will all clean this up and go home. Understand?" I looked around tuning Bella's terse voice out as I took in the fact that there was only one other little girl in Bella's audience.

_One __**butch**__ little girl._

"Where are all of the little girls?"

"We don't have time for you to go all pedo-bear, Edward. We need to clean this." Bella said before she back handed my chest. I flinched, I don't know if Bella lifts weights in her free time or what because _good god _she was heavy handed.

"Hey Mommy!" Ellie screamed before popping out of the window in the tree house that I didn't know Rose and Emmett had.

A little boy, the same one from the porch yelled, "Suck eggs!" Next to her and launched a large egg at the two of us. I took a quick step to the side and an egg his Bella in the shoulder, breaking and sending the contents into Bella's hair and the side of her face. Ellie's entire face dropped, her mouth falling into a shocked 'O' before her eyes widened in fright and she punched the little boy next to her.

She yelled. "Are you stupid? They'll probably make me sleep up here now!" Bella swiped the sticky substance from her face before glaring across the yard until she reached me. I held up my hands.

A sign clearly saying: _I didn't do anything._

"What was that? You just casually move out of the way and leave me to get nailed!" She growled, I held up a towel and she snatched it from me.

"Ellie! Get down here now!" Bella yelled up to the tree house, where Ellie laid into the little boy angrily with the occasional smack on the arm. Ellie glared at the boy before coming down from the tree house and standing guiltily at our feet.

"I'm sorry, Mommy." She looked at us from under her lashes and pouted a bit. "I love you."

"Love you too." Bella squatted in front of our daughter and hugged her. "I want all of this cleaned." She said in her ear.

"Okay here's how this is going to work." I said loudly, commanding the attention of all the little bastard children.

_I wouldn't say it to their faces!_

I pointed out two boys and butch-eena, "You three get cleaned up, by Mrs. Masen." I shifted all of the towels towards Bella. "The rest of you will be picking up toilet paper." I went to the hose and started spraying the eggs out of Rosalie's snow covered lawn. We had a nice little operation running, Bella cleaned hands and faces and whatever else, while I supervised. When the kids had picked up the toilet paper and egg shells up I would run over the newly cleaned grass with the hose, getting all egg remnants out of the grass. After the yard was egg and Angel Soft free I helped Bella clean kids.

Ellie sat in my lap as I wiped her hands and face, "What would make you do something like this? It's not even your house, Ellie."

"If anything you should be proud of me, Daddy." She smiled and patted my cheek with her clean hand.

"Why is that?"

"We made a good choice to play outside." She nodded and I blanched at the killer that would have been Rosalie if they'd done all of this in her house.

"You did. Why did you do this at all? That wasn't only a mental waste but a financial one too." Ellie slapped her hands against her thighs and looked put out.

"You know what Daddy? I'm seven! I don't know big words. Five letter max, Daddy. Five letter max." She shook her head incredulously and I couldn't help but to laugh.

"It was a waste of money. Don't do anything like this again. Ever." Her eyes widened and she hugged my neck.

"Am I in trouble?" She asked.

"Uh… _Yeah_." Bella said next to me as she cleaned off the little boy from the porch.

"Ellie?" She looked at me curiously.

"Why don't you have any friends that are girls?"

"I don't want to end up with an Alice." I snorted as we both surveyed the crowd of munchkins. "Am I going to be grounded?"

"Yes, ma'am." I nodded.

Ellie turned her large eyed gaze on me, "I love you, Daddy." I shook my head, "It was worth a try." She grimaced and there was a shriek from inside of the house. I turned to see my son standing, no… waddle running, towards the see through screen door, in nothing but his birthday suit. Rose stood behind him smiling happily.

"Look!" She yelled, Seth winced at the noise and fell onto his butt. Bella all but pushed the little egg launcher out of her lap before getting up to go to Seth, with tears in her eyes.

Bella wailed as she picked up Seth, "They grow up so fast!" She cried into his hair.

"You still have to put a diaper on him, Bella." Rose said holding one out, "He's not growing up _that_ fast."

I looked over to see one of Ellie's friends looking into his pants, "His is bigger than mines!" I smirked, in a non-pedophile way.

_It's a Masen thing._

…TEC…

**I hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**

**Just thought I'd lighten things up from last chapter… **

**Still working on the Baby details, hang in there!**

**Who would have thought it'd take Edward an entire week to pull his head out of his ass… *shakes head***

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	27. Chapter 26

**Thanks to: Sandra moore, dr. meow1234, MaryMary123, melissamary55, muzaklover, kelliekinz, DarkArrow62, DenisseSchmidt, Clickchick18, dazzleglo, SweetPJL, alc1002, luv2dance, KRmahal, Cockerspanmom, Yummu Dummy, Kgunter34, puss-is-in-boots, PrincessDripDrop, dowlingnana, totes. mah. gotes, KManzie, and rlwoods.**

**Thanks for your wonderful reviews!**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

"She did what?" And I thought the little girl was butch… her mother was larger than me.

"I'd just have her take a bath as soon as possible. You know for the egg and all..." The woman growled and slammed the door in my face.

"O...kay." I sighed and hurried down the steps, Bella met me on the side walk having just been to little Jared's house.

"She looked like she was going to eat you, Daddy." Ellie said from behind me her words were accompanied by small giggles.

"Alright who's next?" Bella asked ignoring Ellie and her badass friends. Two hands shot up and we sighed again taking one hand each and heading up to doorsteps.

I raised my hand to knock when the little boy next to me screamed, "Ma!" The door shot open and a statuesque woman appeared.

"What'd he do now?" She asked looking down at the little boy next to me.

"Egg and toilet paper fight. Don't be too hard on him though, it was my daughter and another little boy's idea." She pursed her lips before looking up and smiling at me.

"Where are my manners?" She tossed her long red hair over her shoulder and stuck out a hand. "Victoria Parker." I shook her hand and smiled.

"Edward Masen. Nice to meet you."

"Get in the house," she said to the kid next to me, he ducked past her and she leaned against the door frame. "Are you new to the neighborhood?"

"No, my brother lives down the street, just visiting." She looked at me head to toe. "Would you like to come in?" I squinted in confusion before a little hand grabbed the back of my shirt.

"No, sorry, we have to get all of the kids ready to head home." Bella said lightly gesturing to the crowd of seven behind us.

"Oh I'm sorry. I didn't realize..."

"Yeah, he tends to flirt when I'm not looking, it's okay." Victoria glared at me in disgust, despite the fact that my wife's tone was anything but serious.

_I think._

"I wasn't flirting," I turned and gave my wife bedroom eyes, "I'm just extremely charming." I smirked at her and she rolled her eyes and turned to Victoria.

"You'll want to get your kid clean as soon as possible because of the egg." Victoria nodded before shaking her head at me once more and bidding my wife goodnight.

I snatched up Bella's hand, entwining our fingers, before kissing her ring finger.

She tossed me a fake smile, "Nice try. You aren't that charming." I smirked, grabbing her left hand in mine and pulling her across my body, holding her to my chest. I pressed a kiss to her neck and wrapped my arms around her. I put my nose to her neck right before my gag reflex was triggered.

"I was hit with the egg too, Mr. Charming." She said flatly. I wrinkled my nose at the stench emitting from her neck and shrunk away.

"I've got my eye on you, Masen." She said pulling away quickly and grabbing up the next kid, and nudging two towards me. There were so many kids in that fight, I couldn't believe they all lived on the same street.

We finished off delivering children and the egg warnings that came with them. When we finally reached the house again Emmett was crying over his lawn.

"Emmett the snow will come back." Rose comforted from her spot on the arm of the sofa next to him. Bella adjusted her legs so that it crossed over my thigh and rested between my legs. I pulled the blanket we were under, up a bit so that we could inconspicuously rest my hand on her ass, and knead it. We had been playfully working each other up since Rose dropped off our blanket.

Ellie sauntered in slowly, rubbing her eyes. "Can we leave?" Bella and I righted ourselves before Ellie draped herself over the blanket on our laps.

"Yeah, pumpkin." Bella tossed the blanket onto me and stood, swooping Ellie's sleepy form into her arms. "We'll see you guys later." I said standing as well.

Rose waved and Emmett dropped his head into her lap dramatically. I picked up Seth before breaking down his playpen. Rose saw us to the door and passed me Seth's diaper bag before leaving us with a tip.

"Seth only walks when he's naked. In case you were wondering… You guys should let his true streaker out." She winked and Seth jumped in my arms with a giggle.

"Bye, Rose." I smirked before hugging her and kissing her cheek. Emmett finally came to his senses and bid us all good-bye. Giving Ellie a terse handshake. She didn't seem to care though as she let her head lethargically fall against my side soon after. I passed Seth to Bella before hoisting Ellie into my arms.

"See you guys later." Bella waved before we left the house.

"Daddy?" Ellie whispered in my ear.

"Hmm?"

"You never brought me cookies from Chicago."

"We'll get some on the way home, okay?" She nodded and pressed a kiss to my cheek. She was asleep as soon as I buckled her in, unlike her little brother, who was still hyped up about walking for the first time. I kissed his head before laughing.

Bella turned in her seat with a big smile, her enthusiasm matching his. "Next time we're going to teach you how to walk with your clothes on, yeah?"

His head bobbed, "Yah!" Bella clapped happily and faced forward again. I smiled just happy to be with my family. I jumped into the car and took off towards the grocery store.

"Why are we here?"

"I have to get Ellie cookies." I said stepping out of the car, she nodded and laid her head on the head rest. I quickly got the cookies and was on my way to the register when I got a text from Bella.

_**Get pickles too, please.**_

I turned and got the jar of pickles before my phone buzzed once more.

_**And condoms**_ _**;)**_

"_Hell _yeah." I groaned before biting my lip. I fucking skipped to the next aisle, getting hard just at the thought of my sexy wife sprawled out on the bed in front of me. I half ran out to the car after making my purchase, jumping into the car and kissing the hell out of Bella.

When I pulled away she rolled her eyes, "Ew…" Seth shrieked from behind my seat, before giggling. I sped home; literally, I had to be going twenty miles over the speed limit when Bella slammed her hand onto my arm.

"Slow the fuck down!" She half screamed, her hand tightening on my bicep. I flexed… you know _nonchalantly_, wiggling my eyebrows at her. She glared and I let up on the petal a bit. We made it to the house in record time, of course Bella was clutching the bottom of her seat the entire time but…

_Hey. We're all okay._

We both got a kid and a bag before heading inside, Riley was on the couch, flanked by both Tanya and Mike. I sighed deeply and set the bags in the kitchen before deciding to address the bombardment Riley was receiving, after putting Ellie to bed. As soon as I left Ellie's room the front of my shirt was grabbed and I was thrown into my room.

"Bella?" She pushed me farther into the room and jumped on me, wrapping her legs around my waist and fused her lips with mine.

"Expecting someone else?" She kinked an eyebrow, I rolled my eyes and carried her to the bed, forgetting Riley easily. Bella pulled her shirt over her head roughly and tossing it behind her, taking mine next. My hands trailed up her naked torso, cupping her breast as I kissed up her neck.

Bella's hands started to fumble for my belt when a crash sounded, echoing through the baby monitor.

"Oh shit." Bella flipped us so that she sat on top of me and leaned over; I smiled and leaned up taking one of her nipples in my mouth, sucking lightly on it. Her hips rolled on my abs before she pulled away.

"Stop, Baby. Something's wrong." She said before finally reaching her shirt and whipping it over her head.

"Wait. I'm sure Seth just threw a toy on the ground, or something. He can't get out of the crib- railings to high." I flipped her and lifted her leg, grinding into her core, feeling her heat against me. Her head fell back and there was another crash farther from the monitor.

Her eyes widened and she slapped at my chest before turning us again, "Edward. The baby monitor isn't in Seth's room. It's downstairs." She swung her leg off of me before standing and grabbing a gun. I stood behind her, figures something like this would fucking happen the first night their back. I grabbed my own gun and followed her out of the room.

"Bella, maybe you should go back into the room." I whispered not wanting a repeat of last week. The living room was empty, all the lights still turned on and the chair Riley had occupied was flipped onto its back.

She turned towards me and shook her head, "I'll get Seth and Ellie." She said quietly before going into our youngest's room. I crept down the steps and saw Tanya lying across the bottom step.

"The fuck? Tanya?" I lifted her gently and patted her face, but she was out like a light. I went to the front door and pulled it open. Mikes car wasn't in the driveway. I moved Tanya onto one of the couches before rushing up the steps towards Ellie's room.

Bella sat next to Ellie on her bed, rocking Seth, while whispering to her.

"Daddy?" Ellie whispered groggily, Seth sat up and muttered his own, "Dah-ey…" and reached out to me.

"I have to go." I said before kissing all of them and heading into my bedroom, I pulled a clean shirt over my head, seeing as Bella was wearing my other one. I was in the midst of pulling on my jacket and hooking a gun into my holster when Bella appeared in the doorway.

"What happened? I saw Tanya…" Her eyes filled with tears and I immediately regretted bringing her and the kids back here, while she was pregnant. While Riley was still here and in danger.

I passed her in the doorway, pressing a kiss to her lips. "I have to go, I'm sorry, Baby. I love you." I swiped a tear from her cheek and kissed her again.

"I love you too," She grabbed my arm and I stopped. "Where's Alec?"

"Bella…" I honestly didn't want to upset her. She expected girl talk, I really didn't want to ruin that by telling her her girl-talk buddy was kidnapped.

_Okay, I agree. _

_I highly doubt she expected girl talk._

"Just answer my question." She said sternly as I went down the steps.

"I think Mike has him." She gasped.

"Fucking hell. You want me to come with you?" She asked pulling out her gun.

"No, baby, stay with the kids." She sighed and nodded, heading back towards Ellie's room.

"Be safe."

"Always am." She scoffed and disappeared. "Well…"

"Except for the Chloroform yeah, I know." She called from the hall. I smirked and shook my head before running to the car.

…TEC…

Hope you enjoyed and/or laughed.

They just can't catch a break can they… *shakes head*

Review! If we reach 690 I'll update tomorrow. 700 and I'll throw in a POV from Tanya, Mike or Alec about what happened while Edward and Bella weren't present!

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	28. Chapter 27

**Thanks to: Music ADD, melissamary55, kelliekinz, Melnaugh, Inserthilariousnamehere, Sandra moore, MaryMary123, dr. meow1234, Kayla, rlwoods, KRmahal, alc1002, SweetPJL, Cockerspanmom, Clickchick18, totes. Mah. Gotes, DenisseSchmidt, shanese, dazzleglo, KManzie, too lazy to login, dowlingnana, luv2dance, Yummy Dummy, muzaklover, and Emeraldeyecane.**

**You all are honestly too funny. For every person worried about Riley/Alec the were seven that were upset about the cock block. Oh ladies :D**

**I know I'm like two days late with the update… Sorry D:**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

"Newton?"

"That's what I said isn't it?" I grumbled, narrowly missing Jessie's mail box as I sped down my drive way.

"What a fuck." There was a click on Jaspers end and I nodded in agreement. "How long?"

"About five minutes, be ready." He mhmm'ed and I laid on the gas, weaving my way through the darkened streets towards the Whitlock household. When I pulled up Jasper darted out of the house, tucking his gun into his waistband. I reached into the back seat and threw him a bullet proof vest identical to mine.

"Why the fuck won't it stay…?" He whispered before sliding in and slamming the door, he jammed the gun into his pants again and watched as it fell. I rolled my eyes and took off. Alice waved from the door clutching a short robe closed.

"The button of your pants is undone… _genius._" He sighed and fastened the button on his pants. As we went down his street one of the lamps caught onto a nasty looking red scratch on his neck. "What happened to your neck?"

"The wife likes to get _freaky_." He bounced his eyebrows and smirked before pulling his seatbelt across his chest. "Thanks to a _certain someone_ we were interrupted." One eyebrow dropped as he glared accusingly at me.

"I know exactly how you feel. But I'm not the one getting kidnapped."

"True." He concurred with the tilt of his head. "So… where the fuck are we going?" I pulled the GPS tracking system out of the glove compartment and dropped it in his lap.

"Plug in P-A-1005. From P-A-1013." He nodded and hummed along with something in his head.

"Nada, man."

_Fucker turned off his GPS._

"Try P-A-1005-S." There was no way he didn't know that the GPS was always trackable.

"Okay, call me stupid… But I have never seen anything like this in my life. What are the numbers for?"

"P.A. is for Port Angeles and the number is the number of the GPS in the cars we drive. Wait why the hell don't you know about the GPS?"

"The partner said it wasn't important. I mean how often do you have to chase down corrupt cops?" He asked with a smirk before tapping on the screen of the small device. "I'm _so_ hype, man." His leg shook back and forth shaking the cab of the car.

"What-why?"

"I don't get to do this kind of stuff, I'm jazzed." He slapped my arm before laughing. "Get it? Jazz? Like what Ali calls me? It's kind of like a play on words"

"Shut up, Jasper." I ordered before a woman's voice came over the speaker rattling off an address and leading me towards Newton's car. He wasn't far from us, but we were heading in the opposite direction, I smoothly made a U-turn and started towards a sketchy motel.

"Oh man… Nothing good ever happens at places like these." Jasper grinned, I skidded into the parking space next to Mike's car and took off towards the building, barely pulling out my keys.

"I'm pumped, dude. Pumped!" His childlike enthusiasm was…

_Soon going to earn him a punch in the jaw._

"I've never used a gun before." That made me stop in my tracks, I slowly turned to look at him and he smirked.

"Just kidding, just kidding." He walked silently behind me for a while. "I'm feelin' sexy and fr_ee-ee-ee_." He sang softly, I turned incredulously.

"Will you _shut up_?"

"Domino, man. That song would be such a great theme song for us right now. That Jessie J…. Soundtrack of my life, Babe." I didn't think he was talking to me anymore because he looked up to the sky. Giving me the opportune shot at his shoulder.

"How is that at all theme song-y?" I asked, before snapping out of the stupidity that my friend seemed to be exuding at the moment.

He shrugged and switched topics, "So what? Are we just going to wait for them to make a noise… or…?" I palmed my face before realizing that I didn't have a fucking clue about what we were going to do.

"I don't know…"

"How about we get a universal key." He said as we approached a small door that said lobby and check-in on the front. "Then we can check every room. Lobby and Check-in. Hmm?" He seemed to look over the door for a while before muttering, "Can't be much of a lobby." I had to agree the door looked smaller than the one leading to my closet.

I pushed the door open to reveal darkness, "Get the lights, Jazz." He hit the switch, illuminating the small room harshly; I winced but moved to search for a universal key.

"You don't even have to purchase a fucking room her-" Jasper started as he examined the wall of room keys. At the top was a key like the others except it had the words '**All Roomes**' written on a large key chain. "Which would explain why they choose to come here!" He slapped his forehead and smiled before picking up the universal key.

"These people must not be too bright… rooms doesn't have an 'e' anywhere in it." He sighed and clenched it in his hand. "This is the same people who leave their room of room keys unlocked and unattended though..." I nodded and we left the room making our way around the small motel. It was in a U shape and couldn't have twenty rooms top. After door five… or ten I glanced behind me boredly and notices a door that had obviously been kicked open.

"Oh… woops." Jasper whispered before the distinct sounds of moaning reached my ears. I turned towards the door and was met with a scream.

"Unless you wanna refund my twenty for this bitch I suggest you close the door, man." A deep grumbly voice growled, Jaspers eyes widened and I stepped forward.

"Unless you want five to ten _years_ I suggest you leave." I said coolly while flashing my badge. The hooker screamed again and they both shot out of the bed, I looked away as she flounced around in her birthday suit. Being the gentleman I am and yanked on Jaspers arm, because that jackass just _watched_.

"Let's go, Jasper." I dragged him towards the door that had been kicked in, wondering why I hadn't noticed the door before.

"Dude, aren't you worried?"

"If I weren't we probably wouldn't be searching Motels." I rolled my eyes.

"I mean… Bella's sleeping around for _money_, man!" He slapped my back and I saw red, turning towards him.

"You think that's funny, you prick?" I pushed him and he laughed.

"I'm joking! Joking! That wasn't Bella!"

"I think I'd know if that were my wife." I glared and he smirked before passing me and making his way into the small room.

"Ah, the fresh stench of STD's in the morning." I slapped the back of his head and moved around the room.

"Who's there?" A deep voice that wasn't Newton's bellowed from the bathroom. "We have guns!"

"Watcha doin? Shooting a movie?" I swear I almost broke Jaspers jaw. I held myself back though. Then a shot fired, it hit the light on the opposing wall. "What's this? A game of chicken?" Jasper snorted.

"Stop. Talking." I growled to him, my heart thudded in my chest as we neared the bathroom. "Hey, man!" I yelled towards the bathroom. "You're partner called me. Don't go shootin'," I looked to Jasper ad rolled my eyes before shouting. "Bro!" Jasper smirked and we walked a little bit closer. There was obviously three men in the bathroom, besides Alec, if he were in there. I heard no signs of him.

"I didn't know other people were coming." I tucked my gun into my waistband and closed the distance between the door and myself, with Jasper on my tail. The bathroom door had a bullet hole through it. These punks obviously weren't as tough as they thought they were. They couldn't even open the bathroom door to shoot at us.

"They aren't man." There was a dull thud before someone slammed into the bathroom door.

"Fucking punk. You tipped off the feds didn't you?" They must have slammed Mike's head against the door because there was a dull thud that was way too high for someone to reach without standing.

"I swear I didn't. I _swear._" Jasper looked cautiously at us before knocking twice on the door. Another shot wailed through the wall, barely missing the side of my waist. I jumped back in shock as did Jasper and Mike screamed. Another shot sailed through the door, higher this time and Mike's screams silenced.

"You killed him, man!" The second voice shrieked.

"He fucked with my money." The first one grumbled, I shook my head and sent up a quick prayer. I backed up slightly and aimed my gun low at the thin door, low enough that any shot I fired would either miss my target or hit the man in the lower part of his body. I cocked it silently and shot off my own bullet. An agonized groan emitted from the bathroom, it was the deep voiced man. I looked to Jasper who nodded at me, before moving to the side, and letting him kick the door open.

_Who the fuck makes a wooden door so thin that you can kick through it and not break it?_

Jaspers eyes widened before he yanked his foot right back out. He took another shot right under the lock, which he should have done in the first place, and the entire lock just fell inward. Jasper nudged the door open a bit more and I went in first, holding my gun up ready for fire. I entered the bathroom, the room was small, tiny in fact, and the fluorescent lights made all three occupants look sickly and dirty. Mike lay on the floor, curled in on himself. While a man on the toilet clutched at his abdomen, the man I had shot and injured. A third, much skinnier form sat on the counter, curled into fetal position.

I whispered, the boy gulped and held up his hands.

"Drop it, dick." Jasper greeted the other man. I looked over to see the same fucker that broke into my home, Andrew Patino, drop a gun. The same man who had pressed his big ass against my wife's chest. My entire being was fueled with fury as the sight hit me like an oncoming truck. I shook myself out of it though. A completely serious Jasper pushed past me, grabbing a pair of hand cuffs from who knows where and cuffing the ass on the toilet.

I turned to man number two once more and he held out his hands willingly. I slapped some cuffs on his wrists and pulled him up into a standing position. He was a bit taller than me but much skinnier, which had ultimately given me the upper hand when we fought in my house. He still had bruises covering his form from his tumble down the steps.

"Remember me?" I asked once he was standing, he stared me down stoically and I raised an eyebrow before shaking my head and pushing him towards Jasper. I then turned and stepped toward the larger man.

I sighed as the barrel of my gun met a familiar and unwelcome sight. "Andrew?" The larger man ignored me, turning to stare at the shower curtain instead.

"So… you think you can see pretty well in the dark?" Andrew ignored me again and I sighed. "Let's say you _do_ see pretty well in the dark. Well even if you _couldn't_ see too well in the dark you would know the difference between a man and a woman, anywhere. Am I correct?" I left the question open and looked to Jasper who was eying me warily. I leaned into the big guys face and he shrugged before nodding.

"So, you knew that you were sitting on a _woman_ when you were in my house?" The big guy looked me in the eyes with confusion for a minute before recognizing my face. "You realized that you had _punched _a _woman_ in the face?" I leaned closer, and he leaned away. "You see it would have been perfectly okay if you had hit _me_ in the face. I mean your partner did. He was thrown down a flight of steps. But-" I turned toward the tall kid. "No harm no foul, right?" The kid rolled his eyes, "Except for the whole plummeting down a staircase but whatever. He'll get over it."

"I'm calling Charlie while you get these guys- wait… where's Riley?" The tall guy made a run for it and I simply stuck a foot out and sent him to the floor.

_Dumbass._

Jasper cuffed his feet as well and I went back to my speech, "You hit a _woman._ Not any woman, but my fucking wife." The big guy rolled his eyes and I pulled out my gun and smashed the butt into his cheek, there was a crunch and he coughed with tears in his eyes before spitting out a tooth. "Don't be such a fucking _punk. _But I think everyone has room for improvement, Andrew, so I'll have mercy on you. So instead of taking two teeth, like you did to my wife, I'll go easy on you and settle for one tooth." He wailed again and I turned, before looking over my shoulder. "Well, a tooth and a bullet to the stomach. Same difference." He cried out in pain and sat up straight, well aware of the bullet in his abdomen. I reached down towards Mike's body and shook my head, before snatching his keys. He had completely brought this on himself.

I picked the skinny guy up and shoved him against the wall, confiscating his guns and whatnots, tossing them towards Jasper, after the appropriate safety precautions of course. "You're just lucky my wife didn't show up. She's a hell of a lot scarier than me, especially when not taken by surprise." I smirked and led the skinny guy out towards Mike's car, he had the separator and Jasper would have to drive it back but it was safer than squeezing the guys in between the car seats that took residence in my back seat. I shoved him into the car and locked it, before turning and heading back into the Motel room.

Jasper thrust Andrew towards me, his bleeding mouth stuffed with cotton. I led him out to the car as well, shoving him in when three other cop cars skidded into the scene. Charlie jumped out and ran towards me.

"Newton did all of this? What the hell was he thinking?" Emmett jogged up next to him shaking his head.

"Jasper didn't tell you?" I searched their eyes. "Newton's dead. Shot twice." I pointed at my head and stomach and both of their heads dropped.

"Fucking kid. Never-" Charlie sighed and pulled himself together before passing me and heading toward the crime scene.

"Well Masen, you want to head out to find Riley with me?" I looked at Emmett but a moving figure caught my eye behind him. I focused on the moving figures and saw the prostitute and her buyer running out of their motel room. I shook my head and let them go.

"Where do we look?" Jasper approached us and I shrugged.

"Up there." Emmett looked over our heads and jerked his chin towards a large wooded hill. I pushed my fingers through my hair and sighed. Last time I went into the woods I left the area unconscious. "Scared Bella won't be able to save you this time, Masen?" Emmett joked before kiddingly throwing his big ass arm into my ribs.

"No. I'm ready." Emmett nodded and turned.

"Wait." He turned back to us, "Where is Tanya?"

"Back at the house, Mike knocked her out before taking Alec." He nodded and called Crowley and Samson over to accompany us on our trip up.

"You're sure he's up there?"

"That's what they said." He jerked a head towards Mike's car where Andrew and his friend were talking to some cops.

"Let's head up then." I said, the men around me nodded and we started to make our way up the large hill. About halfway up the hill we decided to spread out a bit, not very far, we still had to be able to see at least another person which wasn't all that hard seeing as it was the middle of winter and most leaves on the trees were brown and covering our shoes at the moment.

"Oh fuck." Emmett groaned, I whipped towards him as he pulled out his cell phone. "My sister wanted me to call when everything was okay." He smirked at me and I sighed blushing lightly. Emmett tapped around on his phone before holding it to his ear. We continued our journey up the hill as the phone rang, though we were a bit closer to each other now.

"Bells?" He paused and his face softened a bit. "He's fine-" She spoke some more and then Emmett sighed, "Yeah I'll give him the phone. Just so you know I'm okay too! In case you were wondering." He trailed off holding out the phone towards me. I picked it up and held it to my ear.

"_You just got there, and you sound fine so I just assumed you'd be alright, Emmett. Man up._" I chuckled at her and she spoke again. "_Edward?_"

"Hi, Baby."

"_How are you? Are you hurt? More Chloroform? You were gone for a pretty long time, Baby. I love you. Who was is? What happened to Mike? What about Riley? Is he there? Is he okay too?_" I sighed and lifted an eyebrow waiting for her to stop.

"I'm fine. If I were chloroformed again I wouldn't be talking to you. Are we never going to let that go? I, uh," I looked up at Emmett and lowered my voice. "love you too." Emmett turned toward me and pouted, holding his hands over his chest and batting his eye lashes at me. Awe's echoed through the woods from my separate coworkers and I groaned. "Mike is dead. We're still looking for Riley…" She sighed sadly and I wished I was there to hold her, to comfort her. Even if she would have batted my hands away.

"Alright… well good luck. Love you." I winced at the fact that she was going to get me beat up at the end of this trip by making me say it again.

"You too, Baby-" She cleared her throat and Emmett looked at me expectantly. "Love you too." I could practically hear her happiness and Emmett made that fucking face and the accompanying awe. "Bye." I hung up and handed the phone back to my brother in law.

"Hey! Get over here!" Crowley hissed from his area, we all jogged towards him seeing what he was pointing to. It was a shoe. A grown man's shoe which was covered in blood.

"Fu-" Emmett started loudly; I covered his mouth when I heard muffled voice. I held my finger to my own lips and moved towards the sound, the guys following behind me.

"If you would just give me the fucking account code, I could _easily_ let you go, for a few millions of course. But you'd be on your way. They are closing in on us. Hurry up, son." A familiarly deep and wise sounding voice commanded. I stiffened at the sound and turned to Emmett.

He whispered, "It's the return of Papa Masen-McCarty."

…TEC…

**Hope you enjoyed! (or laughed in the first part)**

**Not really the ass kicking you were expecting? There is more to come though ladies! **

**Ugh I was hoping to get this all over with this chapter (the Alec situation not the entire story) these EPOV's are killing me… So the last one will be next chapter hopefully.**

**Lets aim for 725? Yes!**

**In case you were wondering (which I'm sure you weren't) you all have broken all records I've set with my stories! Much love goes out! Thank you so much!**

**In the end my goal is 1K so help me out? **

**You all are the best!**


	29. Chapter 28

**Thanks to: dr. meow1234, m, DenisseSchmidt, kelliekinz, Cockerspanmom, Kgunter34, MaryMary123, Yummy Dummy, totes. mah. gotes, Sandra moore, rlwoods, SweetPJL, alc1002. Thank you for your reviews! They mean a lot to me!**

**I hope I didn't lose you all! There was a large decrease of reviews… **

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

"Isn't it kind of uncanny that the people you're supposed to protect always end up in the woods?" Jasper asked with a slight chuckle. We all turned and looked at him with annoyance.

Emmett rolled his eyes, "All right boys; let's get this shit over with, shall we?" I nodded and the five of us drew our weapons. We all spread out around the area before closing in simultaneously. There were four other men in the clearing besides Robert and Alec, all of them at least Emmett's size. The more I took in the men; I realized that none of them were on the Patino pay roll. Most of them being in high ranks in the Volturi business.

Riley's eyes met mine and they widened. He looked horrible, his face bruised and bleeding heavily. They had him tied to a tree, high enough that his feet weren't touching the ground. When we had approached the men from behind and attempted to Mirandize them we got a reaction that Federal agents don't usually get, taking the others by surprise. Two of the small men dropped to their knees in surrender, while the other two came at Emmett and me.

One of the larger ones approached me as Whitlock, and Crowley went to Alec, untying him. Samson was taking care of McCarty, while Emmett went head on with the other large guy.

"Hey man, this would all be a lot easier if you just let me cuff you." I said easily to the large guy closing in on me. He pulled out a gun on me, holding it straight at my chest; I shook my head and rolled my eyes before swinging my leg up and kicking the small weapon out of his hand. I couldn't get over how incompetent some of these goons were. "I see we aren't going to be civilized about this whole ordeal."

"You're so cocky aren't you?" The man asked in an unexpectedly high pitched voice, he sounded slightly crazed. "I can take you out and then all of your friends and still get my money in the end." He smirked and swung at me sloppily. I sighed and caught him by the arm, twisting it behind his back and forcing him to the ground. He did kick and writhe as little bit, his weight forcing me off of him. We both scrambled to our feet and circled around each other for a while; he threw a punch at me after a while, hitting me square in the jaw.

I didn't let that deter me though as I threw a punch, putting all of my force behind it, sending the man stumbling into a nearby tree. I then laid into his stomach, before letting his limp body fall to the ground. I flipped him onto his stomach and kneeled on his back, cuffing him. I did have a bit of trouble lugging his big ass up into a standing position though. Emmett had already cuffed the other guy, who didn't seem to put up as much as a fight as my guy. I pushed my guy towards Emmett, so that they didn't try and make an escape while I checked on Alec.

"Where am I?" He asked Jasper, I wrinkled my nose in confusion. His accent was stronger than it had been when we first met him, which was strange because for the short time he was with us his accent, the little bit he did have, seemed to fade away.

"Alec? Are you all right?" I put a hand on his shoulder and he shied away. He looked around the wooded area seemingly unseeing. I turned to Jasper, "What's wrong with him?" Jasper shrugged and Samson spoke up.

He tapped Alec's shoulder, "What's your name, son?" He asked gruffly.

"…I don't know." He said sadly after a moment of thought. I bit the inside of my cheek in confusion.

"You don't remember me?" I pointed at my chest and he shook his head again. Jasper dug in his back pocket and pulled out his wallet flipping it open and holding it to Alec's face.

"What about her?" He tapped at the wallet and I peeked over the top of it.

"Why the hell do you have a picture of Bella?" Sure it was an older picture, but… I mean _I _don't even have a picture of her in my wallet.

"Hey bro, we were friends first! Alice and I are in the picture too." I narrowed my eyes but dropped it.

"Post-Traumatic Amnesia." Samson said as he probed around Alec's head. "Mike must have knocked him out to get here. He has memory loss from the blow to the head."

"_Fuck._" I hissed under my breath. This is just what we needed at this point in the case. Don't get me wrong, I'm worried for him. But this fucks up a lot.

"Let's head back down guys!" Emmett yelled from between the cuffed giants. I stood and helped Riley up, before shooting a text to the Chief so that he could call an ambulance for Alec.

We started down the hill each of us pushing one of the cuffed assailants down the large hill in front of us. Jasper and I helped Alec down the hill, as we were in charge of making sure the smaller guys got to the cop cars. They weren't putting up any kind of fight and were very manageable. Alec however was very reluctant to come down with a group of people he didn't know. We had to simultaneously wrestle and support him; due to how weak he was, from the constant beatings he had been receiving, as we went through the sea of trees.

"Who are you people?" He growled, thrashing in our arms.

"Alec. Calm down. You're safe, we're police officers." He smirked and tried to pull away again.

"Funny, that's what those guys said." He said nodding at the men cuffed in front of us.

"And they're in handcuffs." I rolled my eyes. I wasn't sure I liked this _new_ Alec very much. He was certainly more outgoing and bold than before… He would have never fought against anyone before, much less Jasper or I. He glared and calmed down a bit as we finally made it to the base of the hill.

Our little group was swarmed with cops as they hauled off the five criminals. The chief and Emmett met with Jasper and I in the hotel room where we found Mike and his goons. They were currently taking pictures of his body and everything as the chief briefed us.

_Well… as the chief growled and foamed at the mouth… at us. _

"Why the hell isn't Tanya here?" Charlie boomed as he paced the floor.

"She's still at the house; she was knocked unconscious when Alec was kidnapped." Jasper filled in, the chief shook his head probably worried about the incompetence of his employees.

"Aren't you people supposed to be cops? Federal agents at that!" He growled.

_Told you._

I pinched the bridge of my nose, "Did we not just catch all of the suspects in the _act_? I thought we were doing pretty well."

"If you did well we wouldn't have an amnesia victim, an unconscious agent and a dead coworker on our hands." He said leaning down so he was looking me in the eye.

"Isn't the ability of _your_ agents on you then, chief? It's really not my fault that one got himself killed. Or that the other was taken out. I can't help that shit." I countered fiercely. He was always on my ass. Why? Hell if I knew.

_Well it could be that I'm fucking his daughter…_

_But I digress._

"Masen, shut the _hell_ up. Don't forget I'm the one who signs your checks." His eye twitched and Jasper leaned in towards me.

"Is he really?" I turned toward him and shrugged.

"I… don't know." Jasper nodded and sat upright when we received a harsh glare from the chief.

"Agh…" He huffed and put his hands on his hips. "You two get the fuck out of my sight. We're done for now. I'll call if I need you." He growled before heading into the bathroom. I slowly stood from the bed and made my way to the car, narrowly dodging all of the chaos outside. Once inside my car I reveled at the silence that I hadn't had since around eleven o'clock last night, when I picked up Jasper. I sighed contently at the realization that once we pieced together the connection of the men who broke into my house, the Christmas tree shooters, Patino, Mike and my biological father the case would be over. I would be free to have a regular life again.

I smiled and plugged the key into the ignition before my passenger door shot open. "What the hell, bro? You just gonna leave me here?" Jasper sat in the passenger seat of the car, looking put out. And that's exactly what I wanted to do.

_Put him the fuck out._

"Of course not, Jazz. You know I wouldn't leave without you." I said sarcastically, the need for sleep hit me like a fucking brick when that door opened. I wasn't really in the mood for his whiny shit at the moment. My temper quickly shot through the roof, my recent contentment flew out of the window. I still had to make connections, go on trial, face the chief again… This case felt like it would never end.

He shifted in his seat so that he looked at my profile, "McCarty and Newton. How the hell do you think that happened?"

"Newton always was a fuck up. He probably was in it for money… I don't know how Patino was involved."

"How did you even get assigned this case, bro? Patino Jr. was in charge of the Volturi foreign affairs. Read the files man. They have some vital shit." I rolled my eyes and nodded pressing down on the gas a bit.

"You wanna stop somewhere? Let's go to Mickey D's before we go home." He looked at his watch and groaned. "Dude you realize we've been here for, like, six hours?" He asked in shock.

_Which means I'm running on absolutely no sleep. _

_Shut up._

"Yes, Jasper." I gritted and clenched my jaw.

"Good thing McDonalds is twenty four seven right?" He grinned before leaning back against the headrest. I sighed deeply and sped out of the parking lot. I was pushing seventy in a twenty five zone when Jazz's eyes shot open and he gripped onto the bottom of his seat, pulling his seatbelt on with one hand.

"Slow the hell down!" He yelled as the ratty buildings whizzed past us. He stared at me when I didn't let up on the petal. "Edward, I think the last thing either of us needs today is for you to kill us." He sighed and I pulled my foot up just a bit so we were down to about sixty miles per hour. "Pull over, Edward." I ignored him. If I pulled over we would debate about whom would drive, then he would end up driving, forcing us to switch seats. Then he would go to McDonalds waste a fuck load of time ordering and flirting with a drag queen at the drive thru window and then he would pull over and flip the fuck out when he realized that he'd been flirting with a dude, only after I told him she was in fact a he. Then he'd drive himself home and we'd have to switch seats again and he would spout off some shit about my not being able to drive and he'd call Bella to come and get me and I'd have to sit on his fucking couch waiting, while he returned to his earlier activity of fucking Alice, while I was in earshot.

_Which was a waste of time that I could use sleeping._

"Edward, pull over I'm driving." He said unbuckling his seat belt.

"The hell you are." Jasper punched my arm and I laid off of the petal a bit more. "Why the hell did you think it'd be a good fucking idea to punch the fuck out of my arm while I'm driving a _fucking car?_" I growled at him, I looked at the dial in front of me to see I had slowed to the proper speed limit.

"Woah Eddie. Watch your mouth. How would Ellie feel if she heard that?"

"She'd feel like the richest kid in the fucking world."

"Dude, what's wrong with you?"

"I haven't slept since the night before last. I just got fucking berated for solving a case. And you are _never quiet._" I border line moaned before pulling into the McDonalds drive thru.

"Oh that sucks, bro. Nice use of berated…" He said easily. "Lucky for me I don't get tired. I'm like my own built in red bull generator."

"Be quiet." I said before rolling down my window and ordering for both Jazz and myself. I pulled up to the first window to pay Jazz's drag queen, who he leaned across me to wink at. This guy at the window was extremely dolled up, and I would have hit on him too. Had he not been a dude and I not been married. But those little facts wouldn't bother Jazz until I remind him that, well you know, _she's_ a _he._

Once we got our food I took off again getting to Jaspers house in record time, and all but kicking him out of my car. I was about to pull away when I remembered to remind him.

"Be safe, Jazz. And for the love of god. The person at the drive through is a _dude._" Jasper nodded along until the last word where his face promptly scrunched up in terror. I smirked to myself and pulled off, making the short drive back to my house. I pulled into my drive way and was greeted by a smiling Jessie next door.

"Hey son!" He waved and I mustered up a smile because what the hell did Jessie ever do to me?

"Hey Jessie." I waved back and he squinted at me before picking up his newspaper.

"Are you all right? You look like you were punched in the face." I sighed.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks. I just had a rough night." I got out of the car and leaned against it heavily.

"Yeah… didn't we all…" I didn't really know what he was talking about so I just let it go. "I saw that Bella and the kids are back! And your, uh, cousin." I furrowed my eyebrows.

_Cousin?_

"Yeah, they came back yesterday." Jessie nodded and I shifted awkwardly, I wasn't very good at engaging in meaningful conversation while half asleep.

"Well don't let me hold you up, boy. You look dead on your feet." He said with a short wave before slowly making his way back into his house. "Tell your wife I said hello!"

I sighed and pushed off of the truck, following his lead and heading to my own home. "I will, see you." He nodded and slammed his door. I sauntered into my house and closed the door behind me only to hear the click of a gun behind me. Making my hand flinch for my own waist.

"Oh, it's you." Tanya's voice said from the steps as she lowered her gun. I nodded and finished closing and locking my door.

"Yeah, you might want to head down to the station or call the chief because some shit went down that you might want to know about." I mumbled before heading up the steps, she grabbed my sleeve.

"Like what? What happened with Alec and Mike?"

"Mike's dead. Alec has amnesia. It's all fucked. I need to go to sleep though." I pulled out of her grasp and made my way down the long hallway. I peeked into Ellie's room to see her curled up under her blanket. I went and bent over, kissing her forehead softly before leaving and going to Seth's room and repeating the action. I finally made my way back to my own bedroom and pushed the door open.

Bella was lying in a position similar to Ellie, curled in on herself with the blanket tucked around her tightly, I stripped quicker than I thought possible and crawled in behind her, pulling her into my chest. I sighed contently, burying my nose into her soft hair. She shifted slightly and sighed, her stiff body relaxing completely before she turned in my arms. She threw her arm around my waist and pushed her face into the crook of my neck.

"I'm glad you're back, Baby." She whispered groggily into my skin, her arms tightening around me. I sighed and relaxed against the pillow, closing my eyes and letting sleep overtake me.

I had been asleep for what seemed like ten minutes when I was shaken roughly. I groaned and rolled over, trying to get away from the shaking.

"What the-?" I was shaken harder and then pinched. I shot up rubbing my arm.

I cracked an eye open to see Bella throw a leg over me and straddle me. "When did you get here?" She asked, before wrapping her arms around my neck and kissing the hell out of me. "Why didn't you wake me up? I was worried." She pecked my lips again and I fought to keep my eyes open.

"I didn't want to _disturb_ you." I raised an eyebrow and she rolled her eyes, hugging me to her. She pulled away and squinted at me before growling.

"What happened to your face?" She turned my head to the side and I sighed.

"Don't worry about it, you should see the other guy." She smiled and peppered my cheek with kisses. "Baby…" I turned so that we were both on our sides and pulled her to my chest, closing my eyes.

"Edward-"

"Shh… let's sleep." Her head popped up and she sent me the bitch brow.

"Edward it's twelve o'clock. We need to get up. We should go check on Riley, he's in the hospital." I sighed and turned over. Bella smacked my back and there was a shit load of movement behind me. There was a loud crash and the bed shook some more, then I was attacked by cold hands and feet.

"Daddy! You're back!" I opened my eyes to find Ellie about a centimeter away from my face, her nose touching my own.

_Why is she so cold?_

"Hi, sweet heart." She hugged my neck and leaned in.

"You shouldn't have leaved. Mommy cried. Without the toilet this time." I shot a side glance at Bella, who blushed and looked away.

"Hormones… You know." She stood and made her way to the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

"You think she's mad at me?" Ellie pouted as she stared at the door, I shook my head sitting up and kissing her forehead. "Where's Uncle Riley?" I bit my lip and she frowned. "Did Aunt Alice get to him?" She shook her head and I stood up from the bed at the sound of Seth's wails.

"You wanna' come with me to get Seth?" She wrinkled her nose but nodded, jumping off of the bed and following after me.

My little boy's cries stopped as soon as I stepped into the room. He then beamed and jumped on his small mattress.

"Hey, buddy." I said softly, picking him up and smelling him. "Umm… Ellie I think this one is for you." I turned him towards her and she smacked my side.

"That's nasty. You're the poop picker upper. Like bounty!" She exclaimed before clapping. "I should be a rapper." My front door opened and closed and Alice screeched into my house. I grimaced and Ellie patted my arm. "It's okay, I got this." I lifted an eyebrow and she took off running.

"Go back to your corner, Aunt Alice!" I took off Seth's pants and changed his diaper quickly. I don't know what the hell is wrong with my kid but as soon as the pants came off his legs started going. I cleaned him up, put a diaper on him and then set him on the floor, letting him waddle around while holding my hand. We walked out into the hallway until Alice was visible in the foyer, with Jasper.

"Bella!" She screamed her eyes widening as she looked at me. Jasper looked perplexed and Seth fell onto his ass. "Bella!" She made a break for the steps and I moved once she neared me.

"She is so annoying. This is why I choose not to deal with hoe's, Daddy." Ellie said matter of factly.

I shook my head at Ellie and turned to Alice, "Bella's in the bathroom, Alice. What's wrong?" She just burst into my bedroom and soon after, the master bathroom.

"Cha-ow!" Alice hooted once in the bathroom, "Lookin' good, B. You know what I always say. If I weren't straight-" Bella started ranting from her place in the see through shower, and when I had reached the door she was pulling a towel around her waist.

"What the hell? Why is everyone in here?" She asked tucking the edge of her towel under her armpit and brushing the wet hair out of her face. She smacked Alice's shoulder, "Why are you in here?"

"Do you work out still?" Bella squinted at her friend, "Never mind. Your kid is walking!" She pulled Seth out of my arms and he groaned. Alice tossed me a glance over her shoulder, "Didn't want you to have to wait another week to find out." It was my turn to groan.

_Were we never going to let that go?_

…TEC…

**Hope you enjoyed!**

**Just hang in there, ladies! I'm aware that these aren't the funniest most interesting chapters but please still leave me your thoughts?**

**That is all he wrote folks. I am done with these EPOV's *wipes hands* they aren't as fun to write so I'm sticking with BPOV!**

**If we reach 735 I'd be so happy that I would update tomorrow!**


	30. Chapter 29

**Thanks to: dazzleglo, sandra moore, taylor. rox1992, malissamary55, muzaklover, KManzie, totes. Mah. Gotes, dowlingnana, Kayla, SweetPJL, DenisseSchmidt, jkkhreedy, Cockerspanmom, MaryMary123, Kgunter34, Yummy Dummy, alc1002, and luv2dance! You all made my day!**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

"Alice if you don't get the hell out of my bathroom I'm gonna drop kick your little ass." Ellie skidded into the room and held out her little hand, "Not now honey. Okay, all of you, out." I waved my hands, making sure I didn't let the towel fall.

Alice lifted her hands above her head and backed out of the room, followed by Edward and the kids. I turned back to the foggy stall and turned it back on before hopping in and rinsing off the remnants of the soap off of my body. I sighed and leaned back against the shower wall. The past week or so had been fucking horrible. My morning sickness had worsened with the addition of the stress. All of that shit with Riley and then us leaving… it was too much.

I sank down to the shower floor and breathed deeply, the shower started fucking spinning. I sighed and leaned my head against the wall. The bathroom door opened again and I groaned, thinking it was Alice coming back to quench her bi-curiosity.

"Bitch, if your back to check me out, you're gonna' get your ass kicked." I groaned, the shower door opened and I gasped as the cold air hit me. I looked up to see Edward's worried eyes. He turned and shut of the water before stepping in.

"I'd hope you weren't talking to me, beautiful." He said with a soft smile, I scrambled dizzily to me feet and half fell into him. "Woah… what's wrong?" He put his hands on my waist and steadied me.

"Nothing," I reached up and cupped his unbruised cheeks. "I'm glad your back."

He smiled at me and pecked my lips, "Me too." His hands slid down my hips and he cupped my ass, kneading it a bit and pulling me into him. He captured my lips before lifting me off of the ground slightly. I hitched my leg over his hip and ground into him. I moaned at the beautiful friction and let my head drop back against the wall.

"You know…" He thrust into me roughly and I cried out in pleasure. "we never got to finish what we started yesterday." He smiled before laying an open mouthed kiss on my neck, my hands clutched at his hair roughly. My stomach tingled with want as he rapidly hardened against my heat. His strong hands moved to massage my thighs, his ring finger slipped inside my tight cunt and I half screamed into his neck, quivering around his digits. His thumb came up to rub tight circles around my clit. He dropped his head onto my shoulder, watching his ministrations.

"Fucking hell, I can smell you…" He lifted his eyes and they were dark with lust, he licked his lips and thrust another finger into me. I rolled my hips into his thick, long fingers and moaned loudly. He chuckled, "You like that, Baby?" I nodded and bit my lip, bouncing on his fingers.

"I need to taste you, beautiful." My breath made a harsh exit at his words, he dropped to his knees quicker than I could blink and dove into my pussy with abandon. He drew one of my folds into his plump lips before slipping his tongue up and slurping up my arousal. I moaned at the feeling of his fingers driving into me and he trailed his free hand over my ass and down to the back of my knee, pulling my leg over his shoulder.

"Oh _fuck_…" I cried out in that _fucking voice_. He sucked my clit into his mouth, running his teeth over his lightly. I gasped and my back arched as my orgasm hit me like a fucking brick.

"Delicious." He said smirking up at me as I rode the waves of bliss. A banging on the door made my eyes fall closed as Edward released my clit, and stood quickly.

"Who is it?" I yelled.

"It's Jazz. Come on! Are we going to the hospital or…" Edward wrapped my towel around me, kissing my neck, before he made to leave the shower.

"Yeah we are." I grabbed his arm and pulled him back towards me, grasping his erection through his sweatpants. I lowered my voice so that Jasper wouldn't be able to hear me, "I need you."

"Bella-"

"Shh-shh-shh," I put a finger to his lips and ducked my hand into his boxer brief, using his precum as lubricant to run my hand up and down his dick.

"Excuse me! What the hell are you doing?" I rolled my eyes and dropped to my knees.

"Bella…?" Edward's words stopped when I wrapped my lips around the thick head of his glorious cock.

I pulled off of him with a pop, continuing my hand movements. "What the fuck is it to you Jasper?" I asked before returning to my sexy husbands throbbing cock. I trailed my tongue over the veins before twirling it around the head. Edwards head fell back and he braced himself against the wall, covering his mouth with one hand and fisting the other into my hair.

"I just want to know how long we'll be waiting!"

"I'm…" I kissed Edward's cock with a smile as it twitched under my ministrations. "putting on makeup." I rolled my eyes and took him completely into my mouth letting him hist the back of my throat, his hand tightened in my hair and I reached up to massage his balls.

"I call bull _shit_. You don't wear makeup! Come on, Bella!" I would have answered him, had Edward not been thrusting into my mouth. I grasped onto his hips and pushed him into the wall, pulling off of him and standing up.

"Baby?" Edward whispered.

"Jasper! I'm going to cut your _fucking_ dick off if you don't get out of my room." I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed his deeply, caressing his tongue slowly.

Jasper yelped from the other side of the door, "Oop! Need that. See you when you're done." Then there were the tell-tale thuds of him leaving the room.

I wrapped my hand around Edwards cock again and attempted to jack him off, "Come on, Baby." I whispered in his ear before sucking the lobe between my lips. "Cum for me." I pressed our naked chests together and bit his ear, running my thumb over his head. He pulsed in my hand and his thick streams shot onto my stomach. I smiled and kissed him again, reaching around to turn on the shower again.

_Come on now, I couldn't go to a hospital smelling like jizz._

After showering and dressing as quickly as possible we were making our way down the steps, with big ass smiles. Alice and Ellie sat on the couch arguing while Jasper played with a half-naked Seth.

I gestured to him and quirked an eyebrow, "Clothes?" Edward shrugged and kissed my neck before going to pick up Seth and put pants on him. I hope that whole naked running infatuation he had would fade with age.

"Alright," I sighed clapping my hands together, "time to go." Edward came back down the steps, putting on Seth's pants all the while. We hustled out to the car as fast as possible, taking Jaspers car for its spaciousness. I wrinkled my nose at our seating arrangement.

"Wait, why do I have to sit in the back of my own car?" I turned around to see Alice frowning from her seat next to Ellie.

"You two are the smallest, Ali-pie." Jasper said with an affectionate smile in her direction. Alice reached over my head to point next to where Seth was buckled in.

"Ahem?" She cleared her throat.

"What do you want? A prize? Sit down." I huffed, resting my head against the seat. She grunted and fell back into her seat.

"It's _not_ that bad, Aunt Alice." Ellie said with a roll of her eyes. Alice huffed again and we all fell under long silence which was highly unusual for this group.

"Okay… Okay," Ellie groaned before sitting up straight, "Since no one wants to talk… I have a boyfriend." I smirked at her and watched Edward have a conniption. I laid a hand on his shoulder laughing softly.

"Calm down." I turned to Ellie and she blushed. "Does he know?"

"Daddy? He should I didn't stutter." Edward tensed and whipped around to look at Ellie.

"You aren't allowed to have a boyfriend until you're…" A vein bulged in his forehead. "Fifty. Fifty five." He yelled.

"Will you calm down? She's _seven_. He probably doesn't even know they're dating." I said softly as Jasper pulled into the hospital parking lot. Ellie hopped over the seat next to me as I unbuckled Seth. My door shot open and Edward picked up Ellie.

"Tell me about this boyfriend." He gritted but she either didn't notice or didn't care about his anger because she threw an arm around his neck like she was telling an old story.

"You know him. Remember Jared?" My teeth clenched at the mention of that egg throwing little fucker. I rushed through the unbuckling of my youngest and followed after Edward before he strangled Ellie.

_Or Jared._

I kept a sneaky eye on Edward and Ellie, "Mama?" Seth tugged at my hair and I turned towards him.

"Eh-wie," Then he leaned forward and kissed my cheek.

_Aw, look at my little tattle._

"Shh, don't tell Daddy, okay?" He nodded and I kissed his forehead. I looked up and was met with clear blue eyes and a gentle smile.

_Well __**hello**__ hot doc._

"Bella it's nice to see you again." He said softly, I shook his hand.

"You too, Carlisle. Do you know where Riley Masen is?"

"You _kissed _him?" Edward whisper yelled from next to me.

"Excuse me for a second," I smiled politely, before turning to sneer at Edward and pull Ellie out of his grasp putting her on the ground. "You stop talking." I pointed at her, before turning my finger on Edward. "Calm the fuck down." An older woman passed me and gave me a dirty look before muttering, "Classy…"

"As fuck." I finished for her, earning a sneer.

_Old women don't like me._

_Guess I'll worry about the next time I'm in need for a sugar mama._

Edward had gone off to talk to Jasper when I turned back towards Carlisle. "Riley Masen?" He smiled hesitantly and went back to the nurses' station, flipping through some charts before mumbling. "306."

"Thank you. And how is he doing?"

"He's completely lost as to where he is. And why he's here. I'd help him out with that a little bit." I nodded.

"Thanks again." I turned and gathered everyone together. "Okay. Edward and I will go in first. See if I can jog his memory any, the Edward and Jasper and then Alice." I clapped my hands together and got several nods. Minus Alice.

_Of course._

"What?"

"Why do I have to go in last?"

"I don't know, why are you acting like a fucktard?"

"Touché." I rolled my eyes and turned to Edward. "You ready?" He nodded and sent Ellie a look which she responded to with a roll of her neck.

"She's seven. It doesn't even count at seven." I whispered and grabbed his hand pulling him towards Riley's room.

"How are you feeling, Riley?" A nurse asked as she checked some shit above his head.

"I'm quiet alright, and you?" My eyebrows furrowed at the strength of his accent. Does amnesia do that to you? Maybe I should bang my head against the wall for awhile.

_Well nothing seems all that bad when you can get a cool accent out of it..._

"Riley?" I stepped further into the room and he smiled.

"Hey,"

"How do you feel?" He huffed and rolled his eyes playfully.

"How many people are going to ask me that? I'm fine." I pulled up a chair and he jerked his head towards Edward in acknowledgment.

"You remember anything yet?" Riley shrugged and his nurse shook her head.

"It can take a while for things. Especially for him to remember names. He's only been here since early this morning." She shook her head, and walked out of the room.

"So…" I said awkwardly at a loss for words. "What's up…?" I bit my lip and Edward snorted from behind me.

"Well there's something a bit off about this whole situation…" He said his eyes going to Edward. "This chap called me 'Alec'. Earlier… Everyone else calls me Riley." He looked to me and I turned towards Edward.

"Heh… Middle names are great nicknames… In my opinion…" His tone was so pathetic that I winced.

"You aren't good at this." I mumbled.

"The truth, please?" Alec asked, I turned towards Edward again and he avoided my gaze. "Bella?" Our heads whipped towards him.

_Well I'll be damned._

"You know my name!" I gasped shooting out of my chair, and knocking my head into Edwards chin.

"Fucking hell… You broke my chin!" Edward gasped pitifully.

"I'm sorry, Baby…" I grabbed his chin and kind of shook his head back and forth. "You'll be fine." I pecked his lips and then launched myself at Riley.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and he made a choking noise. "You know my name!" He shrugged and then strong hands wrapped around my waist pulling me away.

"He was turning blue, baby. Calm down." Riley started choking.

_My bad._

"What's my name?" I asked in a soft tone. "Say my name say my name… when no one is around you say baby I love you-" Edward winced at my singing voice and I stopped.

"Bella." Riley said with a smirk.

"He's not three, Bella."

I turned to Edward, "Shh." Back to Riley. "Who am I?"

"Bella…"

"I mean _who _am I?"

"I plead the fifth."

"Not valid. Okay, to him I am…?" I pointed between Edward and I.

"A woman."

"No. Well… yes. Kind of. I mean I _am _a woman compared to Edward but what is my relationship to him?"

"You're related?" I wrinkled my nose and Edward shook his head.

"I'd hope not. Or else there is some serious incest going on." I snorted before shaking my head at myself. Riley squinted and I don't think he understood the joke…

_Awkward…_

"We aren't related as far as we know."

Edward blinked rapidly, "Okay stop… incest… _no_." I smirked and turned back to Riley.

"You two are best friends." I squinted at him.

"What? No. No! It really isn't that complicated."

"Adopted siblings." He really thought he had gotten it this time. I mean he clapped and snapped and everything. His eyes lit up and everything.

_I had to shut that shit down._

"Would you kiss your adopted sibling, Riley?" I pulled Edwards face to mine and kissed him quickly.

"Not like that… But different strokes, man." He held up his hands and I wanted to kick him in the face.

"Oh my g- Pay attention!"

"Bella," Edward wiped his bottom lip. "I don't think you yelling at him and giving him clues will prove his… you know." He gestured to his head and looked at his finger. "Did you bite me?"

"Possibly." I shrugged, waiving him off. "Do you remember Ellie?" He shook his head. "What's my last name?"

"Masen." I clapped.

"What's his last name?" I poked Edward's stomach.

"Masen?"

"Good! Who-"

"Bella. Give him a break. His memory will come back just give it a while." I sighed. The door opened behind us and we all turned to see the nurse walk in.

"Hey, what could make someone's memory come back sooner?" I asked, she shrugged.

"I don't know a lot of things can trigger someone's memory. Usually relationships… sexual relations more so. You know like lovers and then there's family there isn't really much more."

"_Oh_," I gasped. "This is _awkward_." I smiled and stepped away from her to see Riley lift an eyebrow. "_Hold_ on now, buddy." He held up his hands.

"Anything else?" Edward asked, his tone shockingly even.

"Random things but that's not very likely, so…" I nodded and she checked some stuff and left.

"Wow." I spun on Edward, "Good for you! You didn't flip out or anything." I slapped his shoulder in congratulations and he rolled his eyes.

"I know you two didn't sleep together. I mean _come on_." Riley snorted.

"Wait a second." I held up a hand. "I could sleep with him if I wanted to."

"_Okay,_ Bella." My eyebrow shot up.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked indignantly.

"Nothing, Baby…" Edward wrapped his arm around my waist and kissed the top of my head.

"I knew it. You're married. Right?" Riley smirked smugly.

"Okay. I'm getting Jasper." I rolled my eyes and left the room.

"Jasper, you're next right?" He nodded and stood.

He grabbed my wrist as I passed him and pulled me in closer. "When you see ugly children on TV don't you just want to punch someone?" I squinted at him.

"Oh must not be a universal thing."

"What the hell are you talking about?" He smirked.

"Don't worry about it doll face. Have you ever flirted with a transvestite by accident?"

"Walk away, Jasper. Bye." I shook my head and pulled out of his grasp. Ellie and Alice sat on the hard lobby chairs their hands in midair. Seth waddled up to me and I picked him up, kissing his cheek.

"Hi, baby!" I pretended to bite his cheek and he giggled.

"No, Mama!" He squeezed my nose.

I turned to Alice and Ellie, "If you're in mid bitch fit mode tell me now so that I can leave."

"We were playing patty-cake dumbass." Ellie put down her hand and held it back up in her 'gimme' kind of way. "You don't deserve a dollar. What kind of seven year old can't play patty-cake?"

Ellie rolled her eyes, "You obviously don't understand that I was _trying_ to hit you in the face." Alice's mouth rounded into an '_O_'.

"I sorry, Mama."

"No it's okay, Pumpkin. It's not your fault she's an idiot." I nuzzled his nose and he smiled hugging me tightly.

…TEC…

**Hope you laughed and or enjoyed!**

**Oh Jasper… *shakes head***

**Let's get to 755 for an update tomorrow? It's up to you :D**


	31. Chapter 30

**Thank you all for the reviews! They meant a lot to me, honestly :D**

**Thanks to: melissamary55 (who's penname I messed up last chapter. My apologies), Cici G (Multiple times thanks :D), kelliekinz, Music ADD, KManzie, alc1002, sandra moore, Allypattinson, totes. Mah. Gotes, SweetPJL, Yummy Dummy, Cockerspanmom, bearygirl, dowlingnana, Kayla, Kgunter34, dazzleglo, and DenisseSchmidt.**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

"Have a good day, pumpkin!" I squeezed Ellie tightly before watching her line up behind her teacher in front of her school.

I watched her line up behind her _new_ teacher.

I glared at that Yorkie prick before turning and going back to my car. When I was seated Alice clapped loudly, "You know what? We should go shopping."

"You know what? You should go home!" I said matching her enthusiasm. She rolled her eyes and turned in her seat.

"You wanna' go shopping, big boy?" Seth bounced and clapped from his car seat. "Yeah you _do_! To baby gap!"

"No Alice, look. I'm going to take you home. Then I'm going to head down to the station and have a little talk with Charlie." Jasper had told me about the argument between him and Edward after Edward fucking _solved the case._

"Why do you need to go to the station?"

I lifted an eyebrow, "_I need to speak with Charlie_."

"I meant why?"

"Don't worry about it." She shrugged and sat back in her seat.

"I'm going with you. Jazzy and I can go out for lunch."

"It's eight thirty in the morning. Charlie probably won't even let him off. Hell he wouldn't let Edward off until exactly twelve once when I met him for lunch."

"We all know that Charlie isn't too fond of Edward though… He probably just needs to get laid." I wrinkled my nose. "I could help him with that… for a price." I swear I almost ran off the road.

"What?" I mentally started mentally writing my apology to Ellie.

_Dear Pumpkin,_

_You were right all of this time. She's a whore._

_Sincerely,_

_Mommy_

It wasn't very heartfelt but hey, I'm not a very heart felt person. I can't just pull this shit out of my ass.

Well _technically_ I can pull _shit_ from my ass. Not the most sanitary activity but to each their own.

"Do you really want to go to the station?" She nodded and I shrugged, turning in the necessary direction. We soon reached our destination and I lifted an eyebrow when I saw Edward's car. He told me that he had the whole week off…

"Dadda!" Seth screamed in the backseat, the still car started to shake as he bounced in his seat. I wonder what people think of my _bouncing baby boy_ when they see him… Do they go 'how cute?' or 'mhmm… crack baby'? I mean to be honest when he first came out bouncing and purple and what not I jumped to conclusions.

_Definite crack baby._

"I wonder what he's doing here?" I said quietly to myself.

"_Oh_ if he's cheating, I've got my pocket knife. On _hand,_ girl." I squinted at my challenged best friends and headed towards the office.

"Hey, Denali." I waved politely to her and she rolled her eyes making me curl a lip.

"You here to see Edward?"

Alice leaned into me, and whispered. "Well unless he's batting for the other team, I doubt he's cheating on you since we got this whoretary working the desk today." She jabbed a finger in Tanya's face and Tanya smacked it.

"Pointing and whispering kind of takes away the whole _secret_ effect." Tanya rolled her eyes and I snorted.

_Whoretary._

Alice nudged me again. "You know what I mean, _batting for the other team?_" she continued, "Coloring outside the lines? Packing the fudge?" I shook my head, wishing she would stop. "Sleeping with men. Besides yourself of course." I smacked her arm and Seth laughed his ass off. Most likely not even understanding the joke.

"If he were into the manly type he probably would have gone for you." I quipped, Alice giggled and I turned back to Tanya.

"Where's Charlie?" Tanya checked the book at her finger tips as though she were actually looking for something not realizing I could see her magazine. She drifted her finger over _Better Sex Tips_ and tapped _foreplay_. I rolled my eyes and she looked up.

"Yeah, it says he's in his office."

"I'm sure. I see," I leaned over and tapped the magazine in a similar fashion. "Right between oral and digital." I waved and Seth played with my hair. I smirked at Tanya and took off down the short hall. I knocked impatiently on the door.

Charlie gruff voice rang out, "Come in."

I pushed the door open and marched in.

"We need to talk." My whole authorative presence was ruined when Seth started reaching for Charlie. I sighed and passed him over.

Charlie smiled and kissed Seth's cheek, before giving me a one sided hug. "What's up?"

"Why are you being a dick to Edward?" I arched an eyebrow and he furrowed his.

"I don't know what you're talking about. But _if_ I did, why doesn't he just ask me about it?"

"You obviously do know what I'm talking about. He doesn't know I'm here." Charlie sat behind his desk and I plopped into the chair on the opposite side.

"Well why don't you tell him to stop being a pussy, and talk to me about it?" I winced at his use of the word, in disgust.

"He doesn't know _I'm_ _here_, Charlie."

"He obviously told on me. He's a bigger tattle than the girl."

"What girl?"

"Ellie."

"Why didn't you just say Ellie?"

"I'm getting older, Bella." He sighed.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Seth crawled across Dad's desk and I caught him before he tumbled off of the edge. The door shot open behind me and Emmett stomped in.

"Oh looky there. It's like a family reunion." He smacked a kiss on my cheek and yanked Seth from me before plopping his big ass into my lap.

"Here we go, pops." He tossed a file onto Charlie's desk and then tossed Seth into the air.

"Emmett! Don't do that because if you miss him, I will feed you your balls for _dinner._" He caught Seth and held him to his chest.

"Bella, be nice." Charlie scolded; I peeked around Emmett's massive form and glared.

"Like father like daughter." I frowned and sighed deeply.

"He fucked up."

"Who?" Emmett whispered.

"Edward."

"Well he did a damn good job in those interrogations, Pop."

"Emmett stop calling me that."

"Will do, Pa." Charlie rolled his eyes.

"What interrogations?" I smacked Emmett's shoulder and he smacked my leg, simultaneously crushing it with his heavy ass.

"He interviewed McCarty, Patino, and Johnson. Kicked ass. He was so professional and got all of the shit we needed for the trial." Emmett gushed. I kinked and eyebrow at Charlie and he rolled his eyes and sat back in his seat. Emmett chuckled and relaxed back in my lap, resting his head against my neck.

"Emmett! Get the fuck off of me!" I gripped the arm rests of my chair and scooted myself backward in a fluid motion. Emmett fell onto his back and Seth cried out. Of course I fucking forgot he was holding my kid. Seth was okay in the end, falling against Emmett's chest. I picked up Seth and glared at Charlie.

"Stop being a jerk, Dad." Seth wagged a finger at him and turned, leaving the office.

"Oomph!" Strong arms encircled my waist and I looked up to see confused green eyes, righting Seth in my arms.

"Dada!" Edward released me and lifted Seth into his arms.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, tickling our son a bit.

"Why hello to you too, jackass." He smirked at me and pulled me closer, dipping his head to kiss my neck.

"_Hi_, honey. What are you doing here?" I shrugged.

"I could ask you the same." He pursed his lips and shrugged.

"I had to interrogate a few people. And you?"

"I had to talk to Charlie." I turned my head to see him and Emmett looking out of the window. Emmett was completely turned around, sticking his forefinger through a hole he made with his thumb and other forefinger mouthing '_get some_' and Charlie was behind him, at his desk pursing his lips, obviously unaware of Em's actions. Seth waved to them smiling widely.

"What-?" Edward pointed towards the window and I pushed him backwards so that we were out of their sight.

"Idiots, don't worry about it. Charlie's being…" I waived the thought. "Silly." Seth grinned and reached for my cheek.

"Their silly aren't they, cutie?" He nodded and giggled pinching the living fuck out of my cheek. "Okay… heh heh okay let go, honey…" I pulled his little hand away and Edward snorted. The door in front of us shot open right in our faces and Edwards hand shot out stopping me before I collided with the large metal door.

Two cops strong armed an older man down the hall, "This is ridiculous. He owes me money! If you look at the records and-" The hysterical man's eyes shot to us and he stopped talking as he took in his biological grandson. His gaze then drifted up to Edward.

"Edward, son." He pleaded. "Don't do this…"

I saw red.

"Are you kidding, dipshit?" I yelled Crowley and Johnson stopped in their tracks, holding McCarty still.

"Bella." Edward warned quietly.

I held up a hand and marched over to the cops, "Let's go I can walk and talk at the same time. I'm a fuck awesome multitasker."

"That you are, Swan." Crowley said quietly before jerking Robert into motion.

I started in on Robert, "You really are a twisted fuck aren't you? And for someone so high in ranking in a fucking million dollar corporation you think you'd be smarter." I had been fuming over this man's presence since the first interview and I was fucking giddy that I can tear his ass apart and blame it on the hormones this time.

"Are you going to let her speak to me like this?" Robert asked going red in the face.

"Bella! Come on." Edward said tersely, I turned and shot him an incredulous look. He held up his hands and shook his head stepping backwards.

"Back to you," I turned and kept up the brisk pace that the officers were keeping. "What are you trying to do fuck with his head? You must be stupider than I thought. You _left_ him, dickskin. You're a murderer! You want a reprisal from the man that you fucked over? Agh!" Johnson shook his head and pushed McCarty into the holding cell, locking it after him, patting me on the back and walking away.

"Good luck sending those late birthday gifts from jail, Fucker." Robert jumped at me and I rolled my eyes. "News flash. You're in a _jail_ _cell_ dumbass. You want me to flinch?" I turned on my heel and sighed, a wave of relief washing over me as I left the holding area. I grumbled to myself as I walked the halls looking for Edward, "Old ass wana jump at somebody…" I shook my head and Alice stumbled out of Jaspers office in front of me, straightening her hair.

I peeked around the door, into the office and waved at Jasper, he tossed me a lazy smile and buttoned his shirt.

"Oh…" I said awkwardly, I shook my head at Alice and she shrugged.

"Quick lunch… _quickie_ what's the difference?"

"Penetration." She snorted.

"There was none of that, Honey." She moved her fist to and from her open mouth and made a choking noise.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

She lifted an eyebrow, "I could ask you the same. What happened?" My eyes started to tear up and I started to get angrier because I was fucking crying.

_Stupid tears…_

She reached into her purse and flipped open a knife.

_A big ass knife._

"Who did it?"

…TEC…

**Hope you laughed and or enjoyed!**

**Please excuse any dumb mistakes, I cranked this out between rehearsals and don't have much review time :(**

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**Review!**


	32. Chapter 31

_**Hear me out! I've been **_**crazy **_**busy this weekend and I missed yesterday's update. I'm so sorry. But thank you for your reviews the mean SO MUCH to me. Keep 'em coming!**_

_**Thanks to: dazzleglo, Sandra moore, Indianprincess28, melissamary55, KManzie, Music ADD, koleen05, christmastree, Cockerspanmom, MaryMary123 (I hope this chapter clears something's up), Cici G, rlwoods, SweetPJL, dowlingnana, jkkhreedy, bearygirl, DenissaSchmidt, totes. Mah. Gotes, Kgunter34, alc1002, and Yummy Dummy. Much love to you all!**_

_**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**_

…TEC...

"She has been suspended for the rest of the week."

"But it's Monday."

"Yes ma'am."

"You're suspending a seven year old for _five days?_"

"Yes."

"Ugh, I'll be right down." I muttered pulling on a pair of jeans and balancing the phone between my ear and shoulder. Two large hands wrapped around my waist and I was pulled into a broad, warm chest.

"Where are you going?" He whispered in my ear groggily. I reached over my shoulder and cupped his face bringing his lips to mine.

I wrapped my fingers in his hair and pulled away, resting my forehead against his. "I need to get Ellie." His green eyes showed his confusion before darting to the clock at our bedside.

"It's only twelve." I shrugged and kissed his neck before standing and pulling on a t-shirt. "Wait, I'll come with you." He too stood and pulled me into him again.

"Stay here. Get some sleep," I ran my thumb over the bags underneath his eyes. I pulled away and checked the baby monitor, making sure it was on. "I'll be right back." I shrugged on my jacket before heading down to the car.

Ellie was going to need some sort of intervention if she didn't get it together. The kid stayed in trouble and I don't even know what would happen if this continued. She was already expelled. I went through, what, sixteen-plus- _years_ without being suspended. She was in _second_ grade. I didn't even know that shit was possible. I shook my head on the ride over. This was getting ridiculous. At the rate she was going she'd be expelled by ten schools by the sixth grade.

I made it to the school in no time, rushing in to see Ellie playing her Nintendo DS in the chair across from her principals. I shook my head and grabbed the game, sticking it into my purse.

"Bella Masen." I leaned over and shook her principles hand before sitting in the chair next to Ellie's. "What happened?" Mrs. Cope, her principle gave Ellie a pointed glance and the little girl frowned straightening in her chair.

"I just wanted to safe up a little bit of money."

"Tell her what you did, Ellie."

"I was thinking ahead, saving for my college fund." Mrs. Cope shook her head.

"Ellie!" I groaned, running a hand through my hair.

"I was investing. In a future career." She nodded to herself. "Teaching. I was helping."

"_Damn it._ Ellie, what did you do?" I asked impatiently.

"I was _teaching_ my friends cuss words. I was also making a _profit_ and _saving_ for college." She pointed at her head. "And you want to suspend this beautiful mind?"

"Ellie stop talking." I whispered, she closed her mouth and we both looked to Mrs. Cope.

"She'll need to collect her classwork from all her teachers." I nodded.

"Is teaching children cuss words really worth a week of suspension?"

"That's what I was trying to say Mommy! This is unjust."

"Ellie, be quiet." I gritted. "You're lucky I didn't bring Daddy down here."

"Yours or mine?"

"Which one scares you more?"

"Well they both have guns…" Mrs. Cope gasped.

"They're both policemen." She sighed and nodded.

"Daddy is scarier; he'll take away my stuff." She decided with a nod.

"Then _your _Dad." She bit her lip. "Thank you for your time Mrs. Cope." I shook her hand again before taking Ellie's hand so that I could escort her towards her teacher.

"We have to go to Mr. Banner and then Ms. Kay." She said pulling me into a classroom full of children; Mr. Banner looked up and winced when I entered.

"Mrs. Masen?" I nodded and he stood from his desk to shake my hand. "It's nice to meet you. Could have been a better circumstance but…" I nodded. "Ellie is truly a great student and a _brilliant _child. We're lucky to have her." I smiled and looked at my precious little suspendie.

"She just needs to watch her language, am I correct Ms. Ellie?" She blushed and nodded. "Go on and get your backpack dear." Mr. Banner and I shit chatted a bit while Ellie was seen off by every fucking kid in her class.

"Ellie, come on." I held out my hand and she ran up, her backpack bouncing along the way.

"We aren't going to tell Daddy about this little mishap… right?" She asked as I helped buckle her in.

_Mishap._

"Daddy's going to find out at some point. He's home right now." She groaned and I closed the door, climbing into my own seat and starting up the car. "What's gotten into you?" I asked meeting her eyes in my rearview mirror. She shrugged and reached for the lone water bottle rolling across the ground.

"You think Daddy will be mad?"

"I think he'll be disappointed." She nodded and took a sip from the water bottle.

"Why don't you just tell him you got me for lunch?"

"Because I'm not here to stop you from getting into trouble. I'm here to help you develop as a person. First cussing at teachers and now this?" I shook my head.

"I'm sorry, Mommy." I nodded and pulled into the driveway. We both bumbled our way up to the door before it was pulled open.

"Hi, Baby." I said before pecking his cheek, Ellie passed by me quietly her head down as she dropped her backpack. I patted Edward's chest while his gaze was focused on Ellie.

"What's this?" He asked gesturing to Ellie.

"I got expelled." Edward's eyes widened and I shook my head.

"Suspended. She was suspended."

"That's not better… How do you even get suspended? You're in second grade!" His voice rose as he spoke.

"Calm down, you don't even know what she did." I turned towards her and met her wide, glassy eyed gaze. Call me a dumbass but I had a soft spot for my kids. Even if one did get a week's suspension. "Go to your room. No TV or anything electronic." She nodded and darted up the steps. Edward looked upon us incredulously.

"Are you serious?" His voice raised an octave. "Bella you have to _try_ to get suspended in fucking elementary school!" He said once she was gone, I slipped out of my jacket quietly. Making my way to where Seth was in his play pen, watching cartoons.

Edward followed me impatiently, "Bella!"

"Calm down." I said lifting Seth from his confinement.

"No, you should be pissed too! If she gets suspended in fucking second grade imagine how it'll be when she's older!"

I sighed heavily and set Seth back down, wrapping my arms around Edward's waist. "I know, maybe we should address this later." His eyes widened further, if that were even possible.

"What?" I pushed him backwards until he fell back onto the couch, before straddling him.

"I said we should come back to it when you aren't so mad." I looked in his eyes before giving an encouraging nod. "We should-" I leaned into kiss him and turned to see Seth's eyes intently watching our every move. "We should talk about Charlie." I said moving off of his lap. "What'd you do to piss him off?" I joked light heartedly. He rolled his eyes and huffed.

"I don't know." He let out a humorless chuckle. "He's probably mad because I'm getting more than he is." He smirked and I shook my head. "Most likely because I'm getting it from you. Speaking of getting some from you…" He pulled my leg up over his lap. Over his erection.

_Only a guy could go from furious to horny in three seconds flat._

I mentally brushed off a shoulder.

_I'm good_.

"Who told you Charlie was pissed?" He asked after I blatantly shut him down with a look at our watching one year old.

"Jasper. I've seen Charlie be an ass to you though after you do some fairly amazing shit." He nodded.

"He was so fucking mad after Jazz and I caught those jackasses it isn't even funny." He snorted and I turned laying my head in his lap, stretching out along the couch.

"Well next time he does that, you tell me, okay?"

"What? No." I looked up at him and he was shaking his head. "I don't need you to fight my battles, baby. I don't need your dad hating me and thinking I'm a pussy on top of it all."

"He won't think you're a pussy." My cell phone vibrated in my pocket and I looked at the screen that told me we were supposed to go and see Riley now.

"A grown man that has his _pregnant wife_ fight his battles for him is by definition. A pussy." I sat up, scooting backwards into his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"You're my-" I was going to say 'pussy' but that shit didn't sound right so I just stopped. "Never mind." He smirked and nodded.

"Aren't we supposed to see Riley now?" I nodded and moved off of his lap.

"Ellie?" I screamed up to her. There was a thump before she came into view. "Get your coat, pumpkin."

She dropped down to her knees clasping her hands in front of her, "Don't take me to the fire station, Mommy."

"What are you talking about?"

"Casey said his mom said she was gonna take him to the fire station if he acted up. You know, like give him away?" Edward snorted behind me as he picked up Seth.

"We aren't taking you to a fire station. We're visiting Riley." She nodded and ran back to her room.

"How long was she suspended for?"

"A week." Edwards jaw dropped and Seth slapped him roughly. He glared at the little boy and Seth gripped his cheeks.

"Okay?" He screamed at Edward, I doubled over in laughter and grabbed my son before he ended up at the fire station.

"What the hell did she do?"

"She was making kids pay her, so that they could learn new cuss words."

He shook his head, "Well that's all you." My eyebrows furrowed.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You can't tell me that's not something you would do at her age?" He lifted his eyebrows and continued. "You're the curser."

"So? I also pay her when I cuss."

_Now how the fuck did that prove my point?_

"Disregard that, jackass." He chuckled and pulled me into his side.

"I think we should work on our language."

"We said that when she cussed at Mr. Yorkie, didn't help obviously. Maybe we should just let her be a hipster. She can take up skateboarding and everything." I bit my lip to hold in my laughter and he slapped my ass before moving to the coat closet.

"As long as she's a sensible hipster."

"If there were a such thing as a sensible hipster, they wouldn't be called a hipster."

"Or they'd be more of a hipster than their hipster friends because they aren't following hipster protocol."

"Hipster protocol kind of ruins the term hipster wouldn't you think?"

"Not really, I mean hipsters are the cool kids. They'd need a protocol."

"They aren't the cool kids, hipsters are the ones that don't follow the rules."

"So how the hell are we supposed to know a hipster from everyone else?"

"You don't. That's why it's so hip." I answered. Ellie galloped down the steps and we were out of the door in no time.

"So what's gonna happen, Daddy? Am I grounded forever? Do I have to sleep outside?"

"No. You are grounded, but we decided its Mommy's fault so you can stay inside this time."

_I know what a hipster is. I'm a hipster._

_Hipster's are never truly appreciated._

I shook my head and slapped Edward's stomach, not wanting to interrupt his driving by punching his arm.

"How the hell is it my fault?" He pointed at me and I slapped away his finger. We arrived at the hospital quickly due to Edwards speeding.

"Daddy actually said it was his fault. Because if he wasn't such a jackass I wouldn't have to continuously call him a jackass in front of you, sweetie." Edward scoffed, pulling out the stroller and placing Seth into it.

"You can't end a sentence like that with _sweetie_."

"Oh can't I?" He smirked and wagged his finger at me again. When I moved to slap at it he wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me closely and bit my neck gently, before kissing the spot languidly.

"Since we know that I'm impreshible when it comes to what you do… is this really appropiate for me to see? Wouldn't want me necking in the hallways." Edward bit me again and I blushed at his display. I pulled away from him and grabbed a hold of the stroller, pushing it towards the doors.

"How do you know all of these big words kid?"

_Not that you said them right… She gets points for using them correctly though._

"Believe it or not I get _them_ from you, too." She shrugged and Edward let out a 'hmm'. "And Alice."

"And here I thought the only words you learned from Alice were hoe, whore and prostitute." She shrugged.

"What'd I say, Mommy? Beautiful mind." She pointed at her head and then grabbed Edward's hand.

"I think that just means your spending too much time with adults." Edward shook his head and picked her up. "We should find you some nice little _girls_ to play with. You should be playing house… not cursing."

"Riley Masen, please." I said to the nurse at the station, she nodded and pointed down to his wing rattling off the number we knew so well.

"Riley?"

He looked up from his book, "Bella!"

"Hi, honey." I hugged him after getting Seth situated in the corner. "How do you feel?"

"Alright. What are you doing here, kid?" He asked opening his arms to Ellie. It was shocking the difference in him now and when I'd first met him. He was a lot easier going. The death of someone so close to you in the family can make you withdraw a bit though. So I understand the difference between him then being so hurt and now, having a fresh start.

"Edward." He greeted with a goofy smile, gibing Edward that manly half hug, half hand shake, thing. He and Edward had started to act more brotherly too. Which was a large step away from what they'd been. A large, welcomed, step.

"So, Miss Ellie. You have a holiday or something today?"

"I got suspended." She looked at the ground.

"That sucks,"

"Not really. I don't have to go to school." She whispered loudly. Edward and I gave her disapproving looks and she blushed bashfully. Ellie jumped up on the bed next to Riley and pulled off one of her shoes, a sock following.

"Ellie. He has amnesia. He didn't lose his sense of smell put your shoe on." She turned to Riley, essentially ignoring me.

"Oh-ho!" Riley smiled clapping his hands together. "I sense a pointless conversation coming on. Lay it on me, chick!" He tickled Ellie's side.

"Okay, have you ever felt like you have more than five toes?" She made a show of counting out all five of her toes and wiggling them in his face. "It looks like I have more right?"

"About thirteen, yeah." He chuckled before she hugged him again. I leaned against the wall next to Edwards chair and sighed. He frowned at my action.

"Excuse my lack of manners, Baby." He said softly before pulling me into his lap. "I shouldn't have taken the only seat." The hospital door swung open and Alice marched in, hands on hips. She didn't even speak; she snatched my purse and pulled out her machete-like pocket knife, sticking it into her own massive bag.

"I needed this earlier. Now you've set me back." I had confiscated her unconcealed weapon when we were in the station two days ago, after

I jumped up and she waved to Riley, "Need it for what?"

"This fucker cut me off on the high way, he's at the book store now. I'm slitting some mother fucking tires." She said before moving out of the room.

"You tailed him?"

"I did."

"You are crazy as hell." I laughed.

"He flipped me off and threw a phone charger out of the window, Bella. It hit my windshield and cracked that mother fucker up. I'm _pissed._"

_Well… Crazies do tend to attract crazies though._

"Okay, okay." I sighed pulling my keys out of my purse and leaning around the wall separating the hall and Riley's room, and tossing Edward the key ring. "I'll be back."

"Come on." I said almost running out of the hospital with her at my side. "I'll steal his hub caps for you."

"Oh, see _this_ is why we're best friends." She said giving me a quick hug.

_Like I said. _

_Crazies attract crazies._

…TEC…

_**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**_

_**I'm conflicted… I'm not sure when to end the story. Would you like:**_

_**Another few chapters and an epilogue**_

_**An epilogue and just an end**_

_**A few chapters and a third story**_

_**I really need your help because I love writing these and hearing from you all but I don't want anything of mine to just drag on and become boring. Leave me your thoughts! **_

_**P.S. THIS ISN'T THE LAST CHAPTER! I PROMISE!**_

_**Let's aim for 800? For an update tomorrow!**_

_**Don't be a hipster or do (depends on your definition)! Review!**_


	33. Chapter 32

**You all are amazing! It looks like you all want a few chapters and a third story… so that excites me I already have some ideas about it, but there will be a small wait between the end of this story and the start of the new one, seeing as I like to prewrite the beginning chapters.**

**Thanks to: melissamary55, TheOtherBella100, DenisseSchmidt, muzaklover, Cockerspanmom, christmastree, Sandra moore, sOulOv3, dr. meow123, iloveChiodosXD, katiesparks21, koleen05, dazzleglo, Music ADD, totes. Mah. Gotes, dowlingnana, rlwoods, clickchick18, shanese21, MaryMary123, KManzie (A sequel to the sequel if that makes sense haha), alc1002, Yummy Dummy, and Cici G. **

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

"Don't you have any qualms about illegally slitting someone's tires when your entire family is cops?"

"My mom's a stay at home mother. She cancels everyone else out." I smirked as Alice pulled up to the book store parking lot. The lot was almost empty and in full view of the bookstore. "And you can't _legally _slit someone's tires…" She shrugged.

"Which one is it?" I asked, Alice pointed to a raggedy looking Ford. "Maybe we should leave that alone. It's _fucked_ up." I shook my head and Alice just shook her head flipping open the blade.

"Fucker." She hissed before pushing her door open and getting out. I smirked and followed her lead, getting a rush from the _idea_ of tearing his shit up.

_I really need to get out more…_

"You don't have a knife do you?"

"Nope, I'm more of a gun person." I said lifting my pant leg slightly showing off the heat strapped to my ankle. I was always alert when we went to visit Riley. He was still a high priority case.

"You have a silencer?"

"No." She sighed and leaned in her car, flipping open the glove compartment and pulling out a smaller knife. "That should do it. You take the back." I nodded and we walked casually past the car, checking the windows for any signs of the owner. My head snapped towards Alice as the sudden rush of air caught my attention. She dragged the blade through the thick rubber easier than I thought possible.

"Get to it. She's coming." My eyes widened and I dug the thin knife into the tire, slitting a straight line down the side. The sound of a bell made me look towards the bookstore seeing an old lady hobble out slowly.

_She had a fucking walker._

"Wait a second. I thought you said a man did that!" I hissed across the car to Alice.

"Sorry Bella, we can't all have twenty-twenty vision."

"You told me it was a man!"

"She is not an _it _Bella. How inhumane of you." She whispered loudly.

"That's an elderly woman, dumbass!" I attempted to slap at her arm but missed, my fist denting the apparently thin metal of the side of the truck. "_Fuck._ That old bitch is going to _sue you_." I darted toward Alice's car. She was right on my tail, jumping into the car and starting it up quickly screeching out of the parking lot.

"What's wrong with you? Men and old women look nothing alike! I wouldn't have… if I knew it was a she…"

"What a double standard. You _disgust _me." She groaned, curling a lip.

"I'm never helping you slash tires again."

"Hey you can't blame this all on me. You jumped into the tire slashing without knowing all the details." I smacked her arm.

"You dick! I was trying to help you out! You said it was a dude that cracked your window."

"How sexist of you." She gasped.

"Okay now you're just bringing random shit up." She shrugged and skidded into the hospital parking lot. I touched the large crack in her window before realizing that she probably couldn't see a thing through that.

"Can you see through that?"

"Nope, I use my side mirrors and rearview mirrors and if I try, I can peak through that right there…" She ran her finger over a space that was about an inch wide. I shook my head and started towards the hospital.

"You think she'll bust you?"

"I'm not worried about her _busting _me. You're the one that slit her tires." I nodded at a nurse and she waived me back.

"Good friend. Good friend." She scoffed following me into Riley's room; I sat in Edwards lap and pulled his arms around my waist.

"Through thick and thin, darling." I looked around the room then, realizing that the mood was about ten times more somber than when I had left. Ellie sat on Riley's bed pouting while he gave her a tentative smile. I turned to Edward, "What's wrong?"

He shrugged, "We were talking about where Alec-" He looked past me at Riley, "I mean _Riley_- would go from here." I bit my lip. I hadn't put any thought into that. If his memory came back, like the nurse assumed it would, then I guess he'd go back to his home in New York.

"New York?" I said obviously.

"And if it doesn't come back?"

"New York?"

"We can't send _Riley Masen_ back to New York, Baby. He doesn't exist." I sighed and turned back around.

"Well we can worry about that later, we only have a little time before they kick us out." Riley groaned and restarted playing a hand game with Ellie.

"Watch out for those hands Riley, she isn't all that coordinated." Alice warned from the side of the bed, still not understanding that that slap during their game of patty cake wasn't accidental.

"_Stupid_." Ellie whispered under her breath.

"Alright everyone, we need to give Riley some more tests, he doesn't seem to be improving, which calls for more testing than usual." I looked sympathetically towards Alec who just shrugged.

"When will he be able to come home?"

"Once a certain amount of his memory comes back he can leave, unless you find it unnecessary for him to be here…" Well of course it wasn't necessary. He had no wounds he was just a bit clueless.

"Thank you," She nodded and I stood with Edward. "We'll be back for you tomorrow." I said before hugging Alec once more. We soon left the hospital, all of us –including Alice- piling into our car.

"Well… well… well. This has been a mighty _uneventful day. Right, _Bella." I whipped around in my seat.

"How hard are you _trying_ to push it?" She sunk into her seat with a snicker.

"You know what would make it interesting?" She said clapping happily. "Baby names!"

"Baby already has a name." Ellie said in a '_duh_' tone. "It's Baby."

"Actually it's Seth." Edward corrected with a roll of his eyes. "And she means the new baby, sweetheart."

"Name her after me. I mean, I'd be the only good influence in her life." Ellie boasted.

"I'm sorry I didn't realize you were just out on a lunch break for the rest of the week." Alice cocked her head to the side and Ellie slapped her thigh. "They can't have two kid's named Ellie anyway. You should name her Alice. After your _best friend_."

"Mommy, you don't have to name it-"

"Her." Alice piped in.

"We don't know that _it's_ a girl. Mommy said it takes a while to know. I see what she means. I mean, you wear a dress _but_…" Alice curled a lip and Ellie collapsed into laughter. "We'll never know. And _as I was saying_, you don't have to name her Ellie you can make her name _sound_ like mine. Like Emmalie. Or _Lucy_."

"The last thing they want is another you."

"They love me." I was about to agree when Alice cut me off.

"Think what you want." Ellie waived a hand in her face sassily.

"You know what _I_ think?" She said lowly.

"I think you need to put that hand down." Alice rolled her eyes and Ellie complied. Alice spoke to us again, "Or you could name it after Edward. Like… _Edward_." Edward shook his head.

"I wouldn't put another kid through that name." I grabbed his free hand.

"I like your name. We could always call him Eddie."

He scoffed, "The _hell _we could."

"Look at you being a bad influence, _Daddy._"

"We could name her a color. Like, Periwinkle. I like that color." I turned towards Alice again.

"You name _your_ kid Periwinkle and see how long it takes her to change it." She rolled her eyes and I turned back around, laying my head on Edwards shoulder.

"How about _Alexandria_? She can be a princess!" Ellie squealed. I had no idea she was into princesses, I would have thought she'd name the kid Tonka or some shit.

"You want to be a princess when you grow up?"

"Did I say me?" Ellie asked in exasperated tone.

"Depends on the circumstance." My jaw clenched at the pettiness of the argument and Edward stiffened.

"Okay, let's play the quiet game until we get home." He suggested, before counting down. "One, two… three… go!"

"I lose." Arose two voices from behind us, I groaned and Edward massaged my thigh. I watched his fingers move on my leg and with each stroke I grew… hungrier.

"Did I eat today?" I whispered to myself. We had just rushed out of the house this morning and I hadn't eaten. "Fuck…" My stomach growled loudly and the noise in the backseat seized. The car was silent for about all of three seconds before Ellie screamed.

"You farted you nasty!" There was a smack in the backseat and I shot up. My sudden movement caused my stomach to jolt and a bile rose in my throat.

"Pull over the car." Edward looked warily at me.

"Baby, we're in thick traffic, I can't." I covered my mouth and lurched over in my seat. Edward gasped and fumbled around below the driver's seat, reaching for an empty bag. About three minutes later I was violently sick while Edward rubbed my back and Ellie and Alice fought. As soon as possible Edward pulled over, jumping out and opening my door, pulling me out as well.

"Are you alright?" He asked as I leaned against the car. I nodded and he handed me a towel from god knows where. I looked at him skeptically before wiping my mouth with it. Once I was clean_er_ he pulled me into a hug. "You want me to make Alice walk." He tilted my face up, "Ellie can too."

"So that we can be called to the station for them disturbing the peace? I think not." He kissed my forehead with a smirk and moved to open the door next to mine.

"Alice, you're up front." He pulled me away from the car and I sagged against him. "God, what happened to you?"

"I don't know…" I knew exactly what the fuck it was though. The arguing, the lack of food, the hormones. But I wouldn't tell him that.

_I've got an image to uphold_. I snorted at myself. Maybe admitting my punkish feelings would improve my image.

But I digress.

"You want to get back in?" He asked once Alice had moved, I shook my head. My fucking pulse was racing and I couldn't calm myself down for the life of me, my stomach churned and I felt like I was going to pass out. Maybe I developed a car sickness…

"I need to eat… But right now I just kind of want to sit. So distract me?" He nodded.

"Maybe we should think about baby names." Edward said softly as he moved to the back of the car, pulling out two lawn chairs and letting down the windows, with a warning to everyone to stay quiet. He grabbed something from Seth's diaper bag before tossing me a can of mashed sweet potatoes.

"Am I supposed to eat this?" I asked, he shrugged.

"It's edible and you're hungry…"

"That's true…" I popped open the lid and scooped out some with my finger before returning to the subject. "Baby names… What do you think it will be?"

"Well I'd say a boy, because I was on top but we were both standing so that doesn't really work." I smacked his shoulder and he grinned. "I'm joking…"

"Whatever," I laughed softly, he pulled my chair closer to his and threw his arm over the back of it, I laid my head against his shoulder. "If she's a girl, then her name could be Emma, or what about Olivia?"

"I like Olivia." He nodded.

"Then Olivia." See, that didn't take a crap load of bickering.

"Um… Are you kidding me?" Alice leaned out of the window looking quite put out. "You can't just decide like that! You need debate a little argument. Hell it looks like Ellie and I care more about your kid than you do!"

"No, you're just immature. And we can decide like that! How do you think Seth got his name?" I said with a roll of my neck.

"There are so many names to explore! Brooke, Tara, Alana, Marissa, Lucy, Amber, Violet… I mean mother of hell! You don't want your kid to go around like 'Yep, my name was the first one Ma and Pa thought of' and then my kid would be like 'how second rate'." She scoffed.

"Alice please. We know you aren't allowed having children." Edward nodded looking over his shoulder.

"I mean look at what she did to Jasper. Have you heard him talk recently?" I nodded.

"Imagine that times four." We shook our heads and Alice growled.

"And if it's a boy! What then? You gonna' name him Olivia too?"

"Most likely." I shrugged and she threw a pen cap at my head.

"Hunter, Blake, Charlie, Andrew, Cameron, Daniel, Adam… You two are so lazy."

"Anthony?" I asked just to piss her off.

"Anthony." Edward agreed with a shrug.

"Ew, that's ugly!" Ellie screamed.

"It's Daddy's middle name."

Ellie pursed her lips and raised a brow, "Who does that shock? His first name is _Daddy_. They kind of named him to go nowhere in life."

…TEC…

**Hope you laughed and or enjoyed!**

**All of the names minus Periwinkle were picked out by you all by the way :D I'm still trying to think through them but there were so many good names.. agh.**

**I'm sorry I can't put a penname to these names but thank you for all of them! These are the ones that made it through cuts:**

**Girl: Olivia, Emma, Caroline, Sophia, Brooke, Tara, Alana, Abigail, Emmalie, Marissa, Violet, Lauren, Lucy, Amber, Alexandria (Ali or Alex)**

**Boy: Hunter, Blake, Charlie, Andrew, Edward, A(i)den, Damien, Erin, Cameron, Daniel (Danny), Darren, Brandon, Anthony, Adam, Chase, Matthew, Noah, Riley**

**Also if there is anything you want to see in the next part of (what seems to be) the Bella Swan-Masen trilogy, tell me about it! Plot ideas… characters… anything! I love hearing from you all and you never know what may pop up!**

**Thank you for your contribution and if you want to pick out of those names which ones you like the best be my guest just hit that review button!**

**P.S. I love the name Anthony. That was all Ellie haha**

**Let's make it to 825? For an update tomorrow!**


	34. Chapter 33

**Thanks to: Muzaklover, melissamary55, Yummy Dummy, Cockerspanmom, MaryMary123, Melnaugh, TorieMasen, sOulOve3, Kgunter34, Mrz. JasperHale4Ever, bearygirl, KManzie, dowlingnana, katiesparks21,, totes. Mah. Gotes, Cici G, DenisseSchmidt, alc1002, and dazzleglo. **

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

"I don't know… it's kind of small…" I said while peeking into Seth's room. It was just big enough for a nursery, but I don't think he'd want to stay in the room when he was older. Especially when we have larger bedrooms. Edward wrapped his arms around my waist resting his head on my shoulder.

"We can just move him into Riley's room. We can keep the furniture and everything." I rolled my eyes.

"He's going to need _kid stuff_ like a racecar bed and whatnot."

"I never had a racecar bed." I shrugged and moved into the room, he shuffled along awkwardly behind me.

"Sucks for you." His hands drifted to my stomach and he kissed my neck.

"Have you eaten today?"

"You forget _one time_…" I whispered to myself, before nodding. "Yes, Edward. We all ate together, remember?"

"Oh yeah. So you want Seth in Riley's room?"

I shook my head, "We should put him into the other guestroom..." I bit my lip.

"You just said Riley's room was boyish."

"Yeah, but it's _Riley's_ room."

"You mean it _was_ his room." I had called the hospital the day before so they could start Alec's release forms. But for him to be released he had to stay close to the facility, for routine checkups. It wasn't that big of a deal now. He didn't have someone chasing his ass anymore, he should be fine.

He groaned moving away from me, "What did you do?"

"He's being released later today... I just told the hospital that he'd be with us. Here." I shrugged. "No biggie."

"Um, biggie. I thought you didn't want him here. You _left_ because Riley was here." I rolled my eyes.

"Were you out of it that week or something? I left because this-" I gestured around the room in regards to the house. "wasn't a safe environment. But now that all of those asses are in jail, it's safe. I mean I have nothing against Alec so…" I fumbled around with the stuff on Seth's changing table absent mindedly.

"So he _is _going to be staying with us?" He asked slowly, I nodded and he groaned again.

"Oh man up. You'll be fine. He's stayed with us since November; him coming back won't kill you."

He pointed at me, "You don't know that." I pushed down his finger and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"But I do. You'll be fine." I repeated. He ignored it and his eyes flicked from my eyes to my lips, before he leaned down.

I leaned back dodging his lips, "Riley can stay?"

"You aren't going to listen to me if I say no." I shook my head and pressed a kiss to his lips before snagging his keys from his back pocket.

"We'll be back soon!" I called over my shoulder before leaving the room.

"Mama!" Seth screamed when I came into his view.

"Hi, Baby." Ellie sat up on the couch behind him, with a raised eyebrow.

"I thought you said his name wasn't baby."

"I thought I said you had to read quietly for thirty minutes." She huffed and laid back down with her book. I took the steps two by two, excited to go and bust Riley out.

"Go Mama?" Seth asked when I passed by him, I turned at the sound of his voice and he stood in his playpen with his arms out. I smiled at him and pulled him into my arms, propping him up on my hip.

"Can I go, Mommy?" Ellie asked from over the back of the couch, only her wide green eyes visible. I was torn. I didn't want her to feel like Seth came before her… but she was also suspended earlier in the week…

"No. You need to read."

"I can read in the car."

"You're on punishment Elizabeth."

She sighed and dropped down, "You didn't have to whole name me, _mother_." I rolled my eyes and snickered quietly before putting on both my coat and Seth's.

"Edward! I'm taking Seth with me!" I screamed up to the second floor. Who cares if it's country? What would I look like walking all the way up some steps to yell what I could from my spot at the door?

"Okay. Love you."

"Love you too! Bye, pumpkin." I pecked Ellie's forehead before leaving the house and heading towards the hospital.

"Mama?" Seth said loudly from the backseat.

"Hmm?" He pointed to the diaper bag at his feet and I reached behind myself to get a sippy cup, handing it to him cautiously.

"Oh shit." I said slamming onto my brake as I rapidly approached a stop sign. I made the car screeched to a halt and a cup of juice without a top flew past my head and hit my windshield.

"Uh oh." He said softly with wide eyes. I frowned and felt the orange liquid seep through my coat and pants. I closed my eyes tightly and pushed my hair away from my shoulder, before examining the damage to my white coat. My entire stomach was soaked as were the tops of my jeans. I didn't even know I put that much juice into that mother fucking cup. I pressed onto the gas softly, only a turn away from my desired location.

"Are you okay, honey?" I asked meeting Seth's eyes in my rearview mirror.

"Yeah." He bit his little lip, his cheeks stained red. I quickly parked and everything before stepping out to get Seth, when I opened the back door he was crying softly, his hands over his mouth.

"Don't cry, sweetheart." I coo'ed sitting in the backseat next to him and kissing his forehead. "You're okay." I unbuckled him and pulled him into my lap, whipping his tears.

"I sorry, Mama…" He pressed his little head into my neck and I cradled him in my arms.

"No, no… It was Mommy's fault, sweetie." He sat back and looked me in the eye bashfully. I reached down and grabbed his hand pressing a kiss to it before noticing the blood on it. "Oh shit. Honey, open your mouth?" He nodded and his lips spread into an 'o'. The inside of his lip was bleeding and I searched for the reason, finding two teeth being the culprit. I childishly reached into his mouth touching the new teeth excitedly.

"Look at my big boy! You have teeth!" I whined obnoxiously in my 'Seth only' voice, which sounded more like a drag queen on helium than a toddler. He found it interesting though. I reached into the diaper bag at my feet and pulled out a cloth, dabbing his lip gently, and restarting the water works.

"It's okay, honey." I said softly, kissing his forehead and standing from the car to retrieve his stroller. A few minutes and a slightly bloodied towel later, we were entering the hospital. Looking like we'd been through a tornado.

A tornado of orange juice.

But a tornado no less.

"Mrs. Masen!" The usual overly cheery nurse greeted.

"Hi, Angela."

"Riley has been moved, um…" She turned and looked for another nurse snapping her fingers at a mane of wild red hair. Angela turned back to me, "Vicki will take you to him." She handed the chart to the woman and pushed her towards me.

"Oh hey!" She smiled.

"Hi Victoria, how are you?" We started walking towards Riley's new room.

"Fine, and you and your husband and-" She cleared her throat, looking down at Seth with wide eyes. "_children_." I smirked and pulled off my stained coat, showing off my Baby Maker sweater by accident.

"Oh haha that's pretty funny…" She said awkwardly as her eyes drifted across my chest. "How many kids _do_ you have?" Seth waved from the stroller and I smiled down at him.

"Two and a half." I patted my slightly flat stomach and she furrowed her thin eyebrows. "The rest weren't mine, just my daughter's friends." I cleared up, knowing that from the previous month she probably assumed I had around twelve kids, instead of three. She nodded and showed me into an open room, where Riley sat surrounded by a million other sick people. I raised an eyebrow.

_Now what the fuck was this?_

"Why isn't he in a room?" I said as he stood and made his way towards me.

"Bella calm down, I told them you were coming and they let me stay in here." He said wrapping an arm around my shoulder in a half hug. Victoria nodded furiously as I flushed angrily.

"Okay…" I said unbelievingly. "What do I have to sign?"

"You just have to sign a form that says he'll stay with you." I nodded and she handed me the clip board that was previously tucked underneath her arm. I signed it quickly before showing Riley to the car.

"What happened to this little guy?" He asked once I lifted Seth into his seat.

"We had a bit of an accident on the way down, he's alright though; just bit his lip a little." I swept a finger over the uncut part of my youngest's lip and kissed his forehead before taking my seat next to Alec. He raised an eyebrow at me as he held up the empty sippy cup.

"Don't judge me." He snorted and I started up the car, and noticed he was still focused on the side of my face. I smiled awkwardly and cast a side glance at him. "What?" His head snapped forward and my stomach sank.

_Not this shit again._

He blushed, and cleared his throat. "I was just thinking… Well- never mind."

"Spit it out, child."

He chuckled, "Um, do I have any baby momma's out in the world? I mean, no one else has come to visit… so…" I laughed at his question.

"Actually you do, remember Alice?" Yeah, I was still just a bit mad about the headache that she was.

"She's married. I met her husband…"

"What does that mean?" I lifted my eyebrows and his face paled. "And you're really my sister in law?" I nodded slowly. Reminding myself that he now truly was Riley Masen, without his memory.

"Yep."

"Married to my brother."

"_Yep._" The tension in this car was almost suffocating.

"Who I'm supposed to _love_."

"You are _family_."

"Making you my _sister_."

"In-law." He shook his head and slumped into his seat and I felt bad for him.

_If only I weren't so damn irresistible._

The rest of the ride was slightly awkward until we pulled up to the house.

"I'm staying with you two?" I nodded and stepped out of the car. He sounded a little bit too happy.

"Yeah."

"Cool." He said in an attempt to sound nonchalant. I cast a wary glance his way and he sent me a fake ass smile. He grabbed his bag and Seth's before heading into the house behind me. Edward met us at the door, relieving Riley slightly.

"How are you, man?" He asked, looking Riley in the eye. I sat on the steps behind them and undid Seth's coat.

"Fine and you?" Their gaze broke and Riley's eyes drifted towards me.

"Great." Edward stepped in Riley's line of sight. "What's up, _bro_?" He asked using Jasper's new favorite word.

"Um, nothing." Riley said softly, "I'm just going to head up to my room." He nodded and moved past Edward.

"I'll show you up." Edward said with a pointed look in my direction. I rolled my eyes and stood letting Riley pass before grabbing Edwards arm.

"He's harmless."

He smirked, "Oh I know, I'm just making sure it stays that way." He pressed a kiss to my lips before heading up after his 'brother'. Ellie came around the corner with a red imprint on her cheek.

"What the hell happened to you?" I asked setting down Seth and dropping down to my knees to examine the mark. She yawned and shook her head clutching the book to her chest tiredly.

There was a tell-tale mark of a corner from a book on her cheek and I chuckled. "I said _read it._ Not sleep on it."

She shrugged and wrapped her arms around my neck, "Will you take me upstairs?"

"I don't know, I think Daddy is asserting his authority right now… you might not want to be up there." Edward and Riley appeared in the hallway, both of them walking in silence. Riley looked embarrassed and Edward look like he didn't give a fuck.

"I think he's done. Hey, Uncle Riley!" She left my embrace and narrowly dodged Seth on the way up to hug her 'uncle'.

"Hey, kid." The three of them made their way down to the foot of the steps.

Edward picked up Seth and placed an affectionate kiss on his forehead before looking at his slightly swollen lip. "What happened here?"

"Open your mouth, honey." Edward lifted an eyebrow and did so. "Not you, jackass." I smirked and turned to Seth lightly tapping his cheek, so he'd open his mouth. "Look." I pointed at his tooth.

"What the hell happened to his lip?"

"He bit it." I tapped the incoming teeth softly and Edward smiled.

"Look at that." He tilted up Seth's head and examined his little mouth. I turned to see Ellie talking Riley's ear off, his gaze focused on me. I gave an awkward wave that made Edward clear his throat and Riley look away in embarrassment.

We all stood in silence before Ellie graced us with her outside voice, "I'm bored." She grabbed Edward and Riley's hands pulling them down the hall. "Mommy we're going to play in the snow. Make us some sandwiches will ya' toots?" She winked at me and made to head out of the door.

"Of course, dear. Anything else?"

"Coat me, Mama." I slipped her arms through the bright pink coat and flipped up the hood, pulling the drawstrings tightly.

"Mommy, it's on backwards."

"Bye, toots." I gave her a little push towards Edward who was about a foot away; she stumbled into his arms and he undid her coat with a smile.

"Have fun." I picked up Seth and moved towards the kitchen. "Want to make cookies with Mommy?" He squealed and clapped.

"I'm going to kick your butt in the snowball fight, Riley." Ellie boasted as she fixed her coat.

"This is so backwards…" Edward gave me a torn look, debating on sending Ellie in with me to bake so he could take Seth out and bury him in snow.

"Bye, Edward." I said turning and entering the kitchen with Seth on my hip. He kicked and I set him on the ground so that he could practice walking and I could start baking. I was pretty proud of myself. Since my little baking fiasco's with Leah I had actually gotten decent at the art of baking.

I had been moving around the kitchen for all of about five minutes before Seth wandered into the front room. He had been walking a lot more lately. And he did it with pants on, which I was elated about. I was checking up on Seth when the door behind me opened and someone stomped on the mat, heavily. There was a large hand on my waist soon after the stomping. I covered the hand with my own before realizing it wasn't Edwards.

"Riley, what are you doing?" I gasped as he spun me around. "Riley?" He was flushed and breathing heavily, his blue eyes glowing with curiosity.

_I wonder if he got the memo that that killed the fucking bird._

_Wait that wasn't right._

He interrupted my obviously intelligent inner musings. "There is a reason I remember you, Bella." He said before brushing my hair over my shoulder, I pulled back only to run into the counter. I was honestly over this bullshit. It'd happened before and the last thing I needed was a repeat performance.

"Okay, look. You need to back up. Because this is just too mu-" His lips descended on mine and my eyes widened, his lips were awkward and foreign after two and a half years of kissing the same person. He tried to deepen the wretched kiss and I was fucking livid. I pushed his shoulders and he didn't budge. I went to knee him where no one wants to be kneed and realized I was too fucking close to that mother fucking counter. My hands went to his neck and I felt around for that fucking pressure point and just when I thought I was fucked, he dropped.

_Harmless, my ass._

"You, dumbass!" I screamed. I wiped my mouth hurriedly and Seth ran into the room. I grabbed his arm before he slid into a counter due to his frictionless socks.

_How does she do it?_

"Tank, Mama." He said softly, looking down at Riley. He sat up rubbing his head and I hoped he had a concussion, to counter act the mother fucking first one that gave him the amnesiac'ed balls to fucking _kiss me._

_A __**married **__woman._

I don't get worked up to this level too easily but there were few things in this world that I fiercely cared for and was protective of:

My family and my marriage.

The person that fucks with either better _watch their ass_.

"Well that was a little much." He said before standing. "A simple no would have worked."

"How the _fuck _was I supposed to say 'no' while you were fucking glued to me, you fuck?"

"Language much?"

"What in the hell made you think you could kiss me? Are you trying to get yourself fucked up?" He moved towards me and I held up a fist.

"Bella, there is obviously a reason I remembered you. I didn't know if we were…" He gestured between us.

"No. We fucking weren't-" I made the same pointing gesture and slapped his shoulder. "I'm _married_." I was going to end there but he fucking _kissed _me. He deserved a guilt trip. "To your brother!"

"Spouses cheat with siblings all the time." I cocked a hip and put my hand on it.

"If you're so _fucking_ smart, then why the hell would you try anything with me? My goodness, are you stupid?"

"It's just a kiss. Over react much?" He frowned and threw up his hands. "I didn't know! You were talking about your half baby-" he pointed at my stomach.

"I'm _married_!" I repeated incredulously. "That was the first thing we talked about when I first saw you!"

"When I asked about my baby mama you said marriage didn't mean anything…"

"We were talking about Alice!"

"Double meaning."

"And I was joking anyway!" Our conversation had quickly escalated to us screaming at the top of our lungs.

"That's not funny. What is your issue?"

"_My_ issue?" I yelled, pointing at myself. "_My fucking issue?_ You're the one going around kissing married women you _dick_!" I pushed his chest and the door opened again Edward came in with a giggling Ellie over his shoulder. I glared at Riley who leveled my stare. I looked down at Seth who was covering his ears with wide eyes. I wiped my mouth self-consciously and felt terrible as I watched Edward and Ellie. There was a burning sensation in my stomach and I gave Riley one last glare before leaving the room, and storming into the bathroom. I lurched over the toilet violently and emptied my stomach. There was a flood of footsteps behind me before there were multiple hands holding back my hair.

"Mommy?" Ellie said her voice close to my ear.

"What happened? She hasn't gotten sick like this in a while." Edward's concerned voice asked as he gathered my hair fluidly.

"The baby must not agree with raw cookie dough…" Riley's voice was hard as he spoke; tones of anger laced his words. Tears slipped down my cheeks as I hurled into the porcelain bowl. About five minutes of chaos I sat up, and took the towel Edward held out for me. I stood quietly, and Edward's hands fluttered around me trying to see what he could do to help. But I didn't need any help in that moment.

I turned to Riley and pulled my fist back before sending it flying into his jaw.

_Cookie dough, my ass._

…TEC…

**Oh shit…**

**I said a few more chapters… I hope you didn't expect them to be mindless and boring :D**

**845? For an update tomorrow?**


	35. Chapter 34

**Thanks to: Kayla, Music ADD, dr. meow1234, Yummy dummy, Melnaugh, stacy924, muzaklover, puss-is-in-boots, TorieMasen, KManzie, katiesparks21, sOulOv3, Cici G, totes. Mah. Gotes, Mrz. JasperHale4Ever, aviator gal, rlwoods, DenisseSchmidt, dazzleglo, shanese21, dowlingnana, mcur461, melissamary55, Cockerspanmom, clickchick18, alc1002, and luv2dance. Thank you all! You are too amazing for words!**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC..

Turns out I missed and connected with his nose instead.

"Holy fuck, Bella!" Edward screamed as he moved to help Riley who was nursing a bloodied nose. I coughed into my towel and moved around them, leaving the bathroom.

Little footsteps followed after me and then Ellie was in front of me. "Um, Mommy?"

"Wait one second." I went to the nearest bathroom brushing my teeth with one of the toothbrushes that we kept in every bathroom for occasions like this.

The puking. Not the fucking Riley up part.

_That was just a bonus. _

"You want to help me finish the cookies?" She nodded and followed me into the kitchen, holding my hand tightly.

"So..." she looked up at me slyly with a smirk. "You should, uh, you know... do that more often."

I smirked and shook my head in amusement, "I will, if you promise not to."

She looked conflicted before agreeing. "Deal." I smiled before packing a little bit more cookie dough into little balls.

"Bella, what was that all about?" Edward asked as he rounded the corner passing me, to throw the bloodied towel into the laundry room.

This is why I invited Ellie to make cookies. She doesn't ask questions.

"We can talk about it later." I said over my shoulder. Two hands appeared on either side of mine, on the counter and I tensed as he leaned in to me. I was still just a little worked up over the Riley thing.

"Why don't you tell me now?" He asked in my ear.

"Because if you don't leave me alone about it, you're next." I said turning my head so that I could look him in the eye. His eyebrows lifted and I sighed.

_This was not going to be good._

"Bella." He whispered.

"Don't forget. There are children in the room." Ellie reminded from next to me.

"Yep. Children." I motioned jerkily to Ellie and Edward sighed, pushing off of the counter and going back to Riley.

"Mommy, if you don't want to tell Daddy I will." My eyes widened and I looked to Ellie.

"You know what happened?"

"No. You can tell me if you want…" She explained.

"Just work on the cookies, okay?" She shrugged and nodded. Seth waddled on into the kitchen looking pretty proud of himself.

"Hi, honey." I picked him up and kissed his cheek. He laid his head on my shoulder and stuck his thumb in his mouth. "Mommy's little piece of sanity." I whispered to myself before wrapping my free arm around Ellie. "Both of you." She smiled up at me and I leaned down to peck her warm cheek. When I crouched down, Seth reached out and slapped the cookie tray, knocking all of the cookie's that I'd spent what felt like hours on, tumbled to the ground.

"Ah… shit." I groaned as I took in all of the cookie dough splattered on the floor.

"Well, looks like we'll be having a cleaning party." I said unenthusiastically, Seth shook his head and rested it against my shoulder sleepily.

"Sweep, Mama." He said loudly in my ear before closing his eyes and faking sleep. I rolled my eyes and gathered all of the dough I could.

"Feel free to help, Ellie." I said with a smirk in her direction.

Larger hands pushed me away, "I've got it." Riley said softly as he scooped up the dough.

"What are you doing?" I gritted out as I slapped his hands away.

"I'm making amends, Bella." He said trying to meet my eyes. I shook my head and focused on the cookie's.

"Well… don't." I snapped. I was so tired of his shit, it wasn't even funny. He put his finger under my chin and tilted my head up so that my eyes met his. "Don't fucking touch me." His left eye was swollen and his nose was slightly crooked.

"Bella-"

"No." I looked up to Ellie who was looking upon our interaction with obvious interest tinged with hope. Not that normal, happy, kid hope. But that '_I_ _want to see my Mommy make my grown uncle cry like a bitch' _look. "Ellie go upstairs… or to the front room." She sighed and grabbed Seth's hand pulling him after her. "Be careful." I shook my head and turned back to Riley whose hand was still suspended in mid-air. I smacked away his hand and yet he moved closer to me.

"Bella. Tell me something, tell me you didn't feel anything." He dared, his eyes piercing mine.

"I'll tell you a few things." I said standing up, over him. "First of all, no, I didn't feel shit. So you can stop. Second, I'm married. Why don't you get that?" I shook my head and picked up the gathered dough, depositing it in the trash can. "Oh and lastly," He stood and came closer. "If you even try to kiss me again I will fuck you up." He smirked and leaned into me.

"Wouldn't dream of it," I glared at him and his lips quirked into a satisfied grin. A throat cleared from the doorway and Edward stood with his arms crossed tightly over his chest. I cleared my throat as well and Riley stepped backwards, almost looking appropriately ashamed as he stared at the ground.

"You fucking, ass." I growled at Riley before moving away from him, I looked up at Edward, "Hey, Baby."

"I'm going to put the kids to bed, and then turn in. Are you alright down here?" He spoke to me but his eyes were trained on Riley. I nodded and rubbed the back of my neck. It was kind of Edward's right, as my husband, to know about the kiss… But I'd rather handle it myself, keep him from getting hurt or pissed or whatever. He moved gracefully across the kitchen and pulled me into his arms fusing my lips to his and weaving his fingers into my hair. His hand slipped into my back pocket and I groaned into his mouth, and tried to keep myself from humping his leg. We did have company after all.

He pulled away, leaving me breathless. "Night."

"Good night." He pecked my lips once more before glaring at Riley.

"Watch yourself, kid." He warned, obviously referring to our proximity earlier. I bit my lip, staring at my husband, and rubbed my thighs together.

_So damn sexy._

His eyes met mine and he gave me a warning look with a flick of his eyes at Riley.

"The kids are in the front room, Baby." I said quietly before turning and picking up the cookie sheet. Edward left the room and Riley turned to look at me.

"That was a little much…" I clenched my jaw and he snorted.

"You didn't have to watch." I said to the cookie sheet.

"He's so _possessive_ that doesn't bother you?" He asked as he inched his ass closer to me.

"No, and he isn't that possessive, you ass. You're just all up in my shit. He noticed."

He scoffed, "Whatever. I could do better than that anyway."

_Doubt it._

"Congratulations." He moved closer and our hips were touching. I jumped away from him and grabbed a pan from the strainer. "I _swear_ I will fuck you up. Do not tempt me." He looked as though he didn't believe me, obviously ignoring the fact that his nose was probably broken.

"I don't understand…"

"Obviously."

"Why not me?" I curled a lip.

"I _love_, Edward." I explained, tapping the pan against my palm to accentuate my point. "You _piss me off._"

"If I piss you off so much then why'd you agree to let me stay here?"

"We've had this conversation. Bye, Riley." I dismissed with a wave of my hand.

"You didn't even give me a fucking chance." He got in my face and was breathing hard as he spoke. He grabbed the pan from my hand and dropped it behind him, it clanged to the ground loudly and I gasped. He was worse than fucking Newton. He put his hands on my hips and lifted me onto the counter. I panicked and my palm shot out and I kind of _smushed_ his face…

He grabbed my hand and pinned it to the counter, "You are getting really fucking rape-y, Riley."

"Just… give me a chance."

"No. No. Back the fuck up." I was pretty kick ass if I did say so myself, but I honestly was no fucking match for a much stronger, younger man. Especially one that had me fucking pinned down.

"One. Just one." He leaned forward again, squeezing between my knees.

"This Is getting fucking ridiculous. Didn't you learn the first time? You know, the first time that you were trying to _make amends_ for?"

He smirked, "I guess not." He leaned in to kiss me again and I pulled back until my head hit the cabinet. I turned my head to the side to avoid his kiss and he laid an open mouthed kiss on my jaw. I shut my eyes tightly and struggled against his hands.

"What the fuck is this?" Edward roared from the doorway, Riley's eyes widened and Edwards arm wrapped around his neck before he threw him to the ground. "Go upstairs." He ordered after glancing at me.

"Edward," He glared at me and I moved off of the counter and towards the door, not quite leaving the room.

"Get up," He growled at Riley, who stood coughing. "We take you in and you try and get with my _wife_?" He threw a punch that connected with Riley's jaw, sending him back a few steps.

"Look, man. I'm sorry…" He wheezed.

"I don't fucking care." He said lowly, his back flexed and he threw another punch.

"Edward, I don't want to fight."

"And I don't want your fucking hands on my wife. Looks like we both lose." He jabbed him in the ribs and Riley grunted and threw one back.

"You don't even know what was going on." Riley said as they moved away from each other and went around in circles. "How do you know you're beloved _wife_ didn't start it. I am younger, maybe she wanted something fresh." They jumped at each other and I balled my fists at my side.

"Fuck that." I spat.

"Bella, I told you to go the fuck up stairs." Edward said angrily, his eyes flicked to mine and they were filled with nothing but hate. I gasped and moved backwards, I hadn't ever been on the receiving end of a look nearly as harsh as that one.

"Trouble in paradise?" Riley asked with a lifted brow. Edward's leg shot out and he knocked Riley off of his feet. Edward's back glistened with a bit of sweat, as he moved lithely around the younger man. If I wasn't so fucking mad at Riley I probably would have been turned on. Never mind.

_Don't judge. My husband's sexy just didn't stop. I can't help falling victim to him._

"Edward, he's not worth it." Riley was in terrible shape and Edwards hands couldn't have been doing too well either.

"Shut the fuck up." I gasped and he lunged at Riley once more.

"Think about it, Edward." Riley panted as he struggled to block himself from Edward's blows. "If she didn't want me all over her why would she come back for seconds?" Edward punched him square in the mouth before standing and opening up the side door, a gush of cold air blew through it.

"Get the fuck out of my house." Riley groaned and spit out some blood on my floor before grabbing his coat off of the rack next to the door, where he'd left earlier after coming in from the snow, and shrugging it on. He left the house and slammed the door behind him. Edward leaned against the door and breathed heavily, I stayed quiet on the other side of the kitchen.

"_Seconds._" He hissed, before pushing off of the door and coming toward me, I held my breath as his eyes met mine and he brushed past me without a word. I clutched my stomach and began feeling sick again. My eyes filled with tears as I turned to go up the stairs after him. When I reached our room he was in front of the bathroom mirror, washing his hand of in the sink, the water tinged red from where his wedding ring had chaffed his finger. The ring lay off to the side of the sink.

"Fuck." He hissed as he put soap on the cut. I shook my head and moved into the bathroom. His eyes followed me from the mirror as I pulled a bottle of rubbing alcohol from the cabinet. I went to his side and pulled a cotton ball from the jar on the sink, dousing it with alcohol. I pressed the cotton to his finger and he hissed jerking his hand away from me.

"I'm sorry." He said quietly as I rubbed the gash. "I shouldn't have spoken to you like that."

I huffed, "Yeah." He pulled his hand from mine and glared at me. "I mean, its okay…" I looked up into his eyes and all I could see was pain. My own eyes teared up as I looked into his. "I didn't start that…" He moved away from the sink and ignored me, leaving the room. I followed after him and my stomach ached at his rejection.

"Baby…" I whispered, crawling across the bed to where he was sitting.

"What exactly was that then?" He gritted out, his jaw ticked.

"He-" I gestured around me at a loss for words. "attacked… me."

"Really? Twice?"

"Yeah."

"Bella, I'm not fucking stupid. You're telling me that that was the second time he'd done something like that and you just let it happen?"

"I didn't _let_ it happen. He was holding me down!" My eyes widened as he shook his head.

"Really?" He said unbelievingly. "Why didn't you tell me the first time?"

"I don't need you to fight my battles." I explained, he scoffed. "I broke his nose; I think I did pretty well, myself." He turned and met my eyes. "I wasn't planning on it happening again." He stood from the bed and went towards the door; I jumped up after him and grabbed his arm.

"Where are you going?"

"I think I'll sleep on the couch tonight."

"No. Damn it. Just _listen_ to me!" Tears fell down my cheek at this point and his entire demeanor softened. "I was _not_ willingly kissing him! I wouldn't do that to you, you know this." His entire face lost its hardness and he just looked heart broken.

This was why I didn't tell him. Everything I tried to avoid happened. I didn't want him hurt or to feel betrayed. Yet he ended up being both of those.

"Baby, I'm sorry." I whispered cupping his cheek; he closed his eyes and shook his head. "Come here." I pressed my lips to his and he was still under my touch. "Edward, please…" I mumbled against his lips.

"That's fucked up, Bella." He whispered back, his voice sounding weak. I nodded and wrapped my arms around his neck, hugging him tightly, after a while his arms wrapped around my waist.

"I wouldn't do that to you, Edward. Not on purpose." I kissed him and he responded gently. "I love you." I reminded, he nodded.

"I love you too." He bent down and picked me up, cupping my ass as I wrapped my legs around his waist. He pushed me against the nearest wall and buried his face in my neck. I was suddenly overwhelmed with need and lust, as hugged me to him.

"Edward, please… I just… I need you right now." I whispered pathetically, as he pushed me against the wall. His mouth fused with mine, his lips crashing roughly against my own. I ran my hands down his back, feeling the muscles there tense with the effort he was using to hold me up. He pinned me to the wall with his hips for a second while he made quick work of my shirt. My lower stomach clenched with need as he rocked into me, quickly becoming hard against my warmth. He flicked the front clasp of my bra apart easily and kissed his way down my chest.

His hands fell back to my ass before he carried me over to the bed, laying me down gently. I discarded my bra and he worked on my pants, making me lift my hips so that he could pull the fabric from my body. When I was completely naked he looked over my body with a guttural groan and palmed his dick through his sweatpants. My pussy fucking quivered at the sight and I moaned wantonly. He dropped to his knees and ran his hands up my thighs, his fingertips barely grazing where I needed him the most. He leaned forward and licked the outside of my lower lips greedily. His warm breath washed over my wetness as he inserted two fingers into my drenched heat.

"So fucking wet." He moaned, before running his tongue up my slit, spending time circling my clit. I writhed against his face as it all became too much. "That better be for me." His eyes met mine and I nodded reverently, just wanting him to fuck me already.

"This is mine." He slipped up my body and ran two fingers along the inside of my pussy, teasing my clit with his thumb. "Baby, you're so fucking sexy." He murmured before taking my bottom lip between his own and biting down on it.

"Ah…" I moaned loudly as he teased me, He kissed back down my neck before paying attention to my nipples. He licked and blew on them until they were stiff and begging for his attention. He alternately twirled his tongue around both of them before biting down on my aching red peaks.

"God, Baby." He whispered before lining himself up at my entrance, he thrust into me lithely. "That pussy…" He moaned before sliding deeper, I gasped at his words enjoying his talking a little more than I probably should have been. I pushed his shoulder so that he'd roll over and let me ride him.

"Yes…" He groaned at the change of position, it allowed him to go deeper. I bounced on his cock rapidly, trying to acquire friction.

"Edward…" I breathed in his ear. His hands found my hips and he guided me on his dick. His mouth laid sweet open mouthed kisses on my neck as I rode him slowly. Tears filled my eyes as he brought me closer towards my climax, the weight of our earlier situation crashing down on me.

I pulled his bruised hand up to my lips, laying kisses along the flesh. "Shh…" He whispered softly, I clutched at his back, as his hips slapped into mine. He whispered sweet assuring nothings into my ear and I cried into his neck.

Ashamed.

Ashamed at how far the situation had gotten, and how much I'd hurt him.

He trailed his lips up my neck and reached between us, massaging my clit. His hand stopped long enough for us to shift into missionary as he picked up his pace a bit. One of his hands was bracing himself and the other cupped my cheek, swiping away the tears gently.

He leaned into me, our chest flush together. "Don't cry baby." He pressed a sweet slow kiss to my lips before looking down to where we were joined.

"I'm so sorry."

He shook his head, slowing inside of me so that I felt every inch of him slide against my walls sending us both over the edge.

…TEC…

I woke up feeling like shit.

My hips hurt and my mouth was dry. I opened my eyes to see Edward sleeping peacefully next to me, in all of his naked glory. His morning wood pressed against my leg and I reached down to stroke it. Edward had just started to stir from my ministrations when the bedroom door shot open and Ellie darted in. I pulled the covers over us, hoping like hell that the darkness in from the room covered us. I tucked the comforter underneath my armpits and sat up, opening my arms for Ellie to jump into.

"What's wrong, Honey? Bad dream?" I whispered as she snuggled into my chest. She smiled softly and laid her head against my neck.

"No."

"Then what happened?"

"Couldn't sleep. I got bored." I rolled my eyes above her head. I looked to the clock.

3:03.

Looks like I started a trend.

"You got bored? We didn't you turn on the T.V?"

"Um… because the only thing on was Girls Gone Wild commercials. People get shows for the stupidest things now." She frowned. "The one guy was like _dahlin take of your shirt _and the girl was like _no_. But she'd do it anyway. Dumb bimbo."

_Bimbo. That's a new word to add to her excessive vocabulary of words she wasn't supposed to be saying._

"Ellie…" I shook my head.

"She really was Mommy. But not like Alice bimbo. Like, worse than that." She explained.

"Where'd you hear bimbo?"

"Seth."

"I doubt it."

"No really you should be worried about that one. Bad seed, Mommy." I rolled my eyes and leaned back against my head board. She peeked over my arm at Edward, who had turned over onto his stomach; I pulled the covers up again to make sure his turn hadn't disturbed the comforter. "Are you and Daddy still mad at each other?" I shook my head. "That's good." I nodded and laid my head against the top of hers. "I don't like when you fight."

"I'm sorry." I said sincerely. She nodded and snuggled in closer to me. The phone on my nightstand rang and Ellie answered it.

"Hello?"

"Ellie hand me the phone."

"Ellie?" My brothers deep voice boomed from the other end of the speaker.

"Hey, Uncle Em." I grabbed the phone and held it to my ear.

"What's up, Emmett?"

"Looks like your newest boy toy took some shit from the husband." My eyes widened.

"He's there?"

"Yup. Just so I know, should I fuck him up while he's here, too? Are you hurt or something?"

"No, he kissed me and Edward didn't really appreciate that so…" He hummed over the phone.

"Oh, that sucks." He sounded distracted and there was an echoed '_No'_ moaned in the background.

"Emmett… what are you doing?"

"You know those Girls Gone Wild infomercials?"

"Yes."

"They're pretty hot." I furrowed my eyebrows. "I mean I know they have stars over the good part and stuff but…"

"Don't forget who you're talking to, Emmett." I groaned.

"Will you wake Edward up for me then?" Edward groaned in his sleep and I smiled, before running my hand through his hair.

"No. Bye, Emmett." I turned off the phone and placed it back into its cradle. Ellie had fallen asleep in my arms during my conversation and I bit my lip. I shook Edward, patting his shoulder.

"Mmm… what?"

"Can you take Ellie to her room?"

"What?" He opened an eye and shot up. "When did she get in here?"

"Calm down, she didn't see anything." I smirked, "Put on some pants." He stood and I angled our sleeping daughter away from him in case she woke up during his changing process. After putting on a pair of sweatpants he took her from my arms. When he re-entered the room sans Ellie, I was dressing. He approached me from behind and laid his hands over my slightly swollen abdomen. I wasn't quite far enough in my pregnancy to 'show', being at the last few weeks of my first trimester but there was definitely something in there, I was bigger than I'd been with Seth.

"I really am sorry about last night." He said softly kissing down my neck, his hand trailed up my abdomen and he groped my breast.

"Me too." He nodded and I wrapped an arm around his neck, threading my fingers into his hair. He ran his hand across my stomach once more.

"When's your next doctor's appointment? Soon right?" He asked, his eyebrows furrowing as he felt up my stomach.

"Tomorrow… or today, I guess. Why?" He shrugged.

"You're getting a lot bigger sooner than you did with Seth." I looked down at my stomach and tried not to focus on him calling me fat. "Wait, that's not what I meant-" I nodded and smiled at him before pecking his lips.

"I know." The phone rang again and I wondered why the fuck no one was sleeping these days. Edward leaned over me to pick it up.

"Hello?" He sat on the bed and pulled me into his lap. "What's up man?" There was a long pause and a whole bunch of slurring from the other end before Edward handed me the phone.

"Who is it?" I asked him, he just shrugged. "Hello?"

"Bella!" Jasper sounded ecstatic.

"What?"

"Alice wanted me to call you." There was a shit load of ruckus in the background and I could barely hear him.

"Why?" It sounded like a fucking tornado on his end and then Alice was screeching into the phone.

"Hello?" She on the other hand didn't sound half as excited as Jasper.

"Ali?"

"You _fucking_ bitch!" She screamed, I raised an eyebrow.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

"You didn't tell me you were contagious, stupid whore."

"Well there's no need to call names, darling." I smirked, wondering what she was going on about. Edward's hands moved across my back gently as he massaged it, I relaxed and sighed into the phone. "Why are you even awake?" She growled over the phone.

"I knew it. I knew one day you'd go rabid. Just didn't know when." I chuckled.

"I'm not rabid, fucking bitch!" She yelled, Jasper obviously tried to calm her down because she yelled again at him and then there was a smack from her side.

"Alice!" I said loudly into the phone. "Why did you call me?"

She blurted, "I'm pregnant." And then she proceeded to sob hysterically.

…TEC…

**Hope you laughed and/or enjoyed!**

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	36. Chapter 35

**Let me explain-make excuses- I have a shit ton of things going on right now. School, rehearsals, I just finished my entry for the Truly Anon Contest, and I'm preparing for a trip to Disney that I'm taking next week. I am SO sorry about the wait! The chapters pretty long though, hope you enjoy!**

**Thanks to: oceanblue2, muzaklover, melissamary55, christmastree, katiesparks21, SweetPJL, totes. Mah. Gotes, Clickchick18, Music ADD, rlwoods, Cici G, acl1002, sara-faith, Melnaugh, Yummy Dummy, MaryMary123, KManzie, dowlingnana, Cockerspanmom, dazzleglo, DenisseSchmidt, Kayla and shanese21. You're all just wonderful. Thank you!**

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

…TEC…

I woke up to Edward pressing light kisses across my shoulders, "Good morning, beautiful."

"Hi, baby." I whispered before turning onto my back and wrapping my arms around his neck, he pressed a chaste kiss to my lips before pulling backwards and taking me with him.

I looked down to find him not only fully clothed but dressed nicely. "What's that for?" I asked with a pointed look at his outfit.

"We've got a doctor's appointment in-" He checked his cell phone. "About an hour." I groaned and lay against his shoulder.

"Let's not go and say we did."

"How about we go and say we didn't." He smirked; I frowned and pushed away from him, flopping ungracefully onto the bed, face first. He patted my ass before standing. "Get up; we wouldn't want to be late right?" I mumbled noncommittally and he chuckled before making his way out of the room. He stopped in the doorway, turning back towards me. "Get up, Baby."

I pulled myself into a sitting position and gave him thumbs up, before shifting my legs over the edge of the bed. He nodded to himself and left the doorway, while I fell back onto the bed, curling into a little ball. I closed my eyes and drifted back into a light sleep.

Ten minutes later someone was trying to pull my nose off of my face while Edward, who sounded distant, grumbled. I batted the hands away and they retaliated by smacking my cheek really fucking hard. My eyes shot open and Edward threw some clothes onto my feet as he murmured into the cell phone. Seth knelt next to me, looking quite put out as he returned to disassembling my face.

"Child. Stop." I said groggily. Seth smirked at me before diving at my face, slobbering on my cheek affectionately. "So rough…" I whispered to him as his nose nailed my cheek during his kiss. His little fists wrapped around my shirt as he tugged me up.

"Up, Mama. Up!" I groaned and shot up, surprising him as I lifted him into the air above my head. He giggled at me and squirmed in my hands, forcing me to set him back in my lap. Edward snapped impatiently at me from the other end of the room and I stood, propping Seth up onto my hip as I made my way to him.

"Thank god you're awake." He huffed before tossing me _my_ cell phone. "I've been trying to play BFF with Alice all day but two pregnant women at once are…" I furrowed my eyebrows.

"But I was sleeping…" He rolled his eyes and took Seth.

"Hurry and get dressed, you slept way too late."

"What are you talking about?" He showed me his watch and I realized it was forty minutes later.

"Oh shit." He nodded before snapping again and raising my phone to my ear.

"Is that normal? I don't think that it's normal. Maybe I should start wearing Depends…" Alice babbled on into the phone.

"If you are peeing on yourself this early in the pregnancy you're just too lazy to hold it. The real issue is when the baby wants to use your bladder as a trampoline." I said turning the phone onto speaker so that I could search though my drawers and re-pick out my outfit, while simultaneously wondering if Edward was severely color blind.

"Uh oh…" Alice said after a moment of silence. There was a heaving noise and a few plops before I bid her a goodbye and hung up. It was normally hard for me to see people throwing up; it often induced my own puke. My being pregnant made that feeling ten times worse though, I felt queasy just hearing her. Ellie darted into my room screaming.

"Daddy said hurry up or we're leaving you, woman! He said that he wouldn't ever like you again if you didn't come. And that you wouldn't be invited to his birthday party if you didn't come now. And that you would stink if you didn't rush and that you're a-" I raised an eyebrow as Edward ran up behind her, covering her mouth.

"I said to tell her we leave in five." He grunted in her ear. She just smirked at him and walked out of the room, taking Seth's hand.

"One day I'm going to be gone, Baby. I'm going to need you to take my place." She said as she walked slowly with him, he seemed to be hanging onto her every word as they left.

"Bella! Baby, come on…" He gestured spastically towards the door. "What are you doing?" He asked as I rifled through my drawers.

"Looking for clothes." He gestured to the bed where his choices lay discarded. "Honey, I can't wear stripes and paisley." I said frowning at the skirt Carmen had sent me to make up for the sweaters.

"So… Alice asked me when we were going to announce our pregnancy." He said as he watched me strip and pull on a pair of jeans.

"What?"

"Tell our families that you are _pregnant_." I blanched and almost fell over, trying to shove my foot into the pant leg.

_Oh shit_.

"Agh… Mom is going to be pissed that I didn't tell her earlier."

"Say you just found out." He shrugged as if that was the perfect answer.

"Or I can just not tell them at all." Edward raised his eyebrows at my suggestion.

"I think she'd probably be less angry if you told her now." I frowned and ran a hand through my hair, followed by a brush. Ellie skidded into the room with my cell phone in hand. She tossed it at me and missed by a long shot, nailing Edward in the back. His back arched and he gasped.

"Sorry, Daddy." Ellie said stoically before turning to me. "Ms. Esme called. She said that Carlizle-" I snorted loudly at her pronunciation. "Got sick and that your appointment will have to be pushed back." Are you kidding me? I go through all of this trouble to get out of bed on a _Saturday_ morning and they cancel?

"Is she still on the phone?" I asked, Ellie shook her head. "You just took my call for me?"

"Aunt Alice called too. She wants you to come shopping with her. So you would have to take me too, right?" She asked with wide eyes, I shrugged.

"Sure, when?"

"Ten minutes." I rolled my eyes and went to sit back on the bed. My phone rang again and I answered it without looking at the screen.

"Hello?" Ellie jumped up on the bed behind me and started messing with my hair.

"Bella?" Riley's voice filtered through, I bit my lip and looked to Edward who was retrieving Seth from the door. "Hello?"

"Um…Yes?" I cleared my throat and he did too.

"I wanted to apologize." He said quietly. "I just couldn't… resist." Ellie tugged roughly on my hair, making me tilt my head back.

"I've heard that before." I grunted, he sighed.

"I mean it. I understand… if you don't want me around anymore." I held back from saying something unnecessarily bitchy.

"Oh I should be the _least_ of your worries." I chuckled humorlessly. Edward turned toward me with a lifted eyebrow. "Hold on, honey." I said to Ellie before exiting the room.

"Bella, give me another chance." I lifted an eyebrow.

"Are you crazy? You realize this shit happened _yesterday_!"

"I just want you to forgive me."

"How do you expect me to do that, asshole?" I said my voice raising. "You lied! About me, to my husband! You were obviously trying to hurt my relationship with Edward and I don't… I can't forgive that."

"Bella, if you knew how I feel about you-"

"It honestly wouldn't change anything. Riley, I can't seem to make you understand that I _love_ Edward. That won't _ever_ change, alright?" There was a huff on his end.

"I just need to know when to come by. I left all of my clothes and-" He continued to babble in my ear and I peeked back into the bedroom, where Edward was playing go fish with Ellie. It would be best if he came while none of us were here, but I also didn't want to be alone with him. I couldn't handle myself, but I didn't want it to come down to that.

"Edward?" He looked up at me curiously and Ellie screamed go fish in his ear. "What do you have to do today?"

He shrugged; my attempt at being sly obviously was unsuccessful. "I don't know. Why?"

"I wanted to make lunch and dinner, was wondering what time you'd be home again…"

He pulled Seth into my lap and ran his hand through his hair. "I don't know…" He repeated. "I need to finish up some paper work for my testimony down at the office, I'll probably leave here at three, and get back around six." I nodded and walked into Ellie's room.

"You should come around four." I said quietly, there was a sinking feeling in my stomach but I ignored it, pushing it away.

"Thank you, so much, Bell." I nodded and rolled my eyes.

"Bye." He continued to thank me as I snapped the phone shut. I sighed and turned to see Edward standing in the doorway. His arms were folded over his chest and he gave me an unreadable look.

He tilted his chin at me, his gaze now focused on my phone. "Who was that?"

I stepped towards him pulling his arms apart and wrapping them around my waist, locking my fingers behind his neck. There was a little voice in my head telling me to lie, and say it was Alice.

"That was Alec." I said honestly. His jaw clenched and his hands gripped my waist pushing me back so he could meet my eyes.

"Why were you calling Alec?" I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair.

"He wants to come by and get his things, Baby." I shrugged, moving past him and through the door.

"The hell he will." He growled from behind me. "Fuck that." He scoffed. I fumbled with my hands and sat back down in front of Ellie, letting her finish my hair. There was a knock on the door and Edwards gaze shot to the floor.

I rolled my eyes, "Edward. Calm down. It's Alice." My point was proven once the door hit the wall and she called out to me. I turned to grab my coat and saw Seth dead asleep on the bed amongst the cards they were playing with earlier. "Ellie, go find your coat." She nodded and jumped off of the bed. I stood and turned to Edward with a raised eyebrow. I wasn't going to say anything in regards to his behavior seeing as Riley assaulted me just the day before, putting him on guard.

I wrapped my arms around his waist, pressing my lips into his neck. "Baby," I whispered, making him shiver gently. "calm down. I'll be fine." I looked up and met his eyes. "I love you." Alice's steps thundered up the staircase and Edward pressed his lips to mine tightly. I moaned quietly and wrapped my arms around his neck, tangling my fingers into the small hairs at the nape of his neck. I pulled back from him, "I love you, and he won't do anything to change that, if that's what you are worried about." I met his eyes and he sighed, burying his nose into my neck and hugging me tightly.

"I love you too."

"This is too cute." Alice deadpanned from the doorway. "But I need to get baby shit. So…" She thrust her thumb behind her and turned walking off. I pecked Edward's lips once more.

"You want me to take Seth?" He shook his head.

"He needs to sleep anyway-" He murmured looking to our sleeping little boy. "Go on." I nodded and darted towards the door, where Ellie was pulling on her coat in silence.

"What's up, kid?" I tapped her chin and she tossed me a grin.

"Nothing." That was _never_ a good answer in Ellie terms. There was a knock on the door and I was hoping Alec hadn't jumped the gun. My eyes widened and I headed for the living room sitting on the couch, freaking out for a bit before deciding to answer the door. I realized Ellie hadn't followed me.

"Ellie, don't answer the door. Wait until I get there." She sauntered into the room.

"I wasn't going to answer the door." She plopped back into my lap as I attempted to get up. I picked her up by the waist and set her on my hip as I went to the door.

"You're getting heavy kid." I grumbled, she rolled her eyes and kicked her feet.

"No stop! Trust me what is on the other side of that door is ugly and disgusting."

"I can here you." Alice shouted from the other side of the door. I pulled it open and set Ellie down. Alice looked down to Ellie and mumbled, "Bitch say what?" Ellie rolled her eyes.

"Bitch say you owe me a quarter!" She cackled.

Alice kneeled down in front of Ellie and wagged her finger, "No, no. Babies aren't allowed to cuss."

"Mhmm well only one of us still wets the bed at night, and it isn't me." She poked Alice in the nose and I grabbed my purse up and took Ellie's hand as we headed to the car. Ellie tugged on my hand as I put her into her car seat.

"You shouldn't lock anyone out, Ellie. It's not nice."

"Since when do I have to worry about being nice?"

"Since you started getting such a smart mouth." I raised an eyebrow and she smirked.

"Okay. I won't lock anyone out without reason. Alice is a reason."

"You also need to worry about watching your mouth."

"What I say?"

"You said bitch earlier, Ellie." I pointed out.

"Oh no! I meant the dog…"

"I doubt it,"

"Don't expect the unexpected."

"What?"

"If you assume you only make a '_you-know-what'_ out of you and me."

"What are you talking about?"

"Bippity boppity boo."

"Don't appease her by talking back, Bella. I say you just hit her." I shook my head.

_This is why I'll probably end up adopting her kid._

"Well see there's a difference between you and me. You're a bad person." I got into the car and took off down the road. We shortly pulled up in front of the grocery store.

"I second that!" Ellie squeaked.

"Well you shouldn't talk about your aunt like that." Alice scolded in her adult voice, which also resembled her trying-to-pass-a-kidney-stone-while-giving-birth voice.

"Daddy doesn't have a sister technically." Ellie snipped.

"Yeah," Alice turned to look at her, "But Mommy has a secret lover." She ran a hand up my thigh and I hit her in the arm, with the side of my fist.

We all exited the car and I pulled Ellie from her car seat. She skipped ahead of Alice and me.

"You need to watch what you say around her." I hissed at Alice.

"I speak nothing but the truth, lover." She said loud enough to make Ellie turn and look at us with wide eyes.

"I'm going to need you to not convince my kid that I'm cheating on her father." I shook my head.

"What so now you can't double up? I say you can have the best of both worlds. Wise words Miley. Wise words…"

"Yes, take advice from someone who can't be tamed."

"She so easy she should be Staples new advertisement character. Instead of a button that says 'That was easy' she could just say '_Miley Cyrus_'." She doubled over in laughter and I frowned.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"Oh many things child. Many things." She groaned. Next thing I knew we were in front of a case of condoms.

"You ever used a chick condom? That shit is… ugh…"

"I haven't. It looks like you haven't either." I raised an eyebrow and patted her stomach.

She rolled her eyes and looked back to the condom display. "You know what I hate? Seeing ugly children on television."

"Condoms make you think of children?" I wrinkled my nose.

"It depends on the circumstance." She shrugged.

"I bet you weren't thinking about children when you decided to forgo the condom."

"Haha this is funny. Let's make more Alice is preggo jokes. Fucking hypocrite." Ellie held out her hand and Alice collapsed into tears. I pushed down Ellie's hand and pulled Alice into my arms, attempting to soothe her.

There was a whimper on my left and I lifted an eyebrow, because there was a shelf to the left of us.

"Shh… If you shut up they might kiss." A young male voice hissed. I snorted and let Alice go while Ellie stood on her tip toes to see through the gap.

"And this is why they say girls are smarter." She bit; the boys must have hit their heads on the shelf because the boxes of cereal on the above shelf rattled.

I pushed Ellie to the side to peak at the peepers and smirked.

"Mrs. Masen?" It was the kid that Edward and I had seen in the mall, the day I was bugged.

"Ben." I lifted an eyebrow and he looked over to find his friend who was long gone.

He sent a pointed glance at Alice who was sniffling into her jacket sleeve. "So… How are you?"

…TEC…

An hour after the run in with Edward's old student we were headed to some French store where all they sold was overpriced baby crap. Alice wanted the best though, so who was I to judge?

"This is cute." Alice said holding up a pink onesie that said 'Daddy's Girl', she tossed it to me and I kinked an eyebrow.

"You don't know the sex of the baby…" She just pointed at me with a knowing look before tossing me a blue one that said 'Momma's Boy'. I shook my head and even though I wasn't buying anything I checked the price tag, purely out of habit. My jaw dropped at what I saw.

"You're paying fifty dollars for an _onesie_?"

"No. I'm paying one hundred for two." She said lifting up little clothes with an appraising eye.

"Okay, you must not realize how quickly children blow through clothes. Especially the young ones. Fifty bucks is just unreasonable for something the baby can wear for a few months." I got an unappreciative glare from the store clerk and threw one right back. Ellie came up and tapped me on my hip.

"Mommy could you get this for me?" She held up a frilly pink dress that was about fifty sizes too small, it looked like it would fit a toddler.

"What? Why?"

"So I can play dress up."

"Honey, that's a little small for you." I said softly as she held the small fabric to her chest.

"It's not for me silly."

"Well then who's it for?"

"Say me and see what happens." Alice grunted from behind me, I snickered and she glared.

"It's for dress up, Mother." She said widening her eyes.

"Who would wear it?" She bit her lip and slipped the dress into Alice's basket. "Ellie!" She turned around.

"Seth. But I think he would like it!" Her hands were clasped in front of her face and she slid onto her knees in front of me.

"No." I helped her to her feet and shook my head.

"Mommy, I thought you wanted me to like him."

"Dressing him in drag won't make you like him anymore, Ellie." I murmured before taking Alice's basket and checking price tags, she was going to run Jasper dry with this unnecessary spree.

"Mommy, its bonding."

"No. Put it back." She frowned and hung the little dress on the nearest rack. I looked down at my watch and groaned. It was three thirty and Riley was supposed to come by soon.

"Alice, I need to get going, Hun." She nodded and picked up all of the little unnecessary things that I had put back, checking out quickly. Once we were in the car Alice babbled on about the little outfits she had bought while Ellie called her names from her car seat.

"What's wrong with you?" Alice asked as we pulled onto my street.

"I invited Riley back, to get his things." I cleared my throat and she shrugged.

"So?"

"So, Edward kicked him out yesterday." My breathing was getting shallower as we pulled up to my house. I really shouldn't have done this… I was just asking for some shit to go down.

"What? Why would he do that?"

"Daddy said Riley was getting really handsy with Mommy. And that Riley was a dick. But not to repeat that last part." Ellie said as she stared out of the window. I stopped the car and unbuckled Ellie before bounding up the steps with her in tote.

"Bella! What did Riley do? I want details…" Alice said as if it were normal for me to be borderline molested.

"No! Are you crazy?" I entered my key but the chain was on the door, keeping me out. My eyebrows furrowed because you had to be _inside_ the house to chain the door. The door was pushed back under my hands and someone fumbled with the chain. Before the door opened to reveal a fuming Edward.

_Oh shit_.

"Is this some kind of game to you?" He asked gesturing upstairs. I could understand that he still held something against Riley but my anger escalated.

"I just let him come back to get clothes, Edward." I gritted. "In and out." Riley appeared upstairs in the hallway visible to where we stood.

He looked _bad_.

His face was bruised, an eye swollen and his nose askew. Alice gasped from behind me and I scratched my cheek. He looked a hell of a lot worse than he had when he was leaving yesterday. Ellie pushed her way past all of us until Alec was in sight. It was completely silent as she darted up the stairs and hugged him tightly.

He knelt down and whispered to her before hugging her once more.

"What did you do to him?" Edward glared at Alice and me, before making his way into the kitchen. Alec and Ellie were on the bottom floor, in front of us, by the time I looked back.

"I really am sorry." He said softly, I nodded and then stepped out of his way, hoping that this was the last time he fucked everything up for me. There was a honk outside and two cars were in my driveway. Jasper and Emmett's. Alice hugged me once before following after Riley to her car.

Ellie cleared her throat before darting up the steps towards her room.

"Edward?" I headed towards the kitchen to see him drinking out of a coffee mug.

"I just _don't_ understand…" He mumbled over the edge of his cup, leaning back in his chair. "Why don't you tell me these things? He kisses you and I have to walk in on it a _second_ time to realize what had happened. Then I come home and he is sitting on my porch?" His eyes pierced mine and I frowned.

"I'm sorry."

"Apparently so was he. Didn't stop him from doing it again did it?" He was going all Daddy mode on me, using the controlled tone that he used with Ellie.

"Edward." I warned, my phone buzzed and I checked the screen discreetly.

_**I know things are tough now.**_ I rolled my eyes at Alice's text and then it beeped with a multimedia message, which I once again checked.

_**But remember Make up sex is the best.**_ There was a picture of a man's ass with a woman's leg wrapped around it, obviously in the midst of fucking. It would be like Alice to have something like that saved into her phone.

"Bella." Edward waved at me from across the room and I went towards him, pulling a chair up so that I was right across from him.

"We couldn't just hold his clothes hostage, Baby." I scooted closer and his arms flexed as he gripped his chair, pushing it away from me. I leaned over and ran my hands up from his knee to the top of his thighs, lightly running my thumb over his hardening member. He was easier to work up than little Ben Cheney. I smirked and ran my nose down the side of his neck.

"Bella. Damn it." He grabbed my wrist, placing my hands back into my lap.

"I said I won't do it again. Don't make me punch you." I threatened for no apparent reason.

"Bella-" I wrapped my feet around the legs of his chair, pulling my own seat up to his. I flicked open the button of his pants and looked over my shoulder, before hearing Ellie thump around upstairs. "We need to talk-"

"I hope it's not important. I don't think you'll remember it after this." I pulled his semi out of his pants and through the hole in his boxers, his head fell back against the chair and he groaned.

"You can't fight every fucking fight with sex, Bella." I shook my head and kissed his hardening dick, making the blood flow to it even quicker.

"Of course not, handsome." I wrapped my hand around him and kissed the tip. "Just this one." He groaned and I wrapped my mouth around him, running my tongue over the veins in his throbbing cock.

"No-Bella…" I deep throated him and gagged a bit making him moan loudly.

He relaxed in his chair, wrapping my hair around his hand, thrusting into my mouth. "Okay, just this one."

…TEC…

**I hope you laughed and or enjoyed!**

**Should Bella have invited him back? What would YOU have done?**

**I honestly want to hear what you think… please review even though I've missed like two updates :(**

**But I still love you all and I **_**will**_** finish and write another story, regardless.**

**We've got maybe one or two more chapters left before the end!**

**I know you all don't like Edward and Bella fighting, so I try to end the chapters with the ends of their arguments. Riley won't be a menace anymore though and we **_**will**_** end on a happy note!**

**Let's attempt… 900? Yes! P.S. Every reviewer (that's not anonymous) will get the rest of the 'I'm pregnant' conversation! I just couldn't fit it in this chapter.**


	37. Chapter 36

**Ugh this FF fail sucked :( but thank you for coming BACK and reviewing if it wasn't working before much love ladies /3**

**Thanks to: muzaklover, twilight642531, dr. meow1234, christmastree, jkkhreedy, crazy-chick-4life, koleen05, KManzie, Wants2BeACullen, totes. mah. gotes, dowlingnana, DenisseSchmidt, sandra moore, Cici G, and dazzleglo. **

**Standard Disclaimer Applies.**

**There is also just the **_**slightest**_** time jump in this chapter!**

…TEC…

"I'm sorry honey. Carlisle is just- I can't leave him at this point. He is progressively getting worse." I shook my head.

"That's fine. Give him my best."

"I will. As for this appointment of yours…" There was some flipping of paper on her end. "I could get you in with my partner if you'd want?"

"Okay, yeah that works." I said running a hand over my rapidly growing stomach. Seth had his ear pressed up against the barely there bump listening for… well I didn't know what he was listening for. He probably was just using me as a pillow. I ran my fingers lightly through his hair and dropped my head back against the couch. Edward had taken Ellie out for ice cream after work, and some Daddy daughter time, earlier leaving me and Sethy-pie alone.

"Mama?" He whispered, obviously not asleep.

"Hmm?" There was a sharp jab to my stomach as he poked me, I shot up. "No. No, sweetheart. You don't want to hurt the baby."

"Mama, I baby…" He said in confusion. I smiled softly and pulled him up so that he laid against my free shoulder, playing with my ear gently.

"Yes, you'll always be my baby." I turned and pressed a kiss to his cheek, eliciting a giggle from him.

"Bella?" Esme spoke from the phone, drawing my attention back to her.

"I'm here."

"Alright, you'll be in with Jane Diaz tomorrow at three o'clock."

"Okay, thanks Esme."

"No problem, honey. I hope all goes well."

"Thank you." I hung up the phone and turned my attention back to Seth who was rubbing my belly. Edward and I hadn't actually formally addressed the kids about the baby, yet we let the word _baby_ slip so much they would have to be a little slow to miss it.

I smiled watching Seth's hand caress my stomach as he stared at it in awe. His eyes were comically wide as he poked at my bump. His little head whipped back and forth as he moved his hand from my stomach to his, and then back again.

I pressed multiple kisses into his neck and he giggled pushing my face away. "You are too cute, Sethy." He blushed and I attacked his neck again, my fingers joining in tickling his sides. "My goodness. I love you so much, kid." I said kissing his chubby little cheek.

"Love you too. This is why I love being here. I never get these kinds of welcomes at my house." My eyes widened and I turned to see Emmett leaning over my shoulder.

"Emmett! What the fuck!" I screamed making Seth scream and Emmett snicker. He jumped over the back of the couch landing with his, dirty ass, shoes on my leather. I sat Seth down on my free side and swung my fist into Em's gut. "Get your shoes off of my couch." Emmett's feet shot down and he frowned, leaning over me to peek at Seth.

"His feet are up!"

"He hasn't gone anywhere." He scoffed and I pulled Seth back into my lap.

"Where's Edward?"

"He's out with Ellie, getting ice cream." He hummed and slung his mammoth arm over my shoulders pulling me in for a hug. He crushed me against his side and Seth screamed.

"Stop! Baby!" He attempted to pry my torso away from Emmett's.

"Did your kid just call me baby?"

"No, you dumbass." I grunted straightening up. Seth laid his ear against my stomach again, patting it gently, his eyes wide as they met mine.

"Baby okay, Mama?" I smiled at him and nodded. Emmett gasped and lifted up my large hoodie, to reveal my baby bump.

"You're pregnant!" He squealed, poking at my stomach. I shivered at the onslaught of cold air and fingers, rushing to pull my jacket back down. "I thought Edward had just over fed you." I smacked his chest with a glare.

"Come here my sweet boy." I pulled him up and smacked a kiss on his little mouth, before hugging him to my chest.

"So what's your plan?" Emmett asked typing something into his phone. "To get pregnant every time they grow past hugging size?"

"Shut up, Emmett. This wasn't planned, you ass." I looked over at his phone nosily and gasped, smacking the device onto the floor. It skidded across my hardwood and hit the fireplace. "What are you _doing_?"

"Mom is going to be pissed."

"Why?" He raised an eyebrow like that answered my question. "I can get pregnant if I want to. I'm _married_ for Christ sakes…"

"What? Who cares about you being pregnant." I huffed and Seth rubbed my stomach some more. "Mom's going to be mad that you haven't already told her. You have to be what?" He lifted my jacket again. "Twenty months?"

"No. You can't be twenty months pregnant." I rolled my eyes. "I'm only a few months…" It was determined that it wasn't what we did on Thanksgiving that created another child but more like how we rang in Halloween, a month before. That extra month that we were unaware of made a big difference in terms of the size of my bump.

"How many months?"

"Four and a half."

"Four? Ha, she'll eat you alive for that."

"What am I supposed to do? Call my mother every time I have sex?" I put my hand up to my ear as though holding a phone. "Yeah mom. We didn't use a condom this time, it got a little heated, so just wanted to let you know there's a possibility-" Emmett covered my mouth and I licked his palm.

"That's what me and Rosie do. Except we're much more short and sweet than you. You vulgar-" he scoffed and pushed away my face, which wasn't even close to him. "I just send off a sweet little text saying _We fucked, love you._" My eyes widened and his head bobbed.

"I know you're joking. But a part of me says that's something that you would do…" He smiled at me and pulled Seth into his lap, the little boy scrambled from his uncles giant hands. I grabbed my baby back cradling him in my arms protectively. He turned and grabbed my lap top off of the side table and opened it typing some shit into Google.

"What are you doing?" I asked straightening up. Emmett pulled up a video of a cartoon baby surrounded by red. "Oh my god, Emmett…"

He pressed play and the monotonous voice rang out through the room, talking about cervical plugs and how the baby's head was going to overlap in the vaginal canal.

"This is why abstinence is key, Belly-boo." He nodded, pointing as the baby slid out of the woman's vagina.

"I know what happens, Emmett." I said as Seth played with my fingers.

"Now I'm going to learn you about some good ole' friends I call by the name of Aids, gonorrhea, and Syphilis." He mocked an ugly, twangy, southern accent and I winced in disgust.

"Learn me? Get out of my house, Em." He smirked and pressed a kiss to my temple before standing and heading into my kitchen, only to return minutes later with a sandwich.

"I'm not leaving! Rosie's down at the station with Riley and I'm all alone…" he pouted and I rolled my eyes.

"Fine, sit." This is how I ended up watching multiple horror stories about pregnancies for about two hours with my older brother.

"Well… If it did happen to rip then you would be the first woman to poop from her vagina." I nodded and tapped my chin thoughtfully. A throat cleared from behind us and we both jumped slamming the laptop closed. Ellie and Edward stood in the doorway with matching looks of confusion and pity. I understood though, I pity myself when I engage in the pure stupidity that is conversations with Emmett. Which is strange, because my brother is one smart fuck, we just don't make an intelligent pair together.

"Oh, hey." I said lowering myself back down to the couch.

"Wassup, little bit?" Emmett asked Ellie before she launched herself into his arms.

"Daddy took me for ice cream." She started, Edward fell onto the couch next to me and removed Seth from my lap, replacing the baby with his head and laying the child on his chest.

"How was your trip?" I asked dragging my finger down his scalp gently, his eyes widened and he exhaled loudly.

"Tiring." I nodded and Ellie ran up behind me, leaning over the couch to grab my neck and press a kiss to my cheek.

"I love you, Mommy."

"What'd you do?" I asked craning my neck to see her; she smiled guiltily and emptied her pockets, letting a shit load of little pieces of paper fall over Seth and Edward.

"Daddy and Jasper made a bet." She whispered, Edward put a finger to his lips and she just smirked. "Who was cuter with a kid? Obviously it was centered on my general cuteness but they wanted to ride on my coat tails so… you know… I'm here for the people." She patted Edwards shoulder and I chuckled.

"Who won?"

"Daddy." Edward smirked triumphantly from my lap, but tried to hide it when he noticed my looking. "Some people thought Uncle Jazzy kidnapped me, 'cause we don't look alike."

"Way to steal my thunder, kid." She giggled at Edward before rounding the side of the couch and squeezing in between me and the arm rest. I fingered the slips of paper on Edward's chest thoughtlessly and he smirked brushing them onto the ground and leaning up to kiss me chastely. Emmett returned from where ever the hell he'd gone and sat on Edwards lap.

"Uh… the fu-" I slapped my hand over Edward's mouth and the hand Ellie was outstretching hung back down at her side.

"Oh… well you like it when Bella does it. Ex_cuse_ me for thinking it ran in the family!" I patted Em's shoulder and he stood, freeing up Edwards lap. Edward glared silently at him before snickering and turning to me.

"Did you schedule an appointment?" My head bobbed up and down slowly. "When is it?"

"Tomorrow, three o'clock." He nodded and turned, nuzzling his nose into my stomach. "Are you coming?" He lifted an eyebrow.

"Of course I am. Why wouldn't I?"

"You have work."

"I'll ask Charlie to leave a bit early."

"Dad's going to be so pissed."

"Really, Emmett?" He smirked at me and I rolled my eyes. I looked down at Edward's confused face and sighed. "Apparently my family doesn't seem to realize that procreation is kind of a part of life."

"Can I tell them please, Bella?"

"No. Go home, Emmett." He smirked and wiggled his fingers at me before picking up his coat. He leaned over the couch and pecked my and Ellie's cheeks and slapped Edwards hand goodbye, before dropping my phone ,that I didn't know he had, into my lap.

"I'm out." The door slammed a minute later.

…TEC…

"Hi, I have an appointment with Jane Diaz." I said to the receptionist. It was the same woman from my visit before last. She regarded my cautiously and sent Edward looks of pity continuously. I rolled my eyes and signed the little clipboard up on the counter.

"I thought Esme was your-" Edward said in confusion next to me, I shook my head.

"No, Carlisle got sick so she recommended me to Jane." He nodded and we turned to sit in the waiting area. Seth was asleep on Edward's shoulder and Ellie was in school, we signed her up for one day of the after school care service today. Edward wrapped an arm around me and I leaned against his other shoulder as we waited. My phone buzzed loudly in my purse and I dug it out, seeing a text from Emmett.

_**Where are you B?-Em**_

_The doctor's office…-B_

_**Okay :-D-Em**_

…_-B_

I rolled my eyes and pressed my nose into Edwards warm neck.

"I love you." I whispered, he laid a kiss on my forehead and his hand flexed around my shoulder.

"Love you too, Baby." I set my phone on my lap and slid my hand onto his thigh, picking at the fabric of his pants.

_Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh you ain't ready fuh this._ My eyes widened and I shot up, knocking my head into Edward's chin. My fucking phone was blaring London Bridge by Fergie.

_Emmett._

"Dear goodness…" He groaned rubbing his chin, I picked up my phone and saw that it was my mother calling.

"Hello?" I plugged my ear with one hand.

"_Isabella Marie Swan_." She growled.

I bit my lip, "Um… this is she."

"_What the hell? You think that you can just go and get married and not tell us anything?_"

"You were at my wedding, mom…"

"_I know that!_"

"Okay… so…"

"_You were just going to keep my grandbabies from me? Ugh!_"

"What are you talking about?" I asked nervously, already making plans in my head about how to hide Emmett's body.

_Alice would help._

"_You're pregnant!_" She accused.

"Um. Yes?" She screamed a string of profanities.

"_How _dare _you not tell me_?"

"Mom-" She huffed.

"_Four and a half months?_"

"Yes…" She screamed again and I rolled my eyes. "Stop being so dramatic, Mom. It's not that bad. You are supposed to be happy…"

"_You should have called me. Came to see me, anything. You all never come to see me anymore…_"

"Ellie has school and Edward works-"

"_You know what? I'm going to be a good family member. One who doesn't keep things like children from their loved ones._" She took a deep breath and if she said that she was pregnant I was fully prepared to throw up.

"_Yep. I'm going through menopause._" I wrinkled my nose and a tall, curvy, tanned woman with entirely too much leg showing to be considered professional, entered the lobby. Her jet black hair cascaded down her back and she moved lithely towards us. She looked like a fucking model. I think Edward thought so too.

"Close your mouth, Baby. Wouldn't want my fist in it." I turned to glare at him and he blushed.

"I would if you hadn't have broken my jaw with your hard ass head." He said before snapping his mouth closed.

"Isabella?" She asked, staring at my husband before glancing at me. I stood and looked her up and down with my bitch brow.

"I'm _over here._" I bit, her gaze broke away from Edward and she too kinked an eyebrow, looking me up and down.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Jane Diaz." She thrust out a hand and I shook it silently. "Um… You can follow me back to the ultrasound room." She turned and strutted into her office.

"Mom? I have to go. I'll talk to you later thought."

"_Isabella-!_"I hung up and slid it into my back pocket before entering.

"Okay, can you lift your shirt for me?" I settled into the chair/ table thing and laid back.

"This is going to be a bit cold." She said quietly before spreading around the jelly. "Did you two want to know the sex of your baby?" I shrugged and Edward nodded. She pressed a shit ton od buttons before a picture lit up on a screen in front of us. Edward settled into a chair next to mine and rocked Seth gently. The doctor moved the little remote over my stomach for a second looking for the heartbeat I'm sure. I looked up at her and she had her eyes glued to Edward, who wasn't really paying attention to her.

I clenched my jaw and tapped her arm, bending a finger, telling her to come closer. "Keep your eyes off of my husband. I would hate to have to go to jail for something as simple as shoving my _foot_ up your _ass_." I said, her eyebrows lifted and she whispered back.

"Sorry. I can't help it. There just anything sexier than a man with a baby." The remote stopped and I was about to reach up and strangle her when a quick thumping echoed in the room. My hand went to my mouth and tears filled my eyes as I looked at the screen. I couldn't make out anything, never could, but the babies heart beat was enough for me.

Edward scooped up my hand, placing a soft kiss on the back of it as we listened. It seemed to be thumping a mile a minute and my eyes widened.

"Is that… normal?" Edward asked in my ear. I couldn't remember, Seth's heartbeat didn't seem nearly as fast at this stage.

Jane looked at the monitor in confusion before shifting the remote. "It seems to be going a little bit fas-" her eyes widened and she smiled. "Oh, that would explain it." She set the remote back onto the cart and picked up a file, flipping through it before tossing it back onto the cart and smiling at us. She just picked up the remote and placed it on my stomach again, moving to the opposite side of the heartbeat, where it seemed to be just as strong.

Edwards hand tightened around mine and a tear fell from my eyes. "Mom, dad, this is baby number one." She pointed at a little space that was blurry and then shifted her hand and the remote. "And this is baby number two. They should be due around the 24th of July if my calculations are right." She turned and smiled at us. Or more like she turned and gave Edward a sultry smirk.

Two.

_Two._

_Oh god… my vagina._

I smirked at myself and then realized that I had tears streaming down my face. I wiped them off before turning to Edward who was staring wide eyed at the screen.

"Twins?" He asked quietly, Jane nodded and he turned to me. "Twins." I smiled. I wasn't just as shocked as him. Well, scratch that. He looked like he was about to pass out. I snapped my fingers in his face.

"Edward. Baby-" His eyes started to drift upwards and I slapped his face gently a couple of times. This wasn't the first time this had happened of course, he flipped out when we found out about Seth too. "This is great, right?" I rubbed my thumb against his cheek as my hand cupped his face and he nodded, wrapping his hands around my wrist.

"Well…" Jane said from the machine. "They both appear healthy and are developing well." I nodded and swiped some more tears away. She continued to molest my stomach with the cold remote as we stared at the screen.

_And the __**two**__ babies._

"What about the sex-" he paused. "es…?"

"They are dizygotic twins." I narrowed my eyes at her and she smirked triumphantly at her use of the word.

"Which means…" I probed.

"They are Fraternal twins. One of each." She clarified, I nodded and she handed me a cloth to wipe off my stomach. I sighed and sat up, yanking my shirt down after I was finished.

"Dada?" Seth said quietly, smacking at Edwards face. He had gone still again, but this time instead of looking like he had seen his grandmother naked he just looked mildly nauseous. I shook my head and took Seth from his arms.

"I'll meet you at the desk." Jane said before moving out of the room quietly.

"Be still." I whispered to Seth before standing him next to me in front of Edward. I crouched down and took Edward's face in my hands. "Are you going to be okay?" His eyes were wide and unseeing as they stared into mine. He nodded slowly and helped me stand up as he went. "We're fine. We have enough room at the house and enough love for all four." He collapsed back into the chair.

He groaned, "Oh god, four…" I smiled softly and pulled him back up to stand before hugging him tightly. I looked down to see Seth yanking on a tray and grabbed him up before it fell on him.

"You okay?" I asked Edward, he nodded and grabbed my waist pulling me towards him as we went to the lobby. We quickly finished up and were heading towards Ellie's school in no time.

"How'd your baby appointment go, Mommy?" Ellie asked as I waved her over to sign her out from the after school program.

"Good."

"The baby's a girl right?" She looked up at me and I opened my mouth but she was already talking again. "Told you." She climbed in the car and I got in next to Edward who was staring at my cell phone.

"What?" I plucked it from his fingers and stared at a message from Alice that said she had invited everyone over after speaking to Emmett who told her no one knew about the baby.

I shot one back, _No, Alice-B_

_**Too late, beautiful. B) –A**_

I groaned and Edward looked at me from the corner of his eye. A look that said 'want me to tell her?' accompanied me a glance tossed at Ellie. I shook my head.

"Ellie, sweetheart. It's a boy _and_ a girl."

"Like a cross dresser? It's a little early to judge, Mommy." Edward furrowed his eyebrows and turned to look at Ellie before starting up the car.

"Honey, we're having _twins_."

"What do you mean?" She asked carefully.

"There's going to be _two_ babies, instead of one." Edward choked.

"_What!_" She screamed and Seth yelled with her. "You see Baby. I told you they were trying to replace us." She said turning Seth so that they were face to face. Seth nodded dumbly and they both flopped back into their seats.

"We aren't trying to replace you, honey." I said softly.

"You're keeping us too?" I nodded and smiled.

"Of course, Ellie." She looked as though she didn't believe me.

"_Yay!_" Seth squealed from behind Edward. Ellie was silent and Seth babbled at her for the rest of the ride home. When we pulled into the driveway there were cars in my driveway and on the street in front of my house.

"What the hell?" My jaw clenched and I slowly moved through the motions of getting the kids out and whatnot before moving towards the door. Seth lazily played with my hair as Edward tugged me towards the door. Ellie had made a run for the door and was in the house before we had fully unbuckled her.

"Surprise!" I jumped as I walked into my house. I plastered a smile on my face but my eyes flickered up to the second floor where Ellie was slamming her door. Edward didn't even try and mask the worry on his face. A few people in the large crowd were turned looking at our oldest march through the house as well.

Rose was the first to ambush us, "Congratulations! I'm so happy for you two!" She wrapped her arms around my neck and then inconspicuously pulled Seth away from me, before hugging Edward. I was soon crowded my hugs and well wishes and everything. I couldn't focus on all of the excitement around me because my little girl thought that we did this to spite her. Once I had gotten bored of all of the hugs and whatnot's, I went to the steps and raised my hand in the air.

"I would like also congratulate our hostess on her first child!" I clapped as did everyone else and they moved to turn on her I reached over the banister and tapped Edwards shoulder, waving for him to come with me. He turned to make sure Renee was done speaking to him before dashing up the steps with me.

I knocked on Ellie's door softly, "Ellie?"

"Honey, can we come in?" Edward spoke.

"I don't want to talk to you guys." I bit my lip before opening the door and walking in with Edward only a step behind me. She laid face down on top of her comforter, her shoes and jacket still on. I went to her bed and crawled in next to her, Edward sat on her other side.

"What do you want? Is it time for me to pack up my stuff and leave?" She jumped off of the bed and went to her closet, pulling out a sparkly ppink suitcase with Tinkerbelle on the front. She unzipped it and started throwing Barbie's and other toys in there.

"Of course not, pumpkin." She didn't stop and Edward tapped my thigh before standing and grabbing a large Hello Kitty bag off of the top of her shelf. He too grabbed random stuff from her room, which included a Barbie doll head and some fake make-up.

"Thanks for your help, _Daddy_." She glared at him and kept moving.

"I'm not helping you." She turned and stared at him for a minute.

"Then what are you doing?" She asked marching over to where he stood, pushing race cars into that little pink bag.

"You go. I go." He zipped up the bag and slung it over his shoulder, gesturing towards the door. "After you." She zipped up her suitcase as well and stared at him for a good while.

"No you won't." She said dropping the bag, she looked utterly dejected and dropped into the ground pulling her knees to her chest. Edward put his bag down and sat Indian style next to her, pulling her into his lap. I wasn't sure if I should go or stay. Ellie crawled into his lap and hugged his neck, before whispering in his ear.

"Well of course Mommy would come, honey." He waved me over and I rushed towards them, sitting with them and stroking Ellie's hair.

"They won't take you away?"

"Of course not, sweetheart. They are babies." I looked to Edward who was handling this shockingly well. "Did Seth take us away?" She shrugged.

"I guess not. I'm sorry." She said softly, kissing Edwards cheek and then my own.

"It's okay, pumpkin." I rubbed her back before standing. "Come on kid. There's a party downstairs. You didn't even get to say hi to Uncle Em or Jazz." She nodded and stood, wiping a lone tear off of her face. She wrapped and arm around my waist and the three of us headed down the steps.

"Oh, we thought you two had snuck off to _celebrate_ again." Carmen snickered from behind me after I made my way down the steps. I ignored her comment and wrapped my arms around her.

"Hi, Carm." She smiled and turned to Ellie, enthusiastically grabbing her into a hug and then moving onto Edward. Emmett bounded up to me.

"Hello, Bellsie." He smirked and I smacked his chest.

"I hate you." He hugged me tightly, probably so that I couldn't hit him anymore.

"So… boy or girl?" He half shouted in my fucking ear.

All eyes were on me, "um… Both?"

"Hermaphrodite?" Alice said with a sympathetic pout. I would reach for my shoe but Emmett still held me tight.

"Twins… dumbass." I hissed with a shake of my head. The room erupted into cheers again. I was also hugged another thousand times as I looked for Edward. I found him and Carmen in the kitchen heads bent together as they spoke, I was about to turn in go back to the chaos, so that they could have their moment but Edward waved me over.

Carmen smiled widely at me, "Good you're here,"

_You know it's just my house and all…_

"I just thought you two would like to know that your mother-" She pointed at Edward, "would have loved for you to name your daughter Olivia." She looked to me. "It's a girl, right?" I nodded.

"Twins." She bounced on her heels and clapped happily.

"How do you know?"

"She wanted to name Ellie, Olivia." Edward blanched and leaned towards his aunt as though he hadn't heard her.

"What?" She nodded. "You knew this… and you let me name her Elizabeth?" His eyes glowed with dismay and I patted his chest.

"It was a nice tribute to name Ellie after your mother, Baby." I nodded then turned to Carmen.

"Olivia it is."

…TEC…

_**Well I hope you laughed and or enjoyed!**_

_**(You might want to read the bottom AN it's chock full of information!)**_

_**That's it for me folks. Last chapter before the new story :( **_

_**Whaddaya think?**_

_**Four.**_

_**And you know one of the twins names and their birthday as well! You also know that in the following story, Ellie will be fourteen, putting Seth at nine and the twins at seven, as of now! Give or take a year :D**_

_**Thanks to DenisseSchmidt, KManzie and Indianprincess28 for their suggestions on Olivia way back in chapter 22!**_

_**Yeah… a lot of stuff happened in this unusually long chapter whew! Tell me your thoughts! Did you like the ending? What do you want the boy's middle name to be? FOUR? **_

_**The boy's first name WILL be Anthony. Middle names will come from here:**_

_**Hunter, Blake, Charlie, A(i)den, Damien, Erin, Cameron, Daniel (Danny), Brandon, Adam, Chase, Matthew, Noah, or Alex?**_

_**Leave me your thoughts and keep your eyes open for the next story which I am considering naming:**_

_**Bella Masen: The Brady Bunch Chronicles**_

_**What do you think?**_

_**Review! **_

_**It would make my heart weep with joy if we ever got 1K on this *wink wink* **_


	38. Author's Note and Teaser

**Hi everybody! I just wanted to let you all know that I haven't fallen off the side of the earth or anything, and I am writing for the third story. But I have been so pressed for time it's not even funny. I'm attending nine hour rehearsals and everything is a bit crazy. The show I'm in will be performed at the end of the week and then I'll be able to write and whatnot after that. I'm trying to prewrite enough chapters so that I can keep up my every other day posting schedule. Don't give up on me yet! Here's a little something that I hope will pique your interest:**

**BPOV**

"Mommy?" I flipped over and attempted to snuggle into Edward, meeting only a pillow. A knee slammed into the back of my leg and the bed jiggled a bit before there was heavy breathing on my forehead. "Mommy?" A heavy hand came down on my cheek and my eyes shot open when the small hand begun to squeeze the skin there.

"Olivia?" She nodded and grinned at me. "Why are you trying to beat me up?" She cocked her head to the side and giggled.

She batted her large green eyes innocently. "I'm not trying to beat you up, silly. I just want to know if I can use your toothbrush."

"No."

She kinked a confused eyebrow. "But I gots school."

"What happened to your toothbrush?"

"I threw it away."

"Why?"

"I dropped it on the plunger." I wrinkled my nose.

"How?"

"Tony clogged the potty." I sat up and pulled her into my lap, ready to pull teeth for these details.

"So how'd the toothbrush get on the toilet plunger?" She twirled her shoulder length brown hair around her fingers and furrowed her eyebrows.

"I dropped it in the potty, because Tony stinked up the bathroom." I narrowed my eyes and yawned. "Oh… never mind Mommy, you need your own toothbrush." She said pinching her nose closed.

"Yeah, yeah, I have a new toothbrush in the bathroom." She clapped happily and jumped off of my lap before darting to the bathroom. "Don't run." She nodded but didn't stop. The bedroom door shot open and Tony and Seth marched in.

"Hi, Mommy." Seth said softly as he headed into the bathroom, Tony bounced over to me and threw himself into my arms hugging me tightly.

"Will you make me breakfast, beautiful?" I lifted an eyebrow and kissed his nose.

"Beautiful?" He nodded and tapped my nose before winking, the little charmer.

"Sure, I thought Daddy was making breakfast."

"Daddy's a bum." He giggled.

"That's not nice or true."

"Sorry." He said unapologetically, before standing and pulling me out of bed. "I love you, Mommy." He threw in for good measure. I 'mhmm'ed and he pulled me towards the door.

"Don't make a mess in my bathroom!" I called over my shoulder there was a giggle from Olivia and then a metal clanging noise.

"Mommy is going to be pissed, O." Seth whispered loudly.

Olivia giggled before yelling, "Mommy! You need to get a new toothbrush…" I sighed and continued to let Tony drag me away.

"Mommy, can we get a puppy?"

"We already have one, Tony."

"Ellie?"

"I was thinking Daddy…" He frowned at me.

"Now that's not nice or true." He said sternly, mimicking my earlier words to a 'T'.

"Sorry." I smirked at him and he burst into giggles.

I rounded the corner of the kitchen where Ellie and Edward sat at the table, both fully dressed. Ellie was giving Edward one of her hormonal teenager glare's and Edward held up a finger as he read the paper in front of him.

Edward peeked up at her, "Keep looking at me like that and I will stick my finger up your nose, to here." He pointed to the bottom of his extended pointer finger with a lifted eyebrow and her eyes widened before she dissolved into laughter.

"What was that?" She asked between chuckles.

"I said the first thing that came to mind, don't judge me, child."

…BBC…

**Hope you laughed and or enjoyed :D**

**Well there we go, you've met the new Masen's.**

**Thank you for all of your reviews and support, you guys are honestly my rock.**

**Tentative publishing date for 'Bella Masen: The Brady Bunch Chronicles' is going to be around the sixteenth of March.**


	39. Go Check It Out!

**Hello everyone! The first chapter of the third story is up! Go check it out if you haven't already!**


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